[Drama 2015/2016] I Have A Lover 애인있어요

[trust71]

@DelroyB,@drmjs,@mdj101,@kfan7172,@Madra Rua,@tata555,@jadecloud,@Lmangla,@airgelaal

are you guy's live across the globe( western)......

when i wake in the morning, your exchanging of opinion , i find it so amusing,i enjoy reading it ...thank's to you guy. 

 

[DelroyB]

Another POV on the end of HK JE marriage.

I will say up front that clearly the lack of communication between them and the death of their daughter was the point, that finally accelerated the end , with the subsequent cheating by JE that ended the marriage. 

But I feel IMO based on what we have been shown in the episodes aired to date (end EP 20), that the marriage was already going downhill.  That JE had already given up, and that his great love was turning into being just OK.  We will only know for sure when/if the writer tells us.

I base above POV on the following scenes as I recall them.  If my recall is totally off base, I will go back over episodes and try to find the actual scene.

-- JE basically talked about having wanted to protect HK from going any further down the wrong path, but was unable to.

--- HK did not became the high level ruthless, unethical company layer Nicknamed the executioner in the short period of time after her daughters death (approximately 18 months??)   If we go on what we heard to date (not seen) her daughter died as a result of a man who felt he was falsely convicted and ruined by HK, who then after release from prison tried to run down and kill HK.

--- This leads me to believe that JE was either unsuccessful in trying to help her from not becoming that type of lawyer, never tried, or who paid no attention as this change in her occurred (he was too busy in his lab and happy not being pressured to join his fathers company, after all MH was happy having HK protect the company.)

-- I think it has been well documented that JE is a person who likes to care for people that he sees as needing protection.

--- After the birth of his daughter, and seeing how HK the lawyer already was (to him that is a person either no longer needing or deserving of his protection),  He then shifted all his love and protection to his daughter and basically gave up on HK.  As part of protecting his daughter he still wanted her to have her mother close.  So while he no longer had the great love he felt for the young innocent HK, he also did not have any great hate for HK.  

--With the death of his daughter came the great hate and feeling that the marriage was no longer needed -- no daughter, no marriage, move on to someone who needs his protection -- hello SR.

SIDE DISCUSSION 

What drives this need for JE to protect people that he feels needs his protection?
I think it goes back to his younger days in his family -- A discussion between MH and SH tells us that the discord between him and his father started at a young age (we don't know why, no scenes shown). He may have felt he had no one to protect him and this drives his desire to protect others?

 

I agree.  I would add that for a year JE had tried to get HK to open up and grieve.   HK would not and his view of her really changed then.

As I have said those we love and know the most are the ones hurt us the most.  HK knew what JE needed and what she needed.  However, I also think she did not listen or grieve to punish JE in small way for blaming her.  However, think she was also punishing her self.  She is emotional but like the seen where think about letting it all out to JE but takes the path of  coo, calm collected. Denying herself and JE the real person.  JE also fid not want to intimate  HK.  They lost all their closeness, physical, emotional, sexual.  Theres was marriage in name only.   Now we have the juxtaposition    4 years later where everyone see them married in spirt but not in name.

  

SR was a girl to JE at first.  It him giving shoes to protect like a kid.  She became his object of care.  HK in trying to protect her marriage drew him further away as she attacked what he cared for.   There is a lot more for both HK and JE to do for each other until they can be truly reconciled.

 

[ymiss]

Like I said at the beginning of the thread, @berny, I was able to leave, take a break from my husband for five days and four nights due to personal differences between us and not liking his family's life style! If our problem was, my problem with my husband was about him cheating, having an affair and such, oh gosh, I would leave him and never ever look back!

I applaud those women who would, could forgive their significant others after they cheated! I know a friend that continues to stay with her husband who cheats on her over and over again! I asked her why does she still stay with him and she answered it's because of their children! But knowing her for several years, I may say that she truly loves her husband, forgives him regardless of what he does!

