Ask The Fellas

[MrPower]

^I usually just lurk this thread for similar situations but I'd like to thank you (if that's possible) for answering questions and giving your thoughts so quickly and with such insight. I love your posts^^

haha thank you for reading them.

I try my best most of what i say is from personal experience...

=] ty again

[Guest dewy_tear_drops]

I know some ppl have told me that guys won't just randomly start a conversation with a girl unless he has an interest in her. But how does a girl know if the guy is actually interested, or he's just being friendly?

[Guest T_Sport]

I know some ppl have told me that guys won't just randomly start a conversation with a girl unless he has an interest in her. But how does a girl know if the guy is actually interested, or he's just being friendly?

If you're total strangers and you guys have a conversation and when its over you realise he didn't want anything, didn't ask a specific question that benefits him, but purely made conversational talk, then its probable he's interested. If it's because neither of you know anyone because you have just started a club or classes, it's less likely because everyone is just trying to meet people.

Just see how much they chat to you, if they always come back to you and go out of their way to chat to you, he's probably interested.

[Xkumagorobeamx]

I have a question.

So I met this guy from my gym. I usually just smile and say hi to him that all. But I really want to start up a conversation with him. I'm kinda shy when it comes to him, I don't know what to say to him.

So guys!

Can you give me some ideas on what I should say to him D:

[MrPower]

bleh. just ate a crapload of food D:

I feel a food coma coming... so excuse me if I'm nonsensical

I know some ppl have told me that guys won't just randomly start a conversation with a girl unless he has an interest in her. But how does a girl know if the guy is actually interested, or he's just being friendly?

usually.

tone. it's all about tone. how does he talk to you? how did he approach you?

look for these things

1. physical contact (if somebody is interested in somebody else, they're more likely to want to touch them in some way.)

2. flirting. <- obvious lol

3. posture. does he lay back and look relaxed? or are his eyes bigger, leaning in, and maintaining eye contact with you?

I have a question.

So I met this guy from my gym. I usually just smile and say hi to him that all. But I really want to start up a conversation with him. I'm kinda shy when it comes to him, I don't know what to say to him.

So guys!

Can you give me some ideas on what I should say to him D:

well, go introduce yourself first of all...

make some excuse to talk. the first thing that pops in my head is to ask him what exercises he does/what his diets consist of.

compliments work too. in my opinion, they're the best way to get somebody talking about something~

[Guest fredinsac]

Dude here

I was just wondering what you guys do with gifts(such as clothes) from your ex gfs. Do any of you still use/wear them or do you just throw them away? I kinda have some and they're still in good condition. Would it be i dunno kinda weird if I still wore stuff from my ex?

Never throw anything away. If you like it keep it. If you don't like it try to sell it for some money or donate it to charity. Atleast that way it's of some use to someone.

[Xkumagorobeamx]

well, go introduce yourself first of all...

make some excuse to talk. the first thing that pops in my head is to ask him what exercises he does/what his diets consist of.

compliments work too. in my opinion, they're the best way to get somebody talking about something~

haha yeah i introduced myself already. But then just ended in awakward situation and I just told him that i got to go. xD

[secretlyjustyours]

Theres this guy that i have a crush on and me and him are really close, we sit next to each other in math class so one day my friend put makeup on me and she goes:

friend: doesn't she look so pretty?

him: uhhh

friend: right?

him: I don't like to compliment girls.

and i was just like wtf, and it was really awkward. then he goes: "you look different though..oh! i know, its because you're wearing makeup."

then i was like, "yea." and just did my hw.

then he moves a strand of my hair away from my face!

and the rest of the class I just acted really weird towards him.

My question is:

Does he not want to compliment me because he thinks he'll lead me on? and what was up with him touching my hair?

