Ask The Ladies - Read First Post

[Guest KAITOU KID.]

First girls want someone who is in touch with his emotions, then they want someone who buries everything deep down inside.

Really, some of you should decide what you're really looking for in someone, =/.

Totally agreed.

a child's tears, are different then a grown man's tears.

only one is allowed.

single manly tear ftw.

[Guest Deadalready]

Good answers, thanks girls.

[Guest remarqable23]

I'm curious ladies, are "nice guys' really a turn off? Are you girls more attracted to aholes?

Couple months ago, I fell for my childhood friend and she told me she would never date me cause I am "too nice". Also, my ex would rather be with an ahole and treat her like crap than with someone who gives her the world.

So ladies, what's up?

[Guest 7thprincess]

I'm curious ladies, are "nice guys' really a turn off? Are you guys more attracted to aholes?

Couple months ago, I fell for my childhood friend and she told me she would never date me cause I am "too nice". Also, my ex would rather be with an ahole and treat her like crap than with someone who gives her the world.

So ladies, what's up?

(i'm kinda lost in this thread, but whatever)

for me there are different kinds of nice guys. there are nice guys who are assertive, kinda aggressive, and yet still respects women. then there are nice guys who put women on a pedestal and do EVERYTHING for her. he cannot make a decision without her input.

the nice assertive guy knows and will argue if his girl does something wrong. he puts his girl "on check."

the women on a pedestal nice guy will pretty much let his girl have her way. the girl will pretty much walk all over him, and he wont say anything about it.

your childhood friend wont date you b/c your probably her bff. you are "friend" status to her. when a girl says, "you are too nice" it means you are back to "friend" status.

your ex probably doesnt want a guy who is an bubble gum or treats her like crap, she probably wants someone who she can argue with and yet still be together.

to your first question, i actually like nice guys. i honestly dont want to waste my time on an bubble gum. nice guys are not a turn off. its more like what the nice guy is doing that is making the girl feel like he is a "friend."

[Guest underneathHERskin]

My boyfriend and I talk everynight before we go to bed. Sometimes, he'll be playing games and he'll tell me to call him. So I'll call and he won't even hear what I'm saying cause his mind is obviously on the game. I just let it be though, cause I know guys will be guys, so I tell him to keep playing, cause I don't mind as long as I can hear him. At least he's interested in me calling him right?

But last week, I called while he was playing, and I was like "You know what? Why don't I just go sleep then. We won't talk tonight..." And he said "Oh, okay. Sorry. Bye." After he hung up, I was in shock cause I can't believe he actually agreed. So I told him the next day. And then last night, it happened AGAIN! I called, and he was playing and he went on to say "Do you mind if I leave?" I got sooo mad. And he asked me "Why are you mad?"

Now, I get that he wants to play games and he needs to concentrate on it. I'll let him, I don't mind. But for him to not talk to me on the phone just to play bugs the hell out of me!!!! And he did it THREE times in one week.

My question is, do any of your boyfriends do this too? If so, would you get annoyed?

[Guest Trinity <3]

^ Yeah, my boyfriend did that a few times but I wasn't bothered by it. Once he was mad at me so I knew he wouldn't wanna talk anyways. If he was like that, I would get pretty pissed off.

Maybe you can ask him to stop playing his games for a moment and talk to you. Or tell him when you're going to call, he better not be playing his games.

[Guest IATEYOU]

I'm curious ladies, are "nice guys' really a turn off? Are you girls more attracted to aholes?

Couple months ago, I fell for my childhood friend and she told me she would never date me cause I am "too nice". Also, my ex would rather be with an ahole and treat her like crap than with someone who gives her the world.

So ladies, what's up?

Sorry to hear that. Keep your faith up, though. Some girls love nice guys, just as some guys love nice girls.

