Help My Friend Get Rid Of An Admirer

[Blu3Wind]

It's not me, it's my friend. Please HELP!

This is a problem that girl A is facing.

(I’m not allowed to tell who she is from the person herself! >.<)

So there is this boy who likes girl A, for 3 or 4 years now (or maybe more).

But she doesn’t have any interest in him at all. And to make it even worse, the guy was *ahem* ugly, fat, smells, bad personality, disgusting & etc… This really made her feel like crying since she was so desperate to ‘get rid’ of him. The guy is also really shy and doesn’t make any direct moves on her, but can like randomly text message her to show he cares, but in a way disgust girl A as well.

Like for example, there is like this examination at school that was difficult.

After every test ended, he just HAD to go and ask her: “Could you do the test?”, whereby she will answer a “No…” with a heavy feeling.

It did not stop there though, it happened for the whole week, which really started to annoy her. She finally yelled at him to make him stop and succeeded… for 1 day only… He started doing it again right after that.

The annoying thing is the class she’s in. Her classmates are all like really.. you know… ^^

Most of the guys are ignorant about this, but the girls in her class are those typical girls who like to talk about people behind their back, act sweet in front of them but in fact aren’t, loud, noisy & etc. Their class doesn’t like this guy either, and yet they like to pair him up with Girl A. Girl A really hates this.. Well, who doesn’t? Imagine YOUrself getting paired up with one of the persons you hate the most.

(Yes, she has come to the stage where she hates the guy)

She told the guy many times that she did not like him, but did it in a soft way. She was not harsh enough, and maybe that didn’t get her point across? But still, the guy now still likes her..

Now me and my other friends suggested some other solutions for her..

1. Go berserk and tell them all to quit

The problem is that she has the image of the quiet girl in the class and wants to maintain this. Besides, it will be like her against the whole class, so even if she started yelling, her class would probably just start laughing and make fun of it.

2. Fake a tear

The problem is once again, because of her class. They are the type of people who doesn’t have any sympathy. So even is he cries, they would go “What? Like why the hell is she crying? How lame~” instead of feeling sorry. So that’s out of the options as well.

3. Pretend to have an imaginary boyfriend

Okay, she tried this and pretended to have a ‘fake’ boyfriend. Some of they believed it, while some didn’t. But this doesn’t seem to work because it wasn’t convincing enough or they totally forgot about it again. And at the end, the guy never stopped liking her.

4. Pretend to have a fake real-life boyfriend

With this I mean like ask one of my friend to pretend to be dating her. And one of my friend is willing to do that as well. But at the end she was the one who couldn’t did it since it would be too mushy and everything..

I’m really not good at explaining this..

The real problem is far worse than what’s written here.

If anyone can help her get rid of this guy, please help!

Anything is welcome!

[Guest yamaki_LOVE]

W0W I'm scwared myself ^^;

Why don't she try & switch class, yu know?

Wait is this girl a HS student or a JUNI0R?

There's rweally nothing yu can do if some guy admirers yu, I guess trying to get a REAL BOYFRIEND would be better , she doesn't like n e guyys??

[Guest aaaaaallaaoeaa]

I think its time for ure friend to actually get her message across. tell her to do it in a harsch way. 'I'm sorry, but I'm just not into you, ure not my type, i don't like you, pls stay away from me, if you continue to be like this, i will get a restraining order." lol

[Guest mikomi]

If you want the message to get across, tell him in front of EVERYONE in your class, " leave me alone. stop texting me, calling me, following me. This is harassment and this is the LAST time I will tell you this or I'm going to the police for harassment." Then, you go to the school principal ( assuming you guys are still in school) and tell him what happened and let him know that this is making you VERY uncomfortable and you demand that something is done for your safety. You might be able to get him to move the guy away to a different class.

It's been a few years since I've been in highschool, but trust me on this one, I've been through the legal system junk for the under 18 and you should definitely have your rear end covered in any situation- get the principal involved and just mention that you feel like you are being harassed and unsafe...and by you, I meant your friend. goodluck!

edit+

if you can prove that he is doing this because he 'likes' you and he's ever asked you out on a date, ect. You can also file it for sexual harassment.

[Clix]

I think its time for ure friend to actually get her message across. tell her to do it in a harsch way. 'I'm sorry, but I'm just not into you, ure not my type, i don't like you, pls stay away from me, if you continue to be like this, i will get a restraining order." lol

Troof. It's time to lay the law down. No more nice considerate talks.