[Guest ny-sw / ny_sw.]

so for the past couple of weeks, i've been dating this guy almost exclusively and my friends tell me that he's definitely into me (we spend at least every saturday and most of fridays together and apparently we flirt, even though i don't see it).

last weekend, i thought the date was going super awesomely and we were hugging goodbye (no we haven't kissed yet and yes, we're in college), when he asked me if i was free tuesday to do something, and i said nah, i had work.

so we were like. alright let's do something wednesday.

so wednesday rolls around and i wait for him to text me with plans or something but by 4pm he hadn't, so i texted him and was like 'so any plans?' and he responded that he had already gone home for thanksgiving and that he wouldn't be back until saturday.

so we made tentative plans for saturday and i said i would text him then.. which i'm not sure if i want to do anymore.

just to be clear, my problem isn't that he went back home, it's that he didn't tell me before he left that he couldn't hang out, etc etc.

does that mean that he's just not that into me or was he waiting for me to text first? and what should i do? i found this extremely disrespectful :/ i also wanna be like 'look that wasn't cool' but.. i'm pretty sure he''d interpret it the wrong way.

any help is much appreciated, thank you!

[Guest em_vanilla]

ThePrime: Thank you! I've just been pondering those in my head for quite some time and I didn't feel that it would be appropriate to ask the friends of mine. Hahaha. And thanks for apologizing on behalf of the whole guy population....lol. ^^

[MrPower]

Theres this guy that i have a crush on

Does he not want to compliment me because he thinks he'll lead me on? and what was up with him touching my hair?

he most likely not wanting to lead you on.

Maybe that was bugging him?

you already have a huge bias towards everything he does, and I doubt that he has an interest at this point. sorry, but that could change in the future.

does that mean that he's just not that into me or was he waiting for me to text first? and what should i do? i found this extremely disrespectful :/ i also wanna be like 'look that wasn't cool' but.. i'm pretty sure he''d interpret it the wrong way.

any help is much appreciated, thank you!

he most likely forgot. If you two hit it off as well as you described, that's the only thing i can think of on this food intoxicated brain of mine.

next time, if he does it again, then say "try not to be so forgetful next time " or something along those lines.

[secretlyjustyours]

thanks alot ! i guess i'll talk to him about it, we're going on a date afterall haha

[MrPower]

thanks alot ! i guess i'll talk to him about it, we're going on a date afterall haha

oh wow. asked you out within 1 hour eh? good luck~

[Guest dewy_tear_drops]

If you're total strangers and you guys have a conversation and when its over you realise he didn't want anything, didn't ask a specific question that benefits him, but purely made conversational talk, then its probable he's interested. If it's because neither of you know anyone because you have just started a club or classes, it's less likely because everyone is just trying to meet people.

Just see how much they chat to you, if they always come back to you and go out of their way to chat to you, he's probably interested.

usually.

tone. it's all about tone. how does he talk to you? how did he approach you?

look for these things

1. physical contact (if somebody is interested in somebody else, they're more likely to want to touch them in some way.)

2. flirting. <- obvious lol

3. posture. does he lay back and look relaxed? or are his eyes bigger, leaning in, and maintaining eye contact with you?

Thanks for the replies guys

I actually have two more questions

1) The other day me and my friends were talking, and one of them said that this happened to her recently and she was wondering if the guy was interested in her:

She was getting her hair done at a hair salon back in Asia and there was a guy who was working there as a hairstylist assistant. So this guy kept talking to her the whole time she was there, not continuously...but through her 4 hour-ish stay he'd try to start up a conversation whenever possible. Asking her things like what she's doing, what does she study at school, any interesting stories based on her major, when she's coming back to Asia on break again (he knows she's studying abroad but home is still in Asia) and stuff like that. And when she was going through her itouch and reading random stuff online, he'd ask her what she was looking at/reading and stuff.

The reason why she thinks he might be interested is because hair assistants practically never initiate conversations with the clients unless it's phrases such as 'this way please' or what not. She said the guy did leaned towards her when she talked but doesn't know if it's because she spoke softly or because the hair salon was loud. There was physical contact, but that's only because of his job. And as for eye contact... does having eye contact using the mirror count? (She said that he's usually behind her so when they did look at each other, it's through the mirror XD)

So what do you guys think? Is he interested in her or is he just being really friendly?

2) When a guy is interested in a girl, and they don't know her like the story of my friend stated above, is the guy attracted because of the girl's outward appearance or something else like the way she interacts/acts towards other people?

