Ask The Fellas

[NPB-XK]

On 5/16/2019 at 9:34 AM, Sejabin said:

Is a gay guy will sways when walking? Is there any differences if gay walk and guy walk? 

 

I live in a gay village for almost 5 years so I'll try to answer. Some gay people will be obvious in the way they talk, walk, etc... But some others talk, walk, move just like straight guys so it's hard to tell until they let you know... But then again, there are some straight guys that seem gay as hell so everything is confusing in my town. There are guys that had surgery to have boobs, butt, and everything to look like girls but they're straight and kept their shlong because they're still into girls while wanting to look like a girl. They're like incompleted straight transsexuals but they don't want to be called transsexuals (or tranny), they wanna be called straight men. Some are normal straight guys by day and drag queen by night. I have so many stories here that are gonna seem weird to you but at the end of the day, it's just better to not think too much into it... The obvious ones (like famous Youtuber James Charles) have the stereotypical way of gay people that you can spot a mile away but there are a lot of very discreet ones out there we can never spot until they say so.

[melody2016wrapz]

Please help me with this problem, it was on my mind for quite a while and I can’t put it off until I figure it out. 

 

So the story is I met a guy for the second time on a friends’s Trip. I picked him up because his house near mine and we were carpool, during the trip it seem that we are more closed. I enjoy his company and vice versa. Then a week after the trip, he texted me happy birthday and then we start to text from then on. At first we were just friend, no feelings or whatsoever. Then he start to ask me when I start school, and what school I go to. So I answered and also joked about that if he want me to stalk anybody there at my school because he was specific on the school that I goes to so I thought he was interest in a girl at the school so I was being nice to say yes I would. And then I asked him who it is and he told me that Him and I need to have food, drink and he needs to look at me in the eyes in order to tell me who.” So I reply to him that sound scary because he could just tell me and no need to do those. He told me it is not scary, and it is like going on a roller coaster. (So I got lost here when he said roller coaster, like how it is related to that ). Then I told him that I don’t like roller coaster and then he said how about when we were younger and we get balloon from a clown and we get so happy. (Then I got more confused). Then I joked around about the clown “it” and how scary was it. Then he goes on and said jokingly that he has an “it” doll in his closet that he kiss goodnight everyday. Then I told him if he does that then i’ll Give him a thumb ups, and he reply:” only a thumb ups? How about buy me dinner”. So then I was like more more confused, so I told him isn’t he suppose to buy me dinner since my reward that I will help him stalk, and he said :” bargained huh? Me like” . Then later he promise to bring me out to sushi because he didn’t make it to my birthday. (our conversation continue to be confused and joking after a month) then when he on an overseas trip my friends got very curious so they texted his closed friend and ask what he thinks of me. Then the day after my friend told me that his friend said he see me as friend. Then after that when he come back from his trip, he has to study for  board exam so our conversation start to die down as time goes. I invited him to group hangout but he doesn’t show up to any. But if I texted him to ask what he been up to he would tell me detail, even when his Father passed away he told me too. My friends think he is shady because I asked him to join us for a group hangout and he never comes. Doesn’t seem like he wants to hangout with us. 

 

So overall is this guy sound shady? Is he just joking from the beginning/ Maybe I’m just too dumb to figure out the clue or am I thinking too much. (Also he promise to bring me out to dinner couple of times but never did)

[Guest]

@melody2016wrapzOkay, okay.

 

So did you actually meet and did he tell you which girl he likes at your scholl? Because over here it really sounds like he threw hints at you like darts, but you somehow managed to masterfully dodge them with exceptional precision. He clearly meant you. He wanted to tell you in person, that the girl he likes at your school, is you. 

But somehow it sounds like you never really got the idea and he gave up. I mean he isn't going to tell any mutual friends first that he likes you, good friends wouldn't also just tell you without his knowledge. 

Basically, don't trust third opinions unless you hear it from himself face to face, guys are bad and telling third parties about their feelings. (Some aren't even good at telling their own partners).

But it seems like he still likes you, if he doesn't want to join any group hangouts, it could be due to being just busy, but it could also be because he tries to get over you and forget you, because he still likes you. 

If we want to forget a girl, we try to blend her out and avoid any contact, which never works, because the more we try to, the more we think about it. Only time helps. 

