Ask The Ladies - Read First Post

[Guest soulbeater]

So there's this guy, and we both have English together

He's a football player and he, I guess, is pretty popular in school--(anyways; back to the topic)

Tomorrow is our School's Homecoming Dance, what am I to do if I were to catch him eyeing at me--(I think he has staring problems)

I tend to get weak legs when I'm around him and also butterflies--Yes, I'm somewhat really inexperienced when I'm in a position like this

I love to dance too, so how will it be possible for me to just try and ignore him--also, I'm scared like what if we were partnered up to slow dance (something my school does)

Please answer my question as I am really inexperienced and confused---

-soulbeater

[Guest PinkWaffles]

This isn't about romance or anything, but I'd like some help about this situation

There is this girl who is in 4 of my classes. I've never had a class with her before until this year. And I've noticed that I catch her looking at me a lot? It's not like a glance look, it's more like a cut eye (glare?) and she seems to not like me very much.

Last week, for one of my classes, we had to choose topics and stuff. I was doing my project individually because I didn't know anyone in the class. Anyway, I was chosen to choose the topic first. When she & her partner got chosen to choose their topic, the teacher told them it was taken already by me, and then they had to choose another one. Afterwards, when class was over and I was leaving the classroom, I saw her and her partner whispering to each other and looking at me..

I told my best friend about this and she said that she doesn't know her extremely well but thinks that she is just like that, like she doesn't mean to seem mean.

However, recently I found her twitter off a mutual friend we have and one of her tweets were like "Omg this ___, thanks for stealing the topic."

I didn't intentionally take her topic, I didn't know she wanted it and I was chosen first..

Do you think she hates me?? I don't get why she hates me when I didn't really do anything to her I feel really intimidated by her now.

Really? She's going to get so upset over you taking a topic and then have to twitter it?  Goes to show how much power you have over her.

Obviously. she's the one that's intimidated by you- you don't need to fear her.  Who knows why she's acting this way, just shrug it off and ace that project!

^__^b

[lilliums]

So there's this guy, and we both have English togetherHe's a football player and he, I guess, is pretty popular in school--(anyways; back to the topic)Tomorrow is our School's Homecoming Dance, what am I to do if I were to catch him eyeing at me--(I think he has staring problems)I tend to get weak legs when I'm around him and also butterflies--Yes, I'm somewhat really inexperienced when I'm in a position like thisI love to dance too, so how will it be possible for me to just try and ignore him--also, I'm scared like what if we were partnered up to slow dance (something my school does)Please answer my question as I am really inexperienced and confused----soulbeater

I know it will be hard, but just try to act natural and have fun! I don't think you should ignore him, just be friendly if you guys happen to be partnered up! Have you guys chatted before?

[Guest soulbeater]

I know it will be hard, but just try to act natural and have fun! I don't think you should ignore him, just be friendly if you guys happen to be partnered up! Have you guys chatted before?

Thanks! I really appreciated your response. I will.--Well, we've only talked once and after that: we both ignored each other. I think its due to my response when we first talk and met. I accidentally stole his seat in class, and I also glared at him after he asked me to give up "my" seat--which was actually his..Yeahh---

-soulbeater

[wengfrecrixs]

I am talking with a girl and someday she suddenly ask me " do you have girlfriend ? I don't have boyfriend , I want a kind and handsome boyfriend " 

Did she said it on purpose or maybe I am over sensitive ? 

I don't know cuz i never date before 

[Guest knockblock]

Anyone think they can help me out?

I'm going to need help to come up with ways and muster up the courage.

It's about going up to a random girl and talking to her. I know I can do this but something just stops me.

More details on this in a bit.

[mr.nobody]

Well, the story is, me and a girl have been noticing each other for a while because she works in the gym where i exercise. We have only said hello to each other a few times until today. Today, i initiated our first conversation with each other by asking her questions. I started with asking her name, and following up with questions such as; how many days she works in a week and how long she has been work there. I think i gave her a bad impression because the conversation sounds almost as if i was interviewing her. So the question is, how badly did i screwed up? It seems like both of us were pretty nervous when we talked.

[Guest soulbeater]

I am talking with a girl and someday she suddenly ask me " do you have girlfriend ? I don't have boyfriend*quoted image* , I want a kind and handsome boyfriend " 

Did she said it on purpose or maybe I am over sensitive ? 

