Ask The Fellas

[RiderKamen]

2 of my best guy friends asked me out, but i don't like either of them (not that way, anyways)

They're like my bestest friends lmao

and i don't know how to reject them.

What would be a nicer way to do it, so we'd still be best buds? :b

ionno cause people interpret things differently. You could say I'm not interested in you in this way because I still want to remain friends.

[sugarplum892]

if a guy friend always ask you advice about should i go out with this girl or that girl or anything related to another girl, is he taking me as his friend?

but then sometimes he would call me babe, love you etc...

what is he taking me as? his bff?

-why would a quiet guy who knows nothing about a girl but just her first name and that she has a twin, would like her?

i already asked this but i want to hear from more different people-how come a guy treats the girl like a stranger after she made her feelings clear that she only wants to be friends?

sry for the multiple questions

[RiderKamen]

Hohum. I've been to an all-girls school for the entirety of high school. As a result, I have guy friends but they're not mutual friends with each other so when I chill with one of them, it ends up being one on one and I prefer group outings. Would it be weird if I invited, like, four guys who are all my friends but not friends with each other to a movie or an outing? Would it be better to invite my girl friends too? (But not too many, LOL, it freaks boys out (?) )

EDIT: My 1000th post *facepalm* Why on this thread?

congrats to your 1000th post.

It all depends if you know your friends. If you know this girl flirty or that guy is confrontational, you choose the obvious decision. Most importantly, inform your friends with the 5w's: who, what, when, where, and why cause its nothing like going out with a friend and you didn't know you had to do this and hang out with these people.

if a guy friend always ask you advice about should i go out with this girl or that girl or anything related to another girl, is he taking me as his friend?

but then sometimes he would call me babe, love you etc...

what is he taking me as? his bff?

ionno if its on a friend or a best friend forever level lol. If I'm cool with somebody (doesn't have to be a friend) I'll ask for advice.

[Guest bellarose]

I have a question, why do some guys start out really friendly with a girl and then slowly distance themselves and disappear? Were they just looking for something and realized they couldn't get it?

[MrPower]

Jill does exist...i saw her fb. yeah i know mature. I've asked for a second chance...and well I kinda messed that up too. Truthfully ...I'm in that stage of moving on and lingering feelings. The thing is, I want him to make the decision for me. If he moved on, then I'll move on. Ya know? Should I still talk to him?

Oh dear. Sweetheart, you're not moving on. If you feel as though he needs to make that decision for you, you're making yourself vulnerable again... don't do this to yourself. If you truly feel as though you want to move on, make that decision on your own, and don't talk to the guy until you feel like you can handle it.

2 of my best guy friends asked me out, but i don't like either of them (not that way, anyways)

They're like my bestest friends lmao

and i don't know how to reject them.

What would be a nicer way to do it, so we'd still be best buds? :b

say that you value them as a friend, and you want to keep it that way. Tell them you don't see them as potential bfs because you just aren't attracted to them (or whatever reason). Sometimes honesty is the best way to go, even though the truth hurts.

if a guy friend always ask you advice about should i go out with this girl or that girl or anything related to another girl, is he taking me as his friend?

but then sometimes he would call me babe, love you etc...

what is he taking me as? his bff?

-why would a quiet guy who knows nothing about a girl but just her first name and that she has a twin, would like her?

i already asked this but i want to hear from more different people-how come a guy treats the girl like a stranger after she made her feelings clear that she only wants to be friends?

sry for the multiple questions

Yes. most of the time, guys won't talk about their girl problems with a girl that they like. That's a strange man. lol. giving you mixed signals. I need more context before i can really make a judgment... if he's not joking around, then he could be into you.

it's called lust.

to protect their pride. Most likely he had his heart broken, and wants to forget about it by not communicating with the girl. At least, that's my guess.

don't say sorry. it's why you're in this thread in the first place

I have a question, why do some guys start out really friendly with a girl and then slowly distance themselves and disappear? Were they just looking for something and realized they couldn't get it?

you answered your own question.

