Ask The Ladies - Read First Post

[Guest junkers]

Lol. When I was younger (high school), I would have said I don't know even if I really wanted to say yes.

Now, I would say "yes, I would really like that. Here is my number. And I guess we can figure something out."

If I were to say "I don't know" now, it probably means that I am really not interested in you. And I am just trying to figure out if I should give you a chance or buy time to figure out a way to say "no" in a less hurtful way.

So the answer depends. Did she say "i don't know" in a shy way while trying to hide a smile? Or did she say it after an awkward pause?

One time she was just like "mm i dunno" with the "i dunno face or unsure face" no awkward pause. The second time was on the phone "MMM i dunno" same thing.

I know i should just tell her straight up cuz thats more like me. But since you guys ask, i might as well just answer. i only wanted to ask

"do girls dont immediately say yes when asked out by a guy? Would they say something like iunno i'll see if i can this weekened so they dont sound too desperate?" but id still like to hear you guys. please thanks.

[spark]

so this is not really about "love"

its about what you would do in a situation where.

you were being nice to a guy. (online btw)

and trying to just have a nice convo going.

with the usual making fun of here and there.

but he completely turns around and calls you "dumb stupid b---"

saying how i pissed him off with the dumb jokes. blahblah

(he did bother to ask me to stop or nething cuz honestly i wouldve)

im so worked up. i wanna just punch him or something. (but im not like that)

i havent been so angry with anyone in YEARS.

also i might be seeing him soon. because of something.

and i know i wont be able to face him without getting angry.

i dont know what to do. can anyone PLEASE help?

-edited-

[Guest Xiaoba1tu]

but he completely turns around and calls you "dumb stupid b---"

im so worked up. i wanna just punch him or something. (but im not like that)

i havent been so angry with anyone in YEARS.

also i might be seeing him soon. because of something.

and i know i wont be able to face him without getting angry.

i dont know what to do. can anyone PLEASE help?

But you have a reason to be angry. I would approach him about it and ask him what it was for.

If he doesn't have a good excuse, don't be his friend anymore. How can you call someone that from nowhere for no reason?

Or if you don't like conflicts, pretend it didn't happen and see how things go from there.

[Guest aiwae]

^ whaatt?? is he bipolar?

[spark]

But you have a reason to be angry. I would approach him about it and ask him what it was for.

If he doesn't have a good excuse, don't be his friend anymore. How can you call someone that from nowhere for no reason?

Or if you don't like conflicts, pretend it didn't happen and see how things go from there.

what im assuming is he was getting annoyed with me trying to be nice to him...? i dunno.

i dont like conflicts but i dont like backing down either. i dont know. =/

i feel like if i start something, it'll just get worse. but theres this whole "pride" issue too.

i dont know anyone who would just sit there and take that. (even tho in a sense i did).

i dont wanna do anything i will regret. and it seems like either way i'll regret somehow.

he did say he was pissed about the fudgin dumb jokes (im guessing the teasing).

maybe hes just not the type who likes teasing. =X he seemed okay with it and whatnot. but whatever.

i just wish he was a bit nicer with his words.

^ whaatt?? is he bipolar?

lols. i dont think he is.

sorry if im being too confusing or whatnot.

[Guest Hiya]

Question 1: What traits do girls prefer in a jerk, rather than a nice guy? I see it all too often. Girls go for the jerks. Then she cries to the nice guy about how he was a jerk. Then when the girl is ready for the nice guy, the nice guy already has a girlfriend and she cries about how all the nice guys are taken. Pisses me off.

Question 2: Why do girls insist on bottling up their thoughts, feelings and emotions? Don't they realize that it will only make the situation worse when they blow up? In addition, girls will complain to a guy about how he "doesn't understand" when she has only given him slight hints to the situation. Why is this?

[Guest marvinoppa]

If I leave the bay area in a car traveling 75 mph and "you" leave the bay area in a car going 85 mph, and we both leave at the same time and we're both driving to LA which is 400 miles away, how long after your arrival will i arrive?

[Guest Leyaya]

Question 1: What traits do girls prefer in a jerk, rather than a nice guy? I see it all too often. Girls go for the jerks. Then she cries to the nice guy about how he was a jerk. Then when the girl is ready for the nice guy, the nice guy already has a girlfriend and she cries about how all the nice guys are taken. Pisses me off.

Question 2: Why do girls insist on bottling up their thoughts, feelings and emotions? Don't they realize that it will only make the situation worse when they blow up? In addition, girls will complain to a guy about how he "doesn't understand" when she has only given him slight hints to the situation. Why is this?

Answer 1: We're gluttons for punishment. Haha actually not really. I don't really suppose there's really any specific 'traits' that attracts a girl to a jerk. They come in all shapes and sizes and they all act like a jerk in different ways. By the time we're in a relationship with one we get into this mind set where we're sure they'll change if we act a little sweeter or differently. But for whatever reason it happens to be that we're attracted to the jerk, the fact that it's harder to get him to love us makes us WANT to make him love us. Therefore we stick around and usually by the time we get out of the relationship it's too late for a lot of things.

Answer 2: Not all girls. I'm quite open about my feelings with my boyfriend. The girls that you're talking about are really just those annoying hypocritical girls who complain that their boyfriends don't understand communication, when they themselves don't bother to communicate in the relationship. And most of the time when they say that "they've tried", it really means they told him something that made zero sense and got mad because they had to repeat themselves. Honestly, half the time my girlfriends tell me a story and when I ask questions they say "Oh well I meant such and such happened before such and such, and I forgot to mention that such and such - wait no that actually happened AFTERWARDS........ OMG never mind I'll just start from the beginning"

Speak slowly, add all details and there wouldn't be any problems.