[Guest arianna90]

your friend can be harsh but if she doesnt prefer that, she can fake a real boyfriend, or even get a real one. that guy would totally back off. thats what i think. it's really up to her to decide.

[Guest cheerydumdum]

your friend needs to really just get over the mushiness or wutever of having a fake real boyfriend and just DO IT! if she doesn't like any of the plans then how will she ever get rid of the guy? she should probably go and try to talk to him one more time though. and maybe be a bit more harsh about it. and then if he still bugs her, then she should go and get a fake real boyfriend.

[Guest Meenuh]

Lol. This whole thing is like a bad movie.

[Guest kiss_bunny]

the last option is great. they dont have to pretend to the mushy ^___^

[Guest 小甜密]

Lol. This whole thing is like a bad movie.

HAHA. True that.

[Guest Harbl]

Wow! Fat, ugly, bad personality, disgusting and smells?

He sounds like a catch and a half, your friend better get in there quick if she knows whats good for her. I bet that dudes beating the ladies away with whatever he can find.

[Guest chocopiesarang]

thanks for liking me but good day ^^

[angelicXD]

lol I remember in hs, this white boy kept pestering me. yelling "hi" to me in the hall way where so many people are there. it's embarrassing. i don't even like the guy. i was so mean to him. hahaha quite funny actually, cuz he was like i'm so mean. even my teacher was like i'm the mean girl. haha fun class in that class but i have two class with him. i just totally ignored him. one time he kept throwing paper to me and giving me his phone number. i just threw it away. lmao then he would wrote letter, saying i'm so fine and i just threw it away. he even give me one of his senior picture to me and tell me to call him sometimes. what makes him think i'll call him? the guy sit behind me too. he kept kicking my chair for a couple of days I got enough so I moved. I also tell him to stop bothering me because I can just report for sexual harassment because what he did and write those letter to me, I can proved it. just roll my eyes....

so my best advice is just to be mean, I'm a quiet girl too, when I get mad the classroom laugh. lol but you got to do something. so just continue to be mean and ignore him. totally tell him there is no way, in the future that she will date him or like him. I endure it till graduation. sometimes you just got to give the ultimatum.

the last choice is good..you don't have to be all mushy, just maybe him picking her up after school the most or sometimes just tell her to keep talking about the so call boyfriend in school. You know, let it spread all around. lol

[Guest heyitzthatfc]

What's so funny about being mean?

You don't have to "think" of ways to get this guy away and half of them being somehow to crush the guy? You guys are cold.

Just tell him you don't like him, you don't have to add the get away from me, no interest in you, just say, I. Don't. Like. You.

[Guest lolimois]

Just tell her to be mean to him because that's how she really feels about him. I'm sure he would get the hint pretty soon if she wasn't being a coward o_O

[Guest heyitzthatfc]

Just tell her to be mean to him because that's how she really feels about him. I'm sure he would get the hint pretty soon if she wasn't being a coward o_O

You guys act mean to other people because that's how you feel about them?

[Guest -One-]

Just get your friend to confront him. I know she probably has, but let her say what she feels. Like "You know you're really scaring me, i don't like it. I know you like me and all but how can i like you back if i feel that your a threat to me. I'm not trying to sound harsh but this is my feeling"

i would like to add in, "can we just start all over and be friends" but it seems like theirs alot of hatred for him. But i'm sure the guy doesnt have it easy as well.

[damyoungji]

I went through a similar situation like this before, but it only lasted for a few months. It was a student who barely knew me.

At first, I was not harsh about it towards him, until he started following me around school and will randomly try to touch me or hug me.

I was at the point where I will push him away and yell "ew!", but he still wouldn't get it. He kept on going on with it and told people that he liked me.

He finally stopped when someone indicated that I was "dating someone" (which was not true).

&& when his friends started asking him what was up with him and not leaving me alone - he denied it LOL

All it took was saying that I was dating someone and to get his friends to pester him, and he stopped bothering and following me.

[Blu3Wind]

Wow..

I didn't expect so many replies..

Thanks!!!

To all those who agreed with option 4..

The problem really is with her..

She is indeed not so interested in boys (as in, she doesn't want to think about relationships yet & etc)

And every lovey dovey actions either in movies, comics or whatsoever always makes her get the chills

So I understand why she wouldn't be able to do it..

I know she has to get over it, but if someone just can't, it's really difficult.

