Ask The Fellas

[Guest asianami]

Hey, what/where do you guys like to go/do when hanging out with a good female friend? (NOT A DATE, DANGIT!)

Other than walking around the mall or chillin at her/your house. Thanks, trying to get ideas.

[Guest xsilentangel]

If you find out the girl you like found out that you like her, and she didn't like you (Reacted in no manner), what would you do? (Act normal?)

Sorry I worded that weird..

[Guest watcher]

If you find out the girl you like found out that you like her, and she didn't like you (Reacted in no manner), what would you do? (Act normal?)

Sorry I worded that weird..

depends... how long have i known this person? what's her current impression of me? how much do i like this girl? do i see a future with this person? do i still want to pursue?

if i liked her, and i found out that she knew, i'd stop hiding and pretend like nothing changed. i'd talk to her about it. she knows the full situations, but i dont. so i'll get to know as much about the situation, and act accordingly. usually, this would involve some kind of plan to create a path to make it work. she might not want to be my girlfriend, but she might be willing to hang out sometime. i work between the cracks and look for a way to slip in that locked room.

[everlastboxing]

If you find out the girl you like found out that you like her, and she didn't like you (Reacted in no manner), what would you do? (Act normal?)

Sorry I worded that weird..

i felt this once

and it does hurt

we try to brush it off because we don't want to look like we are bothered by it but it does impact us

[Guest joongielove]

1. being on good terms with any of his close friends is good.

2. this really depends on the guy/situation. if he feels the same way, he'll be happy. if he doesn't, he'll feel burdened. you don't really know, but in general, if he really does like you and shows it, chances are he will return the same feelings.

Awesome, thanks. ^^

Aish~I'm just insecure when it comes to these things I suppose. I'm always wondering 'does he or doesn't he?'even though he shows me everyday that he does. Just scared I guess.

1.) Yes, it's definitely a good thing. As you said, so long as it's not touchy or flirty, it makes things easier for you guys all to be around one another at the same time. If the friends DON'T like you it makes things considerably more difficult. Can even ruin a relationship if his/her friends really dislike you, so a good rapport with the friends is a positive thing.

2.) As watcher mentioned, it depends on the guy & the way he feels about her. If he loves her back, it's a great thing. If he doesn't, he'd probably be somewhat uncomfortable with it, and feel a little pressured to say he loves her back, even if he doesn't. Ordinarily saying "I love you" is a good thing though, and 8 months is a sizable amount of time to have spent with someone; I'd think he probably has a pretty good idea of how he feels about her by now.

Pretty much the same places I go with my male friends. My female friends, for the most part, are up for anything that my male friends are. So out to get something to eat, to the movies (as long as it's not a romantic movie), to a sporting event, to go play pool, to meet up with other friends somewhere, anything really.

1. Thanks, I figured being friends would help lol

2. Yeah, and like I posted before, I'm just insecure about everything. I made him my world and I don't wanna see it crumble.

Cheesy I know.

[Deafz]

Hey, what/where do you guys like to go/do when hanging out with a good female friend? (NOT A DATE, DANGIT!)

Other than walking around the mall or chillin at her/your house. Thanks, trying to get ideas.

Movies. Just hang around random places. Hang around the mall/restaurants.

If you find out the girl you like found out that you like her, and she didn't like you (Reacted in no manner), what would you do? (Act normal?)

Sorry I worded that weird..

I'd just act normal. Or I'd confess then move on.

[Guest marvinoppa]

hey gals and guys. whats going on?

[Guest krnswtrice]

why does the romance fade after you've been dating for years?

[Guest marvinoppa]

why does the romance fade after you've been dating for years?

because he sucks.

[Deafz]

why does the romance fade after you've been dating for years?

People run out of things to say, things to do. My best advice is to talk to your S/O and/or try to initiate something. Good luck.

