[Drama 2015/2016] I Have A Lover 애인있어요

[lclarakl]

1 hour ago, lenet said:

 

Why did you think I wrote those words quoted in RED?? before my explanation?  Gotcha!!  You only see half the picture.  The scene ended with JE getting out of the bed and to leave as HK wanted but at the doorway, he explained why he had to see her to bade her farewell.  So there is reason why he must see her or she'll regret.  Did you not see her reluctance to let him go??  She backhugged him to stop him leaving for a while to let him know she reciprocrated his love.

 

You didn't get me at all. YOU still are missing my point that I was making in my ORIGINAL post. I know why JE went into her room. However, it doesn't change the facts that he did it without her permission and he completely ignored her request that she gave him while he was standing outside of her window.  I see the complete picture. Because some are so focused on the romance, they think his actions are okay because of the end results are positive. It's not okay to ignore the people's wants and desires.  So you think you're seeing the whole picture because it had a 'good' ending, what if it was a 'bad' ending? However JE's actions of how he got there is what I'm addressing. 

I don't see half the picture, I see the whole picture. I know JE got up to leave, however, that was AFTER JE did what JE wanted to do.  If you want to look more into 'AFTER' what JE did and the backhug from HK, tell me, how many times did HK write or visit JE while he was in the military those 2 years?

So again, JE does, what JE wants to do. HE doesn't respect the wishes of others until after he's had his way first.  It may all be acting on HK's part, but I loved when she slapped him for manhandling her.

[DelroyB]

1 hour ago, Katrina Abdul Talib said:

Thats exactly my point dear. Lets see, how long hv JE been in love with HK till the point of his daughter's death? 15yrs? 14yrs? 10yrs? Still cannot understand each other? So what do they do together at home or JE must be sleeping in Mars and HK in Venus each night? LOL

I think when one is in love...every single thing you can't wait to discuss with your spouse, SHARING...unless you have something to hide if 'cos!

@Katrina Abdul Talib

That one the main issues they had reached an impasse.  They need a third party, counselor, priets, parent psychologist  to help them though it.  HG just could not face it. JE could not understand. Both of these smart people needed outside help.  JE was overcome by grief and HG by grief and guilt.

Also HG did have something to hide her role in ruining a man cause her daughters death. Do you think she wants JE to know that? So I would add fear to it,

That why she chose words that would make JE mad at her.  

[lclarakl]

8 minutes ago, Lmangla said:

kekeke... @lclarakl ~ I never said that JE and HK have a healthy relationship. hahaha.. what I said was their relationship was complicated and messy because he is part of her family. whereas, with BS, he is a friend and therefore, that kind of complicated, messy baggage does not exist. (if someone who understood my post can explain better, please do! ) and because that kind of complicated, messy baggage does not exist, she can share how she feels and get his help. and she pretty much has messy complicated relationship with all her family members, not just JE. so it can't be that everyone is messed up and she is perfect. she too has her issues which she needs to sort out in order to become happy. 

 

See that's just the point of my post. When you look at what makes a good relationship and I compare the 2 men, the writer has given BS more of the things needed to make a good relationship than she did with JE.

I think one of the biggest failures in JE and HK's marriage was because JE probably used the same tactics we've seen throughout this drama, pulling/forcing HK alone and never asking or requiring anything from her in return. Always chasing after her instead of letting her chase after him.  Probably why she never felt she had to give of herself. He tries to force things to go his way, instead of building a mutual relationship and partnering with the person.

He should have treated HK the same way YK is treating the doctor. I've always felt the doctor and HK have similar personalities. However, with the help of WJ, the doctor seems to smile a lot lately now that he has YK and WJ in his life. 

[Guest lenet]

21 minutes ago, lclarakl said:

 

You didn't get me at all. YOU still are missing my point that I was making in my ORIGINAL post. I know why JE went into her room. However, it doesn't change the facts that he did it without her permission and he completely ignored her request that she gave him while he was standing outside of her window.  I see the complete picture. Because some are so focused on the romance, they think his actions are okay because of the end results are positive. It's not okay to ignore the people's wants and desires.  So you think you're seeing the whole picture because it had a 'good' ending, however JE's actions of how he got there is what I'm addressing. 

