Ask The Fellas

[Guest ShadowMax76]

ok so im a first year at university. there was a guy in hs who flirted with me/ kinda led me on during junior/senior year. over the summer we didnt talk or IM or anything. we were friends only in the loosest definition. anyways, about 2 weeks ago he wrote on my facebook wall saying that he hoped i was having fun at university. i wrote back asking how he was but no answer. then a couple days ago he IM'd me asking how i was, and he said he might come up to visit.

can someone explain this? thanks

you're over thinking it.

he sounds like a nice guy. o_O' but that's a completely superficial judgement.

he just wants to see how you're going in person? o-o'

it's hasn't done much good to have one's hopes up when it comes to love interests. i believe.

[Guest yuwing]

I feel so bad ahaha I talked to this guy on msn on sunday and we ended up talking till like midnight. We just talked about people and stuff...we have these convos sometimes and it's just awesome. I was actually the one that said 'I need sleep, night'. I completely forgot that the next day he'd have to get up extra early cause he has period 0. So he was tired. He said hi on msn after school but I had a headache so I took a nap. Then later on, I had no one to talk to so as soon as he wasn't on busy (cause i know that means he's gaming) I said hi. Then the convo went like this:

'Were you waiting till I wasn't on busy to talk to me? lol'

'Yeah, I have no one else to talk to except for you and (another friend of mine)'

'I don't wanna talk, soo tired. you'll keep me up till 12 again. You had a nap.'

I just felt so badd. ._.; I just said sorry a few times and said I'll stop bugging him ^^;

I told him to sleep and he's just like 'nah' He played something for a bit then went off.

Now I'm kinda too scared to talk to him first cause I don't want to annoy him =/ For a few days before, he was the one that would say hi, show me random vids and we'd just randomly talk about that xDDD It was fun.

He doesn't seem different in class. We don't usually hang out so we don't really talk in real llife. Which is why I don't wanna annoy him or anything. With my other friends, they HAVE to put up with me xD If I annoy him, I can't really do anything and I like talking to him hahaha

So umm...what should i do? oo;

There are a few girl friends I talk with that I stay up up to 4am talking to. It's just friendship with no motives. so there you go. i say he's not interested at all lol

you're over thinking it.

he sounds like a nice guy. o_O' but that's a completely superficial judgement.

he just wants to see how you're going in person? o-o'

it's hasn't done much good to have one's hopes up when it comes to love interests. i believe.

+1 on advice

[Guest crescendoll]

okay fellas, here's the deal.

i'm almost 19, never been in a relationship.

i've been asked out a few times in high school, but you know, it's high school so i never thought much of it and rejected everyone (aha ..). everyone's kind of fickle at that age and i'm not exactly looking for a fling.

anyway, i started university and i dunno, i've been thinking of getting into a relationship? i mean, i still don't want it to be a fling but yeah. i have no idea how to go about this. i'm pretty reserved and quiet, and i'm not very good at socializing. i know, i should get some confidence and just approach a guy myself, but i don't knowww. i don't want to come off desperate either. ;o;

advice? if there is any lol.

[Guest joongielove]

just say you're uncomfortable being too close, because you don't know his intentions.

if he's actually trying to be friends, he'll apolgoize and convince you it's pure. if his intentions are not pure, then he'll go away for sure. unless he's a true bubble gum who doesn't mind stealing someone's gf

Well, I don't want to talk to him about this and have a total awkward turtle moment afterwards. o.o;

My friends also say that he needs like a mother figure, and I'm that figure. O___O;

[Guest yuwing]

okay fellas, here's the deal.

i'm almost 19, never been in a relationship.

i've been asked out a few times in high school, but you know, it's high school so i never thought much of it and rejected everyone (aha ..). everyone's kind of fickle at that age and i'm not exactly looking for a fling.

anyway, i started university and i dunno, i've been thinking of getting into a relationship? i mean, i still don't want it to be a fling but yeah. i have no idea how to go about this. i'm pretty reserved and quiet, and i'm not very good at socializing. i know, i should get some confidence and just approach a guy myself, but i don't knowww. i don't want to come off desperate either. ;o;

advice? if there is any lol.

join clubs.