[baoi]

why do boys flirt with other girls in front of their gf??

[Xkumagorobeamx]

oh yeah.

Whats the first thing a guy notice about a girl?

And how can you tel if the guy is interested in u or not?

D:

[MrPower]

Just came back from black friday shopping... so tired... so a lack of patience & intelligence may be present in this post...

Thanks for the replies guys

I actually have two more questions

1) So what do you guys think? Is he interested in her or is he just being really friendly?

2) When a guy is interested in a girl, and they don't know her like the story of my friend stated above, is the guy attracted because of the girl's outward appearance or something else like the way she interacts/acts towards other people?

Just being friendly.

both. but initially the outward appearance.

why do boys flirt with other girls in front of their gf??

many reasons. to arouse jealousy, to show he has options, whatever. Same reasons a girl would do that in front of their bf.

oh yeah.

Whats the first thing a guy notice about a girl?

And how can you tel if the guy is interested in u or not?

D:

looks.

many signs. posture and tone are the main giveaways in my opinion. it depends on the situation really.

[Xkumagorobeamx]

looks.

many signs. posture and tone are the main giveaways in my opinion. it depends on the situation really.

Oh. How about the way a girl dresses?

And what if the girl is just walking pass by him and just saying hi

[Guest lala1111430262341]

So i met this guy at my summer job, and we're all students. We had an awesome time partying and hanging out with the rest of the students there during the summer 3 months. One time we all got drunk and my frd asked him what does he think about me, and all he said was that "she (referring to me) is a cool friend". My job term ended in august, and i had to return back to school while he continues his workterm there. However we continued to remain in touch and hang out ocassionaly..

Recently i've realized that there are a lot of things he said/did seems to be hinting sth...or maybe i was just thinking too much...so i was wondering do these following things mean/signals anything?

+He always msgz me on msn, (and through e-mail when he's at work) everyday

and he seems to be up wahtever i'm asking him to do or plans to hangout, (a.k.a never says 'no' to my plans or requests..)

+He remembers everything I've ask him to do

+He always talk abt the fun moments and jokes we've shared in the past, and always emphasize how his life becomes black and white after i left.

+He 'accidentally' left me his sunglasses on the last day before i moved back to my city, and later told me tha ti can keep it with me.

+He always try to find opportunities for us to hang out. (It would take him 1.5hrs to get here), but sometimes seems like he's not so willing to hang out if it's just me and him...But i can see that he always tries hard to find others to come out w/us, and disappointed when nobody could come out.

+He said many times how it's so nice to be single =/

+He jokes infront of our other frdz at work how i am his pretended gf =/ (it was only supposed to be an inside joke between him, me and other mutual frd of ours)

+he always let me take his rm when we were hanging out @ his place although there was a guest rm that i could hv shared w/another frd

I'm getting confused by his words. Sometimes i felt like there's sth betwen us. Other times i felt like i'm just thinking too much. He simply considers me as a very good friend perhaps?

Please help.

sorry for the long post

[Guest ThePrime]

oh yeah.

Whats the first thing a guy notice about a girl?

And how can you tel if the guy is interested in u or not?

D:

First thing I look at is her hair, and then her eyes.

If a guy is interested then he'll give you a lot of attention. He'll ask you questions, and in general try to get to know you better. He'll zone in on you and wont get distracted by things around him -- but i guess that's only if he's really interested. If he's curious about you and shows the correct body language then it's safe to assume that the guy is in to you .

Oh. How about the way a girl dresses?

And what if the girl is just walking pass by him and just saying hi

For me, a girl has to REALLY TRY to dress bad to make herself look unattractive haha. I dont want to say that guys don't care about how a girl dresses because they do, it's just that if they dress normally then they'll still be attractive in the guy's eyes if he's interested. Then again, if a girl makes that extra effort to make herself look good then guys do notice, they'll be glancing just that extra second

What if a random girl just walks by and says hi to me? I'd think that she's pretty friendly, but it does depend on her body language and her tone. Most guys would be more than happy to have a conversation with a random girl especially if she was the one that said hi first