I don't see half the picture, I see the whole picture. I know JE got up to leave, however, that was AFTER JE did what JE wanted to do.  If you want to look more into 'AFTER' what JE did and the backhug from HK, tell me, how many times did HK write or visit JE while he was in the military those 2 years?

So again, JE does, what JE wants to do. HE doesn't respect the wishes of others until after he's had his way first.  It may all be acting on HK's part, but I loved when she slapped him for manhandling her.

Sure I gotcha. That is exactly what I meant when I say you only see half the picture. You only want to judge the first part of him getting in as an example of him doing whatever he wants.  He didn't just do what he wants.  He did that for a good reason.  The second part, he also did what HK wants (gal's rspectablility) He leaves the room as she would want him to but not before giving her the important message.   I did not deny the first part as I said he went in stealthily but I gave a reason for that.  Perhaps I should say you see the whole picture but you judge based on half a picture.

[DelroyB]

JE cannot win for losing.  If he had left without telling HG we had enlisted would she have been upset or not.

Some people get pass at proposing every day for 4 years,  acting like your some ones boy friend when your not. 

Coming into your guest room to sleep by them. 

Other are declared selfish when you try and tell your girlfriend your going into the Army. 

Whatever JE it a capital sin.  Other get a pass.

[DelroyB]

45 minutes ago, Lmangla said:

kekeke... @lclarakl ~ I never said that JE and HK have a healthy relationship. hahaha.. what I said was their relationship was complicated and messy because he is part of her family. whereas, with BS, he is a friend and therefore, that kind of complicated, messy baggage does not exist. (if someone who understood my post can explain better, please do! ) and because that kind of complicated, messy baggage does not exist, she can share how she feels and get his help. and she pretty much has messy complicated relationship with all her family members, not just JE. so it can't be that everyone is messed up and she is perfect. she too has her issues which she needs to sort out in order to become happy. 

 

I use KDRAMA trope.

The dying significant other.  

Be it BF,GF,parent  they will never tell the one they love they have terminal illness.

Instead everyone including the janitor will hear of it.

1) They don't want the other to know 

Because don't want them to see them week

Dont want to be a burden

Want them to be remembered by them in good health

etc etc.

In other word there just somethings you can not tell the one you love the most but it ok to tell  friend or stranger.

The revenge plot.

Keep enemies, friends and accomplices close and lovers distant till the end.

We have all seen it where the lovers break apart so someone can get revenge

yet they confide in the friend,

 

In conclusion in Kdrama land the lover is the last to know.  In fact if you get confided in that a sure sign  You've been Friend Zoned! 

[lclarakl]

14 minutes ago, lenet said:

Sure I gotcha. That is exactly what I meant when I say you only see half the picture. You only want to judge the first part of him getting in as an example of him doing whatever he wants.  He didn't just do what he wants.  He did that for a good reason.  The second part, he also did what HK wants (gal's rspectablility) He leaves the room as she would want him to but not before giving her the important message.   I did not deny the first part as I said he went in stealthily but I gave a reason for that.  Perhaps I should say you see the whole picture but you judge on half a picture.

 

Sorry, I think this argument makes absolutely no sense. I'm not talking about the results of JE's actions which could be good or bad, I'm talking about when someone tells you something and honoring what they requested.  JE DID NOT DO WHAT HK WANTED, JE DID WHAT HE WANTED. JUST BEAUSE SHE GAVE HIM A BACK HUG, DOES NOT MEAN HE DID WHAT SHE WANTED.  You have men (in a relationship) who force themselves on women sexually and the woman finally just gives in to get it over quickly. However, the man didn't do what she wanted, he did what he wanted. He may have even felt that since she gave into him, she wanted it too. It doesn't change the fact that he ingress the want of others....probably why he burns himself out.

