Ask The Ladies - Read First Post

[fwnc_b!]

Is there a way I can mind control a girl to like stop bringing up the past and stop repeating over and over on everything?

Hmm.. It depends on what she's repeating. Could be it that she felt insecure that she needed assurance from you? Other than that, it's just girls' nature to repeat, but you could try to tell her. Just be honest, because there's no point beating round the bush. Tell her how you feel.

[Guest ekrystal]

Is there a way I can mind control a girl to like stop bringing up the past and stop repeating over and over on everything?

no mind control but you just need to be sensitive to her feelings. remind her why you should move away from the past. n give her enough reason to let it go.

[Guest 강유미]

I always meet the wrong girl when I start being nice to them, because my true self is just being annoyed at everything and being mean..

Whenever this happens, the girl that I'm being nice to is actually having somewhat of a feeling towards me..

But when I find out her true personality and her weird funky characteristic, even though she's being herself..

I start to lose interest towards her, because she's never thinking before she talks and other stupid little things..

It's not even a mistake for her, because she's being herself.. But I start to get my true self coming back again..

Being annoyed at her and I start treating her in a mean way.. Sometimes, get in her face and pissing her off..

Is there a problem with me or is there a problem with the girls I'm talking to..?

Because I really can't tell and when I can't tell.. I assume it's the girl's fault and treat her like she ruined everything.

[Guest suki_*]

I always meet the wrong girl when I start being nice to them, because my true self is just being annoyed at everything and being mean..

Whenever this happens, the girl that I'm being nice to is actually having somewhat of a feeling towards me..

But when I find out her true personality and her weird funky characteristic, even though she's being herself..

I start to lose interest towards her, because she's never thinking before she talks and other stupid little things..

It's not even a mistake for her, because she's being herself.. But I start to get my true self coming back again..

Being annoyed at her and I start treating her in a mean way.. Sometimes, get in her face and pissing her off..

Is there a problem with me or is there a problem with the girls I'm talking to..?

Because I really can't tell and when I can't tell.. I assume it's the girl's fault and treat her like she ruined everything.

Absolutely nothing wrong with that way, you're just being yourself and she is being herself.

You took a chance and get to know how she is inside and you're just not attracted to it. The way you handle it is just your way of showing what a turn-off her personality to you really is.

np, just take your time, keep getting to know ppl, you'll find one that's not annoying eventually.

There is something wrong with yourself if you constantly do this with or without the girl annoying you though. don't make it a habit. just be careful.

in this case though, it's just the girl you are talking to.

Goodluck.

[Guest -HyuNi-]

Yeah, just because it doesn't seem meaningful and it doesn't really seem like a real job.

iEatPowder - What type of girl is your date? Conservative and Shy? or Outgoing and Party girl-ish?

Well, you can never go wrong with bringing her to great restaurant, preferable with great view or the ones that are unique. Have you hear about this restaurant on top of a tower that moves around? Well, something unique like that.

If you want to bring her to the movies, reserve a special room or a golden seat.

Or you can just take a stroll after dinner.

Visit interesting shops, like some sort of glass shop where you can do your own glass creations and then you can give her that as a souvenir.

Whatever it is, to create one heck of a first date, one needs meticulous plannings.

I watched many k-dramas and they have the best date ideas.

You can also have a picnic at the beach later at the evenings and end it with fireworks at night.

Or while you guys are eating, hire violinists to play..That's really sweet.

If there's a play, you can bring her there too.

Oh well, those are my ideas...I hope it's not too far-fetched to use.

Wow, the suggestions started out OK, then it got more ridiculous towards the bottom. haha

From my limited (may I add, VERY LIMITED experience), if you want a really good date, you just have to connect.

I've been doing different things when I go out with my girl (ie: watch along the beach, dinner, movie, coffee, dance lessons, park, roller blading, art museum, concerts, six flags, etc) and the best dates seem to be the ones that involve minimal planning and gives a lot of time to sit down and talk.