Anyways, since this drama's touch on infidelity, first (broken) true love, forgiveness and so forth are pretty real in real life and Ji Jin Hee's portrayal of Jin Eun is just so way good, I guess I could look past Jin Eun's cheating ways and call it more than one chance fate between Jin Eun and Hae Kang!

[Guest my2centsworth]

@lmangla your post page 207 further discussing the difficulty the twins ( HK YK) will have in showing they are rightful heirs of their father and his patent.

The false patent transfer took place one day after his death, so that should only support their case that MPS stole the patent----This fact was part of the reason TS was able blackmail MH to get the Vice President position.  TS also discussed as part of his blackmail that MH killed the twins father on the hiking trip.  Not known to TS and MH --- HK overheard the entire conversation.  EP 9 at approximately 21 minutes.

Additional Note ---- BS when trying to help YK grandmother to see if the patent copy she had was worth any money from MPC, he was not smart enough or dig deep enough when researching the issue to realize this fact.  BS was a new lawyer at that time and per his character description graduated in last place.  IMO He helped the grandmother for free and put forth his best honest effort.  Others in The thread have criticized BS for this.

Don't take me wrong when I say this. I like BS and think he deep down a good guy, but I don't think he is a very good lawyer. Yes, he was fresh out of law school when he helped the grandmother and wasn't smart enough to know what "gold mine"  he had in his hands. And now 4 years later, his office is much nicer and it appears from the other desks that he may have another employee. Yet, it's HK/YK2 that does all the paperwork, investigating and legwork. She is even demonstrating for a client and BS goes to the office and sits behind his desk and shuffles papers. BS has a good heart and he helped many people, some for free, but with the help of HK/YK2.

I wonder if this issue with the rightful owner of the patent go to court and will BS represent the twins?

Edited November 5, 2015 by my2centsworth

[mdj101]

@jadecloud:... Thank you for the alternate translation of JE's "proposal"!  What a powerful, passionate confession of love that was as you brought to us.  That passionate love was in JJH's voice and in his delivery, as well!  But see what I will always miss in translation!      The actual meaning of JE's most sincere declarations are always eluding me!  No wonder I feel i don't understand what he expected from HK.

@Lmangla: even in the example you gave, the line from that film:..."from this moment, you are my property/wealth" --- It came to me that "you are my greatest treasure" might have fit well!  But that's how it is with subbing --- the best one can do at the time.    

And thank you @jadecloud, for posting the visual that followed that fiery love confession. Stark, painful contrast, indeed. And compounding that pitifully sad Hae Kang in that long rainy reverie is the very next scene --- a couple minutes of a flashback to HK/JE in their yard' anticipating the birth, and the sex, of their baby, while he compares their young love with the mature love they had then.  All of this in the first 6 minutes of Episode 7. I wanted to cry! And then to strangle Jin Eon!       To Hades with SR! And to burn in the deepest depths , too.

                                               *************************************

EDIT:.... Yes, @trust71, I am in the Western  hemisphere sure enough.  But on the NE Coast of the United States   (across the river from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania   but south of NYC and north of Washington, DC).    I get TV live online broadcasts of IHAL , my time,  at a time on my clock 11 hours later than they are on-air in Seoul, S.K. ( I. E., Their clock shows 10 PM but my clock shows 9 AM).   I am always curious where everyone lives!   I like to guess!

                                                **************************************

 When I was a child, the idea of watching the same live TV broadcast with people around the world was beyond all our imaginations!  So I'm overjoyed when people reveal how many corners of the world we are all seeing & talking about the same thing --- as you great guys recap live for us!  A phone call overseas  was  beyond my imagination back then.  Only in the movies!

So exciting to be alive today!           

I remember during the initial run of "Secret Love Affair" (JTBC, 2014)  we had contingents of posters from Australia, Europe, Africa, USA, Canada, Asia (for sure), South America (?  ---not sure) --- with groups appearing in pairs & small groups that were active together at opposite tines from the Westerners --- but then we would also talk to each other  "as one" somehow ---when the drama hit really "hot spots" of chatter between episodes!  My first Soompi Forum and always my best memory.  Like a "First Love".

