Kids Say The Darnest Things..

[Guest Crummy_proDUCKtions.]

I have a really funny one and it also happened today.

Ok, so we were at rite aid getting some of that dollar ice cream they have there.

The guy behind the counter was scooping ice cream and my 5year old cousin went up to the glass and screamed really loud, "Hey MR.". Then the guy bumped his head on the glass part. He was embarrassed so he acted like nothing happened, but then my cousin was like, " Mr., you bumped your head".

It saw so funny, but maybe you hafta be there to get it.

[Guest --TU *]

aww all of these are so cute.

i have one too.

when my sister was younger about 6-7 ish my family was watching a movie.

there was something about cocaine in it and my mom asked to no one in particular what cocaine

was in english (we are chinese - cantonese). then my sister blurted out "white powder", cocaine in canto is "baht fun" (>.< sorry bad romanizing)

which literally means white powder, and she was all proud about it when everyone just started laughing. lol

[Guest onetwothuy]

my little cousin, jinho, is mad adorable, but he's an idiot.

i went to the zoo with him & there was this man that looked like a gorilla. so jinho went up to him & he was like "hey mister, why aren't you in a cage?"

"excuse me?"

"want a banana?"

"?"

"nuna, can i have a banana to feed the monkey?"

i cracked up and walked away dying. HAHA.

HAHAA OMG;;

I WISH I COULD'VE SEEN THE MAN'S EXPRESSION.

[Guest xn3]

Funny story.

I work with kids at low income public schools, so of course it's pretty ghetto there. I supervise all black kids and usually they're pretty good, but they were all pretty horrible the other day. One student, whose only 5-years-old, in particular was throwing raisins at other students during their supper time, so I told him to pick up the raisins that he threw.

He gives me this look and starts picking them up.

I turn my back around for two seconds and I see him with a dust pan, squishing the raisins onto the floor and smearing them all over the place.

I yell, "TRISTAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

He looks up scared and says, "I was scrapping them raisins with the dust pan cause people was steppin' on them!"

"Don't lie to me! I saw you squishing the raisins! Here pick up the raisins with these napkins!" I give him napkins.

He gives me this look again and starts picking them up.

I walk out to supervise the third graders in the gym for 30 seconds and I come out to see the entire garbage bin knocked over with milk, cereal, and soggy sandwiches from their supper and Tristan was the only one right in front of it sweeping up the garbage with the damn dust pan again.

I asked him, "What happened now?"

He looks at me and says, "I don't know, I was picking up the raisins and throwing them in here and then the garbage died."

Seriously!

Raisins was what started this.

LMAO!!!

[Guest Dinoce]

cute....i can totally imagine a little kid saying this.

[Guest Sympathetic]

my little cousin, jinho, is mad adorable, but he's an idiot.

i went to the zoo with him & there was this man that looked like a gorilla. so jinho went up to him & he was like "hey mister, why aren't you in a cage?"

"excuse me?"

"want a banana?"

"?"

"nuna, can i have a banana to feed the monkey?"

i cracked up and walked away dying. HAHA.

LMFAO

[Guest selvaspeedy]

weeeeee my freaking niece

there was one day when my aunt visited us (I hate her soooo much... she's like an aunt from hell ) so I hid in my room pretending that I'm not there and my niece saw me...

so when she went out, my aunt asked her: Where's Selva my dear?!

and my niece said: she's hiding from you and doesn't wanna see you

[Guest darkensky]

LOL when i was volunteering during march break camp for kids from like 5-12 and we were out building snowmen, then this group of 3 girls came to me and pointed at this other girl and said: " she's trying to put a d*ck on the snowman..." i was just like..O_O

[Guest blissfulmoments.]

LOL arent kids the cutest, this reallt brightened my day

[Guest nana544]

Kids can be so blunt!!!

Sometimes they can so make you laugh

and at other times, they're pain in the butt=)!

[Poop-Shoop-A-Loop]

LOL when i was volunteering during march break camp for kids from like 5-12 and we were out building snowmen, then this group of 3 girls came to me and pointed at this other girl and said: " she's trying to put a d*ck on the snowman..." i was just like..O_O

Woah LOL.

Just last weekend, my 6 yr. old cousin who's quite conceited ( xD) likes to call everyone UGLY 'cause she thinks it's funny. So my mom was like "do you think you're pretty?" Her: "...." (she obviously wants to yes but refrains from it).. my mom (teasingly): Naww~ I think you not pretty. You ugly~

Her (bursts in anger): I'M A MODEL AT SCHOOL!!!

Mom: You're a model? ( at this point everyone's mouth was open in shock cause she referred to herself as being a model LOL)

Her: YES!! EVEN MY TEACHER SAID SO!!! SHE WROTE IT ON MY REPORT CARD! She said I was a model student!

