Green Chilli
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Posts posted by Green Chilli
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6 minutes ago, ktcjdrama said:
Interesting that almost all of the discussion is about 30s couple... I do wonder why...
Anyway, I form my opinions based on what I've heard and seen in real life around me, then sharing my thoughts here for those who are interested. You're free to ignore my posts if they're not to your liking. I would never know anyway who actually read them, LOL...
I have a distant relative (my older generation), the husband slept with the sister of his wife. In their home. At that time, the unmarried sister was living with them. It was a really big house, so it's not like they were forced to have close interactions and thus develop feelings. Eventually when it became known, wife chose to divorce him and left the house to them. I heard she was super duper mad and upset (of course!), but she still chose to leave. She is fine on her own now, because she herself is a strong capable woman who can make money by herself without having to depend on the husband. When that happened, the kids were around teens. Now, husband still with the sister at that same house, and they have their own kids. Children from first wife have left also, for studies elsewhere, and because all have grown up. Can you just imagine how awkward it is if there were a family reunion.
Another case, also a relative, my generation but older in age. Wife actually barged into a hotel room and caught the husband red-handed with another woman. Their youngest kid was barely a toddler at that time. Wife chose to forgive and they remain married (with no other scandal heard) until now. That youngest kid is almost finished with college now. The incident is never mentioned again ever, and I guess that's how they are able to keep going with the marriage.
Back to our drama. If BHR wants to remain in the marriage, she needs to not keep digging this thing up and reminding everybody about the incident. Vent her anger now if she must, let it all out and then move on, whether staying in the marriage and try to salvage it, or just let go by divorcing her unfaithful husband. People around her has given her advice but she refuses to listen and insists on her opinions and her ways. Her FIL came with good intention and calmly advised and reminded her that "Even the nicest things get old when mentioned often. Let it slide and don't dig the matter back up whenever SH gets on your nerves.... She is not his wife. Forget about it as of today and try mending your relationship." Yet she kept shooting him down (the way she often shot PSH down), until FIL was so upset to think "Would it kill her not to talk back once in a while?" He also said "Take it as a learning experience and move on" I thought the FIL visit was very kind and loving gesture towards her. I feel that it's good and probably intentional that he did not announce his visit beforehand because the impact will be different when BHR is already psyching herself what to talk about to the FIL. It's the time for him to convey his thoughts on the problem, not hers.
~ Don't dig the matter up - That failure is not a weapon to be used against your husband whenever there is a quarrel. And I can guarantee, there will be many disagreements down the road of marriage.
~ Try mending your relationship - This is the key thing that BHR should concentrate on, but she does not want to. I wonder what is it exactly that she wants from PSH?... Well, actually I kind of have a good guess of what she wants, which she will not stop grilling PSH (even her PIL included) until she gets it, that is to meet SW and to probably slap her or pull her hair, or at the very least to scold her and humiliate her. Yes, that's the kind of character that she's been portrayed by how the writer wrote her, and that's the reason why PSH will never let BHR meet SW at all cost. I am guessing BHR will never let go of PSH until she gets to meet and vent her anger on SW. She is holding onto PSH and her marriage for the wrong reason.
So, if you were BHR's friend, what advice would you give her? Mine is pretty much the same as the FIL. Stay in the marriage if you want, but let the matter go, don't dig it up again, and mend the relationship. Or the other option, divorce your husband and live a better life of freedom. No one wins in the blaming game.
She can follow FIL advice only when she knows things are down between husband and mistress. Husband is postponing breakup , she asked himMultiple times to have a clean breakup but he keeps saying next day , next week . So how can wife let go.
and PIL cannot be trusted they are on sons side .
once she can trust that husband has truly let go then only she will be able to follow any good will suggestions not when husband has a sour face because he is unable to meet mistress
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5 hours ago, Ameera Ali said:
is asking for more , to find hot rice when you are in home at weekend because in that she also failed at it miserably
** She goes out enjoying herself, while leaving him with nothing to eat , even pets treated better than she treat him
@hsmz lost my sympathy toward her when she put her hand on him
really a grown man cannot make rice for himself that too in rice cooker .now a days 12 13 years old boys know how to cook.
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7 minutes ago, hsmz said:
this is when people will say, when you have someone that loves you, can comfort you, always give you arm pillow, can listen to you, care for you, but you took him/her for granted because you are so CONFIDENT that he/she will always stay by your side and swallow all your true self till end of the world... and now you said you need someone else to listen to you and comfort you...
people tend to appreciate something or someone when it/them no longer be in front of us or ignore us... that's when reality hits. We shall see what will happen to Prof Park when he starts to realize that NGB is nothing to be compared with Writer Lee, and Dr Shin when SPY prevent him to see his daughter.
I didn't say I'm so right, and you are so wrong. No. Don't get me wrong my dear. It just we have so different opinion about BHR's attitude and style towards her husband and his family. PSH also not a perfect husband as he always kept what inside and always avoid arguments. How I wish to see him at least stands firm to eat at home together while she forcing to eat out also get mad at her when she ask him to lie to his parents.
But, what to do.... the writer-nim didn't grant my wish.
Leaving wife and having an affair for solvable issues is a person worth forgetting is my take .
I meant now that she has real problem where husband broke the trust , disrespected the marriage vows , impregnated another women , these are much bigger issues than any of smaller stuff PSH faced in his marriage .she definitely needs a friend who she can depend on but I don’t see any one other than 50s wife who is in similar situation . I think the seoBan and brother are just going to remain in imaginations going by what we saw so far and sure hope no affair is in offing .
if BHR decides to stay in marriage for other benefits so be it, it serves him well. He broke the trust of marriage and deserves punishment what ever she gives him. I sure hope she does not go affair route but PSH deserves every punishment she throws at him .
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2 hours ago, hsmz said:
but you didn't mentioned, she didn't welcome her with sincere heart. she have the nerves to call that woman's son who that woman's husband bought the house for them as their wedding present and informed him with unsatisfied tone that his mother came. As a woman, she must be considerate and tolerates as her mother in law is not a type who likes to barge her own son's crib and stay the nights unless she have a a problem with her husband. (as you know, PSH's mom is a very devoted wife towards her husband). The scene was a 10 months flashback, meaning she still not "liking" her MIL or have the sincerity to welcome her with open hands to their house. She's not her step MIL like Dongmi, that's her own MIL, her husband's mother.
If she can't hold it inside, she can always text or call her friend and complain about it but she have the nerves to call her husband yaaaa? I asked my male friend, if your mother came, and your wife call you and seems complain about his mother's presence, he said, I will get mad & yell at her on the phone.
bas
Yes, the cold scene was after he met and be friended with SW. But, what if the scene was shown before he had an "affair"? Also, if the cold scene showed after she found out about his dark affair, yes, I can understand just like I understand, he have to slept on the sofa after she knew about the dark affair.
Just look at the drunk scene, she got mad at him got home drunk, but she can be drunk & humiliated the husband by went out from the car & and asked Seo Ban directly to his face, why he didn't introduced her to his friends, said something about her beauty face bla bla blaaaa.... My oh my, yes I understand, everybody have their own "honesty" during drunk, same like PSH called her "kyaaaaaaa". PSH said, he always being kicked to sleep on the sofa, but when she drunk, PSH made honey water for her and didn't ask her to sleep on the sofa. And also BHR reminded PSH what he did while she was drunk for the first time. PSH bought her medicine, helped her throw up & carried her to the car. But when PSH wants to eat fried egg to cure his hangover, but what he get? A yell from his own wife...
And the lump scene, PSH rushed home and straight away check her wife's condition. Turned out it just an ulcer. It showing that PSH truly loves and care for her. PSH worried about her sickness, but she kicked her husband slept on the sofa, without giving him any warm water or medication eyyyyy. She said herself, Korea have 24-hour cafe/diners and a lot of convenience store too. Why can't she go out for a while and buy some porridge and medication for her husband? At least I have a thought that she loves and care much for her husband. Ohhhhhh.... maybe she can't be seen by others while buying those things because she is a top celebrity like Song Hye Kyo right. Ok, understand.