 

Edited November 5, 2015 by mdj101

[chubbychub1966]

Time goes by too fast only ~3 more days till IHAL!!!  

I am waiting on some new stills.... @SBS 

@mdj101 OMG chingu I'm am also in NE region near you!!! 

Edited November 5, 2015 by chubbychub1966

[mdj101]

@DelroyB:... Appreciate your additional insight re: JE's and HK's failed efforts to resuscitate the dying marriage. As well as a look at how JE perceived SR initially --- and we saw how that concern evolved.

@my2centsworth:... I would love to see the twins  bring that precedent setting law suit back to BS.  Each twin has found their own support, protection,  and friendship in a relationship with good hearted  BS.    I wish for a law firm &/or satellite office (specialty in Labor Law for the Little Guy)  for BS and some kind of  "Life / Legal Coach" relationship with Lawyer Do Hae Kang later.   BS can grow!  Look at him --- he's maturing and evolving as we speak!

[Lmangla]

@airgelaal:...Good catch there!  I'm so used to thinking of her as a lab worker, I assumed she had a job.  But I think you are right.  As I'm typing I am remembering TS offering her a position at MNP.  She said something about "will consider it with the other offers she's received".

                     And isn't it true:..."Idle hands are the Devil's workshop!"   No way do I see her in need of a "Domestic Worker" --- insert flashing warning lights & roadside flares & Klaxon horns ( sounds like: awoogah!!  awoogah!!).

she doesn't look like the type to get satisfaction from cleaning a room! hahahah.... more like destroying a room is her standard when she gets stressed out.. well it would be rather boring to clean up the room herself after she had a meltdown.... so she does need a housekeeper!!

 

[Lmangla]

@Tata555 ~ thanks for your appreciation on the snow post and liking the "meat"; actually am not paying that close attention to dialogue in this drama and so it is fantastic that @mdj101 and @jadecloud are posting these snippets that make us re-think about what these characters are saying. the fun of a forum like this is people are from all over with different experiences and so the discussion can actually be even more entertaining than the drama itself. @trust71 ~ am actually sitting in Asia but depending on when I log in, I end up catching folks in North America either when they are ready to go to bed or when they are awake in the morning. the magic of time zones!

[Lmangla]

@lmangla your post on page 208 and 

1st question as a man does a man need to have his protective instincts fulfilled to be happy in a relationship-- I would say no -- in my teens and early 20s when dating, that was not something that was key in any of my dating relationships. Having married, of course both I and my wife wish to be protective of each other -- if anything, I think we are both happy when that need never arises.  Of course if you lose a child both you and wife would feel that you failed in protecting them.

2nd question -- All people are different and in this drama For JE I do see it as a driving factor and is part of why he is mad -- but of course this is where the lack of communication between HK and JE comes into play.  Had they shared their feelings better, JE would have know that for HK his being near her, not blaming her (not say he did openly, but I can see JR and his mother going after HK) allowing her her time to grieve  in silence is the best protection he could give her -- but they didn't talk and JE could only see his way of grieving was the right way, so yes his protective instinct was  not be fulfilled.  

thanks for answering my question so well @Kfan7172 ; a thought I had this morning was what if his protective instinct was an extension of his need to feel needed. did he feel unneeded or unwanted as a child? and does protecting someone make him feel needed? and since HK didn't need him, did he enjoy SR's attention as it looked like she needed him? and then after going around in circles, did he realize that he wasn't looking for someone to need him but he wanted HK to need him ~ was that what happened?

and here's a dicey question ~ curious to see how people respond. is a woman setting herself up for relationship failure if she fails to leave space for a man's protective instinct to flourish? as kfan7172 pointed out, all men are not the same but some men like JE do need their protective instinct to be fulfilled. so did HK fail to give him the space? was she too independent and failed to depend on him a little? or was there something that HK could have done to have the balance between independence and giving JE that fulfillment that he was needed?

