[Drama 2017] Because This Is My First Life 이번 생은 처음이라

cluelessdreamer · October 23, 2017

I am already in tears here!! Oh god just reading the live update is making me so emotional.

I never doubted this show once since its inception and oh boy i am not disappointed!!

Will keep a box of tissues handy tonight..

I just have wake up at like 3 in the morning so that i catch the subbed version asap. Hmm.. I know I am crazy but that's just how it is when I really love a kdrama!

lavender2love · October 23, 2017

NEED SUBS....... !!!!

packmule3 · October 23, 2017

Tagging @CamelKnight and @lavender2love. Both your shout-outs are difficult to ignore. I was at London Heathrow typing this but had to wait till I got home to post for the pics. Sorry to keep you two hanging.

It’s the cinematography, not so much the script, which I find appealing in this drama. Aside from showing what the characters SEE around them, the camera also reveals what they FEEL inside. It's a very subjective camera in the sense that it explores the consciousness of the protagonists through its lens.

Take for instance, the scene when SaeHee was interviewed by JiHoo’s dad about his job. The close-up of SH’s face amplified his changing facial expressions as his brain processed the cues JH had pre-warned him about her father. His face reminded me of a computer program: there was input of data (JiHoo’s three flags) and output of reaction (his behavior modification). lol. Was this how you proposed to your wife, @CamelKnight?

Combine that hilarious scene with his earlier failure to understand JH’s dad’s description of the crab soybean stew as an invitation to eat heartily, and the viewers would GET a real sense of SH’s character that wasn’t written in words. There was a SUBCONTEXT -- at least to me. His actions and reactions are symptomatic of a person with a mild form of autism or a high-functioning autism commonly known as Asperger. But I’m not here as a psychologist….

Typically in dramas, the thoughts and emotions of the characters are revealed through the dialogues and voiceovers. But in BTIMFL, the spoken words, and more importantly UNSPOKEN words between SaeHee and JiHoo, are highlighted by the VISUALS. Little details, e.g., the facial expressions, the landscape, the background, the props, and the lighting, capture the internal tension and the awkwardness of the characters. The visuals are important because when one character is literal-minded, like SH, the pictures/props can convey his intent and meaning in a way that his words can’t.

I’ll give you another example: the bus stops. The ad posters in the bus sheds aren’t incidentals; they emphasize something.

From Episode 1.

Spoiler

SaeHee’s strategic location in front of poster made him look comical, like a reindeer with antlers. His visual would correspond to JiHo’s musing later on. On the bus, she reflected that SH’s nonsense was exactly what she needed after her embarrassing discovery of her one-sided crush. In a way, she regained her sanity with his insane comparison of feline and human neocortexes.

Spoiler

On the other hand, when JiHo stood up to take her leave, the poster of an enlarged bracelet with a doggie bone lucky charm became a pet collar around her neck.

Spoiler

I believe that her visual here was a foreshadowing of her role in SH’s life. lol. Nooo, she wouldn’t transform into a house pet. But she was a vulnerable creature that SH wouldn’t shelter, protect and care for in his home like his Kitty.

BTW, calling his pet cat Kitty was one sign for me that SH was wired differently. He was literal-minded. His pet was a cat so why would he bother call it by any other name? Same with his numeric passcode 0101* -- lol. I take it that this was the same passcode that his drunken roommate had forgotten so I understand now why he didn’t come to open the door for him. How could anybody forget a simple binary passcode? There are only 16 possible combinations.

From Episode 2

She left the wedding party partly to escape the mini-reunion of Seoul National University alums and partly to go to her script meeting. Behind her, the bus shed glass was clear except for a ghostly residual of an old poster. Her friend Ho-Rang followed her and gave her a pep talk on writing.

Spoiler

To me, the glass wall of the bus shed symbolized her career as a screenwriter. Since graduation, there was nothing TANGIBLE to show for her efforts, except a trace here and there, because she had been a ghostwriter all the time.

From Episode 3

Spoiler

She sat under the poster of 10 murderers. People were looking at her as if she was a murderer…or a demented person because she had been walking in her pajamas.

Spoiler

The poster of railroad tracks leading to infinity was representative of her feelings. She was tired of endless troubles in the cold city and home sounded good to her at that time.

From Episode 4

She was waiting for him at the bus stop. They were going to tell her parents about their marriage plans. The posters were empty.

The meaning of the empty posters would come later. She was curious to know how people older than her had coped with life, and he opined that situations are different so there was no point in asking.