[Guest mimii]

I'm just curious.

Is sex and games all guys think of? Why do guys prefer virgins?

Just really curious cause most of my guy friends are just... so... perverted and stuff.

[Guest Kizoku]

so this guy is your bf? because he sure doesn't act like it, other than inviting you to his house for a little booty call.

There can be many reasons to ignore someone. He might not care for you at all, or maybe he just wants to avoid conflicts because he's stressed about his own things. If it is the latter, then like I said in another post, a man should get his richard simmons together before wanting some pus-sy. In either case, I think you should forget him and move on. It's not healthy for you. If he doesn't show you respect, appreciate and reciprocate your feelings or have the basic decency to treat you as a human being, then he's trash.

Move on.

Thanks for the tip! I've really considered moving on, and I've even said myself it's not healthy for me. Grades slipped, and I was just plainly out of it all the time. He doesn't have sincerity when he does talk to me, and well I agree with "a man should get his richard simmons together before wanting some pus-sy". I've never really wanted to think of it in that way, initially, but even though before he told me he considered that we weren't friends with benefits, by now it's probably the cold hard truth. I knew he wanted to get intimate with me, but sometimes I thought he just didn't know how to act towards, only when we were alone and that he wanted to apologize to me personally. However, he still mistreats me and the fact that he apologized is no excuse for him to still do so.

Thanks again. ^^

[Guest Apple.Mint]

I have a quite decently long question fellas =]

Thank you for all your help through out the thread

it's nice to have guy's opinion =]

Anywayy~

My boyfriend and I broke up roughly two months ago, and in the beg. things were very hard. I just couldn't be normal around him, i would get mad or sad whenever i see him being a bit too close with a girl. Eventually i came to realization that i'm just dumb, he's over me, we're not getting back together, i need to just man up and take it like a girl! xD I still love him very much obviously but i'm okay now =] I can take him flirting with girls, I can be normal around him, basically it's like back to before we started dating. But this is the problem. He told me that we're best friends now and i do feel like that toward him, we've known each other for years and was together for a year, bestfriends is what we are to each other. However, I feel as though he's just lying...just saying that so he wouldn't break my heart which is dumb because it's already broken =].

Okay the reasons why I think he lied or whatever is because, you talk to your bestfriend no? He doesnt really talk to me..unless it's in psychology, because we have it together, and none of our other friends are in there so we're stuck to conversing to one another. I love talking to him, but to be able to talk to each other only in 4th when we have other classes together? Then when we're walking with friends, he's always like...ahead of me, and if i talk to him, i feel this..barrier. I don't understand...? I'm trying to be friends and have a good relationship but he's making it so hard. There was a lot more reasons xD but i tend to not remember bad things so i toss them out of my mind O.O But this happened today and i'm just so tired, i dont want to take this anymore. My friend coudln't give me a ride today so I had to walk, and well..walking alone around my school is creepy to me xD He has band at four so I asked him to walk me half way or something, yah know? It's safer and less lonely, at least for a short distance. He told me that his band practice starts at three so i was like.."oh" but oh well, can't help it. So when school ended, I went to my fav. teacher with one of my other best friend, we hung there waiting for the teacher to come back.. [she's everywhere i tell you] and a little bit later he came in with a friend, let's call him B and my ex A? Make it easier. Anyway A been getting close to B and i guess they're quite good friends along with this other girl too. Well they hung out there too so bunch of us are just like running around, eating Grossman [our teacher's name ] food and playing with the chinchilla o.O i think that's how you spell it haha. Well it was like pass three and he was still there, but i didnt say anything, we continue to wait as Grossman had like numerous students to talk to and crap. Then like after three ish B left so A was now alone with me, my bestie, and this other friend of our. i asked him why isn't he at band yet, since it's wayy pass three, he told me that it doesnt start until four O.O I was like "wtf? you lied to me? You told me it was at three" so he tried to defend himself saying that three was just his section rehearsal, band altogether starts at four. So i'm like..why coudln't have you walked me home then? Then he said that he was goign to band but then he saw B and decided to hang with him. I was so shocked...it took me a few min to recover. Wow i coudln't believe it...supposedly i'm his 'bestfriend' and he couldnt walk me HALF way home, which is like 10-15 min, yet he can totally ditch his practice to stay and be with B...who he said he doesnt consider as a best friend. I was mad so i went to backroom and recollected myself. He went looking for me and was like poking me, and i told him to stop because I dont like ppl invading my space and touching me unless it's my two bestfriends [girls] and my boyfriend [which i dont have but you get it...i hope lol] and he was like twisting my wrist and hurt so bad, and he kept saying why can't i touch you and stuff. Then we didnt really argue but he got mad and left. I was just like.."wtf" He doesnt like it when i touch him or even walk near him, yet it's okay for him to do it? He lied to me..always picking other people over me when i'm supposedly his bestfriend or even when i was still his gf. When others are around us, i'm invisible to him. When he wants closure, I don't mind giving it to him, but when I asked for a hug, he rejected me...