They could also be on the rebound, or found somebody else. The possibilities are endless

[Guest byebyelover]

... i started out writing a very long story but just decided to keep it..relatively short;

So this guy i've known for about 2 months now keeps telling me he really wants me when he told me halfway through hes not a relationship kind of guy (he literally said he will never be in a relationship), cuz i confessed to him i like him.

...so does that mean he only wants me physically? he's really sweet and respectful tho like.. he walks me home (okay we live in the same apt haha) but never tries to force a move on or anything.. hes always saying how he wants to kiss me or something but i'm extremely cautious (especially with a guy who's told me hes not looking lol) so i wouldn't let him haha but yeah.. we're having this weird, flirty fling thing going on even after he told me hes not looking + i told him i just wanted to remain friends then...

what do u guys think of my situation? like.. what does he ultimately want from me, something physical? thanks

some background info...:

- by weird flirty fling i mean.. we give eachother the looks.. we get kinda physically close when we're alone (closer than u would with others).. he compliments me a lot and says he wants me.. yeah lol

- APPARENTLY he was in a serious relationship not too long ago and it ended badly... he's told me hes been single for 2 years but thats not what i hear from other ppl, tho noone's absoutlely sure! so maybe he's just really hurt and doesn't want to get hurt again?

- he's 8 years older than me

[Guest Han_Hye_Ri]

Guys, can you help?

So this guy, we've known each other for two years through this program and we usually talk in Uni during lunch. We always make fun of each other. He makes fun of me too. one time, he said to his friends "hey, don't you think Hyeri looks like she just had plastic surgery?" and they all look at me and I was like "I'm natural but are you saying I'm pretty because people who had surgery look pretty~" and he just paused and said "No, I didn't mean it like...uh never mind" he blushed and smiled then looked away. I was making fun of him because of that. I have no feelings for him, he is just one of my guy friends. The thing is, everytime some one sees us messing around, they ask if we are going our or if we like each other. We just say no, so I believe that he has no feelings for me. which makes me relieved. So, like usual, this other oppa asked if i liked my friend, I said "No, I hate him" in a joking way. He laughed so I didnt think much of it. After that, He's been acting weird and not texting back and all that. But he still makes fun of me. I dont know whats going on. Can anyone help me determine what he's feeling?

[Guest illicitmercy]

Guys, can you help?

So this guy, we've known each other for two years through this program and we usually talk in Uni during lunch. We always make fun of each other. He makes fun of me too. one time, he said to his friends "hey, don't you think Hyeri looks like she just had plastic surgery?" and they all look at me and I was like "I'm natural but are you saying I'm pretty because people who had surgery look pretty~" and he just paused and said "No, I didn't mean it like...uh never mind" he blushed and smiled then looked away. I was making fun of him because of that. I have no feelings for him, he is just one of my guy friends. The thing is, everytime some one sees us messing around, they ask if we are going our or if we like each other. We just say no, so I believe that he has no feelings for me. which makes me relieved. So, like usual, this other oppa asked if i liked my friend, I said "No, I hate him" in a joking way. He laughed so I didnt think much of it. After that, He's been acting weird and not texting back and all that. But he still makes fun of me. I dont know whats going on. Can anyone help me determine what he's feeling?

Wow. Mr. Power is crazy~ Answering all those posts.

Anyways, can u elaborate what do u mean by hes acting weird and not texting back and all that? You can't just assume that he has no feelings for you based on the fact that he can restrain them when you people ask you stuff about him and he doesn't react. If I was him, I would be able to restrain it, though it would definitely hurt when you said I hate him or No about dating. About the making fun of you, I think he just likes doing it because he likes you. Its my personal opinion that he likes you.

[Guest Han_Hye_Ri]

Wow. Mr. Power is crazy~ Answering all those posts.

Anyways, can u elaborate what do u mean by hes acting weird and not texting back and all that? You can't just assume that he has no feelings for you based on the fact that he can restrain them when you people ask you stuff about him and he doesn't react. If I was him, I would be able to restrain it, though it would definitely hurt when you said I hate him or No about dating. About the making fun of you, I think he just likes doing it because he likes you. Its my personal opinion that he likes you.

