[Drama 2022/2023] The Interest of Love/Understanding of Love, 사랑의 이해

[jayakris]

7 hours ago, xmochix said:

This drama is seriously depressing as hell! Ugh 

 

You said it.  It is one of the most depressing dramas I have ever watched (and I have watched a lot of dramas).

 

Nothing negative happened (well, nothing much happened at all) in Ep 14 till the very end, but one felt like crying through the whole episode.

 

Plus, this Ep 14 was probably the slowest episode I have seen in any drama, ever, too.  Every scene was dragged out with pointless camera shots, hardly any conversation, depressing music and the whole works.  A total waste of time today, watching it.

[backstreetboysfan]

Here are the ratings for Episode 14! .

 

 

 

“Strangers Again” Ratings Climb To New All-Time High As “The Interest Of Love” Heads Into Final Week

Meanwhile, JTBC’s “The Interest of Love” remained relatively stable ahead of the final week of its run. With just two episodes left to go, the romance drama scored an average nationwide rating of 3.2 percent.

 

https://www.soompi.com/article/1565211wpp/strangers-again-ratings-climb-to-new-all-time-high-as-the-interest-of-love-heads-into-final-week

 

[forumsoomp]

2 hours ago, lucia704 said:

Soo Young drives me mad. She is mentally ill, torturing her parents and Sang Soo, showing no character development. What SY says to SS is always vague, abstract, and blank. How the hell SS is drawn to her. Living with someone with a complicated innerthought like SY is truly tiring, and stressful. I love the straightforward conversations between SS and Mikyung, which touches my heart. Somehow, I wish SS comes back to MK.

Same thoughts here. From start if SS & SY do love each other then they should fight till the end to protect their love but not complicate it by deceiving & misleading JH & MK on with false hopes to the extend of SY accepting ring & going to bed with JH if it wasnt love but out of pity.  Why did SS went ahead to start a relationship with MK if his heart is still with SY, he could have rejected MK & wait for SY?  SS & SY has to be accountable for their own foolishness to cause hurt to both JH & MK, and make them suffer. Both JH & MK are innocent, they never cause harm to SY & SS, thus it's not fair that SS & SY should have a happy ending, they should be responsible for breaking 2 hearts due to their own selfishness to create & mislead one-sided love.

[nrllee]

Ep14

 

What can I say?  This ep should be titled “The LONG (and PAINFUL) goodbye”.  

 

I had to fast forward some segments - the pained, angsty pining looks… the sobbing… it was a dreary watch.  All the while I am screaming inside, “it didn’t need to be this way!”  
 

Did MK really flip heads on the coin?  I thought she flipped tails.  But good on her for having the dignity to say goodbye for real.  It was never going to work anyway.  At least in their circumstances, they talked.  Painful though it was, at the very least they were completely honest with each other.  I can’t say the same for SY and JH.  She left him hanging.  She never explained well at all.  She just made him think she was a b**** who toyed with men and slept around.  It’s as if she decided that if all the men thought she was like that, she may as well just prove them right.  That’s her bizarre logic.

 

I cannot understand how anyone (writer nim I am looking at you for your warped depiction of love) can think, “you know what?  I can’t bring myself to break up…so I’ll just sleep with someone else so they can break up with me.”   Huh??  That’s just cowardly.  And SY continues in her cowardice.  She repeats the same mistake she pulled with JH. Say goodbye properly for crying out loud!  SS deserves that much.  Honesty.  She strings him along with her vagaries and cryptic replies.  There’s first snow…and we all know what that signifies.  Lifting his hopes up.  She says he always comes and finds her anyway when he asked if he could call her again.  She leaves him with no hope of any closure by just disappearing like that.  Did she take his plant?  She should’ve just left it behind.  Does she expect him to head to TongYeong and search high and low to find her?  Is that her expectation?  She’s such a diva I have no words.  She’s selfish to the core.  Everything is all about her.  Although she somehow thinks her actions are beneficial to others because “they are better off without me”.    Her lack of self awareness beggars belief.  She leaves a trail of devastation everywhere she goes.  People left with no closure.  Just hanging by threads which she stitched up in the first place.

 

No preview for last 2 eps.  I don’t really care anymore if SS gets back together with SY anymore.  She’s bad news.  SS should just move on from her.  I would like at least some positivity in the last 2 eps please Writer nim, whatever it is.  The “life” and “love” that you’ve depicted for 14 eps leaves everyone devoid of hope?  It’s just one big long painful journey.  Surely that’s not the message you want to leave with your viewers?  

[Shimmery-summer]

Arriteeee so finally on episode 13, so as it seemed she wouldn't sleep with him and will pull a farce was proven right. Episode 13 wasn't good like before but still not bad. (This comment has most number of times word 'shameless' used than I did in any other comment before)

 

 

So firstly I am still so irritated with ghost like ex mi gyeong. Enough with her dramas, just stop clinging onto the guy and let him go. Like how much more clingy and manipulative you want to get. I dislike the fact that she uses public situations to coax her targets into doing things of her choice, like when she and sy were standing in the corridor and mr ma is telling them about mr yang's suspension mk keeps passing small remarks to tease and scare sy about ss's future, after sy and jh outburst drama when mr lee asks, everything is fine in their relationship, she holds sang su's arm to prove they are together. Honestly how much more shameless you can get to still cling on to him and then again using public fear to convince him. And I don't even want to get started on her demeaning comments on sy outside the bank when sang su leaves for training. Mk approaches him and says so much nonsense, like what an opportunist to use this moment to degrade her opponent, 

 

 

Mk: 'Why are you so shocked?, Why do you look so blown away? How could you do that to me for someone like her? Why are we the ones who have to feel this way? Do you still like her? Do you still like Su-yeong? Are you really okay with what happened today? Say something! 