I think one of my favorite nights was when she and I went to Navy Pier and just sat on a bench and talked about things on our minds. It was getting late so she laid down in my lap and took a nap for about 30 minutes. I felt so good cuz it felt like I was protecting her or something. haha I know, stupid.

Another date we both really enjoyed was when we went to the art museum. She's studying at the Art Institute in Chicago, so she knows a few things about art. We went around and experienced everything together. I really feel like she opened my eyes to a whole new world I'm working on my masters in accounting and never really took an interest in art. Who knows? Maybe I gave her a new perspective and inspired her a little too.

I find funny that the same people who are answering questions in this forum are asking questions in the "Ask the fellas" forum and the guys who are answering questions in that forum are asking questions in this forum. I think it goes to show how guys and girls really don't know much about each other and that each situation is delicate and unique.

-John

[Guest linny]

Here's a question!

For those of you who have been/are in love, how/when did you know you were in love?

And yes, I realize for every person it's different. I'm just curious about everyone's experiences. XD

[Guest MoiraElla]

Here's a question!

For those of you who have been/are in love, how/when did you know you were in love?

And yes, I realize for every person it's different. I'm just curious about everyone's experiences. XD

it's just the feeling. like you have that strong passionate feeling that you know that they're different than everyone else. its kind of hard to explain but you just know it...its the connection between two people.

[wasabi29]

I always meet the wrong girl when I start being nice to them, because my true self is just being annoyed at everything and being mean..

Whenever this happens, the girl that I'm being nice to is actually having somewhat of a feeling towards me..

But when I find out her true personality and her weird funky characteristic, even though she's being herself..

I start to lose interest towards her, because she's never thinking before she talks and other stupid little things..

It's not even a mistake for her, because she's being herself.. But I start to get my true self coming back again..

Being annoyed at her and I start treating her in a mean way.. Sometimes, get in her face and pissing her off..

Is there a problem with me or is there a problem with the girls I'm talking to..?

Because I really can't tell and when I can't tell.. I assume it's the girl's fault and treat her like she ruined everything.

It's your problem. Maybe you need to see a therapist. Or maybe you need to self reflect before getting into a relationship. I have a feeling that you have somewhat a high opinion regarding yourself. Since you're korean, it's the term called "Prince disease"?..Lol, whatever..If you treat a girl badly, someday it'll bite you bad so I suggest you to sort yourself out first. Ask your exes and friends what kind of a person you actually are then it'll give you a better prospect of yourself thus making it easier to solve.

John, it hurts when you said my suggestions were ridiclous...Which one? Where? Your date seems typical and boring, you might as well take my suggestions in too.

linny - Love is such a heavy word, I've never been in love..I've been infatuated. All I know is when my friend's in love, she becomes stupid and I have to be the free therapist giving advices she never takes eventhough she asks for it.

[Guest jia0zi]

I always meet the wrong girl when I start being nice to them, because my true self is just being annoyed at everything and being mean..

Whenever this happens, the girl that I'm being nice to is actually having somewhat of a feeling towards me..

But when I find out her true personality and her weird funky characteristic, even though she's being herself..

I start to lose interest towards her, because she's never thinking before she talks and other stupid little things..

It's not even a mistake for her, because she's being herself.. But I start to get my true self coming back again..

Being annoyed at her and I start treating her in a mean way.. Sometimes, get in her face and pissing her off..

Is there a problem with me or is there a problem with the girls I'm talking to..?

Because I really can't tell and when I can't tell.. I assume it's the girl's fault and treat her like she ruined everything.

your situation kinda sounds like what usually happens to me. like i would talk to a guy....and we'd be friends. but IF he starts to like me, and i dont like him that way, i start to get annoyed and i become a big meanie. ahha

there's nothing with you, i think you just got yourself in a bad situation. the girl can only be herself, and its natural for people to have their standards. im guessing for you, that standard is NOT girls that talk like idiots (who dont think before they speak).

i guess sometimes you just have to realize that everyone girl has a different personality, and a different social aspect? ><

[Guest ChaeRinxx]

Here's a question!