[Guest watcher]

why does the romance fade after you've been dating for years?

romance is like building a fire. sparks fly at first and you get a fire going, but you gotta keep feeding it. your feelings dont control your actions. your actions control the feeling. therein lies your secret.

[Guest Deadalready]

romance is like building a fire. sparks fly at first and you get a fire going, but you gotta keep feeding it. your feelings dont control your actions. your actions control the feeling. therein lies your secret.

I am perfect agreement with Watcher, it's like going to the gym once and expecting to be fit forever.

What I like is elliciting love strategies, or finding out people's definitions of love and how to fill them. I suggest you sit down and ask your partner how do they know they are loved, it might be surprising to find out what they consider important. Normally a person will go out with someone and do everything for them touch them in that special way, speak to them in a special tone of voice or take them out and buy them things. After a while most people will fall back on what THEY want and that might not be what their PARTNER wants.

For example the family therapist Virginia Satire would regularly get couples with mismatched love strategies.

The woman would say "He doesn't love me!"

Virginia would ask her "how do you know?"

"He never takes me anywhere, he never buys me anything, he never shows me he loves me."

Then the husband would pipe up and say, "Well that's not fair, I tell her I love her all the time. She doesn't love me."

Virginia would ask him, "How do you know?"

"She never tells me she loves me."

Another thing is if you want to love like you did at the start of your relationship, then maybe consider doing the things that the two of you did when you first began dating. Mind you there's a scientific explanation for loss of love, except I won't bore anyone with the details.

[Guest ROCKiT]

lajsdlkajsdlkjasldj

nvm. my BOYFRIEND thinks this crap is about me. and doesn't believe that it's for someone else.

[Guest supernubb]

hey. do you think it's bad to think of another person constantly when you have a boyfriend? like, in a way constantly just from when you started talking to that person as a friend. or it's just a phase that happens from time to time. and it'll be over.

yeah, i think its bad if you think about them constantly like you say. could be considered emotional cheating by some... hopefully your bf doesnt find out, or he would probably be devestated, i know i would be if i found out a gf i loved a lot had those thoughts...

[Guest babossagaji]

One question: What do you think of guys who still k.i.t with their ex-gfs?

[Guest frollo]

Sorry if this seems like a stupid question, but how can I make it clear to this guy that I'm not interested in him?

I can't really tell him because he's the sort of person who'd act like it was all in my head, so is it possible to tell him with actions rather than words? I've tried avoiding him and acting coldly towards him, but he won't stop flirting with me. He's friends with my brother and he's at my house most days, so I don't want to cause a scene. Oh, and we went out with eachother for a couple of weeks last year but I just avoided him until he finally broke up with me.

Basically, is there anything I can do to make him realise I want him to leave me alone?

[Guest watcher]

I'm not positive what k.i.t.-ing means? It has to do with messing around with cars, I think? Well anyway, spending a lot of time with the ex-girlfriend doing anything is slightly odd, unless there's absolutely no attraction there anymore and they're just good friends. I don't think I'd personally want to be doing all sorts of activities with my ex, though. But I could understand if it was a girl I dated a few years ago and we were just friends, in which case she'd probably just be like any of my other female friends.

kit = keep in touch

[Guest x~Rin~x]

why does the romance fade after you've been dating for years?

because ppl have a tendency to get bored. dating the same person for years would become a habit. all passion is lost o_O

of course, this theory doesn't apply for everyone. there are lots of ppl in this world that date each other for years and eventually they get married.

[Guest watcher]

OH, LOL. All of these abbreviations nowadays confuse me. Thanks W.

oh really? we used to do that all the time on our yearbooks.

KIT = we're probably not going to talk ever again, but would like to think that we're still on good terms while we're off living our lives seperately

[Guest imkbx]

are the majority of guys attracted to older women?

i went out to eat with my bf and some of his guys friends yesterday, and while we were eating one of the guys said "milf" and every single one of the guys turned and stared. it was so embarrassing, she was with her husband and son (i'm guessing) too.