 

SS: Mi-gyeong. Later… Later.

 

Seriously she knows he loved her even before mk came, and she is still asking why he is shocked. And I can't with her comment, 'how can you like someone like her', she is character-shaming sy just like everyone at work, and let's be honest, is she such a newborn that she doesn't feel this whole happened after her visit to sy and her constant crying and wailing before everyone and her constant threats? She didn't even feel it was out of character to happen at this time? Then ss has to beg her to leave him alone. I was more surprised she's not even seeing the pathetic state of the guy she claims she 'loves', he is miserable but she is still torturing him with her own princess issues, everything that matters to her is just herself, a typical selfish person. 

 

 

 

Then not enough now she heads out to gp to act high and mighty, like sorry woman, you were the one going around threatening, emotionally blackmailing everyone about the future, just that you didn't know sy carries a self detonation button, now you are acting like a saint and spirtual soul lecturing others on their bad deeds. I really like when GP gives her, 'ss and sy won't be together so be happy' remark. And then reminds her how she even called him to share it with him, and add to how she was on threatening spree using mr yang as an example. Then her gall to go and RickRoll'D shame sy in the uni hall on her morals about dating x, leading on y and sleeping with z. I seriously don't get what right she held to confront sy after her past meeting?

 

 

 

I really feel mk is the most shameless person around. She decides what she wants and works to attain it, and does everything in the process, if it's slipping out of hands she goes bonkers and starts another slew of efforts to keep it with her at whatever cost. I find her so shameless that she was going around emotionally blackmailing sy, prolly threatening her, clearly threatening ss, specially her last meeting with sooyong which meant whatever in her head but was enough to trigger both sy and gp into a nasty plan, and then she expects nothing will happen? People won't do anything either good or bad as a reaction? And when she gets the reaction she again hops around. Her audacity to come back at sy was something else. She really didn't remember her previous visit and then her stupid, 'I tried to like you', nonsense really b. this is what liking is to you to, throw hand me downs at her, arrange needling dinners, visit her the day her mom had an accident to give her clothes? Which she has to resell later

 and didn't even say a word of complain to her. Really like it when sy makes a b.tch face and fires back at her,' don't like me'. 

 

 

 

Now GP, I still don't get what his nonsense convo meant with ss when he tells him after the drama that you and I are same, we did same to mk bla bla. I mean the comparison is way off. Quite rude of the writers to keep GP's intentions murky for the viewers whether he did it for ss or mk or.... Mainly what didn't like was that it seemed he had a grudge against ss? That would make gp very unlikeable person.

 

 

 

I have to say I didn't mind sy being rude to her mom but as long as it was because of mom getting back with dad and not because she thinks she is poor. Sy's dad is a pos and he deserves no sympathy, infact I still don't think sy should be talking to him. If i am not wrong he actually abandons his family and leaves them behind looking for him while he goes and pursues his 'love'? And his family goes around frantically searching for him. Isn't that it? Then when her brother locates him, he sends sy his address and right after that an hour later he meets an accident. That's why sy hates her dad and hates her mom for accepting that garbage human and she is actually right.

 

 

If we see her father tells her that he came back because of regret because of what happened. I mean isn't it sad that her dad is telling her that he came back leaving his 'lover' to his ' abandoned family' because he regretted the outcomes, but it sounds like as if he sacrificed his love to be with his first family because of everything that happened not because he is supposed to 'be' with them and because he 'loved' them, his genuine love is for the other one, he is here due to what happened and because of the shame he earned from people due to his actions. Sy is right in ignoring him and he is the prime reason she is so effed up in head.

 

 

 

Sang su has shown immense growth in his character since last few episodes and is atleast better than rest of them now. I didn't really like the wording of his apology as he took entire blame on himself, prolly he didn't know the schemes mk made to clear her way to date him, how mk had befriended sy beforehand to remove her as a threat from dating ss and later things she did to keep him with her. I really didn't care much about that apology and some of it didn't even make sense to me like when he said he used her for selfish purpose, like where did he even do that?

 

 

All I needed to hear from ss was that, 'he shouldn't have gotten with her when he wasn't into her, but then she herself says she is okay with 1pc, then she doesn't even ask him and two days later kisses him publicly, she practically didn't even give him time to think more, she was always forcing her way into his life, that's her fault too and also to date a guy who says he has 1pc for her and if she is dating him and he is not even giving her 1pc, is she not a grownup woman to realize this is wrong and break up herself then to wait things to go disastrous. But anyways sang su was at fault too as he also was a pansy who couldn't break up himself and took her to meet his mom so she will initiate the breakup but she took it in an opposite sense, so definitely he needed to apologize for that and that he cheated on her without a breakup. But if he didn't have any sy and wanted to quit, mk would have gone same cray. She was really driving sang su to suicide with her ghostlike clinginess.

Also breaking the car??

 

 

Now sy, as such I don't feel sorry for what happened to jh because of his outburst, because of his constant loserish behavvior since he moved in with sy, him being a moron bad mouthing sy before his classless sidechick, but no matter how I look at it, it makes no logical sense as to why she did this to him. So sy's plan is to pretend sleep with gp to make both jh and ss hate on her and leave her alone. So now after she has executed the cheating part how did she plan to disclose it to jh and ss?

 

 

 

She tells jh at home that I told you to discuss after work, like woman if you wanted that why you didn't first head back home in the morning so that the drama would have happened at home? Like to provoke him she goes straight to work. She had that b..tch face on at work when she heads out in the corridor after avoiding ss like she knows something will happen. Lets say jh hadn't pulled this sh..t and confronted her at home, I want to know how two of them were planning on informing sang su on it? If their original plan wasn't what jh did at work what other plan they had to defame her and to disclose cheating to ss?