My thinking is that some girls are attracted to assholes/thug-like people/tough-cocky-son-of-a guys because they are determined to be "THE ONE" who finds that little soft spot in that guy's "deep down inside" place. Also, I suppose it can be rather thrilling to be with a "wild" kind of person. A "thug like" guy would make you feel protected and secure from the outside world since everyone would be scared to mess with the gangsta. Maybe the girl loves the feeling of "rebelliousness" that comes with dating a person that her parents would disapprove of or "opposites attract" and so she is attracted to a world she is not from. Also, maybe she likes having such a "tough" guy whipped. I dont know lol

Plus, there is always the factor of "reforming" the guy to become a relatively nice guy--with a dark past (dun dun dunn) or with MYSTERY. Some girls are into drama. They live for it, with it, create it--in reality and in their minds. Just be patient--most will eventually realize that you cannot really change anybody but yourself.

ps- Of course, not all girls are like this ^__^

[Guest songssiissii]

I'm curious ladies, are "nice guys' really a turn off? Are you girls more attracted to aholes?

Couple months ago, I fell for my childhood friend and she told me she would never date me cause I am "too nice". Also, my ex would rather be with an ahole and treat her like crap than with someone who gives her the world.

So ladies, what's up?

girls fall for assholes -- guys fall for b--itches

but..anyways...the reason why girls dont' really go for nice guys is because they can get boring.

the nice guy will always be available for the girl, he will never fight or argue with the girl, etc etc.. .. are u following?

personally i dont really care of assholes ...ive had my share

but i dated a nice guy for a year.. and let me tell u... BORING.

My boyfriend and I talk everynight before we go to bed. Sometimes, he'll be playing games and he'll tell me to call him. So I'll call and he won't even hear what I'm saying cause his mind is obviously on the game. I just let it be though, cause I know guys will be guys, so I tell him to keep playing, cause I don't mind as long as I can hear him. At least he's interested in me calling him right?

But last week, I called while he was playing, and I was like "You know what? Why don't I just go sleep then. We won't talk tonight..." And he said "Oh, okay. Sorry. Bye." After he hung up, I was in shock cause I can't believe he actually agreed. So I told him the next day. And then last night, it happened AGAIN! I called, and he was playing and he went on to say "Do you mind if I leave?" I got sooo mad. And he asked me "Why are you mad?"

Now, I get that he wants to play games and he needs to concentrate on it. I'll let him, I don't mind. But for him to not talk to me on the phone just to play bugs the hell out of me!!!! And he did it THREE times in one week.

My question is, do any of your boyfriends do this too? If so, would you get annoyed?

oyyy

my ex : im playing wow.. lemme call u back in 10 mins

me: ... ok

--3 hours later--

me:.. WTF

my ex: OMG... IM SO SORRY

.. maaaaaan efff that.

why do girls feel the need to go shopping all the time when they have a gazillon clothes in their closet when they dont even wear about 1/3 of them?

because.........................just because...

Q. Do ugly girls get married or they plan to live as a single for the rest of their lives?

Q. Why do girls have so many secrets?

Q. Why are girls meaner, when they're pretty?

Q. Why are girls materialistic?

that depends on the ugly girl-if they have a bf they probably will get married

cuz girls gossip a lot and..?

because they know theyre pretty and know they can get anything they want

because they just are.

[Guest remarqable23]

girls fall for assholes -- guys fall for b--itches

but..anyways...the reason why girls dont' really go for nice guys is because they can get boring.

the nice guy will always be available for the girl, he will never fight or argue with the girl, etc etc.. .. are u following?

personally i dont really care of assholes ...ive had my share

but i dated a nice guy for a year.. and let me tell u... BORING.

Define this nice guy you dated for a year, when I say nice guy, I'm referring to a gentlemen type of person, treating the girl with respect.

[Guest x__harlequin]

I'm curious ladies, are "nice guys' really a turn off? Are you girls more attracted to aholes?

Couple months ago, I fell for my childhood friend and she told me she would never date me cause I am "too nice". Also, my ex would rather be with an ahole and treat her like crap than with someone who gives her the world.

