[Drama 2022] Love (ft. Marriage & Divorce) Season 3 결혼작사 이혼작곡

[hsmz]

5 hours ago, Green Chilli said:

he was not a good husband once initially romance faded off , he started finding faults and finding excuses. 

 

Let's turn the table for a while - PSH is having same personality with his father

As an independent woman, successful & diva, you think she will marry him? I doubt that.

Ok, let's say PSH tricked her to get her to marry him & the truth being revealed after marriage. Do yo think BHR can hold it? Huhhhhhh, not in the million years! 

I think BHR is the one who will file the divorce, maybe a few months after their marriage. ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

He's a good husband, I believe he is, just he can't hold it anymore during the 2nd year of marriage when everything and all need to go with BHR's way since day 1 of their marriage without her giving a chance to him to discuss & express it. 

 

Once again, there was no compromise from BHR. Her biggest mistake is not giving him a chance and compromise in every talks and every actions between them. And this led to PSH's mistake, which he always said OK, yield, endure & hold it inside, then turned to someone else to share his problems and ask for advises. Along the way of sharing, he then found comfort and feel "sarang" to SW, that's would be his biggest mistake in his marriage and his life too. 

 

I agree with you, he is a reckless man when it comes to woman, maybe because he said he's not having much experience with woman. 

And no denial about this - he is a cheater.

[hsmz]

1 hour ago, partyon said:

The key to a healthy marriage is compromise. Both parties have to compromise if they want their marriage to work.

The power of compromise. 

[hsmz]

Spoiler episode 5

Spoiler

 *If only BHR did this before PSH cheats on her & change his heart...... A little affections won't hurt you darling...*

But still there's a story wait to be revealed behind this scene..

[lebeaucouple]

@partyon, @ktcjdrama

Thanks for sharing of your post earlier. 

Reading both of your comments, they stimulated some of my thoughts and I am sharing here :

 

From this drama characters, we learnt that blaming and judging others can lead to a "magnifying glass effect." This is where we are often busy paying attention to the shortcomings of others - the more we look into using our magnifying glass, the more we see their flaws and imperfections. But many times, we forgot and avoid looking at ourselves! We all know that sometimes situations are rarely just one person's fault. Just like we point 1 finger to a person (blaming their fault) but the rest of the fingers are facing back to us

 

During the marriage counselling, we would adopt this approach : "Pick up the Mirror (self reflection), instead of Magnifying Glass."

 

Ask some of the following genuine questions :

• How did I contribute to this situation?
• Where can I see what I did or did not do that made my own situation worse?
• If I re-experience this situation as someone who takes full responsibility for my actions and feelings, what will I notice
• What signals can I send to others (explicitly or implicitly) that contributed to this situation?
• Where can I be more tolerant and understanding?
• What will I do next time?

 

This is part of the self growth that will help a lot if the married couples sincerely look forward to a better and healthier relationship, provided they are willing to open their heart to make improvement.

 

It is always easier said than done. But a growth mindset is better than a fixed mindset. Making a bold step to change is the most encouraging one. I really hope to see these three wives take a brave step and contribute to a better life for themselves. 

 

[ktcjdrama]

15 minutes ago, lebeaucouple said:

During the marriage counselling, we would adopt this approach : "Pick up the Mirror (self reflection), instead of Magnifying Glass."

This is a very good motto! Thank you. I shall remember it well and share with others too.

 

15 minutes ago, lebeaucouple said:

I really hope to see these three wives take a brave step and contribute to a better life for themselves. 

This is what I've been more interested in seeing since the beginning of season 1 - how the wives will deal with their marriage crisis and triumph over it. Which is one of the reasons why I kinda skip-watching the second half of season 1 when the drama only concentrates on the husbands' affairs in flashbacks. Those were the eye-rolling and barfing episodes.

[hsmz]

48 minutes ago, lebeaucouple said:

During the marriage counselling, we would adopt this approach : "Pick up the Mirror (self reflection), instead of Magnifying Glass."

This is so me. I always remind myself, and of course my loved ones, to reflect yourself in the mirror. Of course I have been thru ups and down in my life, and I always said to myself to check myself in the mirror too rather than I put 100% blame on the other party. Like I fall after running on the slippery floor. Did I blame the floor or the person that cleaning the floor? No, I blamed myself because I wasn't careful enough. Same like in relationship, if we being cheated, yes, of course we feel betrayed and of course anger & disappointment because our partner cheated on us. No denial, he/she did a bad thing, but can we take a moment to look ourself in the mirror? Not to blame ourself completely, but to take a deep breath, change whatever than we can change to be better & move on (if leaving) or create new world (if staying) with new resolutions, ambitions and hopes. You are so precious. There's always rainbow after the rain right...