 

 

 

 Jh is pathetic but writers used his outburst to add spice to show and to try and erase any sympathy for him

 

 

Two days back jh gave her ring and she accepted it. It makes no sense to drop this bomb on him even if she suspects him of cheating without talking to him at home. If he refuses and all then one could understand her going to extremes or maybe if she saw him sleeping with someone and decided to pull this, but there's nothing. The only reasoning comes up is that she doesn't want to directly dump him as she knows he has low self esteem, hardly any motivation to move on in life on his own, if she will dump him he will think he was pathetic bla bla, and give up on studies bla bla so it's better to sacrifice herself for saving his personal pride by showing that their breakup happened not because he was incapable etc but because she was a b..tch. and that's the reason for that dialogue in the rain 'you are a b..tch'. Still makes no sense because dumping him this way is way more emotionally, mentally disturbing for him. If normal breakup means losing self esteem, quitting studies etc then that is his problem that he treats his life so sh..ty, not hers. We are shown the guy has just some empty pride on him to show off and this is also the reaosn for his outburst at workplace, the hurt male pride.

 

 

He deserves no sympathy for getting fired like some coworkers showed, he was an ahole and deserved it, even if she is a b..ch she did so much for you, and then he is still at home and shamelessly keeps asking, ' what will happen to us?' And she has to tell him, find a place, like he was afraid of breakup only because he will lose a roof on his head and his lame comment, 'I shouldn't have done it at workplace'.

 

 

 

Jh initially wasn't a moocher. It also doesn't make sense for her to do this as each time he wanted to break up and leave she keeps forcing him back into life, like let him go when wanted to. Sy spoiled him too, if he's acting irresponsible like not cleaning up after himself, not contributing much in expenses, or she sees him slacking off etc etc it was sy's job to tell him off, but instead she keeps babysitting him, spoiling him till he turns into a fulltime moocher.

 

 

 

As a grownup adult didn't she know her attitude towards him is wrong and is turning him into a freeloader, and if she realizes now and wants to cut him off, won't she have the decency to do it in a respectful way. There's no way his attitude at bank could be defended but he definitely atleast deserved to be told she doesn't want to go on with him also given that it's her who kept forcing him to stay with her and that she had a hand in his lax moocher behavior.

 

 

 

This was very poor writing. Btw seeing how depsite her breakup shock he was still trying to get back with her, was just wondering how hard it would have been to get rid of him if she broke in normal way. The guy had the guts to mention sun jae sarcastically, like no shame, that girl was so disrespectful to his gf and he didn't do anything, any other gf in sy's place would have slapped her face red but he thinks his gf has to take it kindly and to him it's her fault if she took it wrong way. Also he doesn't even know what he wants in life, if father is ill he gives up on everything, if a person supports him in such bad times he turns into a leech, with no sense of responsibility, he really thinks for years he will keep flunking the test and she will keep tolerating it feeding him and all? And if she leaves him he again gives up on studies, cries, screams and all? where he wants to end up at with all these sh..tty behaviors? Even before he had run away multiple times, this is what he was all about, seriously if not for sy who would date such clown? His approach to life is so crass even if his bank behavior is ignored. Also can't he study for exams in his hometown, why he has to be in seoul for it.

 

 

 

Really hated when she runs after him in rain to lecture him on studying and all, I mean just let him be, at that point I wanted someone to punch her for her fake care and usual leading-on behavior. 

 

 

 

I don't feel so angry at sy's character because it doesn't even feel real to me at this point, it's like wasting anger on a character's actions which aren't close to reality which is sad as in initial episodes till mid of show sy was written as a very realistically. She is a mentally sick person at this point.

 

 

My fav lines and scenes from ep 13 were:

 

1) When sy comes back home after jh did that at work and he is still at home and says, 'Did you think I'd be gone?'

 

Like if there was an award for being shamelss, he would win.

 

 

2) Mk goes to subbranch and says to gp: 'I really didn't want to ask you this.'

 

And GP says, 'Then don't'.

 

 

3) GP telling sangsu over drinks, 'Sorry to disappoint you, but there's no philosophical reason as to why I sleep with women.'

 

 

4) Gyeong pil after getting punched by jh and outside talking to ss, checking his injury in selfie cam. The guy knows what matters the most to him in life, his looks.

 

 

5) Gyeong pil telling sang su after getting punched by him, 'Jeez, why did you hit me where I got punched earlier?'

 

 

 

[jayakris]

18 minutes ago, Shimmery-summer said:

I don't feel so angry at sy's character because it doesn't even feel real to me at this point, it's like wasting anger on a character's actions which aren't close to reality which is sad as in initial episodes till mid of show sy was written as a very realistically. She is a mentally sick person at this point.

 

Okay, thanks for that explanation ... I was wondering how you were still pouring it on MK (though it was very much justified) and not saying anything about SY who has now turned out to be even worse than MK, and all of us are so frustrated at whatever the heck that selfish and self-centered mental basket-case is doing.

 

You are right.  We should just give up on SY.  She is no longer real, and is indeed mentally sick now.  No point in even getting upset about her!

 

17 minutes ago, Shimmery-summer said:

My fav lines and scenes from ep 13 were:

 

3) GP telling sangsu over drinks, 'Sorry to disappoint you, but there's no philosophical reason as to why I sleep with women.'

I also liked that line.  The translator did a good job with the "Sorry to disappoint you" there.  That is not what was said in Korean, but it perfectly captured the line delivery.  Well done!

