Cheating mom

Long story short, my dad got brain surgery a year ago for a tumor that caused him to have a seizure at home one night. This surgery caused him to recover at an extremely slow pace. He can't move his right leg and he is more emotional now. Before surgery he was completely fine. But since then, my dad has been dependent. My mom hasn't taken this change very well. She verbally abuses him and such when she is stress, which is terrible. I finally got my dad into a in-patient therapy place that specializes in post-brain surgery recovery. However, my mom has completely changed. She has started to ignore my dad and she's acting more teenagery. She told me and my brother outright that she is dating a new guy because our dad can't support the family anymore. She is "planning" to move in with this guy in Cali because he's going to support her. She is such a messed up person. And lately, she's been asking me to take her pictures for memento purposes but really it's to send it to the guy. *I'm not that dense* so I outright refuse but she called me an ugly person. How do you deal with a person like this? Especially when she is your mother? I'm so disappointed in her.

Hey sorry to hear about your father. I hope he is on his way to a speedy recovery

Does your father know what your mother has been up to? If he knows, ask him what would be best for you to do and go from there

If he doesn't know which is probably the case, it will depend on.. well.. how old are you and your brother?

It breaks my heart to hear about your situation.

I'll pray for you and your family.

I'm not sure how anyone would deal with that. What I'm about to say isn't advice. Personally, I would just ignore her for now. I would focus on my dad's recovery and my own future and well-being. If my mom wants to go away with the other man, so be it. I won't identify her as my mom anymore. Also, I would ask my relatives what my next move should be and if they have any financial advice.

I'm really sorry about what you're going through, it sounds like you have alot on your plate. I hope you're taking time to take care of yourself, i know you have alot on you but its easier to deal with difficult situations if you make sure you're in good health physically and mentally.
As for your mom, i know you probably are really bitter towards her but try to be understanding. People get weird when difficulties arise. For example, when my dad was in the hospital before he passed, i wouldnt spend time with him, i would just fawn over one of his male nurses because i thought he looked like my ex (putting it together now, i was trying to get some "familiarity" in a foreign situation) I know it seems like a really shitty thing to do while my dad was in his last days, but you do the unthinkable to escape reality sometimes. Try to confront her about it if you can, maybe she just needs someone to tell her to snap out of it.

frenchtutor said: Does your father know what your mother has been up to? If he knows, ask him what would be best for you to do and go from there

@ayme I'm really sorry that you and your family is going into rough times.
My family also had a similar situation like this. My father cheated, he blamed my mom. It is a long story I don't want to start telling the story. I realized how my father was selfish in a way and my mother in another way. It got really angry. Because, my value and idea about love and marriage was torn apart. There is no love. It's about SATISFYING the other with X, Y , Z that were not LOVE. Since then, I was afraid to get in a relationship for selfish reasons. 
Everyone has different beliefs and values. Your mother probably wants a man that can support her, that's all what matters. That is her selfish reason to be in a relationship. 
I can understand that you are disappointed and I would be too. If I were you I would talk with my mom telling her how I feel. If she said: You don't understand me. Blablabla. At least, you tried to talk about it with her, to try to talk about it, and at least that she stops to abuse your father verbally. If she date another man that is her choice. She cheated your father, then she should divorce. You know I couldn't stop my father from hurting my mom. I don't know if you can do this.  Because we didn't share the same beliefs and values, I argued a lot with my mom, and I didn't keep contact with my father. 
It is my choice. It became like this.
I also hope that you get better advice. I mean, I shared mine because I lived a similar situation, but it doesn't mean that my advice is the best.

@MissAria Thanks for your insight. Yeah I feel the same way. Situations like this really put a marriage to the test if a person will be there when the other is down and my mom failed that test. I tried to talk to my mother but there's no getting sense into her. I'm just going to let it runs it's course. Sometimes things work out for the best ultimately and hopefully there is a tunnel at the end of this situation >_<