I don't know cuz i never date before *quoted image*

She seems as if she's interested in you. It clearly states in between the line. Though you've never dated, the least you could do is be friendly towards her. Wait for your emotions to grow upon her of how you feel towards her, and afterwards, confess to her of how you also feel, whether you feel the same or not.

It's okay for you to not have dated before. Just act like yourself upon her and just be patient of how you develop your feelings. 

The message she sent towards you seems as if she's interested, yet somewhat insecure.  Get to know her well enough, study her and find out her ways of acting towards other men. It'll throw out a hint of whether she's only looking for LOVE or ATTENTION--- I hope this will help you!

-soulbeater

[Guest PinkWaffles]

Well, the story is, me and a girl have been noticing each other for a while because she works in the gym where i exercise. We have only said hello to each other a few times until today. Today, i initiated our first conversation with each other by asking her questions. I started with asking her name, and following up with questions such as; how many days she works in a week and how long she has been work there. I think i gave her a bad impression because the conversation sounds almost as if i was interviewing her. So the question is, how badly did i screwed up? It seems like both of us were pretty nervous when we talked.

It really all depends on the girls' personality.  If it were me, I think I might have been a little annoyed but, that's only because I tend to go to the gym to blow off my stress (I'm a rage work-out-er~ If that made any sense(?)) so, if I had some guy playing '20 questions' with me about trivial things- I'd think something was wrong with him not getting to the point of the conversation.

But, don't deflate just yet; I know plenty of my girl friends that go to the gym to meet cute guys and they get pretty flattered when guys come up to them and start chit-chatting.

Next time, instead of asking "going no where"  questions to peak her interest- ask her if she'd like to grab lunch after the gym.  

You: "Hey, I've noticed that you're here often-around the same time I come."

*Saying something along the lines of this let's her know that you enjoy coming to the gym (something in common) and that you notice her- great start.*

Her: "Yeah, it's the best time to come/I work here." 

You: "Sorry, I didn't get to tell you my name- I'm _____."

*Giving out your name is a perfect way to get a bit personal with a stranger and it shows that you want some sort of relation with this person in the future.*

Her: "I'm ________."

You: "Nice meeting you, ______ and if you want, maybe we could grab some lunch after the gym- I know a great place that serves fresh _________; my treat."

*Just keep it simple and to the point- let the jabber happen later when she can focus on you and you only.  No chick wants to get picked up while thinking about shedding that Krispy Kreme donut she ate last night!  Or even when she's working~T__T;;*

I'm not saying it's going to be like that but, just for reference purposes.  Also, after you invite her, make sure you linger around, like say on a treadmill next to her so that she keeps you in mind.

I would say that you have a pretty good chance if you manage to get her out to lunch or out to any type of function away from the gym.

Just be sweet and you'll soar with flying colors~ ^__^b

[wengfrecrixs]

She seems as if she's interested in you. It clearly states in between the line. Though you've never dated, the least you could do is be friendly towards her. Wait for your emotions to grow upon her of how you feel towards her, and afterwards, confess to her of how you also feel, whether you feel the same or not.

It's okay for you to not have dated before. Just act like yourself upon her and just be patient of how you develop your feelings. 

The message she sent towards you seems as if she's interested, yet somewhat insecure.  Get to know her well enough, study her and find out her ways of acting towards other men. It'll throw out a hint of whether she's only looking for LOVE or ATTENTION--- I hope this will help you!

-soulbeater

wow ! thank you! Now I know what to do 

[mr.nobody]

It really all depends on the girls' personality.  If it were me, I think I might have been a little annoyed but, that's only because I tend to go to the gym to blow off my stress (I'm a rage work-out-er~ If that made any sense(?)) so, if I had some guy playing '20 questions' with me about trivial things- I'd think something was wrong with him not getting to the point of the conversation.

But, don't deflate just yet; I know plenty of my girl friends that go to the gym to meet cute guys and they get pretty flattered when guys come up to them and start chit-chatting.

Next time, instead of asking "going no where"  questions to peak her interest- ask her if she'd like to grab lunch after the gym.  

You: "Hey, I've noticed that you're here often-around the same time I come."