So ladies, what's up?

i like the nice guys (treat ladies w/ respect) but the downside is that they let us walk all over them and it's kind of boring after a while. i would prefer nice guys+sense of humour+immature, but not too immature

i dont like aholes. aholes=jerk, no respect, piece of @#&*

[Guest remarqable23]

i like the nice guys (treat ladies w/ respect) but the downside is that they let us walk all over them and it's kind of boring after a while. i would prefer nice guys+sense of humour+immature, but not too immature

i dont like aholes. aholes=jerk, no respect, piece of @#&*

That's the "nice guy" I was aiming for in my first post. I didn't mean some boring guy who doesn't know how to have fun.

[Guest Juli~<3]

I'm curious ladies, are "nice guys' really a turn off? Are you girls more attracted to aholes?

Couple months ago, I fell for my childhood friend and she told me she would never date me cause I am "too nice". Also, my ex would rather be with an ahole and treat her like crap than with someone who gives her the world.

So ladies, what's up?

my current bf is a nice guy, actually all of them have.

i think it depends on the personality of each guy, cos sure they can be classed as nice but each one of them have different personalities.

and with regards with getting bored after a while, i dont think thats always true.

maybe i'm just a boring person or maybe its cos i kinda force them into arguments to add a little spark.

in conclusion, nice guys aren't a turn off, but the odd argument or two keeps the relationship fun haha XD

-------------------------

My boyfriend and I talk everynight before we go to bed. Sometimes, he'll be playing games and he'll tell me to call him. So I'll call and he won't even hear what I'm saying cause his mind is obviously on the game. I just let it be though, cause I know guys will be guys, so I tell him to keep playing, cause I don't mind as long as I can hear him. At least he's interested in me calling him right?

But last week, I called while he was playing, and I was like "You know what? Why don't I just go sleep then. We won't talk tonight..." And he said "Oh, okay. Sorry. Bye." After he hung up, I was in shock cause I can't believe he actually agreed. So I told him the next day. And then last night, it happened AGAIN! I called, and he was playing and he went on to say "Do you mind if I leave?" I got sooo mad. And he asked me "Why are you mad?"

Now, I get that he wants to play games and he needs to concentrate on it. I'll let him, I don't mind. But for him to not talk to me on the phone just to play bugs the hell out of me!!!! And he did it THREE times in one week.

My question is, do any of your boyfriends do this too? If so, would you get annoyed?

yea my bf does it but then i'm on the computer in the meanwhile too.

so we both get annoyed at each other. so we both talked about it and decided to compromise like we'll both put our activities on hold and talk.

but i can see where you're coming from though because its just a few minutes and he could just pause the game. i think you need to get him away from the game and tell him properly cos obviously it didnt go in the first time.

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do you ever feel like your pride gets in the way of arguments sometimes?

i argue over the most petty things somethings but i just wont give in despite my bf already trying to like mend the mood kinda thing.

its like i just cant give in and say or show any affection.

its just pure hatred and revenge for whatever he did that i'm annoyed at

>_<

[Guest mz simmonz]

I'm a girl and this is a friendship type of question. I didn't feel like making my own thread since all my fellow ladies' opinions are right here anyway

Long story short, had a crush on this guy last year, he was sort of interested but not interested enough. BUT he and my friend (who at the time I considered one of my closest girl friends) clicked instantly and it was obvious he was infatuated with her. She kept insisting she didn't care about him but I felt something there. Soon after (VERY SOON..as in I still didnt get over him yet soon) they started going out. She wanted to have her cake and eat it too (keep him yet keep our friendship the same) It killed my self esteem. I distanced myself from her and in turn, a lot of our mutual friends saw her in a negative light and drifted away from her too (she hung out with her boyfriend 24/7 anyway). It's been a year since then and somehow me and her started talking and hanging out again. I'm over the guy obviously but a part of me still feels sad thinking of how she chose a guy (my crush no less) over me. But the resentment is no longer there. I realized I missed hanging out with her and out of all my girl friends, she's actually the one I have the best times with and mesh with the most. I'm not naive to think she's 100% trustworthy but I do want for us to become part of each other's lives again..slowly but it's awkward now because a good number of our core friends still feel disdain towards her and even tell me straight out that they think its extremely weird that I can even consider mending such a torn friendship with her. They think I'm being too nice and naive and that she's "crawling back" because she misses having true friends and his tired of just hanging out with her bf's friends. Gahhh I don't know what to believe..is she being a social climber? or are my friends are being too cynical? I'm not the best judge of character, I will admit that. This year has been dull and strange for me..like something was missing and I think a large part of it has to deal with our drifting apart. ladiesss (and if some gents would like to answer? haha) help!