 

I honestly don't think he is shady, he seems more like a guy whose interest wasn't answered and now he tries to move on. He was looking for an opportunity to tell you his feelings, but you didn't get his hints and continued surfing on the wave of friendship, while he was trying to set sail on the (relation)ship.

 

Spoiler

(omg that pun, I'm a little proud. I hope some people see it)

 

But it could be also him just being busy due to exams, but for me it reads like he is or was into you.

[melody2016wrapz]

@Dhakra thank you so much for your input, it actually helps a lot with different perspective. No we haven’t met to talk about it, when we were about to then something always come up. I guess I really didn’t get the clues that he gave, I just thought he was just joking around. So what advise would you recommend that I should do now?

[Guest]

@melody2016wrapzHow much times has passed since this all happened? Well, at first you should try to get regular contact with him again, no need to bomb him with messages, just put yourself back on his radar and get in touch with him. Try to get him into a state where he begins to talk to you again. 

This will be significantly more difficult, if a lot of time passed already. 

[melody2016wrapz]

@Dhakrait happened couple of months ago. Sorry for the late reply it’s because I finally get to meet him up with couple of friends to play tennis today. During tennis it seem that he picks on me on a lot of things. I’m not a pro of tennis and I am still trying to learn how to play, while I was in the game and he was just waiting for his turn, instead of throwing me a ball for me to surf but he throw a bunch of them at me. And if I was on his team he would say that he doesn’t rest enough for this round. I don’t know if he being mean because I was on his team because I don’t know how to play tennis or because he just hate me in general. We both argue throughout the time we play.

[Guest]

@SejabinYou could also just ask me directly.  

 

@melody2016wrapzWell, his behavior suggests that he definitely has still some kind of interest in you. Now you just have to find out which kind it is. If guys have an interest in a girl, we tease her to get attention and make her interact with us. 

It's kinda hard for me see which way it went, was it more bantering between friends or serious argueing. Body language is also something important to take into account. 

 

If we like a girl, the first thing we do, is not showing that we like her. 

[Guest]

@SejabinBecause he/the person likes you?  And the red lips...maybe he wants to kiss you?

 

Maybe he doesn't know you.  Kidding.

[melody2016wrapz]

@Dhakra  it was more of a bantering,, how do I figure it out what kind, it hard to tell since everybody was just playing tennis.He’s a very mysterious person, up until now his message is still kind of like beating around the bush. For example if I ask what year he born, he would not tell me but instead he would ask me to tell him his birth year instead. For guys, do you guys like to do the mind game also? If you were to interest in a girl would you do beating around the bush conversation? I noticed that during the tennis game  he was introduce one his guy friend to us but when it come to introduce me to that friend, both of them start to giggling. 

[PocketPoutou]

I recently fell in love with lot of Thai BL. And mainly 2moons2

But I wonder a lot about Thai boyfriend. In 2moons2 their life looks so cool and they look so much fun to hang out with.

How are the guy in the serie versus real life? Also how to actually try to contact them to get closer? I tried send messages on instagram but they never reply. Can they date online? Are they are sweet as they look like? I am very into one of them and I would like to know him better. But idk how. I also do not live in Thailand but Europe. And it is not a fan kind of though. I am never the one going to even and screaming like crazy. I am so lost :/

[Guest]

@melody2016wrapzThat's not a question that you can answer in general. People, and so are men, are all different. Some do, some don't. I personally wouldn't do that, or at least I think I wouldn't, but if that is his way, then I guess you have to either endure it or straight tell him what's up. Someone has to make the first move.

 

@PocketPoutouSo, you fell for a guy from a variety/TV Show? I think there is nothing I can really help you with. 

[melody2016wrapz]

@Dhakra I’m not as sure if I make the move what if he wasn’t interested at all. Also when you mention that “ If we like a girl, the first thing we do, is not showing that we like her.“ how do you not show it? In what way? Isn’t risky since if the girl think  you not show any interest, wouldn’t be bad? I texted him asking a question, he answer but when I give my opinion/ statement he doesn’t text back at all, is this a red flag?

[Guest]

@melody2016wrapzAre you interested? The "if"-question will lead nowhere. It's always a risk, you can never be 100% certain. You have to decide for yourself what you want, it's not an easy step and shouldn't done lightly, but saying nothing, fearing that he doesn't reciprocate your feelings shouldn't stop you.