And she didn't prepare any emergency medication at home? Ohhh, I forget, she's not a housewife, she didn't have to prepare all that as for her the husband the ones need to prepare it all. She didn't have to do anything at home, apart to take care of her beauty face.
What I can't understand, why he can tolerates with her, shows his love and care for his wife but she can't?
Sorry, managing what? She's the one who forget, but why PSH needs to pick her "p00p" and lie to his parents? Why didn't she call and apologize to her PIL herself for not able to be there for her FIL's birthday and lie that she have some other works to manage at radio station or meeting with new home shopping channel? I know why, she wants to cover her own "@zz" and didn't wanna show her bad side to her MIL. And either she calls or PSH calls, her PIL still feel offended right because they both didn't come and celebrate the father's birthday. I guess the mother felt more offended as she knew her son is lying to her to cover for his wife's mistake. Just like the foods as well. She said herself, she lied to her MIL and told her that her husband always eat breakfast, which he didn't. Lying is like a cancer, once you start to lie, you will lie again and again, because you think, you'll never get caught.
Sorry for the long reply. Sometimes, talk is just a talk. Yes, she showed her care by asking PSH to sign up for the gym to be fit, being strict to him regarding his food consumption & worried about he will be getting a lot of works after started working at his friend's firm, but in the end, but it's all just a sweet talk. We must walk the talk too right?
I'm a woman, she is a woman too and I have seen people who exactly like her and that's why I write this replies.
The ideas you are propagating are to have wife bend over backwards to service husband . There is a prime example PSH mom all her life served husband , where did it take him no where.so I am ok with what is shown as care from BHR side. The cold he should have been careful , she could not go in the middle of the night to fetch food from him, most caring men in the world not expect to run out in the middle of the night to fetch food , will make do with what is in the home.
There is a clear contrast shown there , BHR was thiughtless and may be she is thoughtless to everyone . but there is duality in PSH behavior , recklessly got cold to please Mistress and was not thoughtful enough for wife . That is my take .
in laws relation , in majority households in the world , it is very formal relationship. people do only so much to have a decent relationship specially in Asian countries where DIL comes to sons , so it is sons responsibility to tend to parents. How do you know she was not sincere , she is inconvienced yes but she did sit with MIL and fed her apples while listening to her rants about FIL. That is decent enough behavior when MIL really needed someone to hear her rants . her son was not there , it was BHR.
yea PSH ran to her For cancer care because she is the person who demands attention . She would have been persistent if he said I will come later. Yes PSH needed to learn that to be persist this on things he wants from her just like he is now , he is going around convincing everyone to ensure him being in contact with Sangwon. He needed to that not simply comply and then run off to have affair.
Todays world is an equal world where both genders go out and work and extremely busy and tired , you cannot teach your daughters to bear an additional burden of serving the husband . Yes she needs to caring side but rest everything what BHR does is not some sky falling down scenarios .
Most people bag their family members to exercise and eat health , if you see that controlling then no one can that person .
why is it sweet talk those are all things which actual impact on life and your quality of life . So nothing is dismissive .the contrast is shown in the series itself where 40s stepmom , and epitome of housewife fed her husband so much unhealthy food and causes heart attack but for outsiders it will look like she took great care LOL
i actually glad BHR is like that , otherwise she still be where she is just like her MIl, 30, 50s wife.
she just needs to give hard time to moron husband and clingy mistress and then decide what is best for her , stay in the marriage or go out have fun.i hope you support her affair too if it really happens , because she is in now in need for someone to listen to her wows and comfort her .
30 minutes ago, hsmz said:I don't think she's very western upbringing. there was line from PSH's father .."You should only emigrate if you're young." - refer to BHR's parents (episode 1, season 2) after the in-law informed they will fly back to Canada on Wednesday.
Meaning, BHR's family was living in Korea all this while before the parents emigrate to Canada (maybe just in few years before.)
we don’t know that when they actually emigrated. If she does not have western upbringing , we can call her modern working women who has independent thought and practices western lifestyle LOL-
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14 hours ago, hsmz said:
yeah, a lot of her fans really feel relieved when she said she getting a divorce from her ex husband who always bully her mentally and physically. I'm not sure what kind of husband he was during their marriage, but after their marriage crisis broke and media covered it, then we know the husband was so so bad temper.
And her fans praised her by marrying her boyfriend, who she had an affair during her almost-broken marriage. The son with his older sister stayed with their mother & we never see them having a good time with their father. Not a single photo we can see in the magazine or in the papers (during that time) showing that the kids having a blast time with the father (when they were younger). Remember, the father also a celebrity right and all media shown about the father was about his new family without mentioning about the kids with his ex wife. Ohhh, I remembered now, the female celebrity had a full custody and didn't let her kids to meet their father and he once mentioned this in that show too. (just like SPY's mom right?)
Now the father-kids relationship seems getting better as the kids now grown up already. The daughter became a rookie singer by now. The son got engaged end of last year and media covered the story and I saw the father too (not sure the son has married or not due to Covid19 compliance)
They are all now happily living with their new family. Even it started with a cheating, but she found her true love now. The female celebrity is so famous in my country, if I say her name, her ex husband name & her current husband name, everyone in my country know them. (except generation Z who born after year 2000) hahaha...
Bad lesson to teach kids , endure abuse and then cheat and then get divorce when coughs.
she should have gone to police for
abuse and get rid of the husband .
yes it is a tough choice but it is the right choice .
9 hours ago, Ameera Ali said:they said when relationship breakdown is
What he said ..
what she said ..
And the true , oops mean the writer true
She said : I just realise strong bond was important than passion
But THE TRUE is
** building their strong bonding, by embarrassing him
**building a strong bond by switching off what he like
** building a strong bond by kicking him out from bed while he need her
** building a strong bonding by throwing away his mom food
** building a strong bonding by refusing to do any activity with him
** building a strong bonding by let him eat alone while sick
** building a strong bonding by not wanting to visit his family with him
**** building a strong bonding by forgetting his parent birthday
** building a strong bonding by being rude to his parent
**building a strong bonding by refusing to do minimum wife duty’s
** ** building a strong bonding by being unreasonable
they were also scenes that show she cares , she spoke to him and worried about his work load when he shifted companies.
there was a scene when she told him to work with lights on .
she cares about his health /physique and him eating healthy food . Which is what majority of family members do for their loved ones , it definetly falls into nagging but not controlling nor uncaring attitude
she treated her mother in law properly when she came home suddenly after she fought with FIL, she also asked FIL if he wants to eat when he cane later.
yes she is very western in her upbringing so expecting a phone call before is not a big sin.
husband can make himself breakfast.
Husband should have been thoughtful when he came down with cold it was because he was too thoughtful for the mistress , so stayed out of car in cold. Her job is voice job , she cannot afford cold , he should have shown 1/10 of consideration which he showed mistress and he himself should have slept outside.Food , mother gave the food for the son , it is sons responsibility to eat the food not go out and have dinners with mistress because of which the food went bad.
toe nail problem , not sure if it is an insult ,the salon lady will take care of toe nail problem , he is more shy than embarrassed there.
she prioritizes her stuff than in law stuff and maintaining relationships with having husband cover for her, that is called managing relationships , if she says she won’t come if would have offended them . A clean and easy way to maintain tricky situations .
the way she communicates is blunt but does not mean harm .
the husband is too wimpy , does not stand up to what he believes and gives in every time , then he should not complain later on.
6 hours ago, lebeaucouple said:To summarise in short what we learnt from this drama :
- A mistake is something that happens accidentally. Cheating and Lying are not accidents, not a mistake, they are choices.
- Infidelity does not come from lack of love, it comes from lack of respect.
- If you leave someone for another person, don't be surprised if that person leaves you for someone else one day (karma??)
- Never settle for being someone's others when you know you have the full potential to be someone's only.
Pls feel free to add in the list....
Let's toast for all the wives have a happy ending for them. Cheers!
well said .cheating is a choice which morally lacking people make . It is not a disease where you do not have control.
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1 hour ago, airgelaal said:
I guess I missed something. Is Ga Bin sick?