For those of you who have been/are in love, how/when did you know you were in love?

And yes, I realize for every person it's different. I'm just curious about everyone's experiences. XD

Well, i am currently inlove with my boyfriend. i didn't find out i loved him until

i was about to break up with him for another guy. lol

i know i know, thats horrible but i had started talking to another guy and

we kind of had feelings. but then i was going out with my family one day.

and i realized that i didn't want to introduce anyone to my family but my current

boyfriend. and that he was the person i could start a family with, and live the rest of

my life with =]

[Guest CriticalHit]

I always meet the wrong girl when I start being nice to them, because my true self is just being annoyed at everything and being mean..

Whenever this happens, the girl that I'm being nice to is actually having somewhat of a feeling towards me..

But when I find out her true personality and her weird funky characteristic, even though she's being herself..

I start to lose interest towards her, because she's never thinking before she talks and other stupid little things..

It's not even a mistake for her, because she's being herself.. But I start to get my true self coming back again..

Being annoyed at her and I start treating her in a mean way.. Sometimes, get in her face and pissing her off..

Is there a problem with me or is there a problem with the girls I'm talking to..?

Because I really can't tell and when I can't tell.. I assume it's the girl's fault and treat her like she ruined everything.

(Sorry about the no-more-than-2-replies rule but this question really applies to me o.o)

That's funny, because there's a guy I was talking to that is almost acting exactly like that. He was nice at first but being myself I'm pretty weird and after he found out I'm kinda weird he didn't talk as much and in fact he is quite mean now. My personal feelings about that is that I feel hurt and angry because this guy was talking to me and all of a sudden he's giving me an attitude, and I don't even know what I did wrong. I have no idea that the guy might have been thinking that I'm too weird and he's not interested in talking to me anymore. So from the girls point of view she may be really confused about why you "suddenly" gave her an attitude; but its not sudden, it's because you don't like her personality. And not that there's anything wrong with being weird of course...

From a more backing off view, you're just being yourself. You don't like her personality? That's fine, you don't have to force youself to like anyone. Who you like is your choice. However giving her an attitude might hurt her feelings and like you said, make her pissed off. So in that way you are not thinking about the girls feelings. If you don't care about her feelings, then that's too bad... you could be nice and instead of acting mean to her you could just not talk as much to her. You know, the whole "treat others as you want others to treat you" thing.

But it's all your own choice. You can stay like the way you are because you're being you, or you can be a nicer person and not be a meanie to girls whose personality you don't like.

Hope that answers you question...

[Guest hippiehop]

I always meet the wrong girl when I start being nice to them, because my true self is just being annoyed at everything and being mean..

Whenever this happens, the girl that I'm being nice to is actually having somewhat of a feeling towards me..

But when I find out her true personality and her weird funky characteristic, even though she's being herself..

I start to lose interest towards her, because she's never thinking before she talks and other stupid little things..

It's not even a mistake for her, because she's being herself.. But I start to get my true self coming back again..

Being annoyed at her and I start treating her in a mean way.. Sometimes, get in her face and pissing her off..

Is there a problem with me or is there a problem with the girls I'm talking to..?

Because I really can't tell and when I can't tell.. I assume it's the girl's fault and treat her like she ruined everything.

All I can say is... don't mask who you really are. You want a girl to like you for you, not for who you think you should be. It comes off as a shock if you all of a sudden become mean when you were really nice before. Sure, you want a girl to like you, but aren't you lying to her this way? But I also guess it depends on what you find annoying about her, because it might be reasonable or it might just be you.