 

https://www.storypick.com/heartbreak-makes-you-a-better-person/

[Green Chilli]

12 hours ago, hsmz said:

If really the PIL sided with PSH, what I don't understand, why BHR still seeks their help and trust them?

 

She's maybe look very confident, independent and full of charisma woman, but she's not so smart enough to put her trust and let the PIL involve in this matter because by the end of the day, she still outsider like PSH's mom once said (or thinking in her imagination in season 1, I think it was the scene when she thinking how to tell her husband about the mistress's pregnancy.)

Yeah, one of the reason because they are rich so they can offer bucket of money to the mistress as she have the feeling that the misstress is a gold digger "who on earth in the world who will reject the offer to get the house and money yeaaaaa?" & another one, she knows the best bait in the world is to conceive with their grandchild who they wish for since day 1 their son married to her.

"I don't care of anything else, they must do what I said. She must go from our life even I have to push away my principal to stay childless in my marriage."

 

But what she didn't know, the PIL now grew the affections on the mistress. PIL's fault much? Yeah, you must said, they should've on the side with BHR, as she is their official DIL. But I said, they are human too. Even she didn't pregnant with their son's baby, but SW's personality what make them changed from "she is old gold digger!!!!!" to "how are you now, what do you craving to eat, let's come to our house for dessert and our driver will send you back to Seoul."

Please don't hate them, they only doing their responsibility towards the mom and their grandchild inside the womb. (but you are welcome it you do, I won't stop you) They are now so excited!

Ppaaalliii ppaaaliii BHR, get pregnant now.... 

 

However it is, for me, now come to my senses that BHR made a wrong choice to promise them to get pregnant. Yeah, PSH didn't have much other choice too as he also promised to give his sperm to his wife.

He must have a thinking, as BHR didn't want a divorce now, it's better to have legitimate child too apart of illegitimate child from his mistress. To work this marriage, latehhhh, baby first because baby is his aim and wish now. Jealousy can make people blind too! 

 

And I believe now, and in my thinking, PSH didn't care if BHR will raise the baby or not as his parents can hire 50 maids to take care if the baby of they want. He knew BHR so well.

 

He just want the new generation of Pan from him, boy will be a BONUS as per his parent's wish! He's selfish? If BHR can put herself first, and protect herself in this "battle", I think PSH have the same thought too.

 

Writer-nim, I feel dizzy again. 

 

 

It is because, compared to the other 2, she have quite disadvantages as per writer-nim shown. We have our most sympathy to Writer Lee, and the second place *drummm rolllsss* goes to SPY as she also a perfect wife and mom. But BHR, from the scenes, make a lot of people (not me only one) to think that she's part of the reason why he cheated on her. 

 

I agree with @ktcjdrama  PSH is a good husband, until the moment he slept with SW.

And I quoted this as I have the same thinking too.

 

 

 

 

She does not trust but she has to use everyone and everything now to her advantage as much as possible and that is what she is doing.

 

if you don’t trust it does. It mean you just and sit do nothing.

you know quite well PSh personality , yes he will donate sort a everywhere and will get parents hire maids to do the job . Of course wanting a child and raising a child is different . Raising is difficult , so he will hand it off .

 

10 hours ago, hsmz said:

 

Let's turn the table for a while - PSH is having same personality with his father

As an independent woman, successful & diva, you think she will marry him? I doubt that.

Ok, let's say PSH tricked her to get her to marry him & the truth being revealed after marriage. Do yo think BHR can hold it? Huhhhhhh, not in the million years! 

I think BHR is the one who will file the divorce, maybe a few months after their marriage. ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

He's a good husband, I believe he is, just he can't hold it anymore during the 2nd year of marriage when everything and all need to go with BHR's way since day 1 of their marriage without her giving a chance to him to discuss & express it. 

 

Once again, there was no compromise from BHR. Her biggest mistake is not giving him a chance and compromise in every talks and every actions between them. And this led to PSH's mistake, which he always said OK, yield, endure & hold it inside, then turned to someone else to share his problems and ask for advises. Along the way of sharing, he then found comfort and feel "sarang" to SW, that's would be his biggest mistake in his marriage and his life too. 

