Hidden Art

[Guest DK.]

guess whose back??

It's me D 3K4Y. Yeah yeah.. it's rare to see me post on soompi now.. (BTW, damn soompi changed!) but college got me busy as heck.. i miss them summer days.. lol. SSB WHERE YOU AT?! anyways, writing lyrics is a must and i still do it on a day to day basis.. What sucks is that here I can't record comfortably.. which is why i basically whisper in this song.. but just wanted to drop something.. to show i'm still alive.. Sidenote: compare Rough1 to Rough2.. Rough1 is how the finished product will sound.. Rough2 is merely all the lyrics.. rough2 was one-taked, horrible i know, but as i said, just wanted to drop something new.. i was actually happy with rough1 tho.. Soundclick Lyrics: My poetry painting images like Vince Van Gough, I’m like a graff artist, except a mic vandal, I possess hidden skills that you could only dream of, With picture-perfect form, like Adriana Lima, Mastering the arts, with the pen and the pad, I'm trying hard just to show you, all the dreams that I had, Telling stories with rhymes, you could consider me an author, But if I didn't rap, no one would even bother, To listen, but i'm trying to make moves, By that I don't mean from the couch to the kitchen, Damn this beat is bitching, got my head spinning to it, Spitting fluid, who woulda knew it, that D could do it, Pursuing my dreams, I got my head up in the clouds, I’m so unique, easy to spot, within a crowd, And I’ve been allowed to be, whatever I choose to, Taking different forms, but don’t let it confuse you, This life I’ve cruised through, just like a breeze, Only to find out, the essence of me, Is I’m an emcee, who does it from the heart, Trying to bring beauty back into this art. C/C's appreciated. thanks.

[ritzy!]

nice lyrics.. i can't judge rap lol

[Guest fantasiimaker]

Hahaha SSB needs to release more XD Good luck with college =)

"To listen, but i'm trying to make moves,

By that I don't mean from the couch to the kitchen," <--Lol I like this part.

You have a gift for writing lyrics Nicely done. I'd like to hear you make a full song with singing added (and perhaps you singing in it ;D)

[Guest fakeplastictrees]

daebin OPPPPPPPPPPA JJANG!!

WOO BAKSOO!

BOGOSHEEPUH<33

btw, i likee(;

[Guest thesarahchong]

Wow, I sense improvement.. (ha, like I know anything about rap.. but still)-- it's gooood. I like the lyrics a lot.

[Guest c3n8g]

the beats are really good.. you got the rapping thang down.. yeah.. nice.. sweet..

good luck with college... btw, it's nice to hear some good rap once in a while..

[Guest Thao]

Telling stories with rhymes, you could consider me an author,

But if I didn't rap, no one would even bother,

I especially liked that part for some reason.

You did great, I really liked the beat, keep it up hon.

-- Thao

[Guest luvjunjin0819]

nice beat....nice lyrics...can't wait to hear the final product!!!!!!!!! keep it up!!

~Tab

[Guest animagelet]

With picture-perfect form, like Adriana Lima,

Ohoho. I love the comparison. =] She sure fits picture-perfect..

I love your sound. =] Lyrics are nice =) Great job. Hope to hear more from you.

[Guest DK.]

thanks guys, its very much appreciated. as far as the beat comments go, i did not make this beat.. id like to make that clear.. im in the process of trying to learn how to sample, but that will take me a while.. this is my first time tho that people were actually quoting my lyrics, and 3 different ones too lol but that was a pleasant surprise.. glad u guys liked them.

lisa - i've tried and failed that singing/rapping thing lol.

[Guest hmaster]

Personally I've never been a fan of the west-coast poetical lyricism style. If it suits you, then I suppose that's cool, but technically there's nothing overly brilliant in it's structure as a verse, i think.

To listen, but i'm trying to make moves,

By that I don't mean from the couch to the kitchen,

like that line for example. I can't figure out for the love of god how that rhymes.

Flow is off and certainly not on point. You have too little words for the beat, whereas I have too many when I kick a verse. Rap is just an extension poetry recital. It should flow.

Your consonant usage sets the pace and vowels space it out and fill up the gaps. It's choppy here and there. Try placing more emphasis on the use of the multiple rhyme to improve your flow. it usually helps in most cases.

For example:

You wrote:

My poetry painting images like Vince Van Gough,

I’m like a graff artist, except a mic vandal,

first line flows great, has timing and everything.

second line is what lets it down. You write in the punchline style of writing where you have the usual setup/punch or witty line happening and the punch here is non existant. Grammar is incorrect too.

I say:

My poetry's painting mental images like Van Gough

so dedicated I got carpal tunnel holding mic handles

there we go.

A three syllable multi (like van gough/mic handles), and gets across how dedicated you are (you're so ill you really did get an ailment just to rap). Flow's perfect given the beat spacing as well.

You're getting there bro. Stay up.

EDIT: on a second note gough's O sound is more of the O in golf not like the O in gopher.

[starforme]

I know nothing of rap.

I like rough two because it sounds more secure and closer? There was more energy and deliverance in the message. Your words mean a lot and are deeply connected to you, yet can also be a common thing with others. Which then connects the whole circuit. I like that.

[Guest True_Critic]

OM HY GOSH.

you are so good!! >_<

I'm so used to judging people that aren't that great and.. wow.

I was soooo surprised!!!!! >_<

you sound so professional! I listened to it twice!

your voice is PERFECT for rapping

awesomeawesomeawesomeawesome

I'm ur #1 fan !!!!!!

[Guest DK.]

hmaster - thanks, i appreciate that.. dont think anyone has made that long a response in a while.. i get the typical replies that dont necessarily help me improve, so thanks.

sacred - imo i like 1 because it doesnt put you to sleep.. but interesting observance.

true critic - lol i'm surprised with that reply.. after looking at the name, i expected some hate but thanks! glad you like.

[Guest babiixru]

okay after reading your comment for hmaster i will super cc you lol

omina o_o. you've improved! some lines were good since you had enough words for a verse, but like hmaster (david) said, some verses don't have enough words in 'em.

those were some sexy lyrics devin =)

i liked how you "split" the lyrics and like em let it flow into the next line, that sounded awesome.

and when you said "vandal" i was kinda expecting an increase in pitch but it's all good

AND!~ i also liked how you paused after listen, to emphasize where the kitchen gets its uh complementary rhyme. but the pause is kinda weird sounding since you'd expect something more flowy. i think you should have added more words in between listen and the rest of the phrase and it would still have rhymed and then you would have made ppl wonder: i just heard a rhyme but with what?! o.o.

i know waht you mean. it's so weird recording in a dorm when everyone can hear you since you have paper thin walls >___>. anyways, getting bakc on track, gj =) and like i said before, you improved, your rap well id ont know the technical terms but you sound more um "african american" than before LOL >_>