Guys..I know it was REALLY long

and I"m so sorry for asking you to read it =[

But can someone try to explain to me wth is in his head?

I'm not even trying to get him back anymore, i just want to be good friends and yet all he does is treat me like crap..

He's always making me wait for him...he'll make me wait hours on aim and i get tired and go off

then he's home and he's like " GO ON AIM!" wtf i'm not your richard simmons [ i don't go on when he does that lol]

but yeah..sigh i dont like it when ppl treat me bad especially if i treat them good

"Treat others how you want to be treated"

Thank you =]

[Guest esm90]

There's this guy I'm close to. We got chances to talk a lot lately, like chatting every night (we talked in person and on the phone a lot; lately it's facebook because we're usually doing our homework at that time). We've talked about some personal stuff too.... he's kinda shy, so I'm especially sure he doesn't go around telling everyone about his life. But we also talk about the most random things that would make other people think we're weird lol.

Anyway, for a month now... every time (four times in the past month) we make plans to meet up to do something, he ends up not showing up... and I end up waiting for at least an hour up to 2-3 hours because his phone is off so I had no idea what was going on. Yesterday the reason was because he had to stay late to work on a lab. Before that, it's mostly related to his psychoish/controlling mom. Like, it's not 100% his fault, but I feel like he could probably have called to tell me before I ended up waiting for hours. He'd leave a private message on my facebook later, or call me, to apologize

Since every time it seems like it's not his fault, I try to be understanding, and since he chose to use facebook, I replied hours or a day later when I'm already not mad. Then I just act like nothing had happened and talk to him normally again. Yesterday he called before I got over it, so I just didn't say much to him (just stuff like "yeah", "ok", "nevermind"--I normally can't shut up when I talk to him) but then a few hours later when I got home I started chatting with him normally again. He was busy so we didn't talk much, and I left him alone because I wanted to go sleep anyway.

My question is that is it bad that I kept letting it go and act like I'm not mad about it at all? Obviously I was super pissed and hurt, especially when it happened so often in such a short amount of time, but I try to let it go. I'm usually a person that's happy and bubbly, especially with him. But honestly, his efforts to apologize hadn't even been that good (facebook, wtf)

Still, because of what his mom is like (controlling/yells a lot/etc), I don't want to be anything close to what she is to him.

How would you feel if you know you did something that likely hurt the other person, but she seems to let it go so easily? Does it seem like she doesn't really care about you?

[Guest incomplete.]

curious...

Why does guy ask girl to touch his abs?

[Guest heelsoverhead]

This is really frustrating because I consider myself a fairly outgoing, have a decent personality and is above average looking--pretty.

I get stares from time to time (like every other pretty girl) but no guy ever really approaches me. I can be kinda intimidating so i've heard.

I know there's like that fear of rejection and everything, so I think I'm gunna do the approaching now. So how do i do it (especially if it's a white guy i like? if there's any difference. From experience, i know asian guys and white guys differ alot in terms of general personality) I know its a silly question as most of you are asian but i'll take my chances anyways with any advice i can get.