 

I agree with you, he is a reckless man when it comes to woman, maybe because he said he's not having much experience with woman. 

And no denial about this - he is a cheater.

He has same sexist views as his father which are slowly coming out now.

 

he could not voice his views or too meek to pursue because BHR does not agree to that nonsense. That’s why I said if would have been more assertive , either BHR would have accommodated  or divorced him.

[Elmaas]

I've seen a couple of post blaming BRH for throwing out the food that MIL brought over but idk if everyone remembers that one of the flashbacks revealed that the food went bad which was the reason she threw it. Blaming her for that incident is kind of 

 

Here's what I think happened in their marriage and I'll try to be as objective as I possibly can.

 

PSH met a beautiful woman and he fell heads over heals. She was strong, independent and the opposite of everything he was used to. He didn't care that she was a workeholic or that she valued the finer things in life and that having a perfect image was important to her because at that time getting her was more important than if they were compatible. After getting married and after that the newly married bubble burst, things that were charming and unique about her started to drive him insane. Instead of putting on his big boy pants and sitting down to have difficult discussions with his wife, he ran away. He started to play mind games with her and started to expect her to know that the life they were leading wasn't anymore the one he wanted. He started to resent her and when another woman came along that was similar to the one he imagined being with in his mind, he went for it. 

 

I don't blame him for anything that happened prior to the cheating. I really think his parents marriage messed him up. He grew up with an unhealthy marriage where the husband abuses and berates his wife and family. His mother never really stood up for herself or for him and I think meeting BRH felt like a breath of fresh air for him. But I don't think you can really know how to be in a marriage with someone like BRH that is so different from what you're used to without dealing with your demons and trauma first. That's why I don't really think his relationship with the mistress will work out in the long run. I don't think he knows what he wants and how to be in a relationship.th

 

When it comes to BRH, I think she's way too modern and independent to be with someone with PSH background. She needs to cut her losses and move on because being with PSH and his family will mess her up even more than it has at this point. It takes two people to break a marriage so I do think she played a role in the deterioration of her marriage but I don't think it's her fault that he cheated. People cheat because they want to cheat and there's nothing the other partner can do or say to make them not cheat. 

 

Another long winded comment but I wanted to rant lol.

[hsmz]

16 hours ago, Green Chilli said:

either BHR would have accommodated  or divorced him.

 

I believe BHR also knew a lot about PSH before they were married based on his family background. During dating days, we often go to each other parents house right, and we observe their family. I'm not sure either writer-nim made her an observant type, or just didn't care, "even his parents disapprove at first, but he is so crazeeeeeee in love with me. He can follow all my rules, my terms, my way, and he really really wants me to marry him, yeahhhhh why not?" - have seen so many woman around me like this. Look how she brag to her friends about getting a younger man. Not saying BHR is not a good woman, some woman are born that way. She's no evil, she's just being herself and we should respect even we don't like woman act that way.

 

But still, she chooses to marry him and then after few years he can't stand her, just like he can stands her during their dating days. He demands more, to get the affectionate that he desires from a wife & being considerate to him, but as she said, she will never change. Yeah, that's good because I can see, she is a firm woman. We needs a lot of woman like her in our society. BUT, we must always always know which situation we have to be firm to, and which situation we need to be considerate. In BHR's situation, she being too firm with her husband and their marriage & ended her husband, who faced his own issues in his marriage, seek advices from someone else - a woman to be exact and that woman turns out to be the woman of his dream. Gentle, soft-spoken, affectionate, witty, and they clicked. He then cheats on her. And this is when she needs to take a look at the mirror and reflect herself. Yeah, some of you maybe not agree with me and said, she done nothing wrong to be cheated because he as the husband should have some balls to share those issues to her face rather than share with someone else, woman especially. But we know, how she is right. She will never accept as she thinks "this is me.. either you accept me as I am or leave it."

 

But things happened, and sometimes rather than blaming all the time, it's much better if we can take time to reflect and ask ourself in the mirror, what actually went wrong in my marriage/relationship till he cheats. But in BHR's case, she will not ask PSH why he cheated because she thinks she didn't have to.

 

PSH made a mistake, very big mistake because he was lost to his own temptation. Even he strictly said it was unintentionally, but no one will believe him, not even his mother at first. He is a cheater, no doubt about it and BHR, herself now needs face this pain.

