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31 minutes ago, severus said:

 

I feel like you should have aimed for mid January instead...

 I see, now thing was when i mentioned end of Feb, she was like " im still feeling full from the last time ", being i only asked her liek a week and a half after the first time we went out.

seeing how this has gone and your response, i have a feeling she does NOT want to hang again. LOL. didnt even think i was that bad. faaaa, slap to the face mate. haha

Might be a bit upfront and just get her to come out for lunCh instead in the coming weeks, if that doesnt work or fails....than.......

its a solo carpark sesh with 20 McNuggets for me for quite some time. hahaha

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Guest severus
21 minutes ago, TRaNz said:

 I see, now thing was when i mentioned end of Feb, she was like " im still feeling full from the last time ", being i only asked her liek a week and a half after the first time we went out.

seeing how this has gone and your response, i have a feeling she does NOT want to hang again. LOL. didnt even think i was that bad. faaaa, slap to the face mate. haha

Might be a bit upfront and just get her to come out for lunCh instead in the coming weeks, if that doesnt work or fails....than.......

its a solo carpark sesh with 20 McNuggets for me for quite some time. hahaha

 

Hahahhah, I'm sorry that was very funny to read.

"I'm still feeling full from a week and a half ago, will feel full for another month. Maybe we'll hang out next year, who knows when I'll be hungry?" is what I think she's saying. But I may be wrong. 

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2 hours ago, severus said:

 

Hahahhah, I'm sorry that was very funny to read.

"I'm still feeling full from a week and a half ago, will feel full for another month. Maybe we'll hang out next year, who knows when I'll be hungry?" is what I think she's saying. But I may be wrong. 

 

bbaaaaddd ayee, worst. LOL. few of my friends i told said the same thing, like.....how the heck can you be full from one dinner outing for like a month. hahaha.

goodLOLs.

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17 hours ago, TRaNz said:

" im still feeling full from the last time "

I agree with @severus here (for some reason, that tends to happen more often these days...). 

The catching up was nice for her too, but she's not interested. You're a casual friend, no more than that, unfortunately. 

Whenever you ask a girl out for a second date, don't aim for 2 months later. Make it a week or two later, tops. She needs to remember you, you know :) It won't help if the image she's got in her head about you and your dinner together, has already crumbled, vagued out and been replaced with other memories.
You're interested in her, you should show that interest. By asking her for a second date 2 months later will only tell her you're not that interested in her or make her confused to say the least. Unless you've got a good reason like you're being shipped to some far off country, or something.

Best would've been to just tell her at the end of that dinner that you enjoyed it and would love to do it again. Most likely she'll answer something like "yeah, we should", in which case you should come back with "okay, I'll reserve a different restaurant for next friday/saturday at 7 pm. I'll pick you up at 6.30.". Don't give her (much) room to get out off her previous statement.
If she replies with "Sorry, I can't", you ask what day and time suits her best. If she's reluctant to tell you, you're not interesting enough for her. Otherwise, she'll immediately give you a different date and time that do suit her (or she'll get back to you).

Ah well, lesson learned I guess :)
 

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On 2/6/2016 at 10:07 AM, severus said:

 

Now I'm even more confused with your definition of stingy. What's wrong with carrying your own weight/ doing it yourself?

 

of course there's nothing wrong with paying for your own stuff etc. what I'm trying to say is that if you meet a guy who isn't very considerate to your needs or even your family for that matter then maybe he's not the one for you, or you're not the one for him. for example, dating a guy who's basically a freeloader which makes him stingy in this sense

On 2/8/2016 at 6:27 PM, TRaNz said:

mmmmm, guess this would be an easy one for you guys.

 

At the start of January i went to dinner with an old friend whom i havent seen for like everrrrr. Dinner was awesome, we talked heaps and connected well, both surprised we hadnt hung out sooner.

Anyway, spoke to her about a week and a half after that, mentioned that we should go for dinner again soon, probably end of Feb.