[Lmangla]

19 minutes ago, lclarakl said:

34 minutes ago, Lmangla said:

kekeke... @lclarakl ~ I never said that JE and HK have a healthy relationship. hahaha.. what I said was their relationship was complicated and messy because he is part of her family. whereas, with BS, he is a friend and therefore, that kind of complicated, messy baggage does not exist. (if someone who understood my post can explain better, please do! ) and because that kind of complicated, messy baggage does not exist, she can share how she feels and get his help. and she pretty much has messy complicated relationship with all her family members, not just JE. so it can't be that everyone is messed up and she is perfect. she too has her issues which she needs to sort out in order to become happy. 

 

See that's just the point of my post. When you look at what makes a good relationship and I compare the 2 men, the writer has given BS more of the things needed to make a good relationship than she did with JE.

I think one of the biggest failures in JE and HK's marriage was because JE probably used the same tactics we've seen throughout this drama, pulling/forcing HK alone and never asking or requiring anything from her in return. Always chasing after her instead of letting her chase after him.  Probably why she never felt she had to give of herself. He tries to force things to go his way, instead of building a mutual relationship and partnering with the person.

He should have treated HK the same way YK is treating the doctor. I've always felt the doctor and HK have similar personalities. However, with the help of WJ, the doctor seems to smile a lot lately now that he has YK and WJ in his life.

 

kekeke... you really love BS don't you? well I won't blame you. in scandal, I was so enamored of the second lead MB and worried about his fate, that everyone on the forum laughingly referred to him as my puppy. hahahah   that said, it is not about whether BS is a better man or if he makes a better partner compared to JE. it is always been that JE made her heart thump, while BS was her friend. this writer never confuses the two in all her previous dramas and she has a healthy respect for friendships. in scandal, there was no triangle and the second lead and girl were friends from beginning to end. in all that glitters, the second lead was one crazy girl but the guy was always firm and clear -- sorry, you are not who I am interested in. so unless the writer dramatically changes her writing style, BS will remain her friend and he will know exactly where he stands till the end.

[tambui]

This is a funny video made by Vietnam fanpage.  It is about the difference between DHK in the drama and DHK in real life 

https://www.facebook.com/ihavealover/videos/1657434861176796/

 

[Katrina Abdul Talib]

1 hour ago, lenet said:

@Katrina Abdul Talib

@lclarakl..I also think the word 'love' is used way too loosely in this drama. It describes emotions and actions that are not 'love' to me....

Thats exactly how I feel. JE and HK lived under the same roof with no outside interferences like having mum, in-laws living in the same house. JUST THE TWO OF THEM.. When doter died one flew to venus the other to Mars.. 

Whereas when she FIRST CAME to the BEAKs with amnesia, BS on many occasions sat outside her bedroom and listened while HK had nightmares. When they got worse he hugged and was there for her. Did he say anything much? HK did not have to tell him, he KNEW she was in such pain. He got her involved with the other siblings to help change her 'cold' ways! He did something to help her!

[andy78]

2 hours ago, jadecloud said:

 

Here's a translation in the meantime  :

• Ep 31 Preview Text Translation
• HK casually wishes JE 'Happy Birthday', but her heart is in great pain.
• TS wants to find ways to send YK out of the country.
• HK looks for TS and hands him the KSY stuff (from YK's luggage). At the same time, she warns TS to handover all the forged documents he had created during her absence.
• YK has been curious about the reason GS wants to live with WJ and her, and so she pesters GS for an answer.
• GS says he worries about them, and surprises YK with his love confession.... (GaaaaAHHHHHH finally! ) 

---------end of trans/jadecloud----------

Thanks so much @jadecloud!!!I wonder what will be HG strategy...HK looks for TS and hands him the KSY stuff (from YK's luggage...I bet she made a copy...she is a smart lady!Cute doc love confession!!!I can't wait!!!TS wants to find ways to send YK out of the country???What a jerk!