And the bottling up of feelings is probably because their boyfriends "lack communication skills".

[Guest Slug]

If I leave the bay area in a car traveling 75 mph and "you" leave the bay area in a car going 85 mph, and we both leave at the same time and we're both driving to LA which is 400 miles away, how long after your arrival will i arrive?

roughly 40 minutes after. oh wait i'm a guy.

[Guest Noncinema]

Man i got a number today. Actually i got 2. Wow im on a roll

[Guest xphant0mwing]

okay so i have a question for you ladies. lets say that youve been with a guy for about a 7 months and like.. suddenly you had to move to like 350 miles away. and like the next time you see your bf will be in 5 months or so... when winter break is. and then your bf wants to suprise you. what would be the best suprise ever. it can be mails, cards, anything. well except the bf flying there to see you . what else would really be excited to get?

[Guest shirotaka]

okay so i have a question for you ladies. lets say that youve been with a guy for about a 7 months and like.. suddenly you had to move to like 350 miles away. and like the next time you see your bf will be in 5 months or so... when winter break is. and then your bf wants to suprise you. what would be the best suprise ever. it can be mails, cards, anything. well except the bf flying there to see you . what else would really be excited to get?

As I am a guy I shouldn't answer this but I think it'd be pretty funny if you mailed yourself to her...LOL.

[Guest _ATELIER]

^...lol...clevverrrr.

a video? like record on your phone and text it to her,

so she can watch it overrrrrrrr and overrr again whenever she misses you...xD

or a real vid/ well dvd.

[Guest lilmzwhoa]

okay so i have a question for you ladies. lets say that youve been with a guy for about a 7 months and like.. suddenly you had to move to like 350 miles away. and like the next time you see your bf will be in 5 months or so... when winter break is. and then your bf wants to suprise you. what would be the best suprise ever. it can be mails, cards, anything. well except the bf flying there to see you . what else would really be excited to get?

a puppppppyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!

like, a real one.

lol.

that way it'll feel like you're there with her.

if not,

then wat ATELIER says.

orrrrrrr..you can record your voice and put it on to a brand new iPod, send it to her, and have her play it.

better yet, put the recorded video onto the iPod.

o0o, P-ornnnn. hahahaaa. :X

[Guest Xiaoba1tu]

what im assuming is he was getting annoyed with me trying to be nice to him...? i dunno.

i dont like conflicts but i dont like backing down either. i dont know. =/

i feel like if i start something, it'll just get worse. but theres this whole "pride" issue too.

i dont know anyone who would just sit there and take that. (even tho in a sense i did).

i dont wanna do anything i will regret. and it seems like either way i'll regret somehow.

he did say he was pissed about the fudgin dumb jokes (im guessing the teasing).

maybe hes just not the type who likes teasing. =X he seemed okay with it and whatnot. but whatever.

i just wish he was a bit nicer with his words.

Ok if he's annoyed at you/your jokes, I don't think he likes you because you're getting too clingy maybe?

I think it's best you sat down and ask exactly what is bothering him, if he doesn't mind.

About the teasing, I think if he liked you as a friend he wouldn't mind the teasing.

[spark]

Ok if he's annoyed at you/your jokes, I don't think he likes you because you're getting too clingy maybe?

I think it's best you sat down and ask exactly what is bothering him, if he doesn't mind.

About the teasing, I think if he liked you as a friend he wouldn't mind the teasing.

too clingy? lols ive only talked to him twice in my life.

the first time. it was like hey. whats ur name. ... goodbye.

second time. was this convo.

well i decided i'd apologize for whatever might have annoyed him.

and i will say i wont bother talking to him anymore.

blahblah. goodbye.

i honestly dont want to deal with anything right now.

since im really pissed at someone else atm.

(project partner who does absolutely nothing and then blames me)

do you think my solution is all right?

[Guest -epik]

Okay, so this girl I dated and broke up with is being a b.itch and spreading weird rumours and stuff..

I used to be friends with her before we hooked up, and I really don't like the idea of her being an enemy or anything.

How could I approach her and talk to her about it? Can't IM, we did blocked + deleted each other.

Man. This girl was weeeeeird. She is very manipulative, and a lot of my friends believed the weird things she spread. = =

[Guest eximius]

Umm... there's a thing called a phone? You could try that.

If worse comes to worse, talk to a mutual friend about it and if they're mature enough, they'll relay what you said back to the girl without twisting your words.

But if I were in your situation... I wouldn't bother. People who spread rumors are immature richard simmons bags and just want attention. If she's gonna be a richard simmons bag about it then let her be. And if my friends choose to believe her over me? That just tells me what great friends I have and whether they're worth my time or not. At most, I'll tell them "that's not what happened. THIS is what happened, if you don't want to believe me, that's your problem."

[Guest -epik]

Umm... there's a thing called a phone? You could try that.

If worse comes to worse, talk to a mutual friend about it and if they're mature enough, they'll relay what you said back to the girl without twisting your words.

But if I were in your situation... I wouldn't bother. People who spread rumors are immature richard simmons bags and just want attention. If she's gonna be a richard simmons bag about it then let her be. And if my friends choose to believe her over me? That just tells me what great friends I have and whether they're worth my time or not. At most, I'll tell them "that's not what happened. THIS is what happened, if you don't want to believe me, that's your problem."

Thanks, that's basically what I'm doing.

But it feels kinda rather infelicitous to just leave it as it is. And phoning her would be a no-no. I HATE phoning her. Ugh.

thanks though!

[Guest eximius]

Well, I guess you're either going to have to talk to mutual friends or just leave it be. :\