[Drama 2014] It's Okay, That's Love 괜찮아, 사랑이야

[readlead]

First about IOIL, I truly totally really LOVE LOVE LOVE the music! the opening title, the music for teasers, foreign song that being used as bgm, also all 3 new soundtrack, love them all! the choice of music for every scene and the way they fit it with the scene, I love it! the music at the end of ep 4 example. the music director has done very awesome job! cant wait for another soundtrack, specially one that would be sang by Yoon mirae!

D.O., Surprisingly, he does really good! he looks kind of unique boy... evenmore as a newbie in acting, he is good! seem he has talent in acting other than singing...

kwangsoo n sung dong il, love them! :DDD ah also jaebum, the actor is really good, one of good performer in AoF... there is very great chemistry among them all!

I love both OTP so much that I dont know what to say about them, but well, as a big fan of GHJ who has desired to see her to act as a "cool lady" since last year, and finally able to see it now, I am so happy, so overwhelmed, and what makes me happier, my sister finally adore and now becomes GHJ fan too!   and JIS, oh my... is it only me that I feel he is more attractive in IOIL than TWTWB?... hehe JIS has been so irresistable since I watched him in WHIB long time ago so yeah, shouldnt surprise anymore as DB's recapper said that he is like a fine wine, which is getting better by the age.

so far, though my favorite actor is GHJ, and I want to have a man like JY in my real life, but afterall, surprisingly, my most favorite character is Dong Min. daaaang, Sung Dong Il and his character, both are one of a kind for me, I love both of them so much! I enjoyed his interaction with everyone specially he and HS, the chemistry between SDI and GHJ is very great. The way he interact with HS, with JY, SK, his patient, his ex.wife, his friend, anyone, I really like him. he is the funniest character in IOIL!

[ElisaL]

I love IOTL very much ♥♥♥ each episode have their own special moment to remember. This is a drama with a new prespective. Makes me want to know about psychology. Everyone has their own stories that make they are what they are today...

[Guest dramagrandma]

Sorry if I am repeating things somebody has already pointed out.  I am not all caught up with the comments.
Various thoughts:
HS is so clueless about love.  I thought it was great when she got mad at JY for kissing her impulsively, and he shot back "You'd rather be kissed by a man who calculated, planned, and schemed for that moment?" (I'm paraphrasing).  Of course she wouldn't.  You can see the wheels churning as she thinks about that. 
I had a question about the last episode, when JY is saving the drowning woman and HS shouts out that she's pregnant so she can't have any water in her belly. That didn't make any sense to me.  I watched it again with a different set of subs, and they subbed it as 'she's pregnant, she can't swallow that water!"  So I am guessing there are perhaps some known toxins in that body of water, which, if ingested, are dangerous to the unborn child.  That makes perfect sense to me.
The scene where JY is fighting with KW's dad- I think what fell out of his pocket is KW's phone.  This could be the explanation for the one screenshot I shared where he has an incoming call from KW- I think he has a second phone he uses as KW.  I think that we are getting a few more clues here and JY does actually sometimes live and act at least partially as KW, even if only to the point of having that spare phone he doesn't really let himself know about, and when he stressed or needing to hear from KW, he pocket dials his real phone from KW's phone and then has an imaginary conversation.  We haven't realized that because we've been seeing everything only from JY's perspective.
I find it so moving and poignant that "I don't want to be your hero" is the BGM for almost every scene of the abuse in JY's childhood home.  In episode 6 in particular, the scene where JY's mother is actually covering him with her body to come between him and his step-father's blows- the line in the song is "baby needs some protection, but I'm a kid like everyone else."  It brought tears to my eyes both times I watched it.  This family is so shattered and broken by abuse, and I really believe each of them, in their own broken way, tried to protect the others, but also failed, and they are all riddled by guilt or bitterness about that.   JY's mother is obviously still dealing with guilt and trying to protect JY somehow.  (I am still struggling to have any real sympathy for JB- but I can see how he could have felt extreme guilt for not being able to protect his little brother from the beatings and in the way child abuse twists and mars everything it touches, that guilt could have turned to anger directed at the little brother who 'made' him feel so guilty). 
I am dreading the scene where somebody checks the security camera of that scene and we see JY just fighting himself and falling around in the field. It will be so sad, and so hard for him to see. 
The camel picture in the bathrooom- Wow. 
Just, wow.
 In addition to being a good parable about what childhood abuse does to a person (although I think the real story is about elephants, not camels), this is also a classic depiction of a split personality of some sort. Amazing.   And JY's explanation of how the trauma of an abusive past is not a matter of 'just letting it go.'  This is so true (I had this discussion with somebody just this week), and people do NOT understand it.  Abuse in childhood actually changes the way the brain functions- being traumatized is not a matter of choosing to handle it one or another, it's about how it altered the amagyla of the brain.  It's not that adults still struggling with the effects of traumatic childhood abuse are refusing to let it go, it's that the past will not let go of them. 
  The writer has so much insight into all kinds of issues associated with childhood abuse. I am seriously impressed.  
Also, doesn't it feel like almost everything in this drama means something? I want to go back and look at every picture, every piece of art in the house, every backstory, every one of the cases they deal with at the hospital, every dialogue, listen again to every song and see what kinds of scenes each song is used for-  ALL THE THINGS!!  The dialogue, the scenery, the cinematography, the music, it seems to be so richly nuanced and coordinated.