I don’t think so they are all hale and healthy
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3 hours ago, partyon said:
Ep 4 and I have a request to the writer:
PLEASE, CAN WE GET RID OF THE GHOST?
Okay, so on to other parts of the drama.
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Wow, the 50s couples situation is so realistic it sends shivers down my spine. I applaud the writer for making this part so truthful. It's gonna hurt the wife, but she needs to get through it, and come out stronger. Not sure why we saw her take some sleeping(?) pills, but I hope they aren't teasing us that she's gonna have an overdose later.
- The 50s husband hasn't clearly let it sink in yet what kind of mess he's gotten himself into. His new gf is clearly only using him and is definitely not over her ex yet. I still think he will come to realize his mistake sooner or later.
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LOL at 30s dad having a total change of heart and doing a 180 as soon as he met Song Won. I guess it was expected though because she has more of the qualities that he favors.
- I find it so distasteful that 30s wife is trying to get pregnant right now. This is not the time for that.
- The ep 5 preview was interesting. So 30s wife is all for having an affair of her own and she think she will be able to stop it after one time? Okay, fairly sure she's gonna fall in love with the guy - anyone wanna bet?
Also, can we get some makjang?
Please let 40s wife's father be alive (the ep 5 preview is teasing us that it could be the case) and please please please make the father be the oriental doctor.Having 40s wife and 40s mistress be half-sisters would be a dream come true!
Give us makjang!
I want to see BHR get together with the hot guy but I believe these scenes are just to show temptation from wives side but I believe nothing will come out of it unfortunately ...it also shows that BHR was a faithful one and was commited, now she wants to do tit for tat to get revenge but it may not materialize .
i will be happy if it did
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Wow, the 50s couples situation is so realistic it sends shivers down my spine. I applaud the writer for making this part so truthful. It's gonna hurt the wife, but she needs to get through it, and come out stronger. Not sure why we saw her take some sleeping(?) pills, but I hope they aren't teasing us that she's gonna have an overdose later.
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5 hours ago, agenth said:
I don't have much sympathies with BHR. She doesn't seem to be hurt about being cheated on. That's good for her, then, that her heart didn't bruise nor break. But at the same time her lack of painful emotions makes my sympathies for her go dry. All I see is someone whose "perfect" life was shattered - but not in the way that breaks down people, but just the high standard she had. BHR is a young QUEEN, like she told her friends she trained her husband who adores her and does anything for her, she's got beauty, she's got riches and fame, she's got it made. She doesn't want her life to change.
Why would she then listen to her husband's weak cries? When she finds out the husband who was supposed to cherish her, actually cheated on her, she was shocked yes, but as episodes go on I think it's simply because her pride got hurt, because like everyone around her says she's so pretty, WHY would anyone cheat on her?
Now that she recuperated her thoughts are mostly about how her life shouldn't change, but just in case, we see that she's desirable as men clamor for her attention - GIRL GOT OPTIONS. We know. But she still hangs unto her old life, because she wants perfection - only, it's not real anymore, that's why she tries so hard by manipulating everyone around her.
As for 30s parents. I saw the 30s father being dismissive of his wife all s1 and it culminated into their fight, which is understandable, I'm only amazed that the wife had so much patience. She probably thought oh my husband is just someone who can't show that he cares (which is also not surprising for that generation and males). But when she first saw the kid-like way he lights up when he remeets Dongmi? Well, she already had a bad feeling which now was revealed with Dongmi's letter and present. She totally has been treated like a maid and did everything without much complaints. I hope 30s father SUFFERS without her care. He deserves to wilt, but I got not much hope that he sees the light of his ways. I can only hope that he will experience what it means to be a better husband to the wife who has only known him and served him.
As for 30s father's ageist remarks? I'm not shocked, because he's been shown to be traditional and honestly a lot of that generation thinks and talks in such an ageist and sexist way. He also thinks all he says is the right thing, when he talks a lot of gibberish.
In BHR case , her anger, pain and her hurt were already shown in season 1 when she got physically sick throwing up blood .see is now gathering her wits and weighing her options . She will now think about herself as she came to conclusion all men are same and scum hugs and only seem good till the time they get caught. Don’t dismiss her pain just because she is not your typical miss two goddyshoes
i actually wanted her to follow in laws to mistress place but she did not , I was disappointed . Her trust has broken and is still breaking as she is finding slowly the in-laws never cared about her anyways , which is typical in-laws always are about the son and only son.
today we got to see the hurt of 50s wife when she realized whom her husband was dating , so far she was blaming herself now she can see what a scum bug the husband is so her anger and pain out in today’s episode , she also got physically hurt .
how is PSH and mistress an accident , they went on dates for months , it was slow and deliberate buildup till they slept together2 hours ago, airgelaal said:So both PSH and SW said to everybody that they ended everything between them and everybody must trust them, so they never will meet each other. And what we saw today? They met and very happy together. I'm speechless.
They both are putting up a show and buying time simply .. not to be trusted . Both seem very glib talkers-
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I don’t think it will happen but I want BHR to get her miracle baby with seo bans brother and bring two children out of wedlock to the marriage , then we can see the reality off hey we cannot let baby suffer theory floating int he drama as well as viewers .
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Looking at how all three trailer moments for wives turned out be just Their imaginations , I don’t see writer has any intention to explore wives stories , they are reduced side characters so far and I am really not interested to watch some scum bug husband and mistress stories ..
after seeing PSH fathers who wants a doormat and a mother who spent entire life serving the father and still
ended up getting no real affection , you can see the where PSH behavior and views come from ... his parents made raised and provided him all wrong stereotypes
and PSH and mistress cringe fest continues in the name of break up ...
I am waiting to see daughters confrontation and hope it does notturn out to be imagination as well .
All the wives are physically hurt due to the after effects of the cheaters , when will the karma hit the cheaters .
in this drama , literally lives are being destroyed by cheating but we do not see any good coming for wives , I hope there is no next season the story wraps up ... not work while wasting so many hours on this
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Writiernin is not writing to evoke any thoughts , she is courting controversy and she knows that this will get eye balls and I guess she is well
Known for that .
unfortunately we got sucked into it and most of us want to see wives story but looks the mistress glorification will
continue and the series will
drag forever without any resolution
for wives.
On a side note , why is it ok
for 30 mistress to have a baby without him Getting a divorce. And why it is not ok for 50s mistress to have a baby... he is officially divorced LOL again it is hypocrisy to support one and not support others .
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If anything the writer is shown if it does not depend on wife why husband cheats , it they get opportunity and they lack moral fiber they will cheat . 50s , 40 wife fall into good wife’s but see what thier husbands did , so cheaters will cheat even if you treat your husband like king . Even 30s husbands mother is an example , she devoted entire life for husband but for husband a dog and dogs name sake are important.
after watching this , it is hilarious to see people and characters putting blame on BHR .
why people are complaining that BHR should let go easily , she needs time to process and think of herself first than think of the trash and thier baby
I want to see a full kimchi slap from
BHR to mistress and then sue the husband for adultry
also suddenly I see comments on FIL talking trash talking mistress for her age but this show is so misogynist and expects wife to be doormats and watchers also are doing same to BHR who does not fit into thier misogynist and sexist views
40s wife grooming her daughter to be a perfect wife material is worst of worst .
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14 minutes ago, Sleepy Owl said:
Well, we can agree to disagree here, but they had major problems. SH was already frustrated of being controlled by her. Well of course, from her POV, she had reasons for it. She never liked him come home drunk since she hated the smell, controlled what he ate since he was gaining weight, forced him to join the gym for the same and many more. That is being controlled and he was already feeling frustrated by it all.
The cheating didn't start with him having casual talks with SW in my honest opinion. If that is where cheating starts, then I believe most of the people out there would be cheaters for speaking to person of opposite gender other than their spouse. Also, no one really just complain about their married their to others so easily. So when SH told he is considering divorce, he meant it, and at that time nothing really had started between him and SW.