SH: There should be a new standard for the new generation. For example --
JH: Marriage? Is that what you want to talk about?
SH: Yes.

The posters were empty because their future married life together would be a reboot. They were starting with a clean slate with no pre-existing paradigms or old models to follow.

So there you go, an overview of the visual from the bus stops. lol.

In addition to the posters, I think audience should also pay attention to the reflected images or the images seen through the glass. The director seems to use glass and reflection to convey a message about the character. Three notable ones:

in Episode 2, after the director attempted to rape JH. She was walking down the street in her pajamas and was about to call SoJi when she saw her disheveled self reflected on a store window. After seeing her image, she opted not to call SJ. In this instance, the glass reminded her of invisible walls that people have to close off their dearest friends from knowing dirty or humiliating secrets.

Spoiler

in Episode 3, when SoJi was trying to contact JH all day. She was smoking outdoors and she crushed her cigarette but.t on the glass wall when she heard her colleagues come out for a smoke. To me, the glass wall there was symbolic of the “glass ceiling” women encounter when in a male-dominated field. If you notice, all of her colleagues were male. She appeared to be the only female at the management level. She was set apart from them.

in Episode 4, when JH and SH were on the train ride back to the townhouse. They were both looking at each other’s reflection on the glass. To me, the use of glass here to observe the other person, instead of looking at each other eye-to-eye, suggested that a barrier existed between them. They were more comfortable studying their reflected image. Although they had agreed to marry, they realized that they were out of their depth. They were stuck together in the train but had nothing to talk about… like polite strangers. The oddness of their situation became painfully obvious when a couple beside them were cooing at each other.

Spoiler

Aside from cinematography, another aspect I like about the show is the various references to the film The Graduate (1967). lol. You weren’t born yet when this show became the zeitgeist of the late 1960s so let me tell you what I remember.

First, the poster. Frankly, I am annoyed with Viki for blurring the poster of The Graduate. Darnit! That poster is significant.

We first saw the poster in Episode 1 when JH arrived at her home. Her brother had a Star Wars poster on his door while she had The Graduate on her door. In Episode 4, we found out that the poster had been in fact hanging on her wall when she was still in high school applying for college. I thought it was ironic that what inspired her in high school to study Korean Literature and to become a writer in college was actually an award-winning American film based on a novel written by a college grad.

The same poster must truly have been her source of motivation because it was her only personal decor in her rented room with SaeHee. Not only that, when she left behind her first completed script in her bedroom, she also left behind the poster. Now, I didn't know that there was a Korean version of the poster because here in the US, the poster prominently displayed a woman's leg with a stocking half-off/half-off while Benjamin (the male lead) stood by the bedroom door.

Spoiler

The American poster

BTW, this iconic seduction/Cougar moment was duplicated by Soo-Ji in the car when she put on her stockings to meet the boss. hmmm...remind me to discuss the sexual harassment subplot in this kdrama. ugh!

In the kdrama poster, we are shown instead the final bus scene after Benjamin ran off Elaine. Background info on the movie for reference:

Spoiler

Benjamin and Elaine had a convoluted relationship; she was the daughter of the older woman Benjamin was having a secret dalliance with. In that final movie scene, Elaine had just married another man and Benjamin came to disrupt the marriage service. She and Benjamin fled the church, locking their guests inside the church, and boarded a passing bus. Exhilarated by their daring escape, they rushed to the back seat. They ignored the shocked looks of the elderly passengers on the bus. But their happiness was short-lived. Within minutes, the ENORMITY of their rebellious action would sink in as they stared silently ahead.

Do you see why it looks familiar? In the upcoming episode, JiHo and SaeHee is also pictured running to get on a bus. They too will sit at the back of the bus, and they too will quietly stare ahead. lol.

Although this kdrama will replicate the final scene of The Graduate, I think however the REALITY of their impulsive action (JH’s friends would think it was her normal CRAZY self) had long set in. Unlike Benjamin and Elaine, SH and JH were entering the new relationship with open eyes.

Which is kinda funny...because on the train ride coming from the bus depot, they stood silently side by side on the train and couldn't meet each other's eyes. @lavender2love, that's why you love those couch scenes. They're essentially dealing with a "therapy couch" or a psychiatrist couch where each person would lay bear his/her feelings to be analyzed and sorted out.

When SH and JH arrived home in Episode 4 to discuss the new conditions of their marriage, SH realized that he was marrying an unusual woman. In his words, “I decided to marry my tenant today. I know. It’s not a choice an ordinary person would make… I found a very unusual woman as my wife.” They both understood the seriousness of their relationship but instead of scaring them like normal people, they welcomed the change. They found a new sense on peace and contentment from their quirky arrangement which was based on a monetary value: “a $50 dollar discounted” relationship.