Ah, thank you so much for helping~

ok what I mean by acting weird is when I ask him if he's mad at me or anything like that, he just says "no, how can I be mad at you?" and so on. He smiles and laughs like he always does but I can tell for sure that there is something different about it compared to before. Yea I felt bad after saying No I hate him to someone, but he knows I always say that to him like 24/7.

Awh, you really think he likes me? aiish...

[MrPower]

OH NOOOOOOOOOO!!

I answered all these quotes... then i accidentally hit the backspace button

Sorry if the answers seem super mean and blunt. I tried to summarize what I typed earlier...

... i started out writing a very long story but just decided to keep it..relatively short;

So this guy i've known for about 2 months now keeps telling me he really wants me when he told me halfway through hes not a relationship kind of guy (he literally said he will never be in a relationship), cuz i confessed to him i like him.

...so does that mean he only wants me physically? he's really sweet and respectful tho like.. he walks me home (okay we live in the same apt haha) but never tries to force a move on or anything.. hes always saying how he wants to kiss me or something but i'm extremely cautious (especially with a guy who's told me hes not looking lol) so i wouldn't let him haha but yeah.. we're having this weird, flirty fling thing going on even after he told me hes not looking + i told him i just wanted to remain friends then...

what do u guys think of my situation? like.. what does he ultimately want from me, something physical? thanks

Sorry again if this seems super blunt... but i think it's one of the 3

1. he's being genuine and is hurt form past relationships.

-> if you want to pursue him (which of course, i assume you do) you need to be able to be worthy of his trust, and show that you're not like the other girls who broke his heart.

2. He's messing with you. He enjoys getting the attention from you and is milking it for all it's worth.

-> If so, then ditch the fool.

3. He's lying, and playing a little hard to get or just wants to satisfy his physical desires.

-> I advise you to stay away unless you also just desire physical gratification...

bleh :<

Guys, can you help?

So this guy, we've known each other for two years through this program and we usually talk in Uni during lunch. We always make fun of each other. He makes fun of me too. one time, he said to his friends "hey, don't you think Hyeri looks like she just had plastic surgery?" and they all look at me and I was like "I'm natural but are you saying I'm pretty because people who had surgery look pretty~" and he just paused and said "No, I didn't mean it like...uh never mind" he blushed and smiled then looked away. I was making fun of him because of that. I have no feelings for him, he is just one of my guy friends. The thing is, everytime some one sees us messing around, they ask if we are going our or if we like each other. We just say no, so I believe that he has no feelings for me. which makes me relieved. So, like usual, this other oppa asked if i liked my friend, I said "No, I hate him" in a joking way. He laughed so I didnt think much of it. After that, He's been acting weird and not texting back and all that. But he still makes fun of me. I dont know whats going on. Can anyone help me determine what he's feeling?

HAHAHA OWNED. i love those moments.

anyways, it could be that he had an interest in you before, and is trying to stop his feelings from developing further. If he's doing that, then he's gonna fall for you even more and more.

or it could be playful just for the sake of being playful. don't worry about it then.

If you ask me though... I don't think it's the latter. but then again, since I don't know you in person, it's difficult to tell where your bias ends, and where reality begins to judge accurately...

Are you sure you don't like him? I would imagine that most people aren't very caring about somebody they're not interested in...

Wow. Mr. Power is crazy~ Answering all those posts.

I had some spare time at my hands... =]

[Guest JinEnjuce]

Ah, thank you so much for helping~

ok what I mean by acting weird is when I ask him if he's mad at me or anything like that, he just says "no, how can I be mad at you?" and so on. He smiles and laughs like he always does but I can tell for sure that there is something different about it compared to before. Yea I felt bad after saying No I hate him to someone, but he knows I always say that to him like 24/7.

Awh, you really think he likes me? aiish...