[Shimmery-summer]

1 hour ago, jayakris said:

Okay, thanks for that explanation ... I was wondering how you were still pouring it on MK (though it was very much justified) and not saying anything about SY who has now turned out to be even worse than MK, and all of us are so frustrated at whatever the heck that selfish and self-centered mental basket-case is doing.

 

You are right.  We should just give up on SY.  She is no longer real, and is indeed mentally sick now.  No point in even getting upset about her!

I still don't dislike sy more than mk. I am kind of indifferent towards sy, started to dislike her character from ep 7 or 8, but still dislike mk more. I dunno am very confused about this whole nonsense and sy. How can you dump someone like this without a convo unless there is a valid reason. She is a mentally sick person and deserves a forever lonely life. Writers did a horrible job, they started the show with such realistic characters and now they ruined sy's character like this. The appeal of show has been destroyed for me, the realism which drew us in is gone. This is first time I have seen writers doing an extremely great, rare and realistic job but going 180 degrees in same show. They did it for ratings?

 

 

Also hate it how writers tried to manipulate viewers into justifying sy's action by showing jh's anger outburst. Yes he is disgusting for what he did but why she didn't tell him before that. She seems to have a God complex, tries to control things but when they get too heavy to handle, she destroys everything. She bites more than she can chew.

 

3 hours ago, jayakris said:

"Sorry to disappoint you"

 

Oh thanks, I wonder what original phrase meant. 

 

 

 

 

[jayakris]

26 minutes ago, Shimmery-summer said:

3 hours ago, jayakris said:

"Sorry to disappoint you"

Oh thanks, I wonder what original phrase meant. 

 

He said 근데 어쩌냐 (geunde eojjeonya?) which means, "but what to do?" or "but what can we do?"... But "Sorry to disappoint you" is what he pretty much meant, the way he said and acted it!

 

I have become a big fan of the Gyeong Pil actor.  The guy has nailed that role.  So many expressions on his face that never stops acting.  All of that perfectly fits the role too.

[Latte_Anyday]

Ugh Su Yeong is the problem here. She obviously need a lot of time on her own to heal and self-reflect, while Sang Su need to let her go, move on. He deserves better..

    Mi Gyeong during her break-up scene looked like she was dressed for mourning ha-ha. As expected, she puts her pride first LoL. Tellin' Sang Su he basically let a good catch as her go LoL geez.

    This drama is a cure for insomniacs I tell ya LoL. The pacing is so sloOooooWWww..... and gosh the many pauses between sentences the leads do when they speak is sleep inducing ahahah! Not to mention the muted colors, scenes, the mellow ost (yawns) LoL.

    Last 2 ep. how will this end? Ga Young's real pretty in the checkered blazer when she dropped off Jong Hyeon's stuff.

[Shimmery-summer]

4 hours ago, jayakris said:

 

He said 근데 어쩌냐 (geunde eojjeonya?) which means, "but what to do?" or "but what can we do?"... But "Sorry to disappoint you" is what he pretty much meant, the way he said and acted it!

 

I have become a big fan of the Gyeong Pil actor.  The guy has nailed that role.  So many expressions on his face that never stops acting.  All of that perfectly fits the role too.

When I was writing on ep13 I added this comment but prolly mistakenly removed it while editing it, when jh and sy are talking in rain, he says something like, you thought I am pathetic something something, the translation said pathetic but I felt the word he used in korean was 'beggar'. Like geoji something.

 

 

Also as you know korean I am assuming you might familiar with korean culture, do you think the class difference btw sy and ss was over emphasized by writers, as in people might look down on marrying someone from lower socioeconomic class but it's still workable and the drama exaggerated it on sy and ss or is it true? Also I found it confusing that if sy and ss date the class difference would stand out then why it wasn't noticeable to bank folks or anyone from society when mk and ss dated when she is many times more rich, instead ss was praised for picking her. But it looked it was portrayed that if sy had picked ss she would have been looked down on by her colleagues and gossiped about for scoring a better guy but ss was never gossiped about for finding a rich gf rather told to value her a lot. It was weird that everything that was shown that was messed up with the leads was happening with mr yuk. Like him having a rich wife who aided his career, same being used to lure in ss, mr yuk cheating then the cheating going on at bank. Is it such a shame for a senior bank clerk to marry an oyster restaurant owner's daughter who is a bank teller with a high school diploma? I felt exaggeration but then I am not sure. 

 

 

Also why was sy so gossiped about in the first place at her workplace to the extent that people from other branch also gossiped on her even before the video incident. From what we see she was a super hardworking employee who kept it to herself and was reserved. Women hated her as she was pretty, men hated her as she was pretty but not sleeping with them, as a result they all gossiped about her, add to it her education and obscure background made them look down on her, and because of her weak background she became an easy target for them to bully her over the things that annoyed them about her, which are her looks. So they spread extremely sick rumors about her character. I mean is it also real? Probably at this point she was just a punching bag for every frustrated employee at her bank. Men in this show working at bank were so nasty so nasty. Sometimes I felt sy's silence was a source of encouragement to them. Each time she would smile as if it's nothing, like it won't kill her if she would warn them once for all.

 

[petalsoft]

I know many people are angry with Ahn Su-Yeong but she continues to keep having to prove herself at work and finding love. Love shouldn't be an exhausting process BUT she has a man that retreated into depression when he couldn't pass a test and a male lead that couldn't muster the courage to tell her his feelings from the beginning.  Loving someone should be fun, exciting, hopeful and when she took the second male leads hand in the rain she embraced it.  Only to be knocked down again by his nature to retreat when he fails.  Ha Sang-Su obviously cares about her. But he's lacked the courage, for years, in telling her  and when the time came, he failed, hesitated and she saw it all.  Her hope for love fell into the same cesspool of her abusive working conditions. IMO,  Ahn Su-Yeong  deserves our understanding when she's protecting herself.   Defense mechanisms are not evil, they are a means of protection. If any of the men could offer full love and support, don't we think Ahn Su-Yeong would have embraced it?  But things are more complicated and she's learned to survive and keep moving, even with all the disappointments.  Is that a way to live? It most certainly is for Ahn Su-Yeong  and that's something we should show empathy for instead of our judgment. 

