ex girlfriend left me because of money? my ethnicity?

[Ninshark]

Part 1: 

So here's a story regarding my best bro, a black guy, and his Asian ex-gf. They went out for a little over a year and had a really good relationship, while it lasted. Eventually arguments started popping up, and it led to multiple break-ups and back-together rebounds and ultimate breakup.

The various reasons have been...
-her parents don't approve, since he's black
-she said she needs a break to be more independent-she doesn't think my friend has a future (he was unemployed at the time, but has a decent job now)-she's going to Cambodia for about 4 months around December and will be back around April 2015.
My friend is not one to fight back and argue, some may say that the girl wanted him to chase her, but he doesn't do so. instead of arguing, he usually pacifically walks away.

We aren't sure what to make of this situation. Are those reasons B/S? I don't know too much more of the details, but my friend is convinced it's because he's poor- so here's another questions: How important is money? How important is it to have promise of a stable future? How important is it to be stable right now? How long would you give somebody a chance if he were poor now (but were working towards something)? Any insightful comments and replies will be nice! 

Part 2: Her birthday is coming up in a week and my friend is struggling whether to wish her happy birthday or not. They have had no contact for 2 months now. My friend still likes her, but believe it's probably stupid of him to do this, because it won't change anything. I think that he should do it anyway to keep his foot in the door and maybe when he has a stable future she'll come back. But he's second-guessing whether it's a good idea to even take her back. What would you do? would you wish your ex happy birthday? why or why not? 

THANKS!

[Guest writerstale]

My roommate has been this Black guy. I've been this Black guy. Dude my last date I was told that I'm not White enough. When I processed that I thought WOW this girl is a special kind of stupid. Your friend's ex gf knows those are poor excuses and she knows deep down those are poor excuses. She's dating for her parents and status. Eff that female dog by definition. Tell him do not wish her anything and keep it moving! I've been in this situation. Talking to is not going to make things magically better. In the words of Drake, "She wasn't with me in the gym." Meaning she wasn't loyal while he's making the effort to work his way up why be there when the greatness comes. If he was a millionaire she wouldn't need to be more "independent." That's a bs excuse to use as her "out." Tell him I said it's plenty of other women out there. Don't wish her nothing on her birthday because it's part of what she expects. She expects to have him under her finger with the cake and eat it too. This is the part where he can't be weak. He has to hold his ground, and go do his own thing. Take time to heal, and then get back out into the dating field. Tell him to remember there are good and bad people of every race; and not to let this one experience completely taint his view of Asian girls. She came into your friend's life for him to know what kind of woman not to date when he's successful.

[riti89]

Part 1:
Well, I think-unfortunately-money does play a factor in a more mature relationship. When we are young we don't think too hard about the future for ourselves or for our relationships. However, as we get older being financially stable is of huge importance. That being said, I personally don't expect someone else to carry the burden of my financial stability. I want to make my own money independently of my bf/fiance/husband. However, I think while I don't expect my S/O to be rich I would like him to have goals and the determination to achieve them. As long as they are striving to constantly better themselves, I'm okay with that. I want to be able to respect them-not their money.
As sad as it sounds, money puts a huge burden on relationships because instead of having time to enjoy themselves and go on dates, the couples are trying to stay afloat and pay bills. This can lead to tensions. Honestly, this can happen in any relationship not just romantic ones. It may not be anyone's fault, but it's easier to pass on the blame than to own up to it. Money is the only universal language that everyone understands. 
Part 2:
If he is doubting her sincerity in entering the relationship, why should he keep his foot in the door? He shouldn't. Even if she comes back (which means she was only with him for the money) then would he really be happy? Probably not. He might always wonder what will happen if he happens to lose his job. No need to wish her a happy birthday. She walked away- let her and tell your friend to keep his dignity. Tell your friend to focus on his own goals and ambitions and tell him to enjoy life without giving a second thought to her. She made a decision and let her deal with the consequences (good or bad). He must go on with his life. The people worth fighting for are the ones that are there through the good times and the bad. 

[Roasty]

Shes just not into him anymore.

Tell him to move on. Most likely there is already someone else in the picture for her.

[Guest johnpatric]

When money comes between to person there is no space for love, and the person who choose money that person can't get love ever in their life.. And I agree with above post, she is not into him anymore to its better to tell him move on.. because he has his own life so tell him to focus on that, and he will get someone better then this girl so tell him keep clam and focus on his life..

[Guest glamazon21]

Her reasons to me seem pretty bullish to me. The one about her parents not approving I can kind of understand, but the one about how she doesn't think he has a future bothers me. If she isn't willing to try and help him turn things around by being supportive or encouraging I don't think she's worth his thoughts anymore because she probably doesn't love him anymore. As riti89 mentioned, money can put a huge strain on a relationship and she probably isn't happy that he can't afford the "best" for her. 
He probably shouldn't bother wishing her a happy birthday, unless he wants to rub salt on his wounds. 

[AsianChemNerd]

Part 1: I don't think money is a huge factor in the beginning but as you get older and you're at an age where one would expect to have a stable job then I think it would be disappointing if they still don't have any kinda savings for the future. Personally, I don't mind if the guy is poor at the moment (I am poor too!) but I would definitely want him to be working towards something. I wouldn't be able to date someone who just bums around and doesn't think about the future.

Part 2: There's no point in wishing her a happy birthday. She probably won't care anyway.

[thesteel]

If she REALLY wanted to make things work out, she would have. She didn't seem to be interested enough to offset the points you mentioned

He should definitely NOT wish her a happy birthday, the reason he wants to is because of the small hope that things might work out between them again. He needs to continue going no contact to get over her, she gave up on him so quickly. Why chase after someone like that? She'll just do it again and even if she doesn't, the thought of her doing it will always be on the back of his mind. It's time to let it go