I am not too sure, but being controlled is a major problem in a relationship. I am quite sure what attentive wife means, but I never saw her as one. Then again, it is just my opinion, and we can just agree to disagree.
most people who chat with opposite gender will not become cheaters because in most cases . people inform spouses if they are becoming friends and meeting regularly ,No they will not plan dinner dates behind wife’s back or go for long drives or teach cycle etc or confide thier marital problems so easily . You can understand peoplE confide in long time friends not new friends .how ever much people give innocent color to 3Os husband , they cheated .
yes they started to have problems but husband never talked to his wife , he simply went to mistress and complained .
and it’s is hilarious how nice mistress behaves and asks him break up and next moment offers to sleep , who does that in normal friends . She even upsized her breakfast and offered to some random new guy just like that , can anyone sane think of doing that for your gym buddy and let me also tell , he was reluctant to go to gym because wife pointed that he needs to be in shape , she told her it is better for professionals and well being . He was upset but what he did next , he went there to meet up up mistress regularly and also started health food gas once he saw mistress eating healthy. When wife said don’t eat much rice that means it is controlling , is it not hypocritical .
Even now she spouted all innocent lecture and then she goes and hugs him and agrees for yet another date . Both of them do not have any intention to beak up , they are just buying time .
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I am amazed who say they don’t support cheating but fully support 30s husband actions and want him to end up with mistress , that is condoning cheating .
baby is a convenient tool for justification.
Today episode again the boring psh and mistress saying all emotional nice words but actions are just opposite , end up hugging and agreeing for one more date ... yes we believe you that you will end the affair LOL ... same like the night , all goody talks and then she asked him to sleep and he slept with her .
i am annoyed at the PSH mother , she is upset because husband sends the medicine to other lady and gives a big lecture but she is not annoyed at SON who made an unforgivable sin .how she easily accepts sons behavior and what he did to DIL when she is in against for small fraction of husbands betrayal .
any way BHR thinking about her alternatives good , she sure wants a rich husband .
and both BHR and Seo bans brother play hard to get , need to see where it goes , I think it is only for teasing the audience with imaginations and make it seem same as husbands cheating I guess . Nothing will Come out of Sri van or his brother except they being served as eye candys.
I am also happy that BHR took 59s wife out for a drink , she needs someone she can talk to and lean on. Both actually . It was pleasant to see both of them out drinking , more scenes like the three wives supporting each other will be great.
I hate 40s wife grooming her daughter to be a future mini her , here goal is male daughter a good wife mother .
and cater to mans need .. I am sick of this attitude of hers even though she is otherwise very good.
is it a cultural thing that in Korea they will readily accept the child born out of affairs , it is unheard of in my country , even guys parents go no where near the mistress even though the child can get inheritance I believe .That is the reason I don’t find sympathy with the baby card. It is parents fault to bring a child into this mess.
I think the cheaters always hope the other Spouse lets go easily and they will ride into fairytale land with their
mistresses.
what should wives do , should they accept the suffering and Heartbreak
silently .
everyone knows there is actually no revenge that can be taken , the damage is already done and spouse who gets cheated on is the real loser int the situation.
but for the spouses it takes time
To let go of anger an bitterness , that is what BHR is doing trying to take out her anger and seeing what punishment she can dish out . She also knows that live and trust has left .
50s wife ended in a quick divorce but you still see her unresolved anger and feelings of victimization, they are slowly coming out now if you notice the behavior of hers with husband in last episodes . The children despise him , that is how it should be .
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8 hours ago, Gudetamama said:
I like "I have a Lover" too! But I have to skip some parts or watched in fast forward on the 1st 10 episodes, my heart couldn't take it, feel so sad for the wife.
This is my fav series too. The first 10 episodes were brutal for both husband and wife , I hated the husband but even then you could see that he was struggling along with her .
and how did he went about getting back to wife and remorse he showed , I never thought I would ever see that kind of make up.
the directors did a good job there , laid it out bare and cleaned it up well .
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12 minutes ago, hsmz said:
Isn't she? In the first flashback episode 9, when PSH asked her to call him with respect, and he will too, BHR didn't want to. All PSH wants is to be like an average couple, who spend time together, having lovey-dovey moments. And when BHR talked back & rejecting him to go exercise together, nahhhhh.... - starting this point I know what type of person BHR is and it added up after she went out without telling her husband and after that after that..
Well, don't get me wrong. You have your own opinion regarding PSH, I have mine too. I know you are fully support BHR 100% as for you, you won't accept cheating at any cost or reasons. Me, even I'm a woman, should support BHR 100% just like you, but I can't. IRL, I have seen a lot of cheatings around me, close friends and family. So, I quite understand PSH and his heart and I can understand BHR, inner and outside too.
People should stay the same, but it's undeniable, people do changed. Fall out of love, it's something that we can't predict. For you, PSH maybe trashy husband and SOB, it's alright if you thinks so. Like what PSH said, he never thought that his feelings would change like that and I totally understand that part.
she is defiantly prideful why should she not be .
I don’t remember ah won’t showing respect to him deliberately . Not sure where.
spending time is good but her ideas of spending time and his ideas of spending time are different .
he needed to fight it out with her couple of times . The only big fight they had is around when his moms food got wasted and he was trying to put blame on her. She rightly pointed out if he wants to eat eh ought to do the work , what was he doing that time , he was spending time and eating dinner with mistress .
i think their marrige needed few big fights where they air thier grievances , the husband does not want to confront so meekly accepts what she says . How will she know if he hated it unless you talk to fight.
anyway .. yes I guess I don’t understand why anyone should blame wife for cheating , this series itself shows that no matter how good bad wife is husbands will cheat .
i guess it is just the handsome guy playing cheater here which makes people think from his sow.
if you then look at it professor has his reasons to cheat then because he is overwhelmed and in debt to his wife and does not feel good about it .
first get divorce and then go after who ever the guy wants .
anyway .. I will stop here I have said all I have for BHR and PSH ,
wills we next week what the series brings for them .
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10 hours ago, ktcjdrama said:
Being pregnant in your 40s is very high risk. His mother was shocked too to find out this is the first pregnancy.
What’s done is done. It wasn’t exactly his choice to have a baby, so he has to make the best decisions now for everyone’s sake. He cannot undo whatever that happened and wallowing over it will lead to nowhere. Just like BHR keeps hammering his mistake over him while he was getting dressed, they will never move on to a happier healthier relationship. What I am seeing is that she intends to use that card to control him and make him give in to her demands. That will not make a good marriage. I also cannot remember she reflecting on herself why their marriage has become like so. Sure she cried, sure she is stressed out until ulcer, but we don’t know the reason for those. Was she crying over the loss of love from her husband, or that she is pitying herself? Was she stressed out because her marriage is falling apart, or that she will have to face the shame as a divorcee? We don’t know. So she could be a selfish person too, who only thinks of herself and her well-being. We don’t know until it is further revealed to us in the story.
People fall in love and out of love. That’s the reality. Some people choose to remain in unhappy marriage for various reasons, personal or pressures from society. Some choose to go on separate ways, amicably or hostilely.
I don’t thinkthere was any talk about high risk in the series , not all pregnancies in 40 is high risk .
she went to jeju for goodness sake, if it was high risk , she would not have travelled.
both PSH and mistress are using this push their own agenda.
i have no sympathy for pregnancy which causes immense pain to some one else.
the wife essentially caught the man red handed for cheating and got bombed with pregnancy news and the man is remorseless and was rude because he thought BHR would immidiately ask for divorce ,he was being sly relying on her to ask for divorce because now there is no way he can file divorce, fault is his , it did not work and she fell ill for stress ,that’s what doctors said and he because feels guilty and lacks backbone to resist the pressure from wife and pressure agreed to end the affair but he cannot and is showing on his face how unhappy he is to wife everyday and you expect wife to be nice and understanding and reflect on herself why cheating happened .
cheating happened because he could not control himself and he is of weak moral character .
wife is still processing and reeling under the after effects of the storm that hit her. She does not have obligation to think for his side only herself first. Whether she cried for herself or her for failing marriage or her trust being broken or her live failing so miserably , it is all included it is one reason that she is crying.
she should put herself first and go according to what is good for her , she does not need to think about anybody else
5 hours ago, airgelaal said:Common, he didn't send divorce papers not because he pitied his wife that much. He knows, that without her contest they will go to court and he will be in a great disadvantage. It can even ruin his career as a lawyer.
