Ask The Fellas

[Guest chloe_addict]

Is this normal? 
I have a good guy friend who I can speak freely to but only if it's just the 2 of us. When we're at school and we run into each other with our other friends/classmates, I feel like he's a different person because he'll be "socially polite" towards me and not as genuine as when we hang out. Instead, he'll be talking to everyone else and hardly talks to me. Why is he like that? 

[raymondc27]

strawberrykiwii said: I have this guy friend, and he's liked me since last year, maybe like January..?He confessed in december, to which I told him I only liked him as a friend. 
When school started again in January, it was a little awkward between us, and we couldn't talk properly for a few weeks or so. I thought he was taking this time to get over me.  But eventually, we were talking and hanging out like we were friends again.
The other day, me & him and a bunch of our friends went to get drinks, to which I got pretty tipsy (maybe I was drunk? i don't really know).  I overheard him tell one of my friend's that I was his "weakness" or something like that.  Also, I took his phone to call one of our friends to come b/c he was in the area apprentely, but our friend didn't pick up. So i proceeded to text him.  After going back to the message inbox, I saw another text with another friend saying how he was confused by my 'friendliness' or something like that, I honestly couldn't remember by the end of the night.When we were going home, my friend told me that not only did he pay a LARGE chunk of the bill, he also was staring at me a lot too (both of which I did not know of until we left)
Sooo...now I don't know what to do.  Especially my 'friendliness' is just how I act with all my friends... :/ I just do stupid richard simmons.Should I go talk to him about this?Or should I stay normalor should I tone my friendliness down. I don't want to lose him as a friend, I don't want it to be awkward between us either (since we have the same mutual friends in school), and I don't want to hurt him any longer

[raymondc27]

DeadSmile said: So I have started talking to this guy, guy B who i haven't seen for 2 years. I have known him for 4 years in total now but it has only been now that i have chatted to him. Four yeas ago his friend guy A told me guy B liked me. at that time i thought it was a prank cos guy B said pysh!! but I still tried to get close to him. At the time I liked his friend guy A but for some reason i kept thinking about guy B at night and started liking him a lot but when I got close he ignored me. I think they all knew I liked the other guy A so he prob thought I was playing with him.

Anyways I made a Facebook a year ago and for a year I was hesitant to add him. I finally did two days ago at like 11pm at night. after the add i was soo suprised because 6 mins later he wrote hi on my wall and i started talking to him. I was suprised cos I thought he hated me..but we started Msging one another the next day. I keep thinking about him but idk if he likes me. Every time I ask him bout the past he says let's talk about the present. He also said tht he said some unnessary things back then and told me sorry. Idk If he's being a nice friend or has feelings for me. So help? And the thing is he doesn't rly start the convo. I mean he said hi when I added him and it went from there. he also asked me about colleges and sporta but afterwards if I replied with short answers or a smiley face he would not reply and wait until I said something else. I have spent the whole day talking to him about goals beliefs etc today. do u think he's being nice and going with the flow or sincerely wants to talk to me cos if he did why wouldn't he initiate the convo and ask questsions about me?? I feel like im the talkative one but he does reply with his thoughts and a lot of long answers but I feel like I want to know about him than he of me

And the thing is... It's been two years since i have seen him. I have changed a lot and I have my hair down and I'm suprised he still recognized me when I added him. It was just a short moment of the four years that i hung out with him and I didn't rly get to talk to him when I first met him so I was suprised when I did not see the who are you on my fb page..

And the thing is I want to continue talking to him but I know tomorrow if I dun start the convo he won't and I dun want to make it seem like I'm desperate or clingy.. Help?? I'm starting to think that maybe he's just nice and so he's replying to all my responses but does not have interest towards me so he won't initiate the convo

I also think he has never had a gf before. It's just weird because for the past two years I have seen guys looking at me and trying to get close to me and calling me cute but I have never experienced the same feeling he made me feel 4 years ago. Do you think it is unrequited love? Because I