The second reference to the movie is the tagline, “This is Benjamin. He’s a little worried about his future.”

However, while in the movie, Benjamin was worried about the FUTURE ambiguity of his life after graduation and how he would make a difference in the world, JiHo and her friends were anxious about the CONTINUED lack of fulfillment in their lives nearly a decade after their college graduation. They had originally aspired to follow their dreams and to be different. But almost a decade later, JiHo realized the uncertainty of their chosen paths: whether she and her friends were getting closer to the dream or in fact going farther away from it.

For instance, since she was 17, Ho-Rang always wanted to be a wife and a mother but her boyfriend of seven years hadn’t proposed and didn’t seem to have marriage in his mind. Since high school, Soo-Ji always wanted to be the boss, but until now, she was an employee serving at the beck-and-call of the boss.

Then there was JiHo herself. Since she made a birthday wish when she was 20, she always dreamt of becoming a writer. But so far, she had been relegated to writing scenes for product placement for daytime dramas. Instead of writing an inspiring masterpiece, her work was tied to the mundane purposes of raising monetary funds through sponsored ads (horrors!) so the drama could continue its production. She’d been an unknown freelancer all this time.

The sad fact was, after graduation, JH and her friends had compromised their dreams to keep on living.

There were other references to the movie aside from the poster and the bus ride.

There was the luggage. In the beginning of the movie, The Graduate, Benjamin was in the airport. Everybody was moving around him but he appeared static. His suitcase was alone moving down the baggage conveyer. This scene was taken to be a metaphor of his apathy and immobility. He didn’t know how to go forward in his future life.

In contrast, we have JiHoo and her luggage. She was hauling her luggage everywhere with her. At the bus depot in Episode 4, she observed that it had acquired scratches along the numerous trips as she, too, had acquired scars from her personal journey.

In some ways, JH seemed to resemble Benjamin because they were both college graduates. But I think the similarities are superficial. For one, there existed a world of difference in how they approached life. Benjamin was jaded and rebelling-for-the-sake-of-rebellion (hahaha. That was the 1960s anyway. We stood for anti-establishment…), while JiHoo was motivated and willing to work with the "patriarchal world" she found herself in.

And then there was the music. The Graduate is connected to Simon and Garfunkel’s The Sound of Silence. The song was actually released a few years earlier but it was recycled for the movie. The theme is loneliness and alienation and it fitted well with Benjamin’s coming-of-age angst. IIRC, it was played a few times: in the beginning of the movie when we see Benjamin and his suitcase at the airport, in the middle of the movie when he was having the sexual affair with Elaine’s mother, and at the ending scene when he and Elaine were sitting uncomfortable together in the bus.

In BTISMFL however, there’s this same melancholic music played whenever SH and JH were together. I haven’t the time to look for the lyrics but I think the theme of the song is different. Instead of emphasizing the solitude and silence, it sings of companionship. In light of SH’s three contractual stipulations to take care of the house, pet and recyclables, it seems to be a fitting song.

When we parse through SH’s demands, we see that basically, he is only asking for a helpmate to help him bear life’s load. With JH’s appearance, however, he’s given something more. Yes, he does find a companion who’s a perfect match for him. But he also finds himself unwittingly changing and going outside of his usual routine and safe space to match SH in turn. He’s becoming a perfect match for HER needs, too.

Gotta ~~run~~ fly again. My witch's broomstick is getting a lot o fmileage before Halloween. See you Friday?

Tagging only a few @alekaonu @YourHighness . @staygold @nearsea(where are you?) @bebe1989

xxPeepsxx · October 23, 2017

I can only say that this was a VERY, VERY, VERY lovely episode.

Watch it with subs yourself. I won't spoil it anymore for you.

lavender2love · October 23, 2017

@packmule3.... YOU ARE HERE.... SO SO HAPPY'

YOU'RE GIFTING US WITH A LONG POSt....MUAHSZZZZZ !!

Get back to you later. So much to digest.

SO LOVELY ... !!

nubianlegalmind · October 23, 2017

On 10/20/2017 at 4:24 PM, ddeokbokkii said:

Ah!, I'm guessing that you're not Asian. I think it's time for someone to explain this bit
about Asian culture. Especially to those people who are not familiar with it. Most Asian
families are very traditional and conservative. For an unrelated man and woman to live
under the same roof before marriage is considered taboo in Asian culture. In Western
countries, it's common for couple to living-in together before marriage. But, this is a big
"no no" in most Asian countries. Asian families are very strict against these type of living
arrangement. This is the very reason why he proposed to her the fake marriage, so they can
continue living under the same roof together. I hope this helps those of you who are not
familiar with Asian culture to understand some of the thing that going on in this drama.