I think he likes you. I just think he didn't want to put you on the spot when people ask. It probably hits him hard when you say no. He probably just wants to give you your space for now.

If you wanted a definite answer, I'd have to get to know you two better. But. you're just gonna get the "60%" answer.

[Guest Han_Hye_Ri]

OH NOOOOOOOOOO!!

I answered all these quotes... then i accidentally hit the backspace button

Sorry if the answers seem super mean and blunt. I tried to summarize what I typed earlier...

Sorry again if this seems super blunt... but i think it's one of the 3

1. he's being genuine and is hurt form past relationships.

-> if you want to pursue him (which of course, i assume you do) you need to be able to be worthy of his trust, and show that you're not like the other girls who broke his heart.

2. He's messing with you. He enjoys getting the attention from you and is milking it for all it's worth.

-> If so, then ditch the fool.

3. He's lying, and playing a little hard to get or just wants to satisfy his physical desires.

-> I advise you to stay away unless you also just desire physical gratification...

bleh :<

HAHAHA OWNED. i love those moments.

anyways, it could be that he had an interest in you before, and is trying to stop his feelings from developing further. If he's doing that, then he's gonna fall for you even more and more.

or it could be playful just for the sake of being playful. don't worry about it then.

If you ask me though... I don't think it's the latter. but then again, since I don't know you in person, it's difficult to tell where your bias ends, and where reality begins to judge accurately...

Are you sure you don't like him? I would imagine that most people aren't very caring about somebody they're not interested in...

I had some spare time at my hands... =]

ahahaha. yea I love those moments too.

Trying to stop his feelings? hmmm I never really thought he could like me. My friend used to go out with him but they broke up and everytime I mention her, he gets uncomfortable so I dont bring up relationships or serious stuff like that so reality is pretty far from us.

No, I'm not interested in him. Never was. He is a good guy so I really dont want him to take his space away from me.

I'm quite guy-ish (have an older brother). So befriending with guys rather than girls is a common thing for me, but usually it turns out that 60% of my "hyungs" end up liking me. I really dont want that with this guy. He's an awesome "hyung". If you know what I mean.

and thank you for helping Mr.Power. You're awesome~

I think he likes you. I just think he didn't want to put you on the spot when people ask. It probably hits him hard when you say no. He probably just wants to give you your space for now.

If you wanted a definite answer, I'd have to get to know you two better. But. you're just gonna get the "60%" answer.

Thank you.

another question. How do I make a guy dislike me? by not doing the "opposite me" thing you see in movies like girls acting disgusting so the guy would leave....

If I dont talk to him, and take my space from him, that ould crush him hard. at least i think it would. maybe it's different with guys...

[Guest Xyeun]

Is sharing secrets such as who you like and who he thinks is cute a good way to start out a friend relationship with a guy? Just curious. Thank you!

~Nuey

[Guest JinEnjuce]

Thank you.

another question. How do I make a guy dislike me? by not doing the "opposite me" thing you see in movies like girls acting disgusting so the guy would leave....

If I dont talk to him, and take my space from him, that ould crush him hard. at least i think it would. maybe it's different with guys...

It could crush him hard, and end your friendship. Like it or not, he's probably fallen for you. Keeping him as just a friend is possible, but you're in a minefield right now; you need to watch your step. It'll involve talking to him about it. Not casually either.

Good luck.

[Guest ThePrime]

Is sharing secrets such as who you like and who he thinks is cute a good way to start out a friend relationship with a guy? Just curious. Thank you!

~Nuey

Probably not, guys don't really want to hear about other guys especially if you're just starting the friendship.

[snowytearz]

First time here.

I've got 2 guys that say 'I love you' to me a fair bit & it makes me uncomfortable.

The First guy. We chat on msn a lot. He's admitted he's got feelings for me but I don't feel the same way about him so I generally ignore any love comments he makes towards me. Plus he's got a gf ! so I don't think he should be saying all that lovey-dovey stuff to me either. Should I just continue ignoring him or tell him outright? I don't want to ruin our friendship >o<

The second guy. He hasn't said anything about liking me more than a friend but he uses 'love you' a whole lot more than I expect from any friend. Even me & my girl friends don't say 'love you' to each other! Again I'm not interested. Just want to be friends. How do I deal with this?