[DelroyB]

1 hour ago, DelroyB said:

Making SeolRi an evil person has made people disregard what a cruel thing JinEon has done. His actions and overly caring words misleading a young orphan girl (who is also looking for love and affection) who could have been totally innocent. He spends time with her, does things for her, promises her, has physical relation, speeds up the divorce with his wife but then suddenly feels she was not what he was looking for and she had served her purpose in hurting his wife at which point he dumps her. The only bright side being he is sincerely apologetic about it, but what good does that do? As far as only JinEon is concerned SeolRi is the victim used by a rich guy and then abandoned, now she is being used by some of his family but has no choice but to be there.

 

No one made SR evil.   SR bought it on herself.   JE was kind to her because she was young and struggling, determined and smart he kind of admired her because she was young version of his wife. Someone he was missing after SE death and his wife's detachment.   He did not harbor romantic thoughts for SR.  In a rather ironic way it was HG that help to advance the relationship.  When she confronted SR in the coffee.  SR pride was crushed in her words.  After that SR had something to prove.  When SR found the divorce papers   she went into all out seduction mode.

She was going to make JE hers and take him away from HG. She knew the marriage was in trouble and she was going to fully exploit that.  JE made no promises to SR.  She did not need them. Also HG used SR to vent her frustrations on also.  Every attack she did on SR was followed by JE attacking her. 

They both used SR as proxy in their war.  Only SR was to happy to be used as such.It was all out war between all three no one was passive victim.  Even after the suicide attempt.  HG recovers and starts another round of attacks on SR.  That why Je could believe the photos.  Because it was really not out of character for HG.   SR used by rich man?   How about HG using the influence oh JE family to push SR out of the school and make her go abroad. 

JE did wrong and sorry for his behavior but he was not the one acting like the noble family heir it was HG.  Remember it was JE kindness and father figure that attracted SR.  It was later she found out about his wealth. 

SR victim?  More like Jezebel. 

Heck she even partnered with JR.

[chubbychub1966]

New stills. What's up with HK

Cr. SBS

Love HK2.0 style though 

[chubbychub1966]

Haha so cute. This soon to be family I hope 

 

[andy78]

HK2.0 has class and style...is a true lady...so beautifull!!!Red suits her so well...

[Guest lenet]

6 hours ago, lenet said:

 

On 12/17/2015 at 8:40 PM, lclarakl said:

The reason JE keeps making mistakes, IMO and from what I've observed is because he only sees things from how he feels. Even in college, JE did whatever JE wanted to do--he never asked HG, he just took what he wanted and forced HG to comply. He didn't ask HG, he just did it--which we've seen a lot of in the past 30 episodes; especially the yanking and pulling HG around. To be honest, I don't find that type of forceful attitude romantic. What's sad is he was  with her 15 years and still doesn't know how to reach her. How is it possible that BS could? He said he did it before, he could do it again--only he has the manual to unlocking her.....BS?  I don't get the impression that HG visited BS with the intention of asking for help, I think as the two of them spoke she let her guard down. I do feel she was drawn to him as her lighthouse--she just needed to be around him and because she knew him overhearing what she said earlier, may cause him to drink at the office--they know each other emotionally. I've felt that with every visit when she's with BS, there are little facial expressions that indicate his words are impacting and hurting her. 

 

6 hours ago, lenet said:

@lclarakl Sigh!  you just don't get JE, do you??

I could debunk this sentence so easily.  Remember the college hostel scene,  don't look at half the picture, look at the entirety for a fair judgement.  JE went in stealthily but it was because he had urgent matter to disclose to her- his enlistment into army.  HK wanted him to leave.  Did he stay and force his own way? No he complied after disclosing his message. 

After 15 years, their marriage came into an impasse. JE couldn't reach her because she shuts herself out over a trauma.  BS could reach her because that trauma that shut her out was 'obliterated temporarily' by her amnesia. As mentioned before, HK has 0 historical baggage to cause any obstruction, she is a blank sheet.    