[-jade-]

 

 2015/11/04 TENASIA: Official notice from SBS - Confirmation.  No early completion.

Brief:

On the 4th, SBS brushed aside rumors of shortening the run of 50 eps as planned for IHAL due to poor ratings, and also of another prolific writer Kim Soo Hyun's project taking over its time slot.  (YAY! Good news! LOVERS, get ready for a 50-ep journey as originally scheduled.  )

CR: As tagged

[mdj101]

@Lmangla: ... Your question  "Did HK fail to give JE space to satisfy his desire/need to give her his protection?"  Made me think!   Answer? Yes, HK missed an opportunity there!

 I was seeing a counselor r/t marriage issues.   He  repeatedly asked me a simple question: "Would you rather be happy? or right?"    Wouldn't explain what he was getting at.    Eventually I got it!  Like Hae Kang, I was determined to win the argument, prove my idea was better, etc.  Always up in my head, working the logic!  Always looking to win the argument,to be right!  

Maybe I could have been happier by a different route.... if I found the way to let go and let my husband give his warmth or protection.... if I could simply receive what he wanted to give (warmth, a hug, etc)...and relax, be happy for that moment in time.  Being happy TOGETHER would be better than just winning all the arguments!      

OK...kind of a vague description, I admit.  But I think it fits with the JE need to protect vs HK's need to impose logic on whatever problem or issue they may be facing!

Edited November 5, 2015 by mdj101

[-jade-]

 

 

11/04/2015 NEWS JOINS - What's with the early ending talk for the drama?

Brief: 
Talks of early broadcast ending of IHAL due to low ratings, and of another well-known writer Kim Soo Hyiun's upcoming new project possibly taking over its time slot,  were dismissed by SBS. 

An official from SBS, on the 4th,  said there will be no change in the plan for a 50 episodes run. That is for certain. Moreover, there is still so much for viewers to look forward to - the relationship journey of CJE and DHK, the heartbreak of BS, the anger of SR on CJE, the relationship line of DYK and MGS, etc. These are plot developments that will stimulate the interests of viewers, and bring about possible huge increases in ratings.

(oh wow! the main takeaway for me from this article, that GS and YK will have a relationship (love?) line....ohhhh can't wait! )

 

CR: JOINS

[-jade-]

11/04/2015 ASIAE - Early Ending of IHAL? Just A Rumor.

There has been no discussion regarding an early ending of IHAL, an SBS broadcasting official commented.

CR: ASIAE

[zagigirl]

 

11/04/2015 NEWS JOINS - What's with the early ending talk for the drama?

Brief: 
Talks of early broadcast ending of IHAL due to low ratings, and of another well-known writer Kim Soo Hyiun's upcoming new project possibly taking over its time slot,  were dismissed by SBS. 

An official from SBS, on the 4th,  said there will be no change in the plan for a 50 episodes run. That is for certain. Moreover, there is still so much for viewers to look forward to - the relationship journey of CJE and DHK, the heartbreak of BS, the anger of SR on CJE, the relationship line of DYK and MGS, etc. These are plot developments that will stimulate the interests of viewers, and bring about possible huge increases in ratings.

(oh wow! the main takeaway for me from this article, that GS and YK will have a relationship (love?) line....ohhhh can't wait! )

Love...love...love ...that's it...give me those love lines...spice it with SR's anger and i'll be happy ...and if writer can maintain the drama this intense even better

[trust71]

THE RELATIONSHIP LINE OF DYK AND MGS...

GOOD THAT THEY HAVE A LOVELINE

DYK AND HER DAUGHTER WILL SPICE UP HIS LIFE .