 

I agree with you, she would have accommodates or divorce

accommodate : if she wants to be with him - but she have to change, change her principals which she clearly don't want to 

divorce : she will loose a lawyer husband & all the benefits she have thru her PIL and title divorcee. But if it's the best choice, go with it. Hopefully she will find a man better than her ex & live happily ever after.

 

*some people choose to stay in marriage because of various & numerous reasons. money, fame, benefits, kids, etc

*some rather divorce than have to change to be someone else and just need to move from toxic and hurtful marriage 

 

Same like everybody who watch this drama, I also like writer-nim to give all the 3 wives all the happiness that they deserve.

"Every end is a new beginning." 

 

[hsmz]

16 hours ago, Elmaas said:

idk if everyone remembers that one of the flashbacks revealed that the food went bad which was the reason she threw it.

the reason - the food went bad because they were never eat it home together or by themselves. I believe, it's the same before and after the cheating. PSH doesn't want to eat by himself as he was being raised by a mother who serves the foods in front of him and he expects his wife to do the same.

 

Can see from their lines :

PSH - "Then we should eat it more often. For breakfast & dinner."

BHR - "Then do it yourself. Why should it be my job? Don't expect me to do what you can't do?"

PSH sighed

BHR : "Am I wrong?"

PSH : "No, what you said is right, so let's drop it."

 

In this case both of them blamed each other. But it's too late now, the damage has been done, some of the food are going to the bin.

 

And after that, he then have the nerve to say she needs to inform his mother to stop sending he food in front of her face because he knows, that was actually the right thing to do to avoid food waste. He just want his wife to tell his mother because he wants BHR to take the responsibility over the food that she threw.

 

And... according to @Green Chilli 

 

Quote

He has same sexist views as his father which are slowly coming out now.

But for me, he's not being sexist. He's just being ego.

"Man has his own ego, that's why he told his wife to tell the mother not to send the food, instead of him telling his mother himself."

 

But as expected, BHR hesitates. Of course she hesitates as she was lying to her MIL all this time. I understand why she lies, she just want the MIL to feel less worry about her son's meal but at the same time she didn't want her MIL to think she is bad wife who can't fix her own husband's meals.

 

Either he or she tells the mother, the ending would be the same. The mother will know both of them are lying all the time about the food and will feel so hurt when she knows her foods ended up in the bin most of the time.

 

And now, if you can see, both of them still didn't tell the mother to stop sending food. You can find the easter egg in the new season. 

 

"Food is just another metaphor that the writer-nim used in the drama"

[Lmangla]

16 hours ago, lebeaucouple said:

During the marriage counselling, we would adopt this approach : "Pick up the Mirror (self reflection), instead of Magnifying Glass."

ooh, some interesting discussions on the drama as well as stories of real life. just peeking in though I am not actively watching this drama. so this  line of "pick up the mirror" reminded me of the serenity prayer. (serenity means peace, inner calm)

 

 

 

we often think of change as this negative but it is actually constant. as the months turn into years, we do change whether in terms of personality, our physical bodies, our interactions. every single change forces us to adapt. when we join a new workplace, can we hold on to the old way of doing things at our previous employer? we might suggest changes to the process but sometimes those inputs will not be taken or appreciated. in that case, we have to adapt and do it the way the new employer demands. so that is an example of accepting what we cannot change, knowing what you can and having the wisdom to know the difference. some changes are natural, some are forced upon us. the pandemic has disrupted lives everywhere and we have no choice but to adapt for the time being. 

 

the same thing applies to people in any relationship. when we understand what can and cannot be changed, then we are far more at ease in any relationship. am reminded of this article that I came across about love languages. so if chingus are not aware, there is this concept of love languages -- basically that people have different ways of expressing love. that is why some chingus here are saying food isn't a big deal while others are saying "yes it is and it is understandable the why 30s husband felt that way". it really depends on your love language and how you express your affection.

 

so this article writer shared her own story. her mother died when both she and brother were young and so it was just the siblings and their dad and they were tight knit. after the brother got a job and moved away, both father and sister felt a distance. they called him but he didn't have much to say and when she sent him updates on her children through whatsapp, he didn't respond at all. they felt hurt and felt that he no longer cared about them. father and daughter on the other hand would chat every day constantly. so they were very close and often frustrated by the distance and lack of communication from the brother. they felt betrayed and were a little angry/annoyed with him.

