Losing Your Virginity?

[Guest dreamskye.]

I lost mine a few months ago when I was 19. My bf and I just broke up a few days ago but I don't regret losing it to him for a second. At the time, it felt like it was the right time. We were both so in love with each other. It's a shame we ended up not working out but definitely no regrets

[Guest dot.1430279747]

I'm still a virgin but I can see myself losing it with the man I am with now.

[Guest swedishstereotype]

I don't believe in marriage, so i can't see why you should wait til marriage. But not sleeping around either, it should atleast be with someone you feel that you can trust and be comfortable with. I'm 16, an the majority of my friends have lost theirs. I haven't. Thing is, i don't want to. I could never ever see myself being so close to another person. It is so private, and i am kind of scared of it x).

Recently I found out that one of my closest friends lost hers. She was drunk and they didn't use protection. I've always respected her 110%, thinking that she is a cool person. But now, i don't know. I know that it is her choice and as long as she wanted it, but still i do not feel the same way around her.

Now you know

[Guest tinnny]

I've seen a couple of comments about how your views on this relates with the environment you were brought up in.

I'm from a Islamic religion, which I'm sure at least some of you know how strict it is about such things. However, I don't believe in religion, particularly mine, so my view greatly differs, despite how I was brought up.

With that being said, I'm current 19 and will soon be 20. I am still a virgin and I'm proud to be one. It's really hard to save it though, especially if you're in a relationship with someone whom you like a lot. And that is exactly what I'm going through right now lol. I don't particularly believe in sex after marriage because I think it's impossible (for me at least). Cause I plan to have a long term relationship before I think about marriage and that is simply just not fair to my bf as well. But sex is something that happens naturally. Just like your first kiss. It's something you can plan on but when it comes to actually doing it, it's all natural and you can't do it unless you are ready.

Regarding age though, I honestly don't like the thoughts of teenagers having sex, but if you are mature enough to handle the responsibility and handle it mentally, then its fine. To each their own, right?

[Guest kimmmm]

its all cool. If you want to save it for marriage, thats fine. If you have regular urges, hey, we're only human. It really depends on how secure you are about your sexuality and sex drive.

Plus, I don't personally believe in the sex before marriage. For most of the people I know, who are homosexuals, that isn't much of a choice for them since they cant get married (over in Aus)

[Guest secretxtears]

I'm still a virgin and I'll be nineteen this year. Honestly, I think my virginity is important to me to an extent. I don't believe in sex after marriage and I'm quite neutral to the fact that people lose their virginity before marriage. I think the only thing I go by is losing my virginity when I think it's time to lose my virginity. In my opinion it's probably why people feel regret if they do lose their virginity because they weren't ready to lose it yet. It's funny because being nineteen to me it seems like I'm still young. But to others  being nineteen and not losing your virginity is like-- where have you been? Haha. Actually keeping your virginity through these times are really hard because there's a lot of pressure too from your boyfriend, friends, and sometimes even parents. Actually in my life I was expected to lose my virginity first out of all my cousins. Now that my sisters growing up I'm in a panick too because it's odd when your younger sister loses her virginity before her older sister right? Right. But I still feel it isn't the right time for me, and possibly not any time sooner either. But to those who did lose their virginity and thought it was the right time props because you felt ready and that's how it's suppose to be (: 

[Guest xo.-wo.ai.ni]

I'm 17, and I recently just lost my virginity.

I do believe that it should be given to some one you really love and care about. And that it should be done for someone who you'd like to be with for the rest of your life.

I lost mine, complicatedly?

I do feel that girls who are sleeping around at such a young age and being little tramps without a bit of dignity in them is disrespectful to themselves.

I lost mine to, trust, care, and love.

I may be young, but I'm mature enough to understand the complexity of the situation. And I do feel that age does not matter when you lose your virginity, (old enough to understand, and deal with it. like.. 16+), I believe it's how mature you are with it.

I mean, if you're a really anti-sex, or sex after marriage person. Then please don't judge people who already lost their virginity and say it's disgusting! It's completely immature and RUDE to the others.

I mean, you need to be considerate and understand that NOBODY is a perfect happy little virgin out there, and NOBODY can maintain being a virgin till they're like, I don't know. 32?

My point of fact is, to all you people who believe that sex should be for after marriage (how I use to feel), well, nobody is perfect. And I can't be perfect.