I completely LOL'D cause she misinterpreted what a "model student" was

[Con.template]

lol, Oh the days where I can say anything and get away with it...hahaha

[minsidiot]

Kids are so adorably blunt. <3 Well, MOST of them anyway. Adorable, I mean. :3

My cousin and I (at the time both 16+) were talking about this mutual friend of ours, and my sister (at the time, 6) was all "What does he look like?~"

My cousin said, "He's HHOOOOOOT!!!!" (which he is, hohohohoho~)

Then my sister goes, " I don't want to know what he FEELS like, I wanna know what he LOOKS like! >_>"

ON. THE. FLOOR.

(At the time, anyway XD)

XDD Cutest thing ever.

[Guest AngelEatsN00BZ]

This little girl told me I looked like a boy in a dress.

Then she laughed.

[Guest violacrazy]

It happened to my coworker actually. She was at a pool in her bathing suit and all (might I add she's also round). A kid walked by her and asked if she has a floating device under her suit.

She could only reply "yes" just to save herself the embarrassment. =/

And the other time during a program, a kid walked up to her and said "I love your big tummy"

[Guest Octopus__]

>>; I only know evil kids, lol.

I was at my friends house and

there were like two more of my

friends around as well. My friend's

brother was home and he's like

eight, I think. Well, he needed to

do his homework and the other

two friends of mine volunteered

to get him to do it. I told them not

to and just ignore him, lol.. but it

didn't work. In the end he was out

of his seat, running to the kitchen,

and grabbing a knife out. Kalene,

one of the 'tutors,' was shouting to

us in the other room.

"Jelena, your brother's brandishing

a knife at me!"-Kalene.

"He's WHAT?!"-Jelena.

"He says he wants to pop Kalene's

BALLOONS!"-James[the other tutor]

"WTF?!"-Me.

We all ran into the other room and

see Kalene covering her chest. We

all were like "Wt..f? o.o" Then he goes..

"She has balloons on her shirt. I

wanted to pop them."-Brother.

"My god.. WHY THE KNIFE?!"-Jelena.

"This kid is nuts! TT^TT"-Kalene.

"..I'm just going to go into the

other room now."-Me.

"ME TOO!"-James.

"..I'll call my Mom."-Jelena.

xDD It all ended well. Err, at least

for us. Haha.

[lovesbride]

>>; I only know evil kids, lol.

I was at my friends house and

there were like two more of my

friends around as well. My friend's

brother was home and he's like

eight, I think. Well, he needed to

do his homework and the other

two friends of mine volunteered

to get him to do it. I told them not

to and just ignore him, lol.. but it

didn't work. In the end he was out

of his seat, running to the kitchen,

and grabbing a knife out. Kalene,

one of the 'tutors,' was shouting to

us in the other room.

"Jelena, your brother's brandishing

a knife at me!"-Kalene.

"He's WHAT?!"-Jelena.

"He says he wants to pop Kalene's

BALLOONS!"-James[the other tutor]

"WTF?!"-Me.

We all ran into the other room and

see Kalene covering her chest. We

all were like "Wt..f? o.o" Then he goes..

"She has balloons on her shirt. I

wanted to pop them."-Brother.

"My god.. WHY THE KNIFE?!"-Jelena.

"This kid is nuts! TT^TT"-Kalene.

"..I'm just going to go into the

other room now."-Me.

"ME TOO!"-James.

"..I'll call my Mom."-Jelena.

xDD It all ended well. Err, at least

for us. Haha.

LOL OMG! BALLOONS!!!!!!!!! AHAHAHA!

I just remember this little kid, 4 years old, went up to this guy who's like over 20 (well we all know each other but.. yeah)

She just went up to him and went like:

"Kevin, are your hands clean?"

And he's just like really funny and he's like playing along and looking at his hands because it was so random and goes:

"Well I am pretty sure they are. I mean I washed them and stuff."

The little kid nods and goes:

"Oh okay." Holds out her arm and says, "You can hold my hand."

[Guest anniiepoo]

I just remember this little kid, 4 years old, went up to this guy who's like over 20 (well we all know each other but.. yeah)

She just went up to him and went like:

"Kevin, are your hands clean?"

And he's just like really funny and he's like playing along and looking at his hands because it was so random and goes:

"Well I am pretty sure they are. I mean I washed them and stuff."

The little kid nods and goes:

"Oh okay." Holds out her arm and says, "You can hold my hand."

awwww my gosh thats so adorable ><

[Guest polaroo]

So me and a few other highschoolers were in the church van going to retreat with these 6th graders and we(the highschoolers) were talking about golddiggers and how they(the 6th graders) shouldnt become a golddigger. then this one girl says "isnt there no more gold in the ground?" we still laugh about it now