Her friend(Ho Rang - I think) that living with her boyfriend, I don't think her family know that

she is living-in with her boyfriend. I could be wrong, but I doubt it.

Actually, I am familiar with Asian culture, and even in a lot of American cultures, "shacking" or "co-habitating" is looked down upon. I was just pointing out the fact that the father seemed okay with it when it was his son clearly doing it, irresponsibly at that, but was beside himself with his daughter in that arrangement. I was really getting at the sexism and misogyny, which unfortunately seems to be globally acceptable, even though consequences says otherwise. I am African-American, and despite what is trendy in society, my parents would have a total meltdown if they found out I was living with someone of the opposite sex.

lavender2love · October 23, 2017

PREVIEW ...... !!!!

EARLIER SCENES

nubianlegalmind · October 23, 2017

On 10/21/2017 at 1:10 AM, Lmangla said:

tried to go back a few pages to find out who it was that mentioned how sweet it was that the dad sat there with bags of buns waiting outside her uni and i would have to agree with that poster that it was really sweet. and thats what strikes me about the family. because it isn't a melo, this is not as black and white. just like real life. hahahaha... and even though he is quite patriarchal, he dreamed of her becoming a lawyer (something that tends to be more male dominated). instead, she chooses literature (which usually has more females studying that subject). so he didn't think that because she is a girl, she can't do law. instead, he dreamed big for his child. of course, she had her own dreams and so chose her own way. but it is not like he cut off relationship with her or that she is no longer welcome at his home because she made her own path. are they disappointed? maybe. but parents are people too and they too have aspirations and dreams for their kids right?

You know, you may be on to something here. I never thought about the fact that maybe, just maybe the father is so hard on her so she won't need a man. Patriarchy always puts women in a position of need where men are concerned, thus they are at a disadvantage. Maybe her father wanted her to be more successful so that she would never need a man to help her, or provide for her. That would be awesome if that is where the writers are going with this strained father-daughter relationship! And yes, being a writer is hard, you really have to get lucky. And in her case, you also have to be willing to turn the other cheek on a lot of unfair situations. Great point chingu!

Dramanoona · October 23, 2017

Ahh...a mother's love.

OK. The ending scene caused a waterfall.

allegramente · October 23, 2017

Having a bit of jet lag with the more polished forum... My, my. Time flies.

I like it that they don't make light of marriage, unlike many "cohabitation/contract marriage" dramas. They go with their eyes wide open with a refreshing "let's make this work" mentality.

I like the mother-daughter "showdown" between Ji-Ho and Mum. Ji-Ho thinks they only need her father's blessing and put aside Mum's feeling on the matter. Unconsciously, she behaves like the "patriarchal" system she despises. While Se-Hee, an only child whose mother is constantly on the edge trying to appease this father-son and their tempers, seems to understand Mum better (and he does take his mother's words seriously, thus the marriage).

I have been holding back with this drama, waiting to see it passing the first quarter mark, first four episodes. Oh well. After episode five, I am in. For it ups the stakes for all involved in an unassuming manner.

So, hello fellow viewers in this thread!

penelop3 · October 23, 2017

51 minutes ago, xxPeepsxx said:

I can only say that this was a VERY, VERY, VERY lovely episode.

Watch it with subs yourself. I won't spoil it anymore for you.

Thank you for the translations! Me personally don't mind spoilers.. but watching whole eps with sub makes a difference of course.

It was a very touching letter. I'm really happy for JH - she found out how much her mom loved her.

I guess it's difficult for her mom to openly express her love to JH. She was also overshadowed by the father, she could only love JH in silence.

And how kind and gentle SH was towards JH, despite his stoicism and his logical thinking. I'm really glad these two found each other.

plappi · October 23, 2017

Ep6 prewiew

rembrandtz_5e20 · October 23, 2017

2 hours ago, xxPeepsxx said:

SeHee:

Your tears, are they not stopping?

Then, let's go together.

Because it's okay even if you cry, go with me.

I'll be beside (you).

JiHo:

I thought it was something easy... marriage.

Something that was beneficial to both you and me.

But somehow, it was a meeting of hearts.

A difficult thing... we've started (it).

Thank you so much for the translations!