He is out of this marriage and has no plans to return. He left for his wife only her status. he is so cold to his wife and unhappy, that, I'm sure, he thinks that sooner or later she will decide to divorce him herself.
Agree with this , he cannot get a divorce unless she consents . He cannot file for divorce because he does not have any grounds. She can defiantly sue him , I hope she does.
he is just buying time to go with the flow and ensure mistress and baby stays in his life till he figures out next step with BHR, he will be over the moon if BHR agrees , he said as much in ep 2.
BHR should keep them hanging and
make them suffer . It is too easy to give them divorce just like that .
8 hours ago, hsmz said:It's just my opinion and part of my imagination from my own perspective as we already knew how makjang the writer-nim is. She can even kill the lead characters in the middle of drama if she likes (she has done that!)
So FOR ME, if she wanted to show BHR having a dark secret affair behind PSH, she can writes it. It just my opinion, and i don't owe anyone either i should prove it or not.to support PSH role or not is everybody's right. just like people who eat Big Mac without the Big Mac sauce. For you maybe it's not perfect but for someone's else, it's their way of eating and they love it. Yes, cheating is cheating, who says cheating is allowed? But for me, we have to see real root cause why cheating happened. In PSH's case, I quite understand how he felt. It's wrong for him to cheats on his faithful wife (which she didn't entertain any male fans or cheated too) but limit is a limit. He said numerous times, he always feel hurt and disappointed by his wife. Not once but numerous of times. I guess, before PSH met SW, PSH was the one who waited for his wife to divorce him as he didn't want to give a bad reputation to BHR. But then his feelings changed after he met SW. It's wrong for him to start & SW too but people like you and me are vulnerable. We tend to do something beyond our boundaries. That's why war is still happening now, in 21st century.
Before he knew SW was pregnant, he planned to file for the divorce too. He said to her when SW got back from Jeju in the flashback episode 1, season 2. The coughed blood scene was after BHR knew about the pregnancy right? Ask everyone in the world, are you even have the guts to send the divorce papers while your wife or husband warded into hospital? Yes, you will if you a one EVIL BEAST. But PSH felt so sorry for his wife, and said himself he will ended his dark affair to calm down the hot situation they've been thru at that time. But then he realized he can't. Why? Because he fully aware about his responsibility and then he realized his feelings towards SW too. He said he will do whatever BHR ask him to do but let the mother & baby stay in peace at least after the child birth. He then asked for his mother to help him because he aware that he have the obligation towards the baby.
Some of us, feel this is all nonsense by PSH, just like you think but for me I love to think differently. It's just me & I don't force anyone to agree with me. We always can be agree to disagree, peace!
Couldn't agree more with you. I didn't see BHR reflecting herself at all. At least SW went to church and ask for Lord's forgiveness and PSH admitted his mistakes in front of everybody. BHR never asked to PSH, "Am I that bad till you cheats?" All she asked was "is she's (refer to PSH's dark lover) good, entertain you well?" And the part keep hammering him about how he dress, forget to wear a socks, made me rolled my eyes. And you asked the question early in the morning, where we should go out and make money with ease mind and stable emotion, but you asked him and raised your voice to your husband. So "suweyyyy" to ask about upsetting things early in the morning. BHR, you need to learn what is the best time to ask difficult question, it's definitely not in the morning.
If we see BHR's eyes and smile, we know she up to something. PSH made mistake, yes he admitted it, he wants a divorce but you won't sign the papers. You said you can't trust him anymore, so now what's remain is revenge to satisfy yourself.
I have been experienced this. I cried but not because i lost my love, but cried in the shower because i pity myself. So, yeahhh, i know that feeling. And we shall see BHR's next steps in the next next episodes.
when feelings changes the honorable thing to do is try to work on marriage or end it gracefully . He did not do anything . He never communicated to his wife that he is falling out of love because of his behavior and never talked about divorce because he keeps checking out .he basically worked on marriage issues with mistress LOL and mistress as a solution offered to sleep with him.
i believe in Korea he has no right to serve divorce papers to wife when there is no wrong doing from her side. He has to get a consent from her to file for divorce . That is why he tried so hard and was rude and did not give any information when BHR was questioning about affair just kept saying I cheated and I will do what you want . That is the sly lawyer in him.
when BHR and parents did not agrees for divorce he gave in reluctantly and now trying other means to keep mistress and baby on his side , even now he shows his unhappiness to wife on a daily basis and hopes BHR can agree for divorce .
i know you are trying to hard to understand him but he is a moron .
BHR is going through the process after she has been hit by storm , she should not blame herself here at all but she will because that’s how human nature works . According to me she did not do anything wrong , she has short comings but that does warrant cheating.
Her husband is also perfect and she did notice that he was being critical of her but she did not go cheating on him.
Revenge is also an emotion that wronged party feels, just because you feel PSH should get a happy ending with cheating mistress it does not
mean BHR should ignore her feelings and give in .
She will do it on her own terms . If she wants revenge , so it be it.
5 hours ago, hsmz said:But for me, I still think he pitied BHR and blamed himself for her sickness. If not, why he have to run to meet her at the hospital and stay with her by the bed? He definitely and directly said to his parents that he falls out of love with BHR. And he will agree straightaway if BHR file for the divorce and he knows what are the consequences that he will face if BHR sues him. He will gets humiliations and suchs, and he aware about that. Come on, he's a lawyer. He fully aware that he was the one who created the mess, if not why he told BHR that his dark lover was pregnant. Actually he didn't have to spill the tea that SW was pregnant & he can keep the secret till SW gives birth. He can urges BHR for the divorce without telling her about the baby, or start to live separately but he's the man who knows to responsible of his actions. Also, he didn't acts like Prof Park who directly said he was suffocated with the marriage by telling this and this about his wife's flaws. PSH didn't say to BHR directly what she has done to hurt him, maybe he wants BHR to realize by herself. Unfortunately, not. Till now, we never see a scene she asks directly to PSH why he cheated.
oh no you misread his signals in season 1 .he was so sure BHR will ask for divorce because she thought she does not care and she is too pride full.
so he first admitted to affair and showed no remorse and was very rude when she was asking questions. But then she did not ask for divorce then he dropped his next weapon pregnancy as a sure shot to make his parents agree and to get BHR to divorce.
she was so torn and out of her mind that she lets her MIL persuade to accept the baby and get him break up. That plan also failed so now he is stuck and waiting for next opportunity to see how he can get divorce and also keep mistress and baby in his life.
He is integrating mistress with his parents in hopes that they will help with keeping both in life and BHR for name sake as he cannot get her to divorce .
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2 hours ago, ktcjdrama said:
I finally watched ep.1-2 of season 2 properly today. My favorite character of the drama atm is PSH’s mother. She is a good wife and a good mother, though not flawless.
Anyway, I am rooting for the PSH to be able to get divorced and unite with Song Won in marriage. What I see is that he sincerely wants the best way out for everyone. He is willing to stay married to BHR and be her slave as long as he gets to see his child once in a while. His whole pleading with his mother to help SW out is so that he could keep his promise to BHR to cut ties with SW, be it maybe only for duration of pregnancy. At least he feels bad enough to not stress out BHR anymore by complying to her demands. I don’t see that as being meek. It’s just that BHR is way too dominant and aggressive. Sorry, but the scene of her eating alone at home, I sense a nasty scheming from her with regard to what she has proposed to her in-laws. She knows she could never get to see SW through PSH so she is using the in-laws so that she could have access to SW. It’s not difficult to imagine what she might do while confronting SW.
PSH is not being weak but he is trying to make the best arrangements for SW and their child. I consider that as being responsible. He could’ve just leave as SW kept asking him to, but he didn’t. He bothered to take time and effort to make sure everyone is happy. Of all the three mistresses, I can still tolerate SW because she is the only one who is aware and bothered by the fact that the miracle she is experiencing is bringing hurt to another person. And many times she pushed PSH away from her. She only wants the baby, but undeniably moved by PSH’s care as well.