[Hong Banjang]

This show reminds me of my toxic relationship with another JTBC show, Nevertheless.

Why do JTBC shows have such needlessly complicated storylines? Unhinged clueless characters, people who have massive attachment issues and due to them other people suffer, very little explanation is provided behind their actions or intentions and then the ending is rushed - everything falls into place miraculously and the main leads overcome all difficulties (which are excerberated due to their own deficient personalities and lack of communication).

tvN shows give viewers something to root for, something relaxing, JTBC shows only add to my frustration.

Anyway, I didn't want to rant about the story or the characters today, so I thought I'll rant about the channel. Because I'm tired of saying the same things about Su Yeong, Mi Kyoung, Sang Su and now Gyeong Pil is added to that list! The only healthy relationship in this show is between Sang Su & his mother, that's it!

[Shimmery-summer]

4 hours ago, petalsoft said:

when the time came, he failed, hesitated and she saw it all. 

 

But then when he tries to explain himself after restaurant hesitation incident which he said just took few seconds but she refuses to listen. If I am not wrong when they get locked in store room they have a very clear convo where she still turns him down because of her family background and by that time she had already for no good reason had starred dating the guard as well. What my point is that sang su does come out clear and decisive and she still turns him down, she actually says much early on in a monologue even if he hadn't hesitated she still wouldn't have accepted him. As of guard she had accepted him but he hadn't moved in yet and it was just 2 days of seeing each other when storeroom convo happens, she could have ended it then rather than what she eventually did. And frankly when she brings that nasty pos bf, hate the character how he destroyed her repute at work whilst him just being a loser, he was already in a state of depression, so a guy who wasn't good enough to take care of his own emotions how can he take care of her. But still she was making an effort to help a human which failed. But I think ss doesn't deserve hesitation blame because it had been long back since he cleared it up and even she apologizes to him for acting rude in the storeroom. Her mental baggage regarding her mom's profession makes her think she is less than him, she fears telling him about them will make him leave her and further look down on her. 

 

Was just observing that the guard left her twice and each time he did he sort of stormed out of the scene, acting rashly, aggressive and hasty, was that behavior a foreshadowing of him again acting rash and storming into bank and the creating the scene and a hint on what kind of personality he has.

[nrllee]

5 hours ago, petalsoft said:

If any of the men could offer full love and support, don't we think Ahn Su-Yeong would have embraced it?

Err. I would think SS of all people tried to offer her full love and support.  She was just too quick to judge him for his one moment’s hesitation?  The point was, he weighed up his options at the traffic lights, then picked her?  He showed up in the end?  And he did apologize afterward didn’t he?  Yet she flat refused to accept it.  What’s more, she never gave him the real reason why she dumped him for the longest time.  She left him hanging.  And he was scratching his head wondering what he said or what he did to offend her?  She played all these games instead of giving it to him straight?  For a normal person, I would say there would always be moments where you doubt yourself or the relationship?  That’s just being human?  Her expectations of SS were set sky high?  And they had…err…one official movie date?  Is that even a realistic expectation of anyone?  And even in that one date, I could already tell she was toying with him?  What woman bluffs on her first date that she can’t make it and then laughs when she sees him squirm with disappointment - just for sport?  That’s just cruel?  She was projecting her own sense of self worth and making it out that it was his fault that the relationship didn’t take off?  If she expected SS to never hesitate, then she should’ve done the same with JH.  But she kept hesitating didn’t she?  And even now after everything that’s happened, and it would appear that they (SS and her) are starting over (from where they left off at the restaurant), she does it to him again?  Leaving him hanging.   No proper goodbye.  No clear explanation.  That’s why I am so hard on her.  She had these rigid rules she went by eg I don’t like undefined relationships.  Yet all her relationships thus far have been “undefined”.  She’s the queen of undefined relationships.   She’s never completely on board.  She expects the other party to commit in full but she never really does.  You can’t have it both ways.  If you want the other party to live by a certain set of rules, then you make sure you abide by them too.  Otherwise the rules don’t stand.  She destroys the sand castles she builds.  She acknowledges that.  She explains it away somehow by saying she’s afraid someone else will come by to destroy it so to circumvent this potentiality, she knocks it over first.  She doesn’t seem to care that in doing that she’s caused all this hurt to others in the process, because it wasn’t just her that built that sandcastle, other people had a hand in it too.  But in her little world, it’s population one.  Only she lives in it.  Others don’t factor into her action.  Not even her parents.  I can understand her being mad with her dad but why take it out on her mom?  And cut her off so completely that nobody knew she was her mom?  That was cold and cruel.  
 

I am all for trying to empathize with her plight - the misogyny and workplace prejudices are uncalled for.  But she does herself no favours by deciding to just pretend to sleep with another workmate just so she can lob a grenade into all the intertwined relationships happening around her.  That’s on her.  She could’ve chosen to be honest and tell JH she wanted out, tell MK she didn’t really think their friendship would last, tell SS that she wasn’t keen on a relationship now.  But no.  She chose the most damaging way she could to end all the relationships because it was apparently too much effort for her to communicate all that.  That’s selfish in my books. 