Now, am i rushing things by asking too soon or going to slow or did i shoot myself in the foot by setting some time frame (ie: end of Feb)?

OR am i best just sitting in the carpark at McDonalds destroying a 20 McNuggets while watching the Taylor Swift 1989 concert?

 

 

well usually some girls like it if you let them know one-two week notice if you can see them again. but by the way she told you, it looks like she's not up for dating anymore. if you still like to hangout with her, then make it clear to her you're only hanging out with her as friends only. this way, you don't have to pay for her food etc

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9 hours ago, CamelKnight said:

I agree with @severus here (for some reason, that tends to happen more often these days...). 

The catching up was nice for her too, but she's not interested. You're a casual friend, no more than that, unfortunately. 

Whenever you ask a girl out for a second date, don't aim for 2 months later. Make it a week or two later, tops. She needs to remember you, you know :) It won't help if the image she's got in her head about you and your dinner together, has already crumbled, vagued out and been replaced with other memories.
You're interested in her, you should show that interest. By asking her for a second date 2 months later will only tell her you're not that interested in her or make her confused to say the least. Unless you've got a good reason like you're being shipped to some far off country, or something.

Best would've been to just tell her at the end of that dinner that you enjoyed it and would love to do it again. Most likely she'll answer something like "yeah, we should", in which case you should come back with "okay, I'll reserve a different restaurant for next friday/saturday at 7 pm. I'll pick you up at 6.30.". Don't give her (much) room to get out off her previous statement.
If she replies with "Sorry, I can't", you ask what day and time suits her best. If she's reluctant to tell you, you're not interesting enough for her. Otherwise, she'll immediately give you a different date and time that do suit her (or she'll get back to you).

Ah well, lesson learned I guess :)
 

 

2 hours ago, rosierosie said:

 

of course there's nothing wrong with paying for your own stuff etc. what I'm trying to say is that if you meet a guy who isn't very considerate to your needs or even your family for that matter then maybe he's not the one for you, or you're not the one for him. for example, dating a guy who's basically a freeloader which makes him stingy in this sense

 

well usually some girls like it if you let them know one-two week notice if you can see them again. but by the way she told you, it looks like she's not up for dating anymore. if you still like to hangout with her, then make it clear to her you're only hanging out with her as friends only. this way, you don't have to pay for her food etc

 

 

yeah i see, its odd, but then i suck aye. well at least i know not to drop my guards and only see her as a friend since its wayyyyy in the beginning and not too far in.

She messaged me today about a really fancy pretty restaurant to check out before it relocates interstate.......so i asked if she would go with me, she agreed so thats cool.

But yeah that being said, i will only see it as friends, wont let myself go. haha.

Thanks guys.

 

man reading back a few posts, feel pretty stupid to let it slide that long aye....man i suck at this business. hahahahahaha

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^ it's okay practice makes perfect. who knows maybe she'll like you more as you hang out with her...but yes, don't let your guards down. it's a good sign she ask you out to dinner again whether as friends or not. girls usually don't ask out a guy unless she has some interest in him or she likes him as a friend

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1. what's the height cutoff that you would date for an asian guy? (specifically korean if that matters, i'm aware the average korean is taller than chinese)

2. how tall are you?

3. do you care that the guy is just 3-5 inches taller than you or do you want him to be a specific height, llike >= 5'10" or >= 6'0"

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20 hours ago, curiousgoat said:

1. what's the height cutoff that you would date for an asian guy? (specifically korean if that matters, i'm aware the average korean is taller than chinese)

2. how tall are you?

3. do you care that the guy is just 3-5 inches taller than you or do you want him to be a specific height, llike >= 5'10" or >= 6'0"

 

height is very subjective to all people. just be a kind, humble being then you'll be fine

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On Friday, February 12, 2016 at 4:42 AM, curiousgoat said:

1. what's the height cutoff that you would date for an asian guy? (specifically korean if that matters, i'm aware the average korean is taller than chinese)

2. how tall are you?