It's odd that one could be so moved by what SH said, given how robotic he was. But for SH who hates to lie, if he says something, you know he means it 100%.

I have no doubt he will be the pillar for JH from this point onwards. He gave back her scripts and gave her a reason to stay in Seoul, and he will be unwavering in supporting her to achieve her dream. That, is a million times more romantic than any kdrama hugs and kisses can be.

LOVE this show!

Edited October 23, 2017 by bebebisous33
quoted video- please remove this next time

lavender2love · October 23, 2017

45 minutes ago, packmule3 said:

Tagging @CamelKnight and @lavender2love. Both your shout-outs are difficult to ignore. I was at London Heathrow typing this but had to wait till I got home to post for the pics. Sorry to keep you two hanging.

It’s the cinematography, not so much the script, which I find appealing in this drama. Aside from showing what the characters SEE around them, the camera also reveals what they FEEL inside. It's a very subjective camera in the sense that it explores the consciousness of the protagonists through its lens.

Take for instance, the scene when SaeHee was interviewed by JiHoo’s dad about his job. The close-up of SH’s face amplified his changing facial expressions as his brain processed the cues JH had pre-warned him about her father. His face reminded me of a computer program: there was input of data (JiHoo’s three flags) and output of reaction (his behavior modification). lol. Was this how you proposed to your wife, @CamelKnight?

Combine that hilarious scene with his earlier failure to understand JH’s dad’s description of the crab soybean stew as an invitation to eat heartily, and the viewers would GET a real sense of SH’s character that wasn’t written in words. There was a SUBCONTEXT -- at least to me. His actions and reactions are symptomatic of a person with a mild form of autism or a high-functioning autism commonly known as Asperger. But I’m not here as a psychologist….

Typically in dramas, the thoughts and emotions of the characters are revealed through the dialogues and voiceovers. But in BTIMFL, the spoken words, and more importantly UNSPOKEN words between SaeHee and JiHoo, are highlighted by the VISUALS. Little details, e.g., the facial expressions, the landscape, the background, the props, and the lighting, capture the internal tension and the awkwardness of the characters. The visuals are important because when one character is literal-minded, like SH, the pictures/props can convey his intent and meaning in a way that his words can’t.

Thank you for your insightful post @packmule3. As usual so detailed and interesting.

As per Soompi rule, Ill put the rest in spoiler for further reference

WOW ...... you're travelling again ? From London ? DAEBAK .... !!!

Spoiler

From Episode 1.

aeHee’s strategic location in front of poster made him look comical, like a reindeer with antlers. His visual would correspond to JiHo’s musing later on. On the bus, she reflected that SH’s nonsense was exactly what she needed after her embarrassing discovery of her one-sided crush. In a way, she regained

SaeHee’s strategic location in front of poster made him look comical, like a reindeer with antlers. His visual would correspond to JiHo’s musing later on. On the bus, she reflected that SH’s nonsense was exactly what she needed after her embarrassing discovery of her one-sided crush. In a way, she regained her sanity with his insane comparison of feline and human neocortexes.

On the other hand, when JiHo stood up to take her leave, the poster of an enlarged bracelet with a doggie bone lucky charm became a pet collar around her neck.

I believe that her visual here was a foreshadowing of her role in SH’s life. lol. Nooo, she wouldn’t transform into a house pet. But she was a vulnerable creature that SH wouldn’t shelter, protect and care for in his home like his Kitty.

BTW, calling his pet cat Kitty was one sign for me that SH was wired differently. He was literal-minded. His pet was a cat so why would he bother call it by any other name? Same with his numeric passcode 0101* -- lol. I take it that this was the same passcode that his drunken roommate had forgotten so I understand now why he didn’t come to open the door for him. How could anybody forget a simple binary passcode? There are only 16 possible combinations.

From Episode 2

She left the wedding party partly to escape the mini-reunion of Seoul National University alums and partly to go to her script meeting. Behind her, the bus shed glass was clear except for a ghostly residual of an old poster. Her friend Ho-Rang followed her and gave her a pep talk on writing.

To me, the glass wall of the bus shed symbolized her career as a screenwriter. Since graduation, there was nothing TANGIBLE to show for her efforts, except a trace here and there, because she had been a ghostwriter all the time.

From Episode 3

She sat under the poster of 10 murderers. People were looking at her as if she was a murderer…or a demented person because she had been walking in her pajamas.

he poster of railroad tracks leading to infinity was representative of her feelings. She was tired of endless troubles in the cold city and home sounded good to her at that time.