[petalsoft]

1 hour ago, Shimmery-summer said:

 

But then when he tries to explain himself after restaurant hesitation incident which he said just took few seconds but she refuses to listen. If I am not wrong when they get locked in store room they have a very clear convo where she still turns him down because of her family background and by that time she had already for no good reason had starred dating the guard as well. What my point is that sang su does come out clear and decisive and she still turns him down, she actually says much early on in a monologue even if he hadn't hesitated she still wouldn't have accepted him. As of guard she had accepted him but he hadn't moved in yet and it was just 2 days of seeing each other when storeroom convo happens, she could have ended it then rather than what she eventually did. And frankly when she brings that nasty pos bf, hate the character how he destroyed her repute at work whilst him just being a loser, he was already in a state of depression, so a guy who wasn't good enough to take care of his own emotions how can he take care of her. But still she was making an effort to help a human which failed. But I think ss doesn't deserve hesitation blame because it had been long back since he cleared it up and even she apologizes to him for acting rude in the storeroom. Her mental baggage regarding her mom's profession makes her think she is less than him, she fears telling him about them will make him leave her and further look down on her. 

 

Was just observing that the guard left her twice and each time he did he sort of stormed out of the scene, acting rashly, aggressive and hasty, was that behavior a foreshadowing of him again acting rash and storming into bank and the creating the scene and a hint on what kind of personality he has.

The complexity of emotions she feels with working with a man she has a crush on, knowing she'll likely endure the most hate and gossip from the office and takes a greater chance then watches him  hesitate? She was hurt, angry and sad.  His explanation doesn't take away the pain she felt in that moment.  Why did  Ha Sang-Su  have one second of doubt? When she chastises him for not stepping in when he's seen her  abusive treatment, she notices. When he believes she's choosing and not understanding she's enduring is reflective in how different they are.   Ahn Su-Yeong is the one in this drama that took the most risk to find love and it hurt her.  She doesn't have that same freedom to put all those things into question because of the repercussions.  And Jeong Jong-Hyeon keeps failing her and offering her no trust in care.   It's unfair to judge Ahn Su-Yeong based on what we'd do but feeling her pain and hopelessness as she's trying to figure things out is what's heartbreaking. 

38 minutes ago, nrllee said:

That’s selfish in my books. 

Yes, the one power she has to give herself the love and care she needs. She certainly should be selfish.  She's suffered years of abuse from powerful men and has seen how many of her co-workers stood by and mocked her treatment, including Ha Sang-Su.  A relationship with Ha Sang-Su  was always going to be difficult because of her experience on the job and him seeing it all. When he finally stands up, they're both in relationships. Navigating an emotionally abusive work relationship when you're constantly being hurt by men is a huge emotional task to let things be. She does not have that luxury. All Ahn Su-Yeong wanted was someone that doesn't have to hesitate to be with her.  Someone that doesn't feel lost after they've failed an exam.  She wants the simple things and still can't get it.  I feel for her, even when she gets things wrong. 

[nrllee]

@petalsoft I will agree to disagree with you on the assessment of SY.  She can’t call others out for hesitating when she herself hesitates big time.  Why shouldn’t SS have a second of doubt?  Find me one person in this world who has never doubted in their entire life?  Her view of what love should be like is delusional.  It’s like she expects unflinching adoration that is akin to worship.  Maybe that’s why she had the nickname Goddess in the bank branch.  It’s unrealistic coming from her because she’s just as flawed as everyone else.  Actually if you watch the ep where she reflects on his hesitation, you will see that she realises that she bailed because she hesitated too.  She got scared about the commitment and ran.  But nowhere do you hear her apologise or explain that to SS.  She just let him believe that it was all his fault.
 

I don’t buy into her arguments that life’s so tough on her and so somehow it justifies her selfishness.  There are people I know who’ve experienced worse and still opted to continue to live in hope and choose to love rather than respond the way she does.  Hers is not the response to aspire to.  She opts for self protection at the expense of everyone around her and leaves a trail of destruction and hurt in her wake.  She probably needs some time in TongYeong to just rethink her whole view of life.  Reconnect with her family.  Maybe go back to art school or study again.  Forget about climbing the social ladder in the corporate world.  

[Shimmery-summer]

1 hour ago, petalsoft said:

The complexity of emotions she feels with working with a man she has a crush on, knowing she'll likely endure the most hate and gossip from the office and takes a greater chance then watches him  hesitate? She was hurt, angry and sad.  His explanation doesn't take away the pain she felt in that moment.  Why did  Ha Sang-Su  have one second of doubt? When she chastises him for not stepping in when he's seen her  abusive treatment, she notices. When he believes she's choosing and not understanding she's enduring is reflective in how different they are.   Ahn Su-Yeong is the one in this drama that took the most risk to find love and it hurt her.  She doesn't have that same freedom to put all those things into question because of the repercussions.  And Jeong Jong-Hyeon keeps failing her and offering her no trust in care.   It's unfair to judge Ahn Su-Yeong based on what we'd do but feeling her pain and hopelessness as she's trying to figure things out is what's heartbreaking. 

Yes, the one power she has to give herself the love and care she needs. She certainly should be selfish.  She's suffered years of abuse from powerful men and has seen how many of her co-workers stood by and mocked her treatment, including Ha Sang-Su.  A relationship with Ha Sang-Su  was always going to be difficult because of her experience on the job and him seeing it all. When he finally stands up, they're both in relationships. Navigating an emotionally abusive work relationship when you're constantly being hurt by men is a huge emotional task to let things be. She does not have that luxury. All Ahn Su-Yeong wanted was someone that doesn't have to hesitate to be with her.  Someone that doesn't feel lost after they've failed an exam.  She wants the simple things and still can't get it.  I feel for her, even when she gets things wrong. 