 

so one day, her eldest had to be admitted to hospital ER for appendicitis. meanwhile, the dad was not feeling well and sick. she had two toddlers at home and her husband was out of the country and unable to immediately fly back. all of this is happening late at night around 9-10 PM. she was at her wits end and called up her brother and just wept. as usual, he didn't really say anything.

 

a couple of hours later, she was shocked to see him at the hospital. after her phone call, he had immediately packed a bag, called his office for leave and driven the 4-5 hour ride and was there around 1-2 in the morning. he then took charge in a very quiet efficient manner. took care of the dad as well as the toddlers, cooked, cleaned and even sent her food at the hospital. by the time, her hubby had come back, her son had been discharged from hospital and dad had recovered from fever.

 

so when the brother was getting ready to go back, father and sister had a chat with him. so basically they were like "we thought you didn't care." at this, the brother was stunned. he was like "I don't know what you are talking about." and they were like "we call but you don't talk". he was like "what is there to talk? I go to work. I come home, eat, sleep and the next day same thing." the sister was like "I thought you don't like my kids". he was like "of course I like them. they are my nephew and nieces." the sister was like "but you don't respond to the photos or videos" and he was like "I see everything you send but what exactly am I supposed to say?" she was like "you could have sent an emoji!"  

 

anyway, the father and sister basically realized that their way of showing affection was "verbal affirmation" -- so they use words and talk a lot; spend time chatting. in contrast, the brother was a quiet person and his way of affection was "acts of service" -- doing things for someone quietly and efficiently, the super boring stuff that people may not realize. both sides realized that some changes had to be made but at the same time, some things will be the same. so father and sister accepted that brother was never going to chat like they do and not get hurt by the shortness of the phone call. the brother made more of an effort to speak a little more and send emojis to whatsapp messages.  so both sides had to make a few changes but also accept what cannot be changed. 

 

so while the above example isn't marriage counseling, it is an example of family relationships mending. change is necessary and yielding isn't a sign of defeat.

 

especially when it comes to families, there is an element of change. a child parent relationship at 3 years is not the same as 15 years or at 40 years. if a relationship does not change and evolve, then it can cause issues like between father and sons in "be my dream family" where the dad never developed an adult child-parent relationship.  @africandramalover and me are both enjoying this daily -- it is really well-written.

 

anyway, back to this -- we often expect the other person to change completely and do what's comfortable for us. some might argue the 30s wife need not change and it is the 30s husband who is fully at fault and therefore has to change. other chings might argue the reverse. however, real mending occurs when we meet somewhere in the middle and that happens when we look in the mirror instead of picking the magnifying glass.... now whether or not these two actually want to mend their relationship or will do is another question altogether! 

 

[Elmaas]

@hsmz Yea but he knew that she was on a strict diet so I don't understand why he's getting mad at her. Why should she throw everything she's worked for in the trash because he doesn't feel like telling his mom that maybe she shouldn't bring over that much food anymore. It's his mother so I don't understand why the onus is on BHR to tell the MIL. She shouldn't have to cook for him since he's and adult 30+year-old who have full functioning hands and mind. I get that he's changed and he's looking for something more in the marriage but that's why he should've taken a moment to talk things over with his wife. That's what grown ups do. 

 

Again, I think his parents marriage messed him up a lot. He doesn't know how to have a healthy communication with other people so he relays on manipulative tactics to get his way. He tried to make this parents hate his wife by telling them that she's not an ideal wife and when that didn't work he manipulated his them to feel bad for the mistress. He never apologized to BHR for cheating, he just expected her to be ok with what he's done and end the marriage on his terms. He's selfish, manipulative man child who blames everything that went wrong in his marriage on other people.  

[hsmz]

2 hours ago, Elmaas said:

Yea but he knew that she was on a strict diet so I don't understand why he's getting mad at her. Why should she throw everything she's worked for in the trash because he doesn't feel like telling his mom that maybe she shouldn't bring over that much food anymore. It's his mother so I don't understand why the onus is on BHR to tell the MIL. She shouldn't have to cook for him since he's and adult 30+year-old who have full functioning hands and mind. 

They both to be blamed for this, no doubt. His mother did nothing wrong, it's normal for mothers to send the food over to her children. It's mother's joy and she loves it, how can we stop her. It's their responsible to tell her in a proper and well-mannered way for her to stop sending the food. Yes, you said why it shouldn't be BHR's responsible to tell the mother to stop sending the food. But did she talk to her husband regarding this issue before the fight happened? I don't think so, that's why he got mad. If she talk and discuss about this with her husband beforehand and then they both meet the mother to tell about this, I don't think the mother will feel so offended. But she takes the easy way - to lie so that the mother will worry less.