 

1 hour ago, lclarakl said:

 

Sorry, I think this argument makes absolutely no sense. I'm not talking about the results of JE's actions which could be good or bad,I'm talking about when someone tells you something and honoring what they requested.  JE DID NOT DO WHAT HK WANTED, JE DID WHAT HE WANTED. JUST BEAUSE SHE GAVE HIM A BACK HUG, DOES NOT MEAN HE DID WHAT SHE WANTED.  You have men (in a relationship) who force themselves on women sexually and the woman finally just gives in to get it over quickly. However, the man didn't do what she wanted, he did what he wanted. He may have even felt that since she gave into him, she wanted it too. It doesn't change the fact that he ingress the want of others....probably why he burns himself out.

I refer to your original post to which I was commenting on.  There was nothing about : I'm talking about when someone tells you something and honoring what they requested.  

Your post mentioned "Even in college, JE did whatever JE wanted to do--he never asked HG, he just took what he wanted and forced HG to comply. He didn't ask HG, he just did it--which we've seen a lot of in the past 30 episodes; especially the yanking and pulling HG around."    And so I tried to recall the colleges scenes and I can only remember 3 college scenes : 1) the library scene where he waited before planting a surprise kiss on her. 2) the bus chasing scene 3) the hostel scene.  There wasn't any pulling or yanking or compelling HK when she told him to do something in the library scene or the bus scene. He just planted a surprise kiss which she didn't entirely dislike it.  Of course he didn't and he shouldn't ask HK otherwise it would be so major boring! I don't know how he can yank or pull her from the moving bus.  So the third likely scene is the hostel scene.  Here, he didn't go home as she asked because he need urgently to tell her personally and maybe give her a hug for the last time as he is leaving for army.  Again, it was a playful, surprise kiss between two lovebirds.  And he didn't force himself on her.  He was leaving the hostel, he did not compel her to let him sleep there.  So like you said, it make no sense to say he did whatever he want and forced HK to comply.  

[lclarakl]

Just as this thread has a greater majority of JE supports who sees most of his actions as positive or romantic (with the exception of his cheating), I'm a BS supporter and sees most of his actions as positive with no malicious intent.  I've always said that I believe (75%) that JE and HK are the end game. However, there is 25% of me that believes it could be BS.

I will say that I absolutely love, love, love the fact that out of all the men, the writer has made BS to be the most outstanding man of all of them.  More than that, she made BS, the guy that HK once looked down on, into the guy that she now looks up to and aspires to be a great attorney like him one day.  Although she had a perfect win record, she knew that her wins were not ethical and over the years of working with BS, has learned what it means to be a good ethical lawyer; feeling the joy and pride of knowing that you helped someone and they greatly appreciated your efforts. She kept all those letters that were sent to her. She didn't have them filed away out of sight, she kept them on a shelf where they were handy.

BS has received a lot of bashing about the 4 years HK was with him. There was no logical or reasonable understanding that HK pretty much identified herself by having YK's identification.  No understanding that BS obvious tried to find her family and so did YK2, but there was none to be found so she had to remain with the Baeks.  BS tried to help her regain her memory. He didn't keep her locked into a house, instead he took her to their class reunion to try and help jog her memory and see who else she may have remained close to over the years. He actually got tired of her mean, nasty attitude and couldn't stand her, and yet, he continued to help her.  People purposely made up false things about BS because they wanted a clear path for JE--talking about he kidnapped HK, and forced her to stay there, made her become something she's not.  However, the writer shot all that down. JE thought HK didn't like pork, but guess what, she does. He probably thinks she likes only wine, but no she can guzzle beer with the best of them. HK was in an environment where she could be herself without judgement.  

The best line spoken by HK about BS, besides him being a lighthouse, was when she told her mother those 4 years she was with BS truly changed her life, they were a GIFT.

He changed or inspired her to be a better person. When I hear TS talking about how HK will serve YK up, it makes me even more thankful that she was with BS.  TS is talking about the old HK, not the new one. Old HK most definitely would have served her sister up without a second thought. JR is trying to serve up her own brother.  HK was in an environment (Baeks) for the first time where loved flowed freely and all were expected to pull their share; an environment where things were discussed. Not in one where just one person (JE) catered to the needs of one (HK).