3. do you care that the guy is just 3-5 inches taller than you or do you want him to be a specific height, llike >= 5'10" or >= 6'0"

I wouldn't know if Korean men are taller than Chinese men but don't they also add height in their shoes? For me, I would like it if the guy is taller than me. It would be nice if he was 5'10" or 6'0".

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@halfmoonsmile

Smile at them and eye contact. Once they notice, look away. That will drive guys crazy. If they are interested as well, they will come over and talk to you. If the guy has any guts. 

If they keep failing to notice, just go up to them and say hi and introduce yourself. All that stuff about how guys don't like girls who are assertive is BS. Guys will appreciate it. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I'm new to ''Soompi'' but I got only 1 question for you girls...
There's a girl that I like a lot, the words will never cover that ''lot'', she was with another guy for a month and he broke up with her even tho something didn't feel right about their break up I met up with her on Wednesday we talked, not much, she told me that she hates him, that he's an richard simmons, can't even find more horrible words than this ''richard simmons''. I told her how I felt even tho there were like 4 girls I actually liked up till now, her included. Nothing happened cause she wanted to met up with her girl friends to talk about me I guess from what the phone call was about, she didn't really hid while talking on it or anything, she is really open as well. Next evening we all met up with 2 of my male friends and 1 of her female friend from the group. After an hour of talking and listening to the music I kissed her, second after that she kissed me like 2 times after that. After I had walked her home she kissed me directly once more even tho I was expecting it to be on the chick. Next day, she writes a message to me: ''Sorry I'm not ready for another relationship yet, I still love him and all that...'' word by word translation exception is his name.
What I would like to get as a reply is the whole clarification of this mess if not the tell me why can she say all those things about him and still love him and on top of that why would she kiss me if she still loves him ?

Thank you all in advance!

EDIT: Our mutual friend told me that she wanted to be with me and both evenings she kept saying that I'm a ''very very nice guy''... :'(

2 hours ago, Vukasin Cekic said:

I'm new to ''Soompi'' but I got only 1 question for you girls...
There's a girl that I like a lot, the words will never cover that ''lot'', she was with another guy for a month and he broke up with her even tho something didn't feel right about their break up I met up with her on Wednesday we talked, not much, she told me that she hates him, that he's an richard simmons, can't even find more horrible words than this ''richard simmons''. I told her how I felt even tho there were like 4 girls I actually liked up till now, her included. Nothing happened cause she wanted to met up with her girl friends to talk about me I guess from what the phone call was about, she didn't really hid while talking on it or anything, she is really open as well. Next evening we all met up with 2 of my male friends and 1 of her female friend from the group. After an hour of talking and listening to the music I kissed her, second after that she kissed me like 2 times after that. After I had walked her home she kissed me directly once more even tho I was expecting it to be on the chick. Next day, she writes a message to me: ''Sorry I'm not ready for another relationship yet, I still love him and all that...'' word by word translation exception is his name.
What I would like to get as a reply is the whole clarification of this mess if not the tell me why can she say all those things about him and still love him and on top of that why would she kiss me if she still loves him ?

Thank you all in advance!

I am sorry for the vulgar words, but I'm literally going crazy...

// MOD EDIT: if you know it's vulgar, why use it? I've removed the vulgar words 

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On 3/5/2016 at 2:17 PM, Vukasin Cekic said:

I'm new to ''Soompi'' but I got only 1 question for you girls...
There's a girl that I like a lot, the words will never cover that ''lot'', she was with another guy for a month and he broke up with her even tho something didn't feel right about their break up I met up with her on Wednesday we talked, not much, she told me that she hates him, that he's an richard simmons, can't even find more horrible words than this ''richard simmons''. I told her how I felt even tho there were like 4 girls I actually liked up till now, her included. Nothing happened cause she wanted to met up with her girl friends to talk about me I guess from what the phone call was about, she didn't really hid while talking on it or anything, she is really open as well. Next evening we all met up with 2 of my male friends and 1 of her female friend from the group. After an hour of talking and listening to the music I kissed her, second after that she kissed me like 2 times after that. After I had walked her home she kissed me directly once more even tho I was expecting it to be on the chick. Next day, she writes a message to me: ''Sorry I'm not ready for another relationship yet, I still love him and all that...'' word by word translation exception is his name.
What I would like to get as a reply is the whole clarification of this mess if not the tell me why can she say all those things about him and still love him and on top of that why would she kiss me if she still loves him ?

Thank you all in advance!

EDIT: Our mutual friend told me that she wanted to be with me and both evenings she kept saying that I'm a ''very very nice guy''... :'(

I am sorry for the vulgar words, but I'm literally going crazy...

// MOD EDIT: if you know it's vulgar, why use it? I've removed the vulgar words 

 

well if she doesn't say it to you then she probably just lonely and is just relying on you to get over her sadness

since your mutual friend told you she wants to be with you, then ask her and tell her how you feel. sometimes being a nice guy is a good thing, it means she cares about you. 

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Sorry if this is long I cant make threads yet and I really need help :S

Girls, what should I do in this situation?

Yesterday, I met a girl online chat app, this girl was really pretty so I told her and she answered with "thanks cutie pie", i took this as just a polite "thanks" and didnt pay much attention to the nick she put me, because is one of those nicks that girls use to refer to friends (?) and we had just met. I was in a part of the app in which where you talk to random people and I was paired with her, and really didnt want anything serious with her, she was cute but i just wanted to talk to people. The rest of the conversation went almost normal because I ended up treating her somehow bad (i feel sorry now, but as I said i just wanted to talk to people, I didnt want anything with her) and saying bye, to what she answered "bye cutie pie" again I didnt pay attention to the nick. A couple hours later I decided to revive the conversation, because I decided I wanted to have something with her. This conversation was even weirder because when I made the first question she didnt answer even if she answer almost instantly when i said "hey", i thought she was like "this guy treats me bad and still thinks he can have something with me" so I said i was sorry and would leave her alone, she then sent me a pic with a sad face and then sayed im doing my homework. I told her i didnt wanted to bother her and we could talk later to what she answered with "-_-". I took this as a "I want you to talk to me" so I kept talking. The conversation got even worse because she only answered to 1/3 questions (literally); this happened for like 2 hours and after that she didnt answer my last question on that day, i didnt care but I was really wierded out.

Later that night (about 11pm) she said "good night *cute nickname*". Now I know girls sometimes text in the night because they want us to talk to them the day after, and I was surprised she did it, so i said something like "you are still alive! are we gointg to talk to tomorrow?", to what she simply said "Yep" so I said "see you tomorrow then. Have a good night princess". She sent some emoticons and it ended there.

The next day I was i was a little bit excited because (now) i wanted something with her, and it seemed lie she wanted something too, so i started the conversation, and it went just like the last one. At the end I was bored because I thought we both wanted something with each other, yet she didnt answer so I said "You know, i'd love to you now you better, but its so hard to talk to you" she answered with some emoticons and "Tomorrow".

Im not sure what should I do or say tomorrow? Is she really interested in me? Its really weird I dont now what to do :S

 

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  • 3 weeks later...
Guest omochi
On March 19, 2016 at 7:46 PM, sveagle said:

Im not sure what should I do or say tomorrow? Is she really interested in me? Its really weird I dont now what to do 

 

 

From what I understand it's as if you guys are unknowingly playing mind games on eachother. You were disinterested when she was interested...then interested when she was disinterested (she probably became disinterested "after" your initial behaviour. It's not a pretty way to start a relationship that's for sure but if you really want something I'd highly suggest cutting the online talk short and setting aside time to meet up in person. It is very possible to change someone's first impression of you to something more positive this way.

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