And I blame PSH because he is too lazy to check the food in the fridge (isn't most of the man same like this?) and also so busy meeting his life counselor. He also can talk to his mother about the food right and tell her that they are so busy now, so no time to eat at home, or maybe reduce the portion or if they miss her cook, he can go and eat at their house. Instead, he just ignore it. Yes, I can't agree more, he was to be blamed too.

Truth hurt, but lying even more worst. But, still, they receive it and have no felling of guilty even they know, the food will end up in the fridge and in the end, some of it will be threw in the bin. Pffttttttt!!!

 

2 hours ago, Elmaas said:

I get that he's changed and he's looking for something more in the marriage but that's why he should've taken a moment to talk things over with his wife. That's what grown ups do. 

Yeah, they should talk it over before the fight, either to eat it together or call the mother and inform the mother to stop sending the food. But end up, they try to solve the thing with fight. It's too late, the damage has been done. They will never get the mutual agreement, they even can fight over food and blame each other.

 

And I agree, they both didn't have a healthy communication and healthy marriage life. He wants more from his wife, but the wife wouldn't want to change. And he doesn't have the balls to stand up for himself and make her listen to what's been keeping inside or firmly to get a divorce before he cheats. 

 

"Self reflections is scary, but necessary for the growth"

 

 

[Green Chilli]

6 hours ago, hsmz said:

the reason - the food went bad because they were never eat it home together or by themselves. I believe, it's the same before and after the cheating. PSH doesn't want to eat by himself as he was being raised by a mother who serves the foods in front of him and he expects his wife to do the same.

 

Can see from their lines :

PSH - "Then we should eat it more often. For breakfast & dinner."

BHR - "Then do it yourself. Why should it be my job? Don't expect me to do what you can't do?"

PSH sighed

BHR : "Am I wrong?"

PSH : "No, what you said is right, so let's drop it."

 

In this case both of them blamed each other. But it's too late now, the damage has been done, some of the food are going to the bin.

 

And after that, he then have the nerve to say she needs to inform his mother to stop sending he food in front of her face because he knows, that was actually the right thing to do to avoid food waste. He just want his wife to tell his mother because he wants BHR to take the responsibility over the food that she threw.

 

And... according to @Green Chilli 

 

But for me, he's not being sexist. He's just being ego.

"Man has his own ego, that's why he told his wife to tell the mother not to send the food, instead of him telling his mother himself."

 

But as expected, BHR hesitates. Of course she hesitates as she was lying to her MIL all this time. I understand why she lies, she just want the MIL to feel less worry about her son's meal but at the same time she didn't want her MIL to think she is bad wife who can't fix her own husband's meals.

 

Either he or she tells the mother, the ending would be the same. The mother will know both of them are lying all the time about the food and will feel so hurt when she knows her foods ended up in the bin most of the time.

 

And now, if you can see, both of them still didn't tell the mother to stop sending food. You can find the easter egg in the new season. 

 

"Food is just another metaphor that the writer-nim used in the drama"

He wants his wife to be like his mom subservient and do all what she does for his father .

 

he may have an ego that is an addition but his views are sexist. 
 

MIL and FIL don’t like wife much , a reasonable husband will handle tricky subjects with his family himself , like telling mom not to send food and she sends it for him so he will ensure he eats it not blame wife who is cleaning out the fridge ... actually to think she is doing house work cleaning out fridge by throwing bad food LOL  she specifically says she is throwing only food that is gone bad, he did not go all the way in the argument , just ran away from it again and dropped it and then resented her and went and complained somewhere else to a women who will agree to his views 

 

her MIL already knows that she does not cook nor like her food . She ate in front of MIL and did not take much rice and MIL disapproved .

 

the reason why BHR said his mom will 

feel bad is they tell to her face that they don’t want food , she says all elder folks are like that they would feel bad for rejecting something that live to do  . Nothing to do with bad wife , they all know she does not cook.

 

 

[agenth]

Isn't it ironic BHR's radio show is named "Boo Hye Rung's Love, Memories and Music". Yeah I know the introduction and epilogue etc is written by others. It just shows that she is just the face of perfection, but beyond the illusion, the reality is that her marriage is pretty shallow. 