So when I read posts about how BS stole HK's life, I think I will join HK and say, "Thank Goodness!"

The only thing I hope is that the writer doesn't make HK a bad person by letting her use BS' love for her against him. 

[trust71]

WE STILL HAVE 20 EP. MORE TO COME .....IF THE DHK WE SEE FR.10-28EP...REMAIN THE SAME THEN I CAN TELL THAT  BS  HAS A BIG INFLUENCE ON HER...

DURING THAT TIME SHE IS NOT WHAT SHE IS..THAT  DHK FAMILY MEMBER KNOW...JUST LIKE WHAT JR SAY...PUTTING A SHOW...

 

@chubbychub1966...thanks for sharing the.photo...her facial expression say that..... she witness something that hurt her. 

[DelroyB]

12 minutes ago, Katrina Abdul Talib said:

@lclarakl..I also think the word 'love' is used way too loosely in this drama. It describes emotions and actions that are not 'love' to me....

Thats exactly how I feel. JE and HK lived under the same roof with no outside interferences like having mum, in-laws living in the same house. JUST THE TWO OF THEM.. When doter died one flew to venus the other to Mars.. 

Whereas when she FIRST CAME to the BEAKs with amnesia, BS on many occasions sat outside her bedroom and listened while HK had nightmares. When they got worse he hugged and was there for her. Did he say anything much? HK did not have to tell him, he KNEW she was in such pain. He got her involved with the other siblings to help change her 'cold' ways! He did something to help her!

 

HG  with memories and YK2 without are different personalities.   BS thought he knew what YK2 dream was about. He was wrong,  He thought he knew who YK2 was and was wrong again.   Look at how devastated  BS is when YK goes into cold HG mode.   Would he be able to take that for months on end.   Could he deal with an unrepentant power hungry HG? Also BS just not dealing with any doubts or worries.  He was not under heavy emotional strain. 

Love is many things.  People love and breakup sometimes the come back together sometimes not.  True love is not always easy.  

HG knew JE for 15 plus years. Knew he was sensitive,knew how he felt about his family, the company and she knew his emotional make up.  

I miss SE but if I start to cry I will break down.

vs

I forgot that Kid.

Also

We have the scene  where he tells her they are like broken bolds and they have become weapons  to each other. 

Flowed by garden scene where he ask that they separate 

At anytime she could have just said her true feelings instead of prolonging it.

Later we hear it because she wanted JE to be strong but when your husband is breaking down and crying because he want some emotion from you?

Was that the best you can do?

JE was dealing with an HG who would

[lclarakl]

1 hour ago, Lmangla said:

 

kekeke... you really love BS don't you? well I won't blame you. in scandal, I was so enamored of the second lead MB and worried about his fate, that everyone on the forum laughingly referred to him as my puppy. hahahah   that said, it is not about whether BS is a better man or if he makes a better partner compared to JE. it is always been that JE made her heart thump, while BS was her friend. this writer never confuses the two in all her previous dramas and she has a healthy respect for friendships. in scandal, there was no triangle and the second lead and girl were friends from beginning to end. in all that glitters, the second lead was one crazy girl but the guy was always firm and clear -- sorry, you are not who I am interested in. so unless the writer dramatically changes her writing style, BS will remain her friend and he will know exactly where he stands till the end.

 

No doubt, BS is most definitely my little schmookiedoodle....

The point that I was making is that in order for a relationship to work, it has to be more than 'love'.  Without those other qualities, a relationship is doomed for failure.  Which is why JE and HK's marriage failed. It was missing several key elements to make it a good relationship. They drifted alone for years. When they finally encountered rough seas, they couldn't survive.  HK became someone that JE didn't like--he hated her.  Then seeing he new improved her, which he didn't do anything to try and make her a better person, he wanted her back.  That's conditional love to me.

I can see the writer bringing JE and HK back together and promising to do things differently. Just have to wonder, how long will it last. Second time around marriages have even a higher divorce rate than first time marriages---and that's without the initial divorcing due to cheating and losing a child in death.