Rolos
-
Posts
505 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Content Type
Profiles
Forums
Events
Posts posted by Rolos
-
-
I'm not sure if anyone has noticed this but I think it is quite common...at least speaking from what I have seen.
A lot of women from China (I can't speak for the rest of Asia) tend to expect men to get the bill and pay for things if on a date. I have friends who think like this and probably wouldn't go on a second date if the guy didn't pay full. Once in a relationship, they also expect boyfriends to get presents for them on special occasions, but won't give anything in return. Having said that, they all treat their boyfriends really well in other respects, it's just this money factor that seems to have such definite boundaries. Maybe it's to do with the culture and how people have been brought up, the whole 大男子主义 (male chauvinism?) is still pretty common. Some Chinese males I know even openly admit they act like this, and believe their girlfriend/wife should do the housework whilst the man provides financially. So in a way, over the years, women have been conditioned to think that's all they're capable of and there is this tendency to listen/obey to what their male counterparts say. In return, there is significant pressure placed on men to meet certain criteria, e.g. to own a house, have a nice car, stable job with high income - if you watch some Chinese dating shows like 非诚勿扰 (youtube it), as long as the man has all of these, then there's a high probability that he'll leave with a date...even then, it's only a probability (looks will be taken into account, though some men will appear more attractive and good-looking after revealing they're rich)
Obviously this isn't as prominent now in China, there's been lots of focus on couples splitting the living costs, both genders contributing in some way to ease the burden of the other. There's even been dramas dedicated to this AA style living. However, if you go into everyday life, it's more likely that the male is paying.
Personally, I think its unrealistic to ask males for so much when a female might not have considered what they can actually bring to the table. Why should the guy do all this? Because she's pretty? What happens when someone prettier comes along? Looks will fade with age. Yes there's going under the knife, but no amount of surgery is going to combat the effects of nature when someone's 60.It's much more desirable to have a husband who will love you however wrinkly you get, rather than one who bases a relationship on appearance. Of course keeping groomed and looking good is still important, which is kind of a paradox...I think the main thing is finding some middle ground and steering clear from the extremes. Don't go too overboard with focusing on superficial factors but don't disregard them altogether either.
I just think with the current mindset of a large majority of society in the East, who probably have been conditioned over generations, getting out of thinking in certain ways is a hard habit to beat, but not impossible. -
With people posting jokes like women being in the kitchen making sandwiches, overly manly man being scared of nothing, is it any wonder society makes judgments about gender roles??
Until men can get pregnant and women can grow something *down there*...there is always going to be this 'men should get the bill more often' mindset.I'm pretty sure if the genders were reversed and men gave birth to babies, expectations would be different.
My bf usually pays for dinners even though I say to split. So rather than focusing on that so much, I pay for the cinema instead, and get him random gifts if I see something that I think he'll like. It doesn't have to be a strict 50/50 split with bills, just have to show you are taking into account how the other person might feel. -
speedredefined said: i recently posted a shirt on here i thought was awesome that i wanted to get but a vast majority of females here didn't find it funny at all. gonna try again, can i get female opinion on a snapback i want?
http://www.tokidoki.it/shop/hats/bring-it-hat.html
P.S. Why do girls feel the need to take a guy's fresh hat off their head and wear it??? You don't see guys take a chick's purse or other accessory and wear it. At least buy us a drink first. Hands off my #snapback!! -
I clean my room weekly..and the bathroom.. and the kitchen... I hate cooking in a dirty kitchen haha.
-
oysters, foie gras, partridge, duck, chocolate mousse. I didn't eat all of this myself
-
^we've discussed many times and agree with each other. I am just curious as to what others would do.
He won't actually be moving for at least another year..
I think for me, love/starting a family> career, whereas for him, it is probably what @radiocat said, career > love. So I will be moving with him when the time comes. But sometimes it does feel like he had already decided that I was going, even before I had said anything, which I have mentioned to him.
I would have liked to have been given the choice of whether to go with him or not, even if it meant coming to the same decision.
-
^youre going to get all different answers because those questions rely heavily on ones personality.
but to answer your questions, i follow where love leads me. whether my partner wants to follow me or not, that is upto them. i am sure that there will be another guy here that will be completely opposite.
Thanks for your input I guess I actually want to see varied opinions, so I can see both sides of reasoning..
-
Say you're in a serious relationship and you are both in the same country right now. You could go to a different place where you will definitely have better career prospects (family connections etc), or you could stay with your girlfriend in the same country, where it would be harder to get a job/further your career (there are also language difficulties, pressure from your parents to go to the other place as they are also there).
1) Would you stay or would you go? 2) If you did go, would you expect your girlfriend to go with you? -
people change their socks??? WHAAAAAAT
no wonder no one likes to sit next to me.. -
ahh seafood...see food...
-
I regret nothing -
I use the Clinique cream shaper for eyes in 105 chocolate lustre. It gives a softer effect compared with liquid eyeliner and doesn't smudge at all after a day's wear.
-
Gives me a good reason to clean out my bag...I had lots of receipts and gum in there
Balenciaga city
mini notes and pens, bunny tippex, Fendi sunglasses, mini clinical medicine handbook, USB, 5 Gum tempest, YSL touche eclat, Rohto lychee eye drops, Chanel face powder, Issey Miyake eau du parfum, No. 7 hand cream, LV vernis wallet, Purell gel, Sanitary holder, LV keyring and keys, Eve Lom lip balm, Docomo SH01B, iphone, itouch, X mini speaker.
-
Haha that's a LOT of mixed meat...
I remember getting a free box of cornflakes when I bought the bottle of oil. Not sure how they go together either...
-
I'm so deep in sleep I usually never hear.
If I do pick up... will most likely answer with a seriously croaky old lady voice.. and secretly curse them for waking me up from a good dream.
-
China
Female
5''3
42kg...93lbs?
-
it sounds like such a sin using the word 'confess'
-
missing my flatmates.
it's not very fun with only one person in the kitchen.
-
pah don't listen to the 'you're not allowed to date' phrase!
it's lodged into our parent's brains they say it out of reflex.
parents just don't want their children getting hurt (or failing exams) and dating might just do that. date if you want, when it comes to it, it's your decision.
-
can you just be like how you used to for one day please
-
Fundamentals of Anatomy and Physiology...errrgh. why is it so huge.
-
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
it was so so looong. ok so maybe they wanted us to get our money's worth but seriously...over 2 and a half hrs arrrgh
-
The Interpretation of Murder by Jed Rubenfeld
I don't plan on killing anyone
-
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGH.
;aljdf;oaierjosigrbhs;oeirjteorijohjdogihbjsoihjs;iojg;iorejgto'ihbjtir
that is all.
For the guys who complain about girls expecting them to pay for most dates
in soompi hangout
Posted
^yeh I remember they set up a few fake 'hand-holdings' because the audience were complaining about some of the contestants lol. Did you see the woman who said 'I'd rather be sat in a BMW crying than on a bicycle laughing'? .....wanted to shake some sense into her, but then again it's a clever way to get attention.