It’s unfortunate that some of the translations on Netflix paints a different picture of what is being conveyed. One example is when PSH was pleading with his mother to help care for SW and baby.
~ English subs: “How can she (BHR) be my priority right now? I am willing to take whatever punishment there is. The baby did nothing wrong though”
~ Chinese subs: “Right now we cannot only care about HR alone. Whatever the retribution and punishment, let me be the one to bear it. The baby has done nothing wrong.”Of course I don’t know which translation is more accurate to the original language, but my point is they give different perceptions of the person PSH. Which is yet another reason why we have such diverse/opposing views here on the characters in this drama.
he is not doing it for everyone’s well being , he is doing it for himself tobuy time and keep everyone in his life .. he wants BHR to give him divorce , that’s what he said in latest episode , if only BHR agrees and he does not want to be reminded of her coughing blood , for him it is nothing much , he called it blood card.
Just talking about life ended up them having baby ... just imagine seeing mistress and baby regularly will result into what, he will officially setup a second home as he cannot make BHR agree , he wants to have both but behind wife’s back . His plan is to get them settled into a second home and then ignore BHR ..
and why does a pregnant lady needs so much care that a mistress has to meet the mother of PSH , too much ... pregnancy is not a disease .
he is a smooth talker , only BHR is not falling for it this time , hence her scheme with in-laws to move her away , may be she wants to meet.the baby card is so convenient and he knows in-laws will be totally on his side for the baby .
2 hours ago, hsmz said:Not saying PSH & SW pure and innocent. They both wrong, and need to repent and ask forgiveness towards the people they hurt. And the first chance they got to be alone in the room, they slept - showing that they can't think rationally. PSH is not in his normal state, as he just fought with his wife & SW, a lonely woman who seeing a younger man that appreciates and likes her and he is in front of her. They both are lost in their own world that nobody will understand. I also sometimes can't understand as I numerous times mentioned, why SW need to open door for PSH and why PSH need to hire her as his counselor... *tilt head to the left & right*
Sunghoon as the lead also once mentioned in the interview if I'm not mistaken, he also having hard time to understand PSH & he will portrays with all his might for the viewers to understand what exactly kept deep down in PSH's heart.
Super agree with you on this!!! As I mentioned, PSH is a lawyer, he knows so so well about the paternity suits and suchs. He trying to be as responsible as he can because he knew he's the one who created the mess. Yes, some of you directly said he is trashy husband, no different with the other 2 trashy husbands but he said he is willing to face all the punishments
True. That's why he never will tells BHR about SW, as he don't want to make the situation any worse and affected the baby. SW in her 40s, can suffers miscarriage easily. The baby is miracle for both of them, and the baby has done anything wrong. Even some of you never want to understand PSH and SW situation, and siding BHR, but can we take a minute to pray for the baby safety?
then it is a right thing not to support PSH role and don’t try to find reasons for his cheating ... cheating is cheating simple .2 hours ago, hsmz said:Heyy, don't be sorry. There's no wrong or right here. We are just discussing about the bunch of cheaters in their own world, in the drama, not reality for that matters. If you on the wife's side, it's OK. Your choice.
But for me, I still think the wife's personality and attitude is part of the contributor factors and part of the reason why PSH cheats. Don't ever forget, this is a Makjang drama, anything can happen. We never know, maybe the writer will show the dark secret of BHR - she's having a sugar-daddy or still having a relationship with her rich ex-boyfriend (using VIP rooms ofcoz)
She loves to play golf, clubbing and drinks with her friends without PSH right... And never wants to do anything with PSH, except having a dinner with him & spa session once a while. Maybe, maybe, IMO, PSH's cheating is the karma that will bite her back. Who knows and maybe one day PSH caught her. Aigooooo... Anything can happen in the makjang world right?
Phoebe, the writer-nim even can bring the lonely transparent haleboji ghost into the drama...
just to prove your point don’t go and insinuate on sugar daddy and ex boyfriends ... none of that has been shown so you should limit yourself to what was shown.Maximum you can say is she is after her in-laws money .
i hope she sues for adultry and public shame mistress , PSH , parents , get hefty money and go off with new beau ..
PSH and mistress have to get their punishment , what is their punishment is we have to see ...but can’t trust the writer who glorified cheating may not give such a closure to BHR-
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10 hours ago, hsmz said:
Hurmmm.. This is the problem in the society. Like I said, I against the cheating, but it's possible the reason of man's cheating somehow came from the wife. But we always said, once man caught cheating, he will be put into the blame 100%. I asked my mom regarding this issue, and she said... "We woman, sometimes tend to feel great and thinks we are so right all the time. We always see our spouse's fault by not looking at ours too."
So, writer-nim wanna show that, sometimes, it's not fair to put the blame 100% to the husband when he caught being cheated. Yes, in trashy Dr Shin & Prof Park's case, we can call the husbands - trashy husband as the wife seems didn't have too much lacking. Even they are a working mom, they managed to cook, keep their house clean, spend time together at home and having a good conversation with their husbands (see flashback episodes) but did you study BHR's personality and the way she treated PSH in the flashback episodes? Yeah, she just being herself like you and you said, but by being herself is reflected a bit of the reasons why her husband start to cheat. Just IMHO. No offense yaa...
I don't hate her but I don't support her and PSH too... She just lost in her own world because she's actually having unstable emotions.
What ever little they have shown of BHR , yes I think I studied her and she is what she showsher makeup is and was always garish , PSH fell in love with her beauty and then later started to dislike it .
cooking- you have seen that she is particular about food that she eats , I am sure it would have been the same when they dated just like she said there are 24 hour eating places now in Korea, so that is her likes to eat out , it is not a hidden trait
very direct - she seems to have been attracted to Seo bam but never acts on it , one time she was annoyed that he did not greet her , she got down in front of her husband and asked him that , she shows what she is as she is to her husband and everyone . Also she never entertains any male fan which is about to change now
she is vain - evident by her talk , I am
sure that must have been very evident when dating PSH also
children - she put this condition before marriage at the risk of loosing a prospective groom , so she does not hide her intentions
in-laws - she is polite when they meet but is not overtly good to them . She humors them and gets along as most in-laws do
hitting - I don’t think it was hinted that she was abusive , her catching himHim cheating made her angry , I am good with it. Husband deserved a good beating
Care : she does care for her husband and loves him. There are very few but they showed that she cares. People are hung up that asked him to sleep on couch when he had cold , it should have been good if she changed places but it is what she is . She is protecting her voice which is crucial to her job . and to think how her husband got cold because he was too thoughtful for mistress and stood outside the car in cold while she slept inside, that is his act while dating
he comes home and want to thoughtlessly jump into same bed at the risk of infecting his wife , this is his true nature
so what I feel is she never hid her actual personality , it is PSH pulled her in with hard work and glib talk just like you see now how he is working behind her to ensure he keeps seeing mistress .He is showing his actual personality to wife and his acting and sly nature to mistress .
i hope this clarifies PSH is glib talker like his mom said and he will soon loose interest and the wife is not at fault. I am god she did not
bend backwards to serve him , it would have been much more heart ache .
10 hours ago, wildcherry said:I hate all the 3 mistresses. Whatever their reasons are, they’re just that, a mistress & a home wrecker! Its not like the men hide the fact they’re married. For sure the husbands are the biggest SOB but these mistresses are no better, they have relationships & sex fully aware their partners are married & have responsibilities elsewhere. If its ok for them to have sex with someone else husband, does that mean its fine for their husbands to have affairs with some other women too, for whatever reason?
My pov of the 40s couple, well I hate the mistress just the same as others, tho other husbands are just the same level of bstd, the 40s husband is really creepy, the wife is so snobbish & arrogant especially towards her mother, I actually feel less pity for her & can’t wait to see how her reaction when she finds out her husband cheated on her, using his stepmom as his shield. I want to see how “forgiving” she would be for the sake of her daughter, just like what she told her mother. I want her to grovel the hurting words she threw to her mother. With her arrogance I doubt that she can handle her cheating husband better than her mom. Making worst, she’s having a crush at the sound engineer, when he only has eyes for the 50s wife, the woman she looks down to.