[Lmangla]

@jadecloud:... Thank you for the alternate translation of JE's "proposal"!  What a powerful, passionate confession of love that was as you brought to us.  That passionate love was in JJH's voice and in his delivery, as well!  But see what I will always miss in translation!      The actual meaning of JE's most sincere declarations are always eluding me!  No wonder I feel i don't understand what he expected from HK.

@Lmangla: even in the example you gave, the line from that film:..."from this moment, you are my property/wealth" --- It came to me that "you are my greatest treasure" might have fit well!  But that's how it is with subbing --- the best one can do at the time.    

And thank you @jadecloud, for posting the visual that followed that fiery love confession. Stark, painful contrast, indeed. And compounding that pitifully sad Hae Kang in that long rainy reverie is the very next scene --- a couple minutes of a flashback to HK/JE in their yard' anticipating the birth, and the sex, of their baby, while he compares their young love with the mature love they had then.  All of this in the first 6 minutes of Episode 7. I wanted to cry! And then to strangle Jin Eon!       To Hades with SR! And to burn in the deepest depths , too.

                                               *************************************

makes sense @mdj101! don't know why I didn't translate the line as treasure. in my language, property is treasure and given the ridiculous land prices and # of people per sq km, getting a good property is not easy. but in english, because of the historical context of slavery, saying someone is your property gives off that master-slave vibes. so while it was a dreamy line in my language, if a guy said that to me in english, I would probably slap him! hahahah..... @jadecloud ~ the csubs you mentioned has him talking about ox and ox tail soup. since ox is a farm animal for work and ox tail soup is nutritious, is he saying something like "I will work hard to provide whatever you need and will ensure that you are surrounded in goodness"?

"I love you DHK. I'm saying I love you. I'm saying I love you, fool. Marry me please. Marry me!  

Work me like your ox. Use me up like you would stew bones for all of its goodness.

I will protect you. I will always stay by your side.

Your life, every day of DHK's life, I will  purpose as treasures and fill up my life."

(Translation/X-ref : TSKS csubs)

[zagigirl]

@lmangla your post on page 208 and 

1st question as a man does a man need to have his protective instincts fulfilled to be happy in a relationship-- I would say no -- in my teens and early 20s when dating, that was not something that was key in any of my dating relationships. Having married, of course both I and my wife wish to be protective of each other -- if anything, I think we are both happy when that need never arises.  Of course if you lose a child both you and wife would feel that you failed in protecting them.

2nd question -- All people are different and in this drama For JE I do see it as a driving factor and is part of why he is mad -- but of course this is where the lack of communication between HK and JE comes into play.  Had they shared their feelings better, JE would have know that for HK his being near her, not blaming her (not say he did openly, but I can see JR and his mother going after HK) allowing her her time to grieve  in silence is the best protection he could give her -- but they didn't talk and JE could only see his way of grieving was the right way, so yes his protective instinct was  not be fulfilled.  

thanks for answering my question so well @Kfan7172 ; a thought I had this morning was what if his protective instinct was an extension of his need to feel needed. did he feel unneeded or unwanted as a child? and does protecting someone make him feel needed? and since HK didn't need him, did he enjoy SR's attention as it looked like she needed him? and then after going around in circles, did he realize that he wasn't looking for someone to need him but he wanted HK to need him ~ was that what happened?

and here's a dicey question ~ curious to see how people respond. is a woman setting herself up for relationship failure if she fails to leave space for a man's protective instinct to flourish? as kfan7172 pointed out, all men are not the same but some men like JE do need their protective instinct to be fulfilled. so did HK fail to give him the space? was she too independent and failed to depend on him a little? or was there something that HK could have done to have the balance between independence and giving JE that fulfillment that he was needed?