 

I understand that it is important for her to keep up appearances instead of divorce, because her current career depends on her having a great home life. If word were to come out divorce is initiated due to her husband cheating, her listeners would probably not tune in her show. Then again, her team didn't even do proper research anyway, as I remember one of the guests chastising her for her not knowing basic milestones of his life lol. 

 

52 minutes ago, Green Chilli said:

MIL and FIL don’t like wife much , a reasonable husband will handle tricky subjects with his family himself , like telling mom not to send food and she sends it for him so he will ensure he eats it not blame wife who is cleaning out the fridge ... actually to think she is doing house work cleaning out fridge by throwing bad food LOL  she specifically says she is throwing only food that is gone bad, he did not go all the way in the argument , just ran away from it again and dropped it and then resented her and went and complained somewhere else to a women who will agree to his views 

 

BHR isn't PIL's favourite person, no. But they don't hate her. They just don't think she fits with their son, as proven now. Honestly, they are being nice to her. In another kdrama I'd have expected parents to just ice her out or plan her murder  In real life, too, parents would not like DIL who doesn't respect them or treat their son right. 

 

In this drama the PIL are actually pretty nice toward their DIL. They actually are trying to help her and do as she says. What do you expect / What more do you want?

[ktcjdrama]

7 hours ago, Lmangla said:

reminded me of the serenity prayer.

Love this prayer and had it placed in my wallet for many years when I was (so much) younger and life was more turbulent 

 

7 hours ago, Lmangla said:

it really depends on your love language and how you express your affection.

The 5 Love Languages ~ words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service, and receiving gifts.

If any of you are interested to read more, there is a book on it. There are also quizzes to take on the official website.

[Songbae]

What does this emoji mean  ?

[hsmz]

23 hours ago, Green Chilli said:

He wants his wife to be like his mom subservient and do all what she does for his father .

 

he may have an ego that is an addition but his views are sexist. 
 

MIL and FIL don’t like wife much , a reasonable husband will handle tricky subjects with his family himself , like telling mom not to send food and she sends it for him so he will ensure he eats it not blame wife who is cleaning out the fridge ... actually to think she is doing house work cleaning out fridge by throwing bad food LOL  she specifically says she is throwing only food that is gone bad, he did not go all the way in the argument , just ran away from it again and dropped it and then resented her and went and complained somewhere else to a women who will agree to his views 

 

her MIL already knows that she does not cook nor like her food . She ate in front of MIL and did not take much rice and MIL disapproved .

 

the reason why BHR said his mom will 

feel bad is they tell to her face that they don’t want food , she says all elder folks are like that they would feel bad for rejecting something that live to do  . Nothing to do with bad wife , they all know she does not cook.

 

 

Yeah, at first he accepts who BHR is but along the way, he feels fed up as she didn't have the effort to at least, to spend time eat together at home even after 2 years of their marriage. He didn't ask or expect her to cook like everyday. And, she can cook, PSH mentioned she complained when she cooked during holidays. He just needs to eat home cooking at least once a while together, but still she didn't want to. Or at least she be a thoughtful wife to prepare him a cooked rice for him before leaving.  She loves to prioritize herself first, and if they spend time eating together, always eating out. PSH is in #TeamICan'tEatAloneAtHome I guess, so he will feel lonely if he eats by himself at home. It's not he can't prepare by himself, I believe he can, but he just wants eat together because for him, eating together at home will make the bond more closer and it's a good quality time to spend too. (scene he cooked for SW & his unborn baby. Look how he happy he was by eating together, using the same spoon and smile together..)

*once again, food is just one of the metaphors writer-nim used in her drama as I did mentioned in one of my post

 

Quote

He wants his wife to be like his mom subservient and do all what she does for his father .

"Apple doesn't fall from the tree"

But I don't think he wants his wife to be just like his mother, too devoted but at least he needs she to show some affections."

 

Quote

change is necessary and yielding isn't a sign of defeat.

"Even wild cat can become tame & kittenish if we treat the cat right, full of love and passion."

