Ask The Ladies - Read First Post

[Guest hearthealer]

threetwofivesix said: Hmm this is kind of an awkward question, but here goes: I'm a virgin and I currently am in a relationship where he is so respectful and patient, etc etc but I really don't want to engage in foreplay.....at least, the more um extreme parts of it?  Is sex without foreplay not fun? And is it wrong of me to not want to.....? He hasn't pressured me into doing anything I don't want to do, but I don't want to disappoint him either.  What are your thoughts? 

[Guest hearthealer]

@Ninshark
PersonallyPlaces i'm ok being hit on: Bars, clubs, coffee places...common areas in school, workplace...anywhere where i have nothing particular to get done
Places that are questionable: Public transport like buses, trains etc, malls, grocery places, anywhere where i might be in a rush (or not)
Places i hate being hit on: In class, when i'm obvious rushing such as in between classes, while i'm at a coffee place getting readings or homework done...anywhere where it's obvious i have something more urgent, far more important to get done thn flirt.
Airplanes are fine for me, cause now i have my ipod and the inflight movies to tune out annoying advances...
For the girl on the bus, it might just be she was late, tired, frustrated with delays....or maybe she just got off to avoid getting hit on further by you, apologizing is just society's way of being polite...I've apologized to guys for running off when they were trying to get their game going...not that i wanted them to continue hitting on me, but rather i felt bad for dumping them when i knew what was clearly going on...no one knows why she did what she did but her, we can only speculate

[Guest Halia_1]

Hello Lovely Soompi Ladies.

Please help....

So I got into an argument with boyfriend today. During our conversation, he said his friends saw me at school, and they said I am  pretty, Ofc i feel flattered. and he also said that he replied to them '' make up is amazing'' . He knows them like for like a month and he says that, and of course they ask back, which they mean is like 3 girls, '' Does she wear lot of make up?" and he replies back '' little'' but i am sure he just told me that so i wouldn't get more mad.. I felt hurt.. he knows them like a month since uni started but.. I honestly don't wear make up that crazy, only have eyeliner and mascara. When i am without my make up, there is ofc a difference but I just feel hurt.. He does see me without make up a lot, If he was saying that to his close friends, i wouldn't even make a deal out of it. But ppl i dont even know and he says that. He could have been just like '"oh", or ''ok" or something, instead of making a stupid comment.He goes mad and says he won't tell me anything from now. and I just said whatever.

Would any of you feel the same way as me??

[Guest xphant0mwing]

Hi ladies of soompi!So i have a situation that i would like to ask you guys about..Last month i met this girl in class.. i thought she was cute but i never thought i would think anything of her. However, within this last month.. we've actually gotten closer and closer.. and i started to become interested in her. I didnt think she would be interested in me but.. it seems like she is since two things, we've met up 3 times so far outside of school.. 2 times cause she visited me, the first time she visited i didnt think much.. but the second time.. she was sick and she stayed for an hour.. cause we were talking, both times she hugged me after she left. a co-worker of mine said she would eye me when i was working, btw i work at a boba store.. my co-worker said she for sure is interested...so it seems like my co-worker is right... but heres the turning point, yesterday i studied with her.. and we ended up talking about the dating life. apparently she's dating someone |: but everything she said about the guy she's dating is all horrible things.. a(example "i would catch him flirting with other girls and what not, but he would always lie about it.. he doesnt go to school, and he doesnt work so im basically providing for him..." stuff like that...so am i just uhh being led on or is something going on? does she think that im not interested.. or what? im confused. and also i think im put on the friend zone list now.. sooo what do you guys think i am to her.. just a regular friend? so what do you soompi ladies think of it?  questions comments? feel free to post a reply or pm me [: thanks ladies.

[Guest xFloOwuffBB]

I'm not a guy but I'd like to see some other points of view on this question.
Would you take back a cheater?

[wbubbly]

^ nope a cheater will always be a cheater. He might change in the beginning just to get you back, but in the long run, he will most likely give in to temptation. Especially knowing that he cheated once without much consequence (if you were to take him back). 

[Guest xFloOwuffBB]

@wbubbly Honestly that's how I feel as well, however a lot of people have told me that thinking that way is very close-minded.. so I'm just trying to get other people's POV

[Guest meimoo*]

I have been talking to this guy for almost 2 months and we started to

call each other sometimes to wake each other up in the morning

and already giving each other nicknames.

are these consider processing too fast?