Also- as a bookfiend myself (I own nearly ten thousand books),  I wish I could read the titles of the books in JY's bathroom library.

[readlead]

for drama... I've already interested about mental disorder since long time ago, exactly after watched t-drama MARS (starred by vic zhou) which interesting have a similar love story, a woman who had problem about intimacy and a man, who is a playboy and had past trauma too... I'm so glad IOIL is being made, and really hope that this drama could be watched by many people... this drama perhaps one of best kdrama interm of delivering moral lesson to viewer... specially a call for everyone to do self introsvective. hope there will be more and more people watching this drama, this is really one of drama that need to be watched! because I am personally, though I show as normal as I can be infront others, I'm my self realize tha tinside me, there is one side that I hide from another and there is times when I feel like I am totally useless person, one kind of guilt I guess...

Through this drama, for the first time, I got a feeling like I getting a comfort that it's okay if sometime I am being not normal, and I should feel grateful that I'm still able to control it... as HS says to her patient, as long as there is will inside me, I can live normally... also for the first time I realize because of what JY said to HS about love, though my parents has gotten divorced and we had a quite hard life before, but I'm so lucky because since born, I've been around great family... if not, most likely I've became patient of serious mental disorder now.. for the first time I realize many things about mental disorder though I've watched many drama and movies about it before, but now not only knowledgment I get, but also a lot understansding of mental disorder specilly my own mental problem.

I love IOIL, love the cast, love the OTP and other supporting character, love the music a lot, really really love it!

[valsava]

Woow this drama id the it.. Jy has multiple personalities and illusions he needs serious help to fight off those demons within himself but on a serious note he could end up hurting himself living in the past.. I feel sorry just looking at him myself..

I think he will be the one to cure Hs of her little sex problem and mom also could use some stress release.. 

Now crazy brother Hb I don't know what to make of him he also got mental issues and have a fixation on killing Jy.. 

[Guest hyunjae_veyveh]

@jadecloud thanks for posting the photos.

I am in the minority that thinks JY stabbed his stepdad, out of blind rage, much like what KW was going through when he picked up the stone.

And JYs reaction to that, maybe he didnt want KW to experience what he experienced. So he was forceful to let KW drop the stone.

what he is to KW now is what the young JY would have needed but didn't have. He wanted someone to mind their business back when he was young but there was no one to help them.. he probably wanted someone to stop him from stabbing and killing his stepdad but of couse no one did.

He seems to be reliving his childhood through KW with modifications.. im blabbing. Probably starting to hallucinate now from waiting for Wed. Aaaaargh. The frustration.