No, I see your point, though I don't share same opinion. Actually regarding sy not choosing to date ss, I also understood that, actually lot of time has passed since show started and I have forgotten so many reasonings I had which made me understand sy back then, that's why a rewatch is needed but ep 13, 14 ruined it that I lost interest in rewatch. I remember now that how ss used to stand around as a silent spectator, and I remember when I wrote comments on ep 5,6,7,8 I used to call him scum bag and douch bags etc for his silence and I felt that at that time in her opinion it was best to not date him because dating her would mean standing upto abusive colleagues for her which either he wouldn't want to or she wouldn't want him to do to avoid placing him in hard situations and effecting his promotion prospects. But it's also a fact if they started dating then colleagues would be forced to be mindful of what they say about her before ss and would have to give her some respect. Atleast male colleagues can't insult her before ss knowing she is his woman. 

 

Anyways, everyone will analyze the show differently the way it's written. But why I quoted you was to correct the point that SS was always hesitant, I think with regards to dating he did clarify himself fully, and she accepted it but also rejected him because of her personal reasons which were understandable. I just wanted to point this out that he had sorted this issue but she refuses again with a monologue confession that she would have still rejected him had he not hesitated and before she thinks that she had visited her mom so writers were showing lot of factors were stuck in her head to decide.

 

But all of it aside I really wonder that in korean work culture women who are harassed like her, do they have no way to respond harshly to abusers or take an action. Like in karaoke bar one mr lee touches her shoulder she silently sits, they tell her to grab drinks she silently sits and lot of times whem ma, lee and yuk would harass her. Even when they question her about dating jh at dinner she still smiles and says no. So like can't she tell them to eff off. Frankly, the thing I have hated most about her is her constant fake smiles. Also except that nice female employee all female colleagues were b...tches always badmouthing another female colleague behind her back for no reason. 

[Hong Banjang]

7 hours ago, nrllee said:

She’s the queen of undefined relationships.   She’s never completely on board.  She expects the other party to commit in full but she never really does.  You can’t have it both ways.  If you want the other party to live by a certain set of rules, then you make sure you abide by them too.  Otherwise the rules don’t stand.  She destroys the sand castles she builds.

She is somebody who'll destroy her sand castle, and then on a rainy evening, when she's on the bus, she'll ruminate and wonder 'I could have had him... But then I hurt him too much...'

Su Yeong & Sang Su's storyline has become too distasteful for me, personally. She spread rumours about sleeping with Sang Su's best friend. How does one move on from this? Everyone now thinks she slept with Gyeong Pil. Even if things get resolved and she starts dating Sang Su, it will still forever be weird.

Gyeong Pil doesn't deserve to be friends with Sang Su anymore, Sang Su should completely cut him off imo.

And regarding Jong Hyeon, no matter what he did, he didn't deserve the treatment he got. It's so cowardly, even ghosting is better than breaking up with someone like this. Su Yeong didn't just destroy her sand castle, she set fire to it and let others burn with it.

[jayakris]

19 hours ago, Shimmery-summer said:

When I was writing on ep13 I added this comment but prolly mistakenly removed it while editing it, when jh and sy are talking in rain, he says something like, you thought I am pathetic something something, the translation said pathetic but I felt the word he used in korean was 'beggar'. Like geoji something.

 

Yes, he did say 거지 같은 (geoji gateun) which literally means "like a beggar" because geoji is beggar, but the phrase is used for saying "useless" "worthless" "good-for-nothing" "loser" etc without implying the beggar aspect much.  Here he had said two things though, "(You thought) I was hanshim (한심), and geoji gatteun. Wasn't that why it was so?"... The first word means "pathetic".   Because he was speaking fast, there wasn't enough time for us to read long English translations, which may be why the subber dropped the second part and said "It is. I was pathetic. That's why you did this."  (The "It is" was not said.  And it wasn't a statement, as the intonation of what he says shows)

 

The last part is a statement said as a semi-question with the "chana?" at the end.  Somebody has told all these translators that English speakers never say these things as questions, so they make them statements.  For the life of me I cannot understand it.  English speakers can and do say some of these things as questions in such arguing conversations.  And it is no big deal for us to understand it in the original form itself.  But 4 out 5 times when something said as a question, they will make it a statement.  Here they even added an extra "It is" that was not even said.

 

I would have just translated it just as he said it.  "I was pathetic. A loser. Isn't that why?"    If more clarity is needed, maybe a "to you" can be added.  "I was pathetic.  A loser, to you.  Isn't that why?"

 

19 hours ago, Shimmery-summer said:

Also as you know korean I am assuming you might familiar with korean culture, do you think the class difference btw sy and ss was over emphasized by writers, as in people might look down on marrying someone from lower socioeconomic class but it's still workable and the drama exaggerated it on sy and ss or is it true?

Actually I am not a Korean. I am from the US (and of Indian origin) but had been in Korea over 15 years ago for 3 months as a visiting Engineering professor. I have then had brief trips many times, as I have a lot of friends and students there, and I absolutely love the country and the people.   In that process I taught myself Korean, as I got very interested in the language because of its history that predates later Indo-Germanic languages and Chinese.  The structure, style, and even words are very close to older (non-Hindi) Indian languages like in the Dravidian family (Tamil, Malayalam etc) which may even have come from Korean. Or the reverse. Or they may have all developed together before Sanskrit, Arabic, Persian and Chinese marginalized the languages in India and Asia to the east.  But none of this is fully established or fully rejected now by researchers.