Hmmm...i think that, in general, that men still have a need, or think they need to be stronger then women, by nature and to be the main one to protect...even if they're aware that women did get stronger and stronger over the years, i think that this will never really change...and they do have kind of a fear of strong woman

As for JE...in this i think he was, coz of his pain, the opposite...he needed HK to find comfort for his deep pain...but as HK wan't able coz of her own nad as strong as she is...they get drifted away...JE's pain and need turned to disappointment and anger...when HK realized it...it was to late

[trust71]

@lmangla your post on page 208 and 

1st question as a man does a man need to have his protective instincts fulfilled to be happy in a relationship-- I would say no -- in my teens and early 20s when dating, that was not something that was key in any of my dating relationships. Having married, of course both I and my wife wish to be protective of each other -- if anything, I think we are both happy when that need never arises.  Of course if you lose a child both you and wife would feel that you failed in protecting them.

2nd question -- All people are different and in this drama For JE I do see it as a driving factor and is part of why he is mad -- but of course this is where the lack of communication between HK and JE comes into play.  Had they shared their feelings better, JE would have know that for HK his being near her, not blaming her (not say he did openly, but I can see JR and his mother going after HK) allowing her her time to grieve  in silence is the best protection he could give her -- but they didn't talk and JE could only see his way of grieving was the right way, so yes his protective instinct was  not be fulfilled.  

thanks for answering my question so well @Kfan7172 ; a thought I had this morning was what if his protective instinct was an extension of his need to feel needed. did he feel unneeded or unwanted as a child? and does protecting someone make him feel needed? and since HK didn't need him, did he enjoy SR's attention as it looked like she needed him? and then after going around in circles, did he realize that he wasn't looking for someone to need him but he wanted HK to need him ~ was that what happened?

and here's a dicey question ~ curious to see how people respond. is a woman setting herself up for relationship failure if she fails to leave space for a man's protective instinct to flourish? as kfan7172 pointed out, all men are not the same but some men like JE do need their protective instinct to be fulfilled. so did HK fail to give him the space? was she too independent and failed to depend on him a little? or was there something that HK could have done to have the balance between independence and giving JE that fulfillment that he was needed?

Hmmm...i think that, in general, that men still have a need, or think they need to be stronger then women, by nature and to be the main one to protect...even if they're aware that women did get stronger and stronger over the years, i think that this will never really change...and they do have kind of a fear of strong woman

As for JE...in this i think he was, coz of his pain, the opposite...he needed HK to find comfort for his deep pain...but as HK wan't able coz of her own nad as strong as she is...they get drifted away...JE's pain and need turned to disappointment and anger...when HK realized it...it was to late

THAT WHY JE  say SHOW IT if you are  IN PAIN ....I DONT REMEMBER W/C EP.

[Lmangla]

@Lmangla: ... Your question  "Did HK fail to give JE space to satisfy his desire/need to give her his protection?"  Made me think!   Answer? Yes, HK missed an opportunity there!

 I was seeing a counselor r/t marriage issues.   He  repeatedly asked me a simple question: "Would you rather be happy? or right?"    Wouldn't explain what he was getting at.    Eventually I got it!  Like Hae Kang, I was determined to win the argument, prove my idea was better, etc.  Always up in my head, working the logic!  Always looking to win the argument,to be right!  

Maybe I could have been happier by a different route.... if I found the way to let go and let my husband give his warmth or protection.... if I could simply receive what he wanted to give (warmth, a hug, etc)...and relax, be happy for that moment in time.  Being happy TOGETHER would be better than just winning all the arguments!      

OK...kind of a vague description, I admit.  But I think it fits with the JE need to protect vs HK's need to impose logic on whatever problem or issue they may be facing!

not vague at all @mdj101; totally makes sense and the question the counselor asked makes me think hard about myself and reflect.

what I like about HK is that she always has been a strong woman. she is not one of those whiny women who is sitting there, crying buckets of tears and helpless. instead, she helps herself for the most part and is going on with her life even though she has amnesia. but is her strength also a weakness? while BS sounds whiny for saying "stand where I can see you", if JE said that, would we still consider it as a weakness or just him expressing his protective instinct? when is a man's protective instinct a lighthouse instead of an imposition/jail? is it dependent on how we as a woman feel about him? or is it dependent on the level of trust we have in him?