[blim0523]

This drama is really getting better as it progresses and I feel that at the end of every episode Writer Noh wants the audience to solve a puzzle LOL! 
I love all the lines, it just strike straight to the heart and opening our minds that childhood experiences whether happy or traumatic seems to lay the ground of our adult life. In my simple mind, I think JJY created KW to heal his past. The scene where he was trying to subdue KW from hitting his dad with the stone telling him to get hold of himself and to run away with his mom made cry a bucket. It must be JJY way of altering what he could have done in his childhood becoz there was a flashback scene where he got hold of the knife, maybe at that time he really wanted to kill his step-dad though we aren't very sure now if it was an accident or he intentionally did kill his step-dad. the bottom line is he wished he could have just run away with her mom to avoid the suffering of long time abuse, those sufferings made him snap and fight back which resulted to the tragic death of his step dad though in a way it liberated him, his mom and his brother from the suffering but then again the guilt of causing the death of someone remains. 
Only a jaded heart won't be touched by that scene when JY showed HS his tub, he really bared his soul when he talked about the painting and said, "Just like how we remember the pain of our past. The trauma and the pain from our past keeps us chained to the ground." It just shows that no matter how accomplished he is, very rich and famous, still his childhood trauma is haunting him. I agree with @dramagrandma the past will never let go of to those who have suffered traumatic childhood. 
This brings me to the over use of number 3 in the drama, isn't this a manifestation that in the end HS must accept that in her relationship with JY she has to live with the fact that they won't be just 2 but 3 becoz JJY will never be able to let go KW?

[Guest hyunjae_veyveh]

Oooor... JB beats JY to put some sense into him? JB probably really loved his dongsaeng and didnt want him to feel the guilt of killing so everytime JY has this killer look, JB would beat him until he releases the knife.. but finally that scene where stepdad was beating JB, JY wanted to save his hyung so he grabbed the knife not to stab stepdad. But during the scuffle stepdad fell onto JY and the knife and died. JB was the one with the knife and JY was passed out so JB was the one jailed. Both brothers were probably victims. Ooh the sad life. See what IOTL does?? It brings out the psycho and psych docs in us. Lol

[country_pumpkin]

I'm so impressed by D.O. acting. How can a young singer-turn-actor with little acting experience portray such a lot of emotions through just 6 episodes? I'm so in love with him.

[linhthao]

I am also impressed with the background music which is always on point. The scene when JY fought against the (imaginary) dad went well with Hero-Family of the year. It reminds me of the gloomy-lonely moments that we have seen a lot in American movies.

[Guest svl93]

A little bit off topic from these very insightful posts, but this drama is really making me wonder if I do have some sort of "anxiety" problem like HS. Well, I'm 21 and never kissed anyone(not even a two-timer Choi Ho). Perhaps Jo In Sung should come to the rescue, lol. >-By the way, they came up with a new song around min. 17:20, SO good.Seriously, I'm loving the OST for this drama. Still waiting for "Love is fiction" to be released.. can't wait!! 

[moonsilchoi]

how can i miss this
Jae yeol opened his eyes)
he was surprised hae soo didn't hate the re-kiss
:-*

[Guest heeltoe22.]

The scene where we see young JY watch as his brother pulls a knife from his stepfather's chest and then passes out. I thought that JY's age was 13 - 14yr old. I was shocked by the picture of the 16 yr.old JY's battered body that was part of JB's case documents. He had been battered so severely that it took four months for him to recover. If he hadn't grabbed a knife that day for protection from that brutal man, he most certainly would have been killed. It's quite likely that the option to run away was no longer his. He probably could barely stand. He stopped KW from using the rock on his abusive father because KW's option to flee was the morally correct one. That child, JY, was the only sane member of that family. The sad part is that this clearly was a case of self defense. 