*Saying something along the lines of this let's her know that you enjoy coming to the gym (something in common) and that you notice her- great start.*

Her: "Yeah, it's the best time to come/I work here." 

You: "Sorry, I didn't get to tell you my name- I'm _____."

*Giving out your name is a perfect way to get a bit personal with a stranger and it shows that you want some sort of relation with this person in the future.*

Her: "I'm ________."

You: "Nice meeting you, ______ and if you want, maybe we could grab some lunch after the gym- I know a great place that serves fresh _________; my treat."

*Just keep it simple and to the point- let the jabber happen later when she can focus on you and you only.  No chick wants to get picked up while thinking about shedding that Krispy Kreme donut she ate last night!  Or even when she's working~T__T;;*

I'm not saying it's going to be like that but, just for reference purposes.  Also, after you invite her, make sure you linger around, like say on a treadmill next to her so that she keeps you in mind.

I would say that you have a pretty good chance if you manage to get her out to lunch or out to any type of function away from the gym.

Just be sweet and you'll soar with flying colors~ ^__^b

thanks, i will certainly consider your advice if i havent scared her off yet.

[Guest o________O]

I'm pretty sure I know the answer to this, but here goes~

What reason would a girl have to completely change a topic, I saw a girl friend of mine randomly and we just talked for about 2mins before we both went our way. Later, I texted her saying "You looked nice today " and then instead of responding to this, she came out with something completely unrelated like "Finished with class for today!".

A sign of disinterest?

[Guest ladyluckk]

^ It's a possibility. Or, she could be one of the people who can't take compliments well. I know some people can feel really awkward when they're given a compliment! Maybe she didn't know how to respond, so she decided to change the topic =P

[Guest knockblock]

When I see a girl that I think looks good I wish I could go talk to her but I hesitate. I'm stopped because I'm cautious of the possibility of her having a boyfriend already. I get the sense that if I approach a girl who tells me she has a boyfriend I should know my place. Furthermore, I can't charge in without having some kind of plan and being careful about it.

If she says she has a boyfriend, is she most likely telling the truth? It's better for me to let it die and leave right?

Could there be a possibility that she is just saying that?

[Guest Alyka]

When  I see a girl that I think looks good I wish I could go talk to her but I  hesitate. I'm stopped because I'm cautious of the possibility of her  having a boyfriend already. I get the sense that if I approach a girl  who tells me she has a boyfriend I should know my place. Furthermore, I  can't charge in without having some kind of plan and being careful about  it.

If she says she has a boyfriend, is she most likely telling the truth? It's better for me to let it die and leave right?

Could there be a possibility that she is just saying that?

If you see someone you're interested in, definitely approach her. Who  knows what could happen from there on? If you're always thinking that  she's probably already taken, you're never gonna get a chance. In the  case that she does mention that she has a boyfriend, at least you tried, but yes, you should still back off... unless you're hoping for that  booty call. (just kidding~)

Though you can leave her with  your number if she doesn't mind. That's what my  brother did with his current girlfriend and it was successful in his case. When he met her, she already  had a boyfriend, but he left his number with her and said, "Call me when you break up with him". I thought that was very arrogant of him, but sure enough, two~three  months later, guess who called?

And yes, there is a  possibility that she is using the "I have a boyfriend" thing as an excuse, but you should take that as a sign to move on. Personally, I use that excuse as an easy escape when I'm not interested in someone or not interested in  having a relationship at the moment--the guy usually gets the message.

[Guest PinkWaffles]

When I see a girl that I think looks good I wish I could go talk to her but I hesitate. I'm stopped because I'm cautious of the possibility of her having a boyfriend already. I get the sense that if I approach a girl who tells me she has a boyfriend I should know my place. Furthermore, I can't charge in without having some kind of plan and being careful about it.

If she says she has a boyfriend, is she most likely telling the truth? It's better for me to let it die and leave right?

Could there be a possibility that she is just saying that?

Well, you have a 50/50 chance so, why not give it a try before giving up?  You never know.

You make a good assumption that girls sometimes lie about their relationship status:  I do this all the time because it's the quickest way to tell the guy I'm not interested without going into the fine details as to why I don't want to start anything- big or small.  I wouldn't take it personally because everyone is in a different place when it comes to relationship readiness so, if she declines just accept it and move on.