As for the 30s wife I don’t really dislike her. She is very self opinionated & speaks her mind but she has been true to herself. It is the husband problem to promise something he can’t do & too scared to confront her with his real thought. Should he confronted her as fiercely & seriously, no doubt they will fight but at least she knows what he’s thinking. Like many pointed out here, if he really craving for homecook meals, why didn’t he cook himself? Because he is just a spoilt brat who needs coddling & pampering just like his mom did to him? Who said men can’t cook? Many of the top chef are men. Instead of expecting his wife cook for him, why can’t he cook for his wife, especially when the wife working at odd hours. The 30s husband is still immature & still doesn’t know the different between love & lust. He’s been lusting after women, not truly loves them.
My thought on the 50s couple. The 50s husband is the one I dislike the most among the 3. Maybe because others are already successful & financially independent when they met their wives & they didn’t put their wives the hardship to provide for their family & to live comfortably. Perhaps he’s going thru his mid life crisis but hopefully when he wakes up from his dream it’ll be too late for him to return to his family. Tho I’m annoyed to the 50s wife who still clinging to the hope the husband will return to her again, I can understand her. For him, she sacrificed her whole life & her maiden family. It’s like her life was a nightmare. But I agree with her daughter, not to dwell on their no good father, and moves on with what left of her life, to search for her own happiness. The son is still too young to understand & to handle his possessiveness but in time, if his mom meets a cool guy who can be a better father to him, for sure he won’t need his self centered father anymore
Right on 30s couple , they just need to have good fighters airing their issues. PSH is too meek or sly he does not want to work on the marriage and just gives in as a tactic .if they fight they will know what other thinks and I think it will make way for communication and peace .
but it is too forgone now , I hate to see BHR forgiving him .
i want him to suffer and no happiness .
mistress can go to hell. She is also one sly fox , says good things but does just opposite .
40s couple - I think husband sees himself in father role to his wife , he wants to protect her and take care of her. He does not think cheating is anyway interfering with his duty .
10 hours ago, hsmz said:From my opinion, at first PSH didn't have any intention to sleep with SW. He always respects SW and from their scenes, I didn't see when PSH try to take advantage from SW, except for his sympathy hug to SW when SW cried. The hugs are not showing any intimacy intention, just like a hug from brother to sister. But, yeahhhh it's still wrong because it was the "door" that opens both feelings. And the night out at Gangneung, is something that they both didn't plan. Yes, you know sometimes you can't avoid especially when you are both all alone in the room and having unstable emotions. Even stranger can made out with other stranger. But they have known almost half a year, know each other stories and never wanna hurt each other just like PSH said, so it means, they have formed a feeling towards each other.
Don't get me wrong, I didn't defend their action, IT WAS WRONG for someone's husband to make out with other woman, but I believe they also didn't expect to make Baby Bada
He just can't win with his wife. Remember raise the dog scene? He just wanted raising a dog but his wife said this and this. Ok understand, raising a dog needs a lot of energy and time, but I guess that was PSH's plan to make BHR come home early and spend time with him without going to golf, clubbing, drinking....
And when he asked to go exercise together, she said she played drum and this and this too. Why can't she at least spend one day with her husband and encouraging him and give a full support to him?
If you watch 1st episode in season 2, PSH said he can cook. I think he didn't want to cook and eat by himself. Yes, some people are like that, they didn't want to eat all alone at home (but can if at restaurant). In the first flashback episode, PSH wanted to heat the foods, but BHR went out even telling him. Maybe she texted him but is it so hard to knock the bathroom door and let your husband know that you wanna go out? Put yourself at PSH's shoe, what do you feel? That's when I realized, he just don't like to eat alone at home.
Finally, I can conclude here, PSH is the one who always tried hard, but BHR just take him for granted.
Your explanation for PSH actions is too much.
normal men and women don’t plan dates with side chicks or acquaintances just like that that too behind the backs of family .
the first chance they got to be alone in the room , they slept ha ha ha ...
So please don’t tell me that they were both so pure and innocent people , if they were , mistress would not offer herself for sleeping with him nor he would have accepted it.
all the things they were doing is dating and they are just masking it as just talks , he lusted after her and she saw a young man who is falling for her and took her chance .
even now you see she says she she does not him want him but goes and meets the mom . If she was half serious about her good intentions , she would cut contact with him.
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6 hours ago, hsmz said:
you know, the writer-nim really made us giving our own opinions.
half of me said, PSH is so wrong to cheat, but part of me said PSH deserves to find his own happiness as he's not happy with BHR. Yes, he's wrong because he already pledged his wedding vow, but people do change, either to be more better or getting more evil, in PSH's case, he has changed 50% matured (he always said that he realized now, beautiful face doesn't mean anything if that person don't have good personality) and 50% evil because he cheats on his wife and he don't file the divorce before he cheats.
And as for BHR, I feel pity as woman as she being cheated by her man, but part of me didn't really like her because she showed the side of "wife-is-always-always-right." yes, she have her own career, a celebs for that matter, but why can't she at least asks, listens and discuss with her husband, regarding anything. yes, like SPY & Writer Lee, they're almost perfect wife to be seen, but still their husbands cheat. And I guess, the subtle meaning from the writer-nim, how good or bad your wives to manage the marriage, if the husband wanna cheats, he cheats, even with our own bestfriend. (if you have watched drama Five Enough, the main lead actress's character was being cheated by her husband. they have 3 kids, she's good at cooking, manage to clean the house despites she's busy with her career too. her husband cheated her with her own good friend whom she introduced her to get the job at her husband's office and end up divorce him)
As for SW, I pity her but sometimes angry with her. Why she needs to be "counselor" with someone's husband? Why open the door? All this thing won't happen if she shut the door. But loneliness make people have unstable heart & mental too. She's lonely, with no family around her and PSH came maybe at the right time to fill in her emptiness heart. Same goes with NGB, she's heartbroken and she met Prof Park who showed interest with her (of coz she flirted with him first) and Ami, she's so wrong to fall in love with someone's husband who kept informed her, "don't ask me to choose, as I will choose my family over this relationship." For me, she's the one who created the mess, and she can be called home-wrecker girl if Dr Shin's marriage ended after SPY found out about them both.
Unless we are in the shoes of all these people - we can judge, we can say anything, but we can never understand.
cheating world is the world that so near with us, even boyfriend/girlfriend/fiancé do cheats, not only husband or wife.
writer went ahead and showed , it does not matter how good or bad the wife is , people who want to cheat will cheat both husband and mistresses knew what they were getting into and still went there deceiving wives .
take for example 40 and 50 wives they cater to every whim and fancy of husband but still got cheated on .
actually there is no excuse for husbands , they have weak character and hence choose to cheat .
dont go blame wife , if you are falling out of love with your wife , communicate , fight or divorce , don’t go to other women to tell your sad stories . Since you are married you have an obligation to wife
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9 hours ago, hsmz said:
Agreed with some of your points.
But sometimes, showing all of our true self is not a good things either.
Situation 1
You don't like to cook, but your husband likes to eat home cooks dinner. He's OK when you are still dating when you tell him you don't like to cook but once you both are married, you need to be more tolerate right? Even you don't like to cook, but to get a beautiful marriage, why don't you learn to cook? Solely not to please your husband but to make things better so that your world be much better. Sometimes you'll never know your own skill till you take the first step.
The power of tolerates.
Situation 2
Agreed to stay childless. Yes, NO ONE should be forced to have a baby but people have feelings tho. The feelings of jealousy when see other officemate celebrate their first kid's birthday is inevitable. That's when one party have a changed heart, trying to get one but another party won't let it happen. The sad and agony feelings bite inside just like cancer & one day he or she will be tired and i guess that's when the cheating happened. To avoid cheating to happen, 2 way communication is very important. Once a while, you both must dicuss & talk about something and will get a mutual decision.
