Guest flyhigh1030 Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 So I just want some feedback from other people about this topic: How do you feel about dating more than one person at a time? For ex. Let's say this one guy met this girl and has been talking/flirting with her and going on dates but has been doing the same thing with two other girls. Mind you, this is before he decides which one to ask out and make this gf. He's also not official with any of them. Opinions? I browsed through the pages and couldn't find a thread about this. My personal opinion, I'd say its a little iffy for me but as long as he makes a clean breakoff once he chooses one I'd say alls fair Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhshiney Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 It really depends on the type of guy to be honest and where he "draws his lines". I mean some guys are able to have sex with girls he goes on date with but yet there not officially together and still date other girls at the same time. You get some guys who would just see what options he has and choose which one he connects with more then just forgets the others.Personally for me, i'm just not that type of guy. i would only try date one girl at a time, but it also depends how much connection too. but if i did ever have more than one option, then yes i would do a "clean break off" if i find someone i really like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 I'm not okay with it. If a guy multi-dates, then he's not the right guy for me. If I found out he was seeing someone else, I wouldn't be interested in him anymore. It's a deal-breaker for me. Official or not. I don't care. If it's not only me, I'm out. There are plenty of guys that are like me, so I'll stick to these types of guys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ReplayMVP Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 I actually do that. I've never had it held against me by anyone. When I become more exclusive, I drown into that person and the other's kind of just eventually flake off with time. That is also because I have a tendency to not put labels. I just discover each person as the person they are and the one who seems to keep my attentions soon gets that most of it and eventually the others just kind of fall out.It's mostly talking anyway. It's strictly flirting. I don't just eff around or even kiss unless I start catching feelings and yeah everything above just occurs; The others just flake off and the person I'm really feeling it for gets my attention.Only thing I problem I've had from this is that I have to learn to actually cut off from guys I'm definitely not into at all but otherwise, it's been working for me.I wouldn't mind it the other way around though. Some guys like to have sex during this phase with a bunch of girls but that's a no-no for me. I'm not an FWB person. I'll talk and flirt but that's all.For your scenario I don't mind it as long as there's a clear transitions to becoming exclusive and then we'll see about getting official. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest flyhigh1030 Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 so what if it was the girl that was doing this?like the girl is seeing three guys at a time? because i feel like it's like this:guys date three girls at once? player.girls date three guys at once? hoeeee.why can't girls be players? lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ReplayMVP Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 I am a girl hahah. Hm. I've personally never had a problem with it except for really hurting some egos, if anything.For your second point.Well, I think it's if they're having sex with all the guys they're seeing but plenty of guys do that too.But like you said, it's a double standard thing but I know for dudes who follow FWB rules, they respect it when the girl does too but admit the girl becomes less attractive when they give themselves.And not only that I don't see it as a problem as much unless the girl did the FWB shizzle, got exclusive and left the guy heartbroken because she wasn't feeling it. But hey, guys are look upon as D*uches for doing that nowadays too.But still the double standard kind of still exists. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest flyhigh1030 Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 oh screw the double standardsi'll do whatever the f i want lol just wanted the general public's (or soompi's public?) opinion on this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ReplayMVP Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Go do it, girl. You do you! Live ya life <3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 there was a thread about this somewhere way back when.i think i mentioned my 2nd date rule.if at any time you have a 2nd date with any 1 person. that is it. you completely cut off all other people. first date is fine because you are sorta getting to know them. if there is a second date it implies u are seeing where this may go, and thus the begining of "the pursuit"if a guy asked u out once and never called u back, sure u'd be hurt a bit, but u'd get over it pretty fast right? if a guy called u back, texted u for a while, asked u out AGAIN, and u start to get hopeful start to like him, then suddenly he tells u he has a gf, how much of a scumbag is that?!being a player has a definition and an implication. the definition is someone who has romantic ventures with multiple people. this is bad, even guys think this is a sleezy/scummy move to pull. however the implication of being a player is desirable by women, and this is good. means ur strong, smart, handsome. good personality etc. girls usually rate popularity not amungst other girls, but by how much guys like them. there was this sorta fat girl in my high school way back, she was hugely popular with girls, probably cuz she was nice and funny? i dunno, but she was not popular with guys cuz she was heavy and not so pretty. she was not considered popular, why? she was very popular... but what matters is popularity with guys.so a guy player is basically saying "popular girl" also, when a guy is a "player" he is most likely spending his own money to "woo" the girl, a female player manipulates the guy to spend his money.... so arguably a woman doing this is much worse than a man doing this. a woman can steal a man's heart, and his money, while a man can steal a woman's heart only, and will STILL be giving up money regardless to pay for gifts and entertainment and travel fees etc.these are generalizations, i have been treated out by girls before, but it is rare. like straight up she asked me out and said she'd treat me to dinner etc. its super rare for this to happen. women usually do not make the first move.next thing that happened? nothing. i had fun, got a free meal, etc. there is a difference between pick up artist / spitting game, to being a player. the art of attracting the opposite sex does not mean you do it for bad reasons. being a player doesnt mean ur smooth with the ladies either... it just means you cant be loyal to 1. so as you can see, being a player is not a good thing. it is the implications that are good. like "you sure are smooth with the ladies" which is a good thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest flyhigh1030 Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 ajlee613 said: however the implication of being a player is desirable by women, and this is good. means ur strong, smart, handsome. good personality etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raymondc27 Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Since I'm a guy if iknew the person II'm chasing is seeing 3 other guys I'll probably back out and find someone else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 raymondc27 said: Since I'm a guy if iknew the person II'm chasing is seeing 3 other guys I'll probably back out and find someone else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raymondc27 Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 Exactly. I would dip too...if the guy was seeing 3 other girls I mean, lol. I'm pretty sure most people will dip in a blink of an eye lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2014 Share Posted March 29, 2014 raymondc27 said: raymondc27 said: Since I'm a guy if iknew the person II'm chasing is seeing 3 other guys I'll probably back out and find someone else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raymondc27 Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 Me too. Some people are turned on by competition, I'm turned off by it. But I'm a bit old school (even to the point of naivety). I've stopped talking to girls before when I found out that they were also talking to other guys in a romantic sense, even before we were officially dating. I prefer to pursue girls who give their attention/time to one person at a time, since I'm that way myself. That said, I don't think negatively of girls/guys who multi-date, it's just not my thing. There are tons of guys and girls out there who are perfectly fine with it (even prefer it). Yah I'm more traditional and the jealous type. I rather have her full attention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest flyhigh1030 Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 @raymondc27 I like jealous types because I think its cute how they try to be cool but you can see through them haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raymondc27 Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 @raymondc27 I like jealous types because I think its cute how they try to be cool but you can see through them haha To bad thing for me is you can tell I'm richard simmons lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DeejayS Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 "collect then select" tried to do this, but my conscience won't let me , (tried this so i can get back at all the girls that cheated and screwed me). but hell i can't really hurt girls feelings even if i wanted to, and i think it's hard to get into a relationship without trust, and seeing one person at a time i think it's hard to admit to someone you like/love, unless you can openly lie about it, or you're that good to hide it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest flyhigh1030 Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 @DeejayS haha "collect then select"i like that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DFO-King Posted March 30, 2014 Share Posted March 30, 2014 I'd say he's quite lucky or skilled to be able to have 3 choices. It's technically not cheating since he's deciding which girl should be his gf. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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