[Guest Juli~<3]

I'm a girl and this is a friendship type of question. I didn't feel like making my own thread since all my fellow ladies' opinions are right here anyway

Long story short, had a crush on this guy last year, he was sort of interested but not interested enough. BUT he and my friend (who at the time I considered one of my closest girl friends) clicked instantly and it was obvious he was infatuated with her. She kept insisting she didn't care about him but I felt something there. Soon after (VERY SOON..as in I still didnt get over him yet soon) they started going out. She wanted to have her cake and eat it too (keep him yet keep our friendship the same) It killed my self esteem. I distanced myself from her and in turn, a lot of our mutual friends saw her in a negative light and drifted away from her too (she hung out with her boyfriend 24/7 anyway). It's been a year since then and somehow me and her started talking and hanging out again. I'm over the guy obviously but a part of me still feels sad thinking of how she chose a guy (my crush no less) over me. But the resentment is no longer there. I realized I missed hanging out with her and out of all my girl friends, she's actually the one I have the best times with and mesh with the most. I'm not naive to think she's 100% trustworthy but I do want for us to become part of each other's lives again..slowly but it's awkward now because a good number of our core friends still feel disdain towards her and even tell me straight out that they think its extremely weird that I can even consider mending such a torn friendship with her. They think I'm being too nice and naive and that she's "crawling back" because she misses having true friends and his tired of just hanging out with her bf's friends. Gahhh I don't know what to believe..is she being a social climber? or are my friends are being too cynical? I'm not the best judge of character, I will admit that. This year has been dull and strange for me..like something was missing and I think a large part of it has to deal with our drifting apart. ladiesss (and if some gents would like to answer? haha) help!

to be honest, nobody can really say shes a social climber without actually witnessing her with her bfs friends or any other friends. if she seems to be getting bored of them then there is that possibility that she's kinda running back to the past hoping everythings still the same.

if you feel that you can be friends with her then i don't see the problem in regaining that friendship. but i wouldn;t trust her totally just yet seeing as a lot of time has passed and both of you must have changed. just meet up with her for coffee or whatever and talk and try to assess her to see if shes changed for the better or for the worse and see if the friendship is worth mending.

[Guest Yashi]

My boyfriend and I talk everynight before we go to bed. Sometimes, he'll be playing games and he'll tell me to call him. So I'll call and he won't even hear what I'm saying cause his mind is obviously on the game. I just let it be though, cause I know guys will be guys, so I tell him to keep playing, cause I don't mind as long as I can hear him. At least he's interested in me calling him right?

But last week, I called while he was playing, and I was like "You know what? Why don't I just go sleep then. We won't talk tonight..." And he said "Oh, okay. Sorry. Bye." After he hung up, I was in shock cause I can't believe he actually agreed. So I told him the next day. And then last night, it happened AGAIN! I called, and he was playing and he went on to say "Do you mind if I leave?" I got sooo mad. And he asked me "Why are you mad?"

Now, I get that he wants to play games and he needs to concentrate on it. I'll let him, I don't mind. But for him to not talk to me on the phone just to play bugs the hell out of me!!!! And he did it THREE times in one week.

My question is, do any of your boyfriends do this too? If so, would you get annoyed?

YES. my ex did this to me. haha. you noticed i said "ex", right?

he did it to me a lot. and like you, i sometimes got mad at him for it. but i sucked it up, y'know? but yeah. it got annoying when he even got pissed at ME for trying to get his attention when we were hanging out at his house and he was playing his games AGAIN. i kept thinking it'd work out, but it didn't. so yeah.

i shouldn't have been so tolerant, now that i think about it.