 

[Guest anoopalex]

Love and Immaterial Doubtsmindmattersindia.com
You are in a relationship, one you really want to take forward. Yet you worry, question yourself, and fuss about various possibilities of which none can be sure bout. Is she/he the one for me? What will I tell my parents? How can I be sure I will be happy with her/him in the future?.... (To continue reading go to - http://mindmattersindia.com/love-and-immaterial-doubts/)

[Guest hearthealer]

xFloOwuffBB said: I'm not a guy but I'd like to see some other points of view on this question.
Would you take back a cheater?

[Eclectic]

Do you often interpret passiveness as a lack of interest? (if not that, then what?)

[Guest sunye~]

@Eclectic Asian

Generally I would interpret passiveness as lack of interest. Being a passive person, I take notice when another passive person does small gestures, but it would still leave me trying to guess his intention. You don't have to be loud or anything overboard, but it's better to be more active if you want someone to know you're interested in them.

[Guest dolcedor.]

Eclectic Asian said: Do you often interpret passiveness as a lack of interest? (if not that, then what?)

[Guest mularice]

xFloOwuffBB said: I'm not a guy but I'd like to see some other points of view on this question.
Would you take back a cheater?

[Guest Marrehj]

Eclectic Asian said: Do you often interpret passiveness as a lack of interest? (if not that, then what?)

[Guest pasdechat]

Eclectic Asian said: Do you often interpret passiveness as a lack of interest? (if not that, then what?)

[Eclectic]

If a male stranger tried to make casual small-talk with you (example: waiting in line at the store, at a bus stop, etc.), what would you automatically assume (i.e. think to yourself) about his intentions?a) "omg, what a creep...need to get out of here fast!"b) "Is he trying to hit on me?"c) "Meh, he must be bored and is just trying to pass the time."d) "He's just being friendly, that's all."e) (think nothing of it, at least not at that moment but maybe afterwards...)f) ???
note: casual talk examples-(waiting in line at a store) asking a question about the thing(s) you're going to buy (i.e. if you would recommend it)-(at a bus stop) asking for information about a bus route or complaining that the bus is taking too long to arrive-(coffee shop) notices the book you're reading and says "that's an awesome book" because he read it too-(you both walk out of the first day of class) He asks you what you think about the class/professor so far, your major, etc.ETC ETC
EDIT: @Iron_MaidenGood point, there's too many variables to consider, such as the guy's age/appearance/his approach
Hmmm, how can I make this question "answerable"? Let's just assume it's an "average" guy (will vary from individual to individual) who is the same age as you. And let's assume you're both in close proximity from the very beginning (i.e. he's not walking towards you).

[Guest Iron_Maiden]

Eclectic Asian

said: If a male stranger tried to make casual small-talk with you (example: waiting in line at the store, at a bus stop, etc.), what would you automatically assume (i.e. think to yourself) about his intentions?a) "omg, what a creep...need to get out of here fast!"b) "Is he trying to hit on me?"c) "Meh, he must be bored and is just trying to pass the time."d) "He's just being friendly, that's all."e) (think nothing of it, at least not at that moment but maybe afterwards...)f) ???

note: casual talk examples-(waiting in line at a store) asking a question about what you're going to buy-(at a bus stop) asking for information about a bus route or complaining that the bus is taking too long to arrive-(coffee shop) notices the book you're reading and says "that's an awesome book" because he read it too-(you both walk out of the first day of class) He asks you what you think about the class/professor so far, your major, etc.

ETC ETC

[Guest cinjin]

There's this guy I always see around campus (he's in the class before mine, so as he gets out of that class, I'm going into it). We usually have eye contact every time we pass by each other, but I don't think I can interpret that as mutual interest. I wouldn't say we're complete strangers, though we never really talked either. We have some mutual friends, so I saw him at a party a few days ago. I thought it was finally my chance to introduce myself, but throughout the whole night, my friends kept pushing me to do things that were completely away from him and he also ended up leaving the party early.
So, that's basically the back story (it's not much, I know). Obviously, from all that, you can't tell if there's interest on his side, but I am confident that he at least know of my existence. Whether the impression he has of me is good or bad, I'm not sure lol. Anyway, I decided I should just approach him the next time I see him and be like "oh, you were the one at so-and-so's house, right?" and hopefully the conversation will go well from there (tbh, I don't know what else I can say besides that). Is that weird? It's not weird, right? lol I don't know what else to say. I'm pretty determined to actually do it, since I don't want to have regrets about this, but I really just need that spark of confidence to push me forward. Can you girls give me that? T_T

[Guest dolcedor.]

GO FOR IT. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

And report back after you do it. =)