[Guest dramagrandma]

I forgot to mention this one- again, with JY's hand.  The fact that the camera lingered on this scene indicates it has some significance.  Something else about child abuse trauma (and many other traumas) is a thing called 'body memory.'  You hold the memories and patterns of your trauma in your body, not just your mind.  My personal thought is his hand is like this because at some level he knows he was holding the knife that killed his stepfather, and he's repressed that memory. -------------------I agree with others who have said it's not just one person that murdered the father.  It was an accident.  Both brothers were involved- JY was holding the knife, JB shoved the stepdad away and he fell into the knife- but I don't think either brother fully realizes his own part.  In the blur and confusion of the whole battlescene, I bet JB did not see that it was his own shove that propelled the stepfather into the knife his dongsaeng was holding.  I think JY was clearly almost knocked unconscious by the impact, and he came to only in time to see his hyung with the knife in his hand.  Both of them sincerely believe the other brother did it.--------------------------------@jadecloud!
Now that I am catching up with comments, I see that you also liked the camel picture and shared several gorgeous pics of it.  Also, you asked, "Btw, why does HS call JY a 'dog'? I can understand her prejudicial view of JY as a player...is that a korean slang or something?"
Yes.  I've read that you can turn almost anything into a swear word in korean by prefacing it with the Korean word for dog.  

--------I forgot to mention this earlier- the 'knock three times' or call and let the phone ring 3 times reminds me of an old song by the American group Tony Orlando and Dawn- I don't know if it's intentional or not.It's about a man and woman who live in the same apartment building, and he likes her and wants to know if she likes him back.  In part of the song he sings, "Knock three times on the ceiling if you want me. Twice on the pipes if you ain't gonna show."

So seventies.

[mntnh]

HY: *is cute*JY: *OMG don't be cute!*

[krgeek]

Any psychologist or psychiatrist around? If so, plse give us yr learned view of all the symbolism and parallels here. Will be interesting to know more from a scientific views the behaviorial patterns of this people here. From here, there are problems mentally with everyone, just how deep that is, and how it will,affect their lifestyle and characters. I only took Psychology 101 in U and cannot figure out why and how each of this people become what they are now. I also the dumb one not thinking that KW is the imagination and supposingly young JY until someone mentioned here. That's why I loved coming to this forum reading on the various views. It may be conflicting views and different viewpoints that each of us have but that's what make this forum interesting. No rights no wrong in our comments. We will just follow to the end of the show to see whether we are on same wavelength with writer. How I wish I could get my hand on the novel "written" by KW now lying in JY drawer. Happy watching all and looking fwd to reading all yr views.

[Dundee]

I like HS expression when JY confided in about why he sleep in the bathroom.
It's very strange that the two brother had different memory about who the one killed their step father. But i suspect JY is the one

[Viluven]

@dramagrandma‌ said Abuse in childhood actually changes the way the brain functions- being traumatized is not a matter of choosing to handle it one or another, it's about how it altered the amagyla of the brain. It's not that adults still struggling with the effects of traumatic childhood abuse are refusing to let it go, it's that the past will not let go of them.

The writer has so much insight into all kinds of issues associated with childhood abuse. I am seriously impressed.

Also, doesn't it feel like almost everything in this drama means something? I want to go back and look at every picture, every piece of art in the house, every backstory, every one of the cases they deal with at the hospital, every dialogue, listen again to every song and see what kinds of scenes each song is used for- ALL THE THINGS!! The dialogue, the scenery, the cinematography, the music, it seems to be so richly nuanced and coordinated.

From what you've wrote, I'll put this drama on my collection. The drama which can be re watch over and over again.

And @readlead‌ ‌after you said about MARS then I recall my memory and I agree with you. I like that drama too. So dark, gloomy but later enlighting. I wish we'll experienced that too in IOTL.

[mdj101]

@kg321,
On p.116, where you commented on the skirt and on the handbag in the "bus stop" scene, wasn't HS wearing one of Yoo Ah In's now famous Hangeul design tee shirts?  (NEW KIDZ line at NOHANT)So many actors have been spotted wearing them in dramas lately, since the profits go to a charity for children.

[ChibiLy]

12blbl said: I like HS expression when JY confided in about why he sleep in the bathroom.
It's very strange that the two brother had different memory about who the one killed their step father. But i suspect JY is the one