I lost it to a person that I care, love and trust so much.

So, please, calm your hormones.

[Guest phalken]

I mean, if you're a really anti-sex, or sex after marriage person. Then please don't judge people who already lost their virginity and say it's disgusting! It's completely immature and RUDE to the others.

I mean, you need to be considerate and understand that NOBODY is a perfect happy little virgin out there, and NOBODY can maintain being a virgin till they're like, I don't know. 32?

My point of fact is, to all you people who believe that sex should be for after marriage (how I use to feel), well, nobody is perfect. And I can't be perfect.

I lost it to a person that I care, love and trust so much.

So, please, calm your hormones.

While your first paragraph made sense, the next two completely derailed what was initially a decently phrased reply =/

I think I speak for a lot of sex-after-marriage-belief people when I say maintaining virginity until after marriage isn't about being "perfect", or sometimes even about a purely moral belief. I think you're exaggerating and over-generalizing when you accuse us of expecting people to be "perfect", and your emphasis on the "nobody" is really unnecessary and just.. not true. I hope you realise your stance towards us is just as rude and immature as your perceived stance towards yourself.

I already replied to the other thread about virginity, but to rehash for the sake of clarification here I suppose. I don't really know what you're even trying to say about the "happy little virgin" line, and I hope you don't believe that people who refuse to give away their virginity until marriage are somehow all unhappy o_O Because that actually just makes no sense. And actually, people CAN maintain being a virgin until whatever age they want. Illogical arguments do little to help your case, and just make you seem more overly defensive and aggressive =/

When I say for some people it's not necessarily even a moral issue, I mean: have you considered that some people are actually just not emotionally comfortable with losing it to someone unless they have a fairly solid form of commitment from that person? Sure, marriage doesn't mean you'll definitely be with the person forever, but if someone's marrying you, it's usually a pretty solid sign of how committed they are to you. Especially for someone with a history of sexual abuse like me, that kind of perceived security is very much important and necessary.

I'm not trying to attack you for your beliefs. I think it's fine for people to lose their virginity to people they trust and have thought about the consequences. It doesn't make them somehow a worse person or whatever.

I'm just trying to point out how outrageous your comments towards sex-after-marriage people are. They are, in fact, very disrespectful, which is ironic given that you seem capable of realising when others are being rude and immature to you.

[Guest xo.-wo.ai.ni]

While your first paragraph made sense, the next two completely derailed what was initially a decently phrased reply =/

I think I speak for a lot of sex-after-marriage-belief people when I say maintaining virginity until after marriage isn't about being "perfect", or sometimes even about a purely moral belief. I think you're exaggerating and over-generalizing when you accuse us of expecting people to be "perfect", and your emphasis on the "nobody" is really unnecessary and just.. not true. I hope you realise your stance towards us is just as rude and immature as your perceived stance towards yourself.

I already replied to the other thread about virginity, but to rehash for the sake of clarification here I suppose. I don't really know what you're even trying to say about the "happy little virgin" line, and I hope you don't believe that people who refuse to give away their virginity until marriage are somehow all unhappy o_O Because that actually just makes no sense. And actually, people CAN maintain being a virgin until whatever age they want. Illogical arguments do little to help your case, and just make you seem more overly defensive and aggressive =/

When I say for some people it's not necessarily even a moral issue, I mean: have you considered that some people are actually just not emotionally comfortable with losing it to someone unless they have a fairly solid form of commitment from that person? Sure, marriage doesn't mean you'll definitely be with the person forever, but if someone's marrying you, it's usually a pretty solid sign of how committed they are to you. Especially for someone with a history of sexual abuse like me, that kind of perceived security is very much important and necessary.

I'm not trying to attack you for your beliefs. I think it's fine for people to lose their virginity to people they trust and have thought about the consequences. It doesn't make them somehow a worse person or whatever.

I'm just trying to point out how outrageous your comments towards sex-after-marriage people are. They are, in fact, very disrespectful, which is ironic given that you seem capable of realising when others are being rude and immature to you.

Okay okay, I went a little over board up there.

I do admit to being a total hypocrite, but sometimes, topic like these are so touchy for people.

YEAH it was much of an over exaggeration.

All in all, you make a very good point too.

[Guest Eru]

Evolution supports having sex at a young age.  If you think about it scientifically, this is the period in people's lives when there are hormones driving lust, youth is abundant, and our bodies support.  Of course I'm talking about puberty.  Anything before that is just slightly weird, for example, 11 year old children losing their virginity. 