[Guest xFloOwuffBB]

A few questions thanks ladies

~

1: What would you do if you liked a guy and he told you he'd rather be friends? Would you still try and get closer to him or would you keep your distance? Does dating in the past make any difference to your decision?

2: How often does age fit into your decisions when dating? Do you have any rules regarding who you date, like the fabled "Half guys' age + 7 years" rule?

3: Would you rather be friends with someone first then date or would you date someone then become friends if it didn't work out?

4: Normally I don't meet/flirt with girls unless I find them attractive. Now that I think about it, I'm really not giving some beautiful girls the chance to show their me personality and I'm being really shallow. Is it wrong for me to meet girls who appear to attracted to me as potential friends rather than potential girlfriends?

4b: How can I avoid giving girls the wrong idea if I talking with her while she's flirting with me?

4c: Am I likely to fall into the friend zone permanently if I take this approach?

Edit

2b: If you're attracted to someone will find out their real differs from how they look and act, change your leve of attraction completely?

~

Thanks Girls

Mm.

1. I'll just let him be. and get over him & no.

2. I don't really think about age when I'm dating someone & i don't have any rules.

2b. Huh? if the question is 'they look different from the way they look like' I would still be attracted. depends on how they act. sorry i didnt understand the question completely

3. Hmm. i'd be friends first

4. Nope.! I think if you become friends with them first. you might get to know each other more and more and perhaps become bf/gf some time later?

4b. Uhmm... be yourself? ._.

4c. You'll just have to find out i guess.

so sorry if my answers dont make any sense or dont help at all @_@

I'm curious ladies, are "nice guys' really a turn off? Are you girls more attracted to aholes?

Couple months ago, I fell for my childhood friend and she told me she would never date me cause I am "too nice". Also, my ex would rather be with an ahole and treat her like crap than with someone who gives her the world.

So ladies, what's up?

Mmm. well I dated this super duper nice guy.

He was so nice he was like. gay. but so in love with me

I'd say in between?

Y'know.. regular? o_O

I'd like a guy to be nice but also be kinda manly y'know? @_@

Not a complete a-hole.

But not so nice that he's kinda gay

[Guest KAITOU KID.]

^--- THATS RIGHT! im glad to see there are still people who know of the "MAN TEAR"

I'm glad to be part of the illustrious club!~

[Guest LUVSSOURCREAM]

girls fall for assholes -- guys fall for b--itches

but..anyways...the reason why girls dont' really go for nice guys is because they can get boring.

the nice guy will always be available for the girl, he will never fight or argue with the girl, etc etc.. .. are u following?

personally i dont really care of assholes ...ive had my share

but i dated a nice guy for a year.. and let me tell u... BORING.

NOT TRUE NOT TRUE NOT TRUE NOT TRUE NOT TRUE. I don't know how many times i have to say this. FOR ALL YOU GUYS OUT THERE READDDD THIS!!!! would it be logical to you to turn yourself in an a.ssh.ole for another girl's liking??? Do nice girls like me have to turn into a b.itch for another guy's liking?????????NO WAY. why the hell would i like guys who like bit.ches in the first place???you know those girls who like a.ssh.oles?? low self-esteem or in their teenage years, that's what. . NICE IS NOT WEAK OR BORING.

you're complaining about a 'nice guy' who will never fight or argue with the girl has no personality in the first place. being nice is a QUALITY, don't get your views distorted, guys.

and TO: 'songssissii' since your nice boyfriend is 'BORING' have you ever considered your selfish thought that YOU're also part of the relationship? and that you're boring also?? or maybe that you two just don't belong together. seesh, but don't go preaching guys to be as.sho.les to get girls and viceversa. I assume you're complaining cuz your boyfriend is always availible for you and has no opinions so rarely argues with you, and has no sense of SELF. but YOU being his girlfriend is a failure because you gave him all the blame for the failure in this relationship.

ok im done.