 

Agree with @agenth, even at first they didn't approve her, but once she became their DIL, they love her too. If not, why they got mad at PSH when they found about his cheating? Some of PIL will blindly take side of their son and blaming the DIL. But did they blame her? No. They took her side and got mad at PSH and even checked her voice on the radio after the cheating. My respect to the PIL! But, even they love her, but they didn't adore her too much as she's not the type of clingy DIL that can spend the time with her MIL to go shopping, cook together, eat together, having long chats together happily & laughing. But they proud of her as their celebrity DIL. Even she's not that kind of clingy DIL but I believe the PIL accepted her as she is. MIL sent the food and put her trust on her DIL for taking care her son's meals. Yes, he is 30s man, but he still her baby maknae. She have the rights to be worried about his meals. Some sons also love his mom to spoil them like that. And she knew her son so well, that her son loves to eat home made meals. Of course she brought the foods FOR BOTH OF THEM to eat, no mother in the world give food and said to her DIL "this food is for my son only." Of course, she already know they are both busy and she didn't cook at home. But if they both don't eat the food regularly, just be honest with MIL. If she didn't want to tell the MIL, then both of them need to come with a solution how to tell the mother not to send the food or maybe reduce the portion. But as they have a communication breakdown, the food became the victim and most of it then end up in the bin.

I didn't even say she is a bad wife, I just pointing the reason why she lied to her MIL - maybe she didn't wants her MIL to think she is bad wife as she didn't fix her husband's meal.

 

Quote

actually to think she is doing house work cleaning out fridge by throwing bad food LOL  she specifically says she is throwing only food that is gone bad

Yes, that's good at least she also have an effort to do some minimal house work duty. But it will be much better if she can ask her husband to clean food together or at least inform him in advance so that his husband didn't get so mad looking at her arrogantly threw his mother's food in front of him. 

 

If they both or one of them tell the mother, I believe all mother in the world can understand if we tell her that we are so busy with works, so not everyday we can eat at home. Yeah, at first maybe she feel quite unhappy because she worried about their meals, but a good son & DIL knows how to comfort and make her not to be worried. And agreed with PSH, it's better to tell her honestly than throw the foods. Instead, she taking the easy way to lie and I guess PSH lied too when his mother asked him (not seeing in the drama tho but we saw he lied in I-Forget-My-PIL-Birthday scene right?)

 

It was so nice that the MIL didn't take a look at their fridge during her visit like any other extreme MIL. If she saw the food untouched, what will she feels? I can't imagine.

 

"Honesty is the best policy."

They say, our partner is our reflections. In this drama, the wife lied, the husband lied too. They both love to lie.

Just PSH being caught red-handed and now he have to face all the consequences. Aigooooo...

Now everything was in a mess 

[Green Chilli]

18 hours ago, agenth said:

Isn't it ironic BHR's radio show is named "Boo Hye Rung's Love, Memories and Music". Yeah I know the introduction and epilogue etc is written by others. It just shows that she is just the face of perfection, but beyond the illusion, the reality is that her marriage is pretty shallow. 

 

I understand that it is important for her to keep up appearances instead of divorce, because her current career depends on her having a great home life. If word were to come out divorce is initiated due to her husband cheating, her listeners would probably not tune in her show. Then again, her team didn't even do proper research anyway, as I remember one of the guests chastising her for her not knowing basic milestones of his life lol. 

 

 

BHR isn't PIL's favourite person, no. But they don't hate her. They just don't think she fits with their son, as proven now. Honestly, they are being nice to her. In another kdrama I'd have expected parents to just ice her out or plan her murder  In real life, too, parents would not like DIL who doesn't respect them or treat their son right. 

 

In this drama the PIL are actually pretty nice toward their DIL. They actually are trying to help her and do as she says. What do you expect / What more do you want?

Every show has a writer , so it is not just her show that relies on writer. the teammates compliment on the Adlibs she does , we don’t need to diss her talent too just because we are biased against her.

 

she has her own show because she has talent obviously.

 

yes I think there will be impact on the show if she gets divorced as there will be gossip but it will drive away all her listeners  I don’t know. Ideally listeners will sympathize with her if any but as usual celebrities will be a fodder for gossip and hate comments .

 

plan her murder LOL ... they also have their reasons for being nice to her , they will also face loss of reputation in case of messy divorce and PIL fear that bad feelings of hurt individual will affect their son and family  .

 

we also have seen how they swayed at the mentioned or baby initially so they are really not that reliable for BHR point of view. We will see what they will do in future .
 

[hsmz]

Honestly, I love to read all the comments here regarding this drama. Either we agree or we disagree with it, we discuss it so well because that's viewers like us do. We give feedbacks based on our own opinion.

 

And here, I share some spoilers in MV OST part 5. They show more about Dr Shin, SPY & Ami also a few scenes of PSH, BHR, SW & the PIL.

 

From MY POV, PSH is a Cheater That I Can't Hate. This is what I personally think. If you wanna hate him, you are please to do so.

 

Spoiler