Situation 3
In laws. Yes, some in laws they adore their DIL or SIL but some of PIL only agreed to their son/daughter's choice to be married with this girl or guy. We don't have to change ourself completely just to make them adore us, but order to make them love us, we can change a bit. If previously we are a rought type of girl, wearing leather jacket, ride a superbike, smoking (your husband is so OK with it) but your PIL are not so keen about it, how about we change to be more softer so that our PIL can start to adore us. Don't try to fake it, it won't work. But try to change, start from your heart. It will definitely work.
Faking of something is completely not cool, but try to change to be more better is totally cool for me. I love to hear, "Wow! You've changed. Much better from previous."
And.. yeahh, change to be more better is good and beneficial too. Peace!
i feel you out all the onus for a good marriage and to keep husband with self on the wife.cooking - if husband wants to eat home cooked food he can cook himself or get a housekeeper . His mom anyways gives him
food but you have seen the food gone to waste because he was dating mistress and having dinners with her outside home and still comes home and blames wife ...
children - the fact the he changed his mind about children was never discussed with wife , how will one know he changed , her request on thier wedding night to him was not change . He broke all their agreements but Puta blame on wife .
inlaws - i laws relationships are for most people a stressful relation , only few will have a good relation, so I am ok with how she is with them .she does enough to maintain relationship.
lawyer and mistress are experts in hiding their true sleeves hence they went behind backs and excuses to have an affair .. there is no justifying it.
Some were saying BHR agreed to get pregnant after mistress getting pregnant.
initially here agreeing to get pregnant is her being in dipair and wanting hold on to PSH .
i think in last two episodes she is just buying time with INlaws by stating she will become pregnant when the things are little better and not so stressful. She is still not willing at this point .
i think she is just plotting now to see who the mistress is and how to get her revenge .
I hope she will
kick PSH to curb after she gets whatever revenge she wants . But ideally apart from public shaming the entire party and suing for adult Roy , not
much can be done in terms of revenge.
Her eyes are now open to the fact the PSH is a sly fox and untrustworthy
3 hours ago, hsmz said:Sorry, maybe I have a bit of conservative mind as I didn't have any girlfriends who's married or aunties who didn't cook for their family. My mother also told me, even you hate cooking and cleaning (housewife's duty), but it's part of woman's and wife's nature to do all of that, it's being a bonus if husband willing to help. And agree with you, PSH married the wrong lady. And he tried to end it, before his dark affair being revealed, but with BHR's parent's treatment in Korea, he can't. Then after the dark affair being exposed, he also wants to end their marriage, but BHR fell sick and he can't be the cruel man to ask her to sign the papers at the hospital right?
For me, their marriage is not "there" anymore, as she can't trust PSH and PSH has gave his heart to SW.
What else remain for them?
I have seen some of my friends and family members changed for the better. One of them said to me, her husband wish her to change this and that, she said NO, HELL NO since day one they met. But along the time, she changed, much better than previous and I can't believed my own eyes. That's why I believed, it's not wrong to stay as you are, don't change for other people or please them, but it's not wrong either to change if it will bring happiness to yourself and others.
Wife duties as you defined not
for 21st century LOL especially when women is going out in the world and earning her keep
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35 minutes ago, hsmz said:
That's the reality of life. Most of the man, most of them, will be attracted by the face & body of a woman FIRST. It's the fact. After a while, after know each personalities, that's when the man decide to continue the relationship. Even PSH's eomma said to herself "another older woman?" Meaning she's look on the outside first. Everybody does that. Including me. I share my true story. My bff wanted to remarry, she first married a widower with no child, then after 1 year they divorce. Later she told me will be married to another widower with 2 kids. Before i even know his personality, i said "another widower?" I judged him. Yes, bcoz i didn't know him. After a while, i know he's the best man for my bff. They have happy & healthy marriage according to my bff, for now. Hopefully till their last breath.
Back to the drama.. BHR, as her friend's said, "you still didn't show him your persona when you are angry right?" - meaning she didn't show him her real "hulk side." And we know her angry persona later, after she found out that her husband cheated on her. And regarding they decided to stay childless, yes PSH accepted it because he thinks it's the right thing to do as a husband. As a husband, he tolerates with his wife, don't want to force her, maybe becoz he's hoping someday she will change her mind & have a child together. But in order to wait for the changes, some people can be patience, some people are not...
And about the raccoon make up, yeah, she can considering a bit when her husband tells her about it. If you look at the poster at the radio station and some of their old photos at home, she didn't wear that kind of make up before. That's the easter egg we have to see in this drama. She's changed, for what I see. Maybe the timing was not right, but bear in mind, PSH was a bit annoyed at that time too coz he wanted to have a simple nice home dinner together with his wife. We all have our "annoyed" moments right & spilled something bad too in front of our loved ones. Who doesn't? But then he tried to make it up with flowers but his wife put the flowers away & still argue with him. So he was not trying to fix the problem? Why can't PSH said something that he thinks right? Why can't BHR calm down a bit, then sit together and talk. It's much better right?
The root here, just ask any man, "you want girls with beautiful body, nice butt, flawless skin OR fat, with all the cellulite and flabby, with bad haircut and face full of yellow & red pimples with bad breath too?" First impression is all that matters till we know each other personalities. Not trying to be a sexist here, but it's the reality, as I have been thru the same situation. That's when some people said, "man is all the same!"
PSH is passive aggressive , you can see him smooth talkinG his mother , mistress and wife to get his way .
It is mentioned earlier that PSH went to great lengths to get married to BHR knowing her personality ,it is also evident from PSH words that they agreed not to have kids prior to marriage and then midway his mind changed and he did not care to inform wife.
the things of BHR which he was attached to list sheen as he wanted a mother not wife in his wife . He wants a celebrity working wife to mimic his
mommy and spend her time
in kitchen . First class jerk he is , if he wants home cooked food , he should
cook himself and eat .
it is a fact that he started getting bored of BHR and he found everything she did as annoying including her eve makeup.from the conversations between mom and BHR , it was evident he was also very head over heels with his first love and then broke up ,so his attention span is limited .
BHR shows her the self to husband , she does not bend backwards to please him and maintains enough relationship with in-laws . I think in-laws also don’t like that much and it quite normal how she humors them but don’t let them run her life. They are ready to abandon the wife the moment they heard about baby .
her anger post cheat reveal is not a daily occurrence , the situation was worse and she meted put her anger at PSH , he deserved it.
PSH is a sly fox who sweet talk others to get his work down , you can see how he goes about convincing his mom and dad and will use any and every excuse .
the mistress is also a sly fox , she keeps saying PSH to stay away but willingly goes to bed with him, gets introduced to his mother in the pretext of baby , these are somethings which a person does when they want to stay away from
someone , she could simply cut contact .
I am pretty sure he will after couple of years will fall out live from
her too just as the DR said he will be looking at younger girls later .
BHR does not owe anything to him , if he felt things were not right , he should have manned up and spoke to
her instead of cheating on her .
i wish worst for this lawyer and the mistress
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[Drama 2022] Love (ft. Marriage & Divorce) Season 3 결혼작사 이혼작곡
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Posted · Edited by ferily
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She is not bothered to have lunch dinner with him post cheating , she needed to tell him her stance on divorce , for that she asked .
LOL
i am amazed at kind of excusing done for handsome cheater
she is weighing options what is best for her.
sha has no obligation to make it easy for other people . What she is doing is looking out for herself.
she has to see husband cut ties first for any further improvement.
she is for what ever reason is choosing to stay back in marriage and also tolerating another woman pregnant by husband , so for now it is enough.
her husband could not tolerate even small stuff from her and ran to have an affair , the things husband down is monumental in comparison to her faults , so yes she needs time , she cannot switch off her agony anger and be lovey dicey again.
FIL is old fashioned who does not even respect his own wife so he is peaking from male perspective but she has to look out for herself.
if she does what Gil says , PSH will effectively establish a second home , he is trying to do it now too after promising wife that he will cut ties.
she is using her capable mind to use resources at her disposal to make things better for her.
independent does not mean stupid .