[MrPower]

ahahaha. yea I love those moments too.

Trying to stop his feelings? hmmm I never really thought he could like me. My friend used to go out with him but they broke up and everytime I mention her, he gets uncomfortable so I dont bring up relationships or serious stuff like that so reality is pretty far from us.

No, I'm not interested in him. Never was. He is a good guy so I really dont want him to take his space away from me.

I'm quite guy-ish (have an older brother). So befriending with guys rather than girls is a common thing for me, but usually it turns out that 60% of my "hyungs" end up liking me. I really dont want that with this guy. He's an awesome "hyung". If you know what I mean.

and thank you for helping Mr.Power. You're awesome~

you mean "oppa"

well, in that case, I suggest that you be a little nasty around him. hahaha jk.

Though you kid around with him, make it clear that you don't like him in that way...

It could be that he didn't have an interest to begin with, so only time will tell what will happen from now on...

If it comes down to it, he may ask you out on a date... if that happens, be considerate of his feelings, but firm in what you say.

haha np.. I try my best

Is sharing secrets such as who you like and who he thinks is cute a good way to start out a friend relationship with a guy? Just curious. Thank you!

~Nuey

good way? no. effective? yes.

it's one way to build up a relationship rapidly, but honestly, you're really putting yourself out there.

There's something called being yourself... you may want to try that out first

[Guest JinEnjuce]

Is sharing secrets such as who you like and who he thinks is cute a good way to start out a friend relationship with a guy? Just curious. Thank you!

~Nuey

If anything, he'll just find it incredibly rude. And never talk to you. Guys don't like to gossip.

First time here.

I've got 2 guys that say 'I love you' to me a fair bit & it makes me uncomfortable.

The First guy. We chat on msn a lot. He's admitted he's got feelings for me but I don't feel the same way about him so I generally ignore any love comments he makes towards me. Plus he's got a gf ! so I don't think he should be saying all that lovey-dovey stuff to me either. Should I just continue ignoring him or tell him outright? I don't want to ruin our friendship >o<

The second guy. He hasn't said anything about liking me more than a friend but he uses 'love you' a whole lot more than I expect from any friend. Even me & my girl friends don't say 'love you' to each other! Again I'm not interested. Just want to be friends. How do I deal with this?

Tell them outright. I don't know where people get the idea that guys understand clues and hints. They don't.

[Guest Han_Hye_Ri]

you mean "oppa"

well, in that case, I suggest that you be a little nasty around him. hahaha jk.

Though you kid around with him, make it clear that you don't like him in that way...

It could be that he didn't have an interest to begin with, so only time will tell what will happen from now on...

If it comes down to it, he may ask you out on a date... if that happens, be considerate of his feelings, but firm in what you say.

haha np.. I try my best

good way? no. effective? yes.

it's one way to build up a relationship rapidly, but honestly, you're really putting yourself out there.

There's something called being yourself... you may want to try that out first

yea I know. My oppas have asked me to call them that, but I see my self as more of a younger bro to them so i call the "hyung" , "hyung nim" etc. haha ok thank you Mr.power, you are very powerfull when it comes to answering. Fighting!~

It could crush him hard, and end your friendship. Like it or not, he's probably fallen for you. Keeping him as just a friend is possible, but you're in a minefield right now; you need to watch your step. It'll involve talking to him about it. Not casually either.

Good luck.

ok. so if someone asks me if we like each other, for my answer I'll say "just as a friend". but I will keep on being myself.

Thank you guys! you are very helpful!!~

[Guest JinEnjuce]

ok. so if someone asks me if we like each other, for my answer I'll say "just as a friend". but I will keep on being myself.

Thank you guys! you are very helpful!!~

Yeah, but you're still gonna have to talk to him, yeah? To set the record straight.