I just really want to have some fun, go on dates and stuff now that im in university, i just don't know how to go about doing it. Uni's such a big place with so many people in one class (200-300) so it's really hard.

[Guest super cool snail]

do guys really, truely believe that they can pick up a girl when asking them after meeting them for five minutes or less?

im really curious what their motive/point in doing that is coz there are guys who do that and..i don't understand why; what kind of girl would say yes

[Guest moonk379]

do guys really, truely believe that they can pick up a girl when asking them after meeting them for five minutes or less?

im really curious what their motive/point in doing that is coz there are guys who do that and..i don't understand why; what kind of girl would say yes

there are girls out there who does that believe it or not thus leading to ons

curious...

Why does guy ask girl to touch his abs?

mb he just got done working out lol or just want to show off his abs

There's this guy I'm close to. We got chances to talk a lot lately, like chatting every night (we talked in person and on the phone a lot; lately it's facebook because we're usually doing our homework at that time). We've talked about some personal stuff too.... he's kinda shy, so I'm especially sure he doesn't go around telling everyone about his life. But we also talk about the most random things that would make other people think we're weird lol.

Anyway, for a month now... every time (four times in the past month) we make plans to meet up to do something, he ends up not showing up... and I end up waiting for at least an hour up to 2-3 hours because his phone is off so I had no idea what was going on. Yesterday the reason was because he had to stay late to work on a lab. Before that, it's mostly related to his psychoish/controlling mom. Like, it's not 100% his fault, but I feel like he could probably have called to tell me before I ended up waiting for hours. He'd leave a private message on my facebook later, or call me, to apologize

Since every time it seems like it's not his fault, I try to be understanding, and since he chose to use facebook, I replied hours or a day later when I'm already not mad. Then I just act like nothing had happened and talk to him normally again. Yesterday he called before I got over it, so I just didn't say much to him (just stuff like "yeah", "ok", "nevermind"--I normally can't shut up when I talk to him) but then a few hours later when I got home I started chatting with him normally again. He was busy so we didn't talk much, and I left him alone because I wanted to go sleep anyway.

My question is that is it bad that I kept letting it go and act like I'm not mad about it at all? Obviously I was super pissed and hurt, especially when it happened so often in such a short amount of time, but I try to let it go. I'm usually a person that's happy and bubbly, especially with him. But honestly, his efforts to apologize hadn't even been that good (facebook, wtf)

Still, because of what his mom is like (controlling/yells a lot/etc), I don't want to be anything close to what she is to him.

How would you feel if you know you did something that likely hurt the other person, but she seems to let it go so easily? Does it seem like she doesn't really care about you?

he prolly doesn't think too much of it. cuz i do that a lot myself ><

[Guest shirotaka]

curious...

Why does guy ask girl to touch his abs?

I'm sure even you know the answer to this question. Since its so obvious but I'll state it, he is trying to show off what he has or probably doesn't really have =P.

[Guest incomplete.]

guys thanks for the answer lol

[Guest lephisto17]

my gal pals often nudge me or giggle every single darn time my crush walks past.

is it possible if he noticed this and took the hint and what does he probably think?

[Guest shirotaka]

my gal pals often nudge me or giggle every single darn time my crush walks past.

is it possible if he noticed this and took the hint and what does he probably think?

He probably does notice and thinks, does she like me. -.-. If you're asking if he likes your or not, don't ask us ask him.

[Guest lephisto17]

He probably does notice and thinks, does she like me. -.-. If you're asking if he likes your or not, don't ask us ask him.

ah thanks =)

urgh darn it. *hides face*

[Guest swtangel]

REPOST

hi guys,

how can i tell whether my ex is still interested in me or is just being friendly? can you give me examples of how he would act if he still liked me versus how he would act if he only liked me as a friend? that'd really help. thx

[Guest teriyaki]

my gal pals often nudge me or giggle every single darn time my crush walks past.

is it possible if he noticed this and took the hint and what does he probably think?

I love it when this happens. lol. Guys notice this stuff pretty well, we're also pretty good at hiding the fact that we notice