[Guest LUVSSOURCREAM]

I'm a girl and this is a friendship type of question. I didn't feel like making my own thread since all my fellow ladies' opinions are right here anyway

Long story short, had a crush on this guy last year, he was sort of interested but not interested enough. BUT he and my friend (who at the time I considered one of my closest girl friends) clicked instantly and it was obvious he was infatuated with her. She kept insisting she didn't care about him but I felt something there. Soon after (VERY SOON..as in I still didnt get over him yet soon) they started going out. She wanted to have her cake and eat it too (keep him yet keep our friendship the same) It killed my self esteem. I distanced myself from her and in turn, a lot of our mutual friends saw her in a negative light and drifted away from her too (she hung out with her boyfriend 24/7 anyway). It's been a year since then and somehow me and her started talking and hanging out again. I'm over the guy obviously but a part of me still feels sad thinking of how she chose a guy (my crush no less) over me. But the resentment is no longer there. I realized I missed hanging out with her and out of all my girl friends, she's actually the one I have the best times with and mesh with the most. I'm not naive to think she's 100% trustworthy but I do want for us to become part of each other's lives again..slowly but it's awkward now because a good number of our core friends still feel disdain towards her and even tell me straight out that they think its extremely weird that I can even consider mending such a torn friendship with her. They think I'm being too nice and naive and that she's "crawling back" because she misses having true friends and his tired of just hanging out with her bf's friends. Gahhh I don't know what to believe..is she being a social climber? or are my friends are being too cynical? I'm not the best judge of character, I will admit that. This year has been dull and strange for me..like something was missing and I think a large part of it has to deal with our drifting apart. ladiesss (and if some gents would like to answer? haha) help!

sorry about the double post. i don't know how to put two different quotes together in one post, if you have any idea how it'd be nice if you could pm me and tell me.

anyway, ive had that friend. we went through something like that. she was the one that took the crush away and well we didn't stop talking because of that but as we grew up our views on things drifted apart and so did we. we would talk less and less and now not at all. and i think it's best this way because i really can't stand her but i still look at her as a friend. ive moved on, we both have different lives now and no im not sad at all about it, she wasn't a good friend anyway. but i don't hate her because well all those reasons why i didn't like her all don't matter anymore. but at that time when she 'crawled back' to me, yea i took her in, and no i wasn't naive about it and didn't give her my 100%trust, but she somehow disappointed me again by the way she acts. NOTE**she doesn't necessarily have to do something to ME for me to dislike her. it's how she treats other people as well and how i KNOW all about her dirty secrets. so i cut her off, but this was LONG time ago. but anyway, you just do whatever you feel what's comfortable with you, talking to her about it really won't change much at all but just keep in mind you'll be fine without that 'friend' of yours.

[Guest remarqable23]

NOT TRUE NOT TRUE NOT TRUE NOT TRUE NOT TRUE. I don't know how many times i have to say this. FOR ALL YOU GUYS OUT THERE READDDD THIS!!!! would it be logical to you to turn yourself in an a.ssh.ole for another girl's liking??? Do nice girls like me have to turn into a b.itch for another guy's liking?????????NO WAY. why the hell would i like guys who like bit.ches in the first place???you know those girls who like a.ssh.oles?? low self-esteem or in their teenage years, that's what. . NICE IS NOT WEAK OR BORING.

you're complaining about a 'nice guy' who will never fight or argue with the girl has no personality in the first place. being nice is a QUALITY, don't get your views distorted, guys.

and TO: 'songssissii' since your nice boyfriend is 'BORING' have you ever considered your selfish thought that YOU're also part of the relationship? and that you're boring also?? or maybe that you two just don't belong together. seesh, but don't go preaching guys to be as.sho.les to get girls and viceversa. I assume you're complaining cuz your boyfriend is always availible for you and has no opinions so rarely argues with you, and has no sense of SELF. but YOU being his girlfriend is a failure because you gave him all the blame for the failure in this relationship.

ok im done.

Interesting read, thanks for your input.