The only reason losing your virginity at a young age is stigmatized is due to societal expectations and standards that have evolved.  Evolution's main goal is create a living creature that can reproduce successfully and plentifully. 

Sadly, due to the same culture that shuns sexual intercourse at a young age, it has led to less immature teenagers and etc. due to the coddling of young kids and sheltering them leading to a painful lack of maturity and responsibility in MOST kids.

My 2 Cents. 

Disclaimer: I have not stated my views nor implied them within this comment, I am just offering a scientific perspective.  Everyone is entitled to their own opinion so long as it is not vulgar and crass :]

[Guest OBSCURITY xxx]

Not really going to put my own personal opinion on losing virginity and sex at whatever age and whatnot, but I do agree with some people who say that it also depends on the environment that you were raised up in. If you're surrounded by friends who are all kind of conservative about the subject and who value and see their virginity as something special, then it's probably easier for you to commit to not losing your virginity until whatever time you think is right.

[Guest RyanSaid]

I'm 29 and I lost my virginity at 17. I don't think it's a big deal to have premarital sex...

[Guest Marrehj]

I lost mine a few months ago when I was 19. My bf and I just broke up a few days ago but I don't regret losing it to him for a second. At the time, it felt like it was the right time. We were both so in love with each other. It's a shame we ended up not working out but definitely no regrets

It was almost the exact same for me. Lost my vigintity almost a year ago to my bf at the time and then we broke up a few weeks later, but I feel no regret what so ever. It felt right to do it at the time and for me my virginity never felt like a big thing or something to take very serious. My only thoughts was that it had to be with someone I love(or at least thought I loved ) and not just to "do it". I know that alot of people think it's an important thing that should be saved but for me it's never felt like that and i guess it's kinda good that I've lost it because if I die tomorrow, at least I wont die a virgin

[elley]

I grow up with a religious family my parents...devoted Catholic. I'm not saying I don't like being a

Catholic but I'm not that kind super religious person. They're always remain us that virginity is really

important...and I believe with that...time goes by...I grown up with believing being virgin. After at age 24

I have this kind of serious relationship and I believe this is the guy i want be with end. I give it but sad to say

it was not a happy ending. Lossing a virginity does not mean you lost half of your life. I'm not saying it was

right but you have think it twice and you have regret...that's life, you have to learn your mistake.

As much you could wait to the right person and after marriage...should be happen.

[babugracie]

I'm 17 and recently lost mine. No regrets because I love my boyfriend. I think that one day if things didn't work out for us I'd still not regret it because at that time I really loved him a lot. Truthfully I was kinda scared hearing stories about jerks who go out with girls to have sex then dump them right afterwards. I was scared my bf was like that but somehow we still ended up doing it a month after going out. Thankfully we're still strong. I know we havnt gone out that long. Only half a year but I feel like what we have is something really strong. I don't think there really is an age to when you should lose it. It's just the moment that feels just right for you. Be it premarital or after marriage. But I definately think it's a limit to people say 13/14 and younger because they havnt experienced much and not as mature. And especially definitely not losing it for fun or if you're drunk. I think people should at least for their first time, save it for that special one.

[dorothy yap]

Just be yourself and be confidence ... (**REMEMBER TO HAVE PROTECTION for not having any unwanted babies**)

That is a personal choice but just remember ... no one can force you or pressure you (I still think not to lose it but society change so no choice)

What is peers pressure? That is just so lame excuses ... come on ... are you telling me you don't have a brain of yours?

What others are doing ... there is not a need to follow is just so brainless.

Let say if in a grp of 9 and only you are still a 'V' you should be proud rather than being pressure.

[Guest Wingedbunny]

I lost mine when i was eighteen. I lost it to the same boyfriend as i have now and i don't regret it. I didn't believe in sex after marriage personally because i didn't think i'll would get married in the future (still don't know about that). I don't really care what other people do though since it's their personal preference...

I have a friend who is saving herself for marriage, a friend who lost it during a one night stand and another who lost it at age thirteen and doesn't regret it. I think it's all up to what you think is regrettable. I wasn't stressing about my age at all even though other people tried tell me that i was horribly late as a joke.

I just dislike people who think i am lower/cheap compared to them because they are still a virgin and i am not. Well get a trophy or something i don't care