 

Teasing her, most likely. Try to achieve the opposite. We go into one extreme, either we always try to mock or tease you, or we totally ignore you, like you don't even exist. Every guy has his own way.  

 

 

Him not texting back is rarely a red flag, just because we don't reply asap or not at all doesn't mean we aren't interested. Maybe he is busy, doing something else or, and I know that feeling to well myself, sometimes texting is just annoying and bothersome. 

And not because of you. this isn't something personal, it doesn't mean that we don't like you, just the.....act itself, sometimes we just don't feel in the mood of texting, answering or writing a text. So we let it slip.

Just wait a day, maybe even two or three and message him again. Only if he continuesly doesn't reply, you should ask him what's going on. 

[melody2016wrapz]

@Dhakra I am interested, I guess 50/50 % chance, I just wish that I can know for sure so it could be 100%. I don’t mind being the person to make the first move. Just a question if guys know a girl like them and the girl confess but they’re not interested in that girl, can they develop their interest on that girl overtime? Or are they not going to and draw the line?

 

I heard some guy talked about texting and how they are not into it, but wouldn’t it be contradicting since guys, they want to talk to girl that they like by texting her?

 

He did reply back but my phone didn’t get the message until 2 days later ( I need a new phone for sure ) 

 

‘What a good way to approach him? Should I asked him to go get food one on one since he still owned me a dinner? Does guy prefer one on one interaction instead?

 

[Guest]

@melody2016wrapzThat's not something I can generally say, that something individual that every guy has to figure out for himself. There is no general rule of thumb. Some guys can develop it, some don't. It depends on the personality.

There will never be a 100% chance to know, you can get more certain, yes, but unless you ask him you willl never know. Just don't rush it. 

 

We usually are not big texter, I for myself delay texting messages every day. Some like it more, some don't though. If he doesn't text you message, that doesn't need to be a bad sign. I get texts from my best friends each day, but don't answer right away aswell.

Maybe he is also like me and prefers voice messages. 

 

That's good sign. 

 

 Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. You have a good reason, since he owes you and it feels like a free and easy activity. We definitely do prefer one on one interactions with girls.  Just make sure during the meeting he doesn't feel like he is in an interrogation.

[Guest]

@Sejabin Because we aren't able to see woman in pain, we are meant to protect, especially weak or loved ones. It doesn't matter for us if you are a strong person, it's in our dna to guard. Even if we do know that you can hold your ground, when we see you being vulnerable or not at full strength, our head clicks and makes us (overly) protective. 

 

Well, a good guy supports you in both situations, but different. You can't compare both ways of caring. The first one is more like being a shield, we try to guard, we try to help you recover by being someone you can lean on. We honestly don't even necessarily consider that you could handle on your own. We see you weakened and feel like we need to step in automatically. 

The other is more like supportive care, free form any health issues or pain. 

 

 

Same goes the other way around by the way. A men who show a girl is weakened side and is ready to show you being vulnerable, is someone who truly loves you. 

[anis2002]

Hye Everyone!!!!

My name is Anis and I am looking for street dancers to form a dance crew in 1/12/2019 .Open for Ampang,Selangor and Kuala Lumpur Area.The audition is so easy , you just have to send a short video of you dancing and a little bit of your introduction and your suggestion for the name of the dance group to my IG account : _anissyahirah_ 

Im looking for boys and girls no matter how old you are.I cant wait to form a Malaysia dance crew.The audition starts today...

 

My suggestion  for the name of the group is : Lost And Found dance crew

 

Feel free , Let It Be

 

[Guest]

@SejabinCharme and experience  We are used to talk us out of stuff after messing up.

[humblebee]

Why would a man tell a woman that he wants to protect her if she was not someone close to him?

[Guest]

6 hours ago, humblebee said:

Why would a man tell a woman that he wants to protect her if she was not someone close to him?

 

Because man protect women. Do we need a reason to protect someone, even if she is not close? 

In what kind of a world would we live in, if we would only protect the people we are close to with. 

 

I wouldn't read too much into it, it doesn't need to have a romantic background. 

 

@SejabinYeah, no. I can safely say that's not the reason.