[Guest chibifish622]

Hey ladies,

So today I was eating lunch with a friend and I see this girl eating there as well. I don't know her but I know of her if that makes sense (friend's old roommate). Anyways I had a crush on her (she has an awesome smile) a few years ago but never did anything. Anyways my question is would it be weird if a guy came up to you that you didn't know and said hello (while her friends are there)?

[Guest likelovers]

Hey ladies,

So today I was eating lunch with a friend and I see this girl eating there as well. I don't know her but I know of her if that makes sense (friend's old roommate). Anyways I had a crush on her (she has an awesome smile) a few years ago but never did anything. Anyways my question is would it be weird if a guy came up to you that you didn't know and said hello (while her friends are there)?

Honestly, yes it would be kind of weird if we had never been acquainted with before ahaha

[Guest A_Star296]

Okay so I was at my cousins place this weekend for her wedding and her hubby introduced me to one of his friends. They've been trying to set me up with him for agesss but this was the first time I met him. He was quite shy at first which I found hilarious but because I was (slightly) drunk I kinda made him talk. Anyway, we went out to celebrate that night and more alcohol was involved and that led to me and him dancing together most of the night (I was the drunk one, he didn't drink). Now because I was drunk I was being abit over flirty ie. playing footsie under the table and dancing on him (yes I'm ashamed) but that was it, nothing else happened. That night when he left I just hugged him and apparently invited him to my place next week (with my cousin and her hubby) and he accepted. He left and I went back home the next day, I live in a different city. Anywho, when I woke up the next morning and remembered everything I felt really bad, embarrassed and freaking awkward whenever they mentioned his name. According to the hubby, his friend really likes me but I just don't feel the same. He's really sweet but I'm just not attracted to him and plus he lives in another city and from experience I just can't do long distance again. All three of them (cousin, hubby and the guy) are still planning on coming to my place next week to go out but I really don't want to see him because its going to be awkward. How can I explain to him that I don't like him THAT way without hurting his feelings? He is really a sweet guy and I wish I liked him but I just don't. I feel like such a pinkberry :/

[Nikky]

Hey ladies,

So today I was eating lunch with a friend and I see this girl eating there as well. I don't know her but I know of her if that makes sense (friend's old roommate). Anyways I had a crush on her (she has an awesome smile) a few years ago but never did anything. Anyways my question is would it be weird if a guy came up to you that you didn't know and said hello (while her friends are there)?

I would never suggest approaching a woman in front of her friends. Women are just catty and mouthy, especially in groups. (I'm; Hi pot, I'm kettle) So I say approach her when she's alone. One on one is more personal anyway and it ensures there is no outside influence.

Okay so I was at my cousins place this weekend for her wedding and her hubby introduced me to one of his friends. They've been trying to set me up with him for agesss but this was the first time I met him. He was quite shy at first which I found hilarious but because I was (slightly) drunk I kinda made him talk. Anyway, we went out to celebrate that night and more alcohol was involved and that led to me and him dancing together most of the night (I was the drunk one, he didn't drink). Now because I was drunk I was being abit over flirty ie. playing footsie under the table and dancing on him (yes I'm ashamed) but that was it, nothing else happened. That night when he left I just hugged him and apparently invited him to my place next week (with my cousin and her hubby) and he accepted. He left and I went back home the next day, I live in a different city. Anywho, when I woke up the next morning and remembered everything I felt really bad, embarrassed and freaking awkward whenever they mentioned his name. According to the hubby, his friend really likes me but I just don't feel the same. He's really sweet but I'm just not attracted to him and plus he lives in another city and from experience I just can't do long distance again. All three of them (cousin, hubby and the guy) are still planning on coming to my place next week to go out but I really don't want to see him because its going to be awkward. How can I explain to him that I don't like him THAT way without hurting his feelings? He is really a sweet guy and I wish I liked him but I just don't. I feel like such a pinkberry :/

Either cancel, or have them over, be a good hostess, try not to be alone with him. And at the end of the night when you will be inevitably alone with him, if he brings the topic up of you two dating, then tell him "I'm sorry, I just don't have feelings like that for you." Just be mature about it all. You are dealing with a human being here. You KNOW that he likes you, so if the situation were reversed, how would you like the guy to handle it? Run away? Or face you and gently let you down?