[Guest MoiraElla]

(Sorry about the no-more-than-2-replies rule but this question really applies to me o.o)

I think the threadmaker erased that rule.

anyways, i have a problem and i need help from my fellow soompi girls.

it's not all that complicated actually, i just need very good suggestions on what to do. I know what i should be doing but i need push or someone to point it out to me. Anyways, i wouldn't say i have a boyfriend. I sort of do, I guess. the relationship i have with him is actually very complicated and i don't want to be too detailed about it but if you must know, please pm me. Anyways, he left more than a month ago to juvy. sort of like a jail but for the youth. I'm basically waiting for him to come back, but I haven't visited him enough. When i write to him, he doesn't respond to them. I can't see him because I don't live very close to the center but...when i have time, I do. But it's hard to, i try to make time to but I can't. So i write to him, but he NEVER responds to me, and for his friends that do visit him often, he doesn't tell them to give me any messages. It would be nice if he did, but I don't think he did. Now, I'm basically waiting for him to come back which is WHO KNOWS when. and, so now, there's a ANOTHER guy that i knew who recently just talked to me again after a few months --close to a year. and he started talking to me daily now. And I sing for fun, so he asked me if i can sing with him and his friend, they're rappers and basically they're asking me to do a collaboration with them. I was like sure, why noT? that sounds fun. but just yesterday, the guy told me that he had a surprise song for me. i was like O_O oh man, i think this guy is liking me. that's my initial thought. i know, a little cocky but this guy, he's really.....like..he has his heart on his sleeve. he likes girls very easily i guess. and a year ago, we sort of did like each other. To me, I think he's continuing from where we left off....so, the thing is, I already have someone in mind but seems like he doesn't seem to be trying to make up this time that he's away..it would be nice to send at least ONE letter, cmon. OH and these two guys, they know each other. ok? they're not friends but they sort of have the same friends. I don't know what to do. I don't like this rapper though. Should i tell him that I have someone in mind? I don't want to hurt him. But i'm not going to lead him on either.

sigh thanks for whoever's taking the time to read this (:

please ask me any questions if confused.

[Guest DBSK_love]

I always meet the wrong girl when I start being nice to them, because my true self is just being annoyed at everything and being mean..

Whenever this happens, the girl that I'm being nice to is actually having somewhat of a feeling towards me..

But when I find out her true personality and her weird funky characteristic, even though she's being herself..

I start to lose interest towards her, because she's never thinking before she talks and other stupid little things..

It's not even a mistake for her, because she's being herself.. But I start to get my true self coming back again..

Being annoyed at her and I start treating her in a mean way.. Sometimes, get in her face and pissing her off..

Is there a problem with me or is there a problem with the girls I'm talking to..?

Because I really can't tell and when I can't tell.. I assume it's the girl's fault and treat her like she ruined everything.

well...first off the girl does have problem...if she doesnt think before she talks then that can be rude in a lot of cases

otherwise for you....dont assume its the girls fault, think about what u did too, and also since u werent being yourself in the first place, seeing a change in you could have pissed her off...like u said shes jus being herself and if u cant accept her personality then shes not right for you

[Guest koumi]

All irreverent posts are deleted and removed. Please stick to the original topic and don't post anything inappropriate.

[Guest 1lasthope]

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[wasabi29]

^ But the person who asked was in his twenties

[Antz]

Here's a question!

For those of you who have been/are in love, how/when did you know you were in love?

And yes, I realize for every person it's different. I'm just curious about everyone's experiences. XD

I knew it when the feeling wasn't like any other feeling that I've had for another guy. I thought about him a lot, how much he could change me and that I missed him even from being apart from him for five minutes.

[Guest 1lasthope]

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[wasabi29]

So...? Is he in a long term relationship? Was his question: what should I do for my 1 or 2 year aniversary? (I don't remember the question already, lol)

'cause if he was to do something so dramatic (even for one month aniversary) i think most girls (especially non-drama watchers) would be a bit freaked out...

I really don't feel like arguing today. But your reasoning's weak. Just for the sake of this thread, let's just end it. Again, it's my opinion and I don't think it's wrong since this is what the thread's all about.