 

Back to your question - I am no expert on the cultural issue you raise.  But my feeling is that there  is definitely class consciousness in the Korean society.  It is not based on religion, caste, groups, etc, like in other countries.  It is rather economics and education.  Business, job, salary, parents' economic background, etc, are very important.  But a particularly striking thing is the HUGE importance given to the college degree and even more strikingly, the University one studied in.  Being the alumnus of Seoul National University automatically puts you in a higher category.  Then a few other top universities like Korea Univ, Yonsei Univ etc (the famous S-K-Y group that I think was a theme in the drama Sky Castle).  The college alumni networks are very strong.  The senior/junior thing is real too; the seonbae/hubae automatic friendships from having gone to the same big university, that is.  The ones from Univs below the top-10 are in another lower category.  The 100 odd other Univs below top-25 are "unknown" and worthless for Koreans, it would seem.  Most are quite good though, if you look at the quality of education, but the reputation is a whole other thing.  With that backdrop, a high school diploma is a non-starter in Korea, and SY's issues have a lot to do with it.

 

The difference you noticed in how people responded to SS getting MK, and SY getting SS is probably not unrealistic.  I think the biggest reason for it would be their feeling that a high school grad has no business dating a college grad from a top Univ like SS is.  If SY was only a high school grad, but a daughter of a very wealthy businessman, nobody would fault her though.  Money, in the end, trumps everything in Korea too

 

Economic status and education come up big in marriage situations in Korea.  Higher education and Housing are quite expensive in Korea and parents routinely put roadblocks on alliances where things don't match.  The size and location of  the buildings or apartments your parents or you own, do come into the discussion very often.  Some of it is because of the reality of life there. A lot of money is needed to own real estate.  The dramas exaggerate a bit, but the issues are indeed real.  The young people know it too.  I have had students who are in good jobs (many after engineering MS and PhDs) in Korea who had to bow out of (or get forced out of) relationships due to economic considerations.  No American student of mine has ever asked for advice on how many kids to have, but my Korean students have!  Having even two kids is unimaginable for many.  Things like when they will retire and whether the kid would have graduated from college and settled in a job by then, etc, get discussed before weddings.  One student chose not to have kids at all when she married even when she and her husband are well-paid engineers  - only because they were already 35+ and felt uncertainty on economics by the time they retire.  Crazy but I could understand it.  It is not an easy life there, though it is a good life in Korea.

 

Not exactly the items you were asking about, but I hope that gives you some more input.  I see some of these things in the dramas to be not that unrealistic.  Just exaggerated a bit, that is all.  Again, any native Koreans' comments should be taken more seriously than mine in this!

[lucia704]

7 minutes ago, jayakris said:

 

Yes, he did say 거지 같은 (geoji gateun) which literally means "like a beggar" because geoji is beggar, but the phrase is used for saying "useless" "worthless" "good-for-nothing" "loser" etc without implying the beggar aspect much.  Here he had said two things though, "(You thought) I was hanshim (한심), and geoji gatteun. Wasn't that why it was so?"... The first word means "pathetic".   Because he was speaking fast, there wasn't enough time for us to read long English translations, which may be why the subber dropped the second part and said "It is. I was pathetic. That's why you did this."  (The "It is" was not said.  And it wasn't a statement, as the intonation of what he says shows)

 

The last part is a statement said as a semi-question with the "chana?" at the end.  Somebody has told all these translators that English speakers never say these things as questions, so they make them statements.  For the life of me I cannot understand it.  English speakers can and do say some of these things as questions in such arguing conversations.  And it is no big deal for us to understand it in the original form itself.  But 4 out 5 times when something said as a question, they will make it a statement.  Here they even added an etenral "It is" which was not even said.

 

I would have just translated it just as he said it.  "I was pathetic. A loser. Isn't that why?"    If more clarity is needed, maybe a "to you" can be added.  "I was pathetic.  A loser, to you.  Isn't that why?"

 

Actually I am from the US (of Indian origin) but had been in Korea over 15 years ago for 3 months as a visiting Engineering professor, but have then had brief trips many times, as I have a lot of friends and students there.  In that process I got very interested in the language, due to its history that predates later Indo-Germanic languages and Chinese.  So the structure, style, and even words are very close to older (non-Hindi) Indian languages like in the Dravidian family (Tamil, Malayalam etc) which may even have come from Korean. Or the reverse. Or they may have all developed together before Sanskrit, Arabic, Persian and Chinese marginalized the languages in India and Asia to the east.  But none of this is fully established or fully rejected now by researchers.

 

Back to your question - I am no expert on the cultural issue you raise.  But my feeling is that there  is definitely class consciousness in the Korean society.  It is not based on religion, caste, groups, etc, like in other countries.  It is rather economics and education.  Business, job, salary, parents' economic background, etc, are very important.  But a particularly striking thing is the HUGE importance given to the college degree and even more strikingly, the University one studied in.  Being the alumnus of Seoul National University automatically puts you in a higher category.  Then a few other top universities like Korea Univ, Hanyang etc (the famous SKY group that I think was a theme in the drama Sky Castle).  The college alumni networks are very strong.  The senior/junior thing is real too; the seonbae/hubae automatic friendships from having gone to the same big university, that is.  The ones from Univs below the top-10 are in another lower category.  The 100 odd other Univs below top-25 are "unknown" and worthless for Koreans, it would seem.  Most are quite good though, if you look at the quality of education, but the reputation is a whole other thing.  With that backdrop, a high school diploma is a non-starter in Korea, and SY's issues have a lot to do with it.

 

The difference you noticed in how people responded to SS getting MK, and SY getting SS is probably not unrealistic.  I think the biggest reason for it would be their feeling that a high school grad has no business dating a college grad from a top Univ like SS is.  If SY was only a high school grad, but a daughter of a very wealthy businessman, nobody would fault her though.  Money, in the end, trumps everything in Korea too

Thanks for your insightful inputs about Korea. SKY is actually the abbreviation of 3 top University in Korea, Seoul National Uni, Korea Uni and Yonsei Uni.