To all those who said she should be harsher

I totally agree with this and I continously told her that she should..

The problem is that she once again, can't.

Like yesterday, the guy was text messaging her and her still replied..

When I asked why, she said that it's because she didn't feel good if she didn't reply!

I think that she's too patient to really yell at him..

I'll let her read your messages though and hope she can DO something about it!!

Why don't she try & switch class, yu know?

Wait is this girl a HS student or a JUNI0R?

It's a little different here at my school..

She's in the tenth grade, but it's like divided into the science and commerce stream..

Either you're in science or in commerce.. (yeah, it's annoying)

So she cannot switch classes..

Then, you go to the school principal ( assuming you guys are still in school) and tell him what happened and let him know that this is making you VERY uncomfortable and you demand that something is done for your safety.

lol.. Good idea actually.. XD

The problem is that he's not really harrassing her but just annoying her till death..

And this is a problem that shouldn't involve the school principle..

She's also a closed person, thats why I'm the one asking you guys for help instead of her doing it herself..

Lol. This whole thing is like a bad movie.

Hahah.. True..

Only in the movie, the girl would fall in love with her fake real life boyfriend~

i would like to add in, "can we just start all over and be friends" but it seems like theirs alot of hatred for him. But i'm sure the guy doesnt have it easy as well.

Haha.. Yeah, she HATES him...

She even gave him a nickname with a negative meaning XD

@damyoungji:

But she doesn't have a lot of friends in her class since most of her classmates are.. yeah, you know..

(I'm a senior to her and our class are far away from each other)

And when she once she had a boyfriend, it wasn't really useful.. ^^a

@angelicXD:

Yup..

I'll try to tell her to just go ahead and be mean..

Who knows they might start to fear her! XD

@heyitzthatfc:

It's different..

This guy just doesn't get the clue..

Tell him nicely, and he will still go and chase her..

[Guest mikomi]

Wow..

I didn't expect so many replies..

Thanks!!!

To all those who agreed with option 4..

The problem really is with her..

She is indeed not so interested in boys (as in, she doesn't want to think about relationships yet & etc)

And every lovey dovey actions either in movies, comics or whatsoever always makes her get the chills

So I understand why she wouldn't be able to do it..

I know she has to get over it, but if someone just can't, it's really difficult.

To all those who said she should be harsher

I totally agree with this and I continously told her that she should..

The problem is that she once again, can't.

Like yesterday, the guy was text messaging her and her still replied..

When I asked why, she said that it's because she didn't feel good if she didn't reply!

I think that she's too patient to really yell at him..

I'll let her read your messages though and hope she can DO something about it!!

It's a little different here at my school..

She's in the tenth grade, but it's like divided into the science and commerce stream..

Either you're in science or in commerce.. (yeah, it's annoying)

So she cannot switch classes..

lol.. Good idea actually.. XD

The problem is that he's not really harrassing her but just annoying her till death..

And this is a problem that shouldn't involve the school principle..

She's also a closed person, thats why I'm the one asking you guys for help instead of her doing it herself..

Hahah.. True..

Only in the movie, the girl would fall in love with her fake real life boyfriend~

Haha.. Yeah, she HATES him...

She even gave him a nickname with a negative meaning XD

@damyoungji:

But she doesn't have a lot of friends in her class since most of her classmates are.. yeah, you know..

(I'm a senior to her and our class are far away from each other)

And when she once she had a boyfriend, it wasn't really useful.. ^^a

@angelicXD:

Yup..

I'll try to tell her to just go ahead and be mean..

Who knows they might start to fear her! XD

@heyitzthatfc:

It's different..

This guy just doesn't get the clue..

Tell him nicely, and he will still go and chase her..

actually, if she doesn't want him around her and she has told him before, it's considered harassment. Actually, you can say this is sexual harassment. Of course, using the principal should be the last resort but keep that in mind and let her know b/c they will definitely be able to help you. The kind of harassment you think of and what the legal system considers harassment is different because say you told the principal that this guy is harassing you or you feel unsafe and he brushed it off b/c he thought it wasnt a big deal,....he will probabaly lose his job. Good luck though!!

edit++ You can also tell the guidance councelor for help. She is obligated to help if she thinks you are in danger, but if you ask her to keep it a secret from others, she is obligated to keep it a secret. My best friend used to get abused in middle school, and we went to the guidance councelor everyweek. It helped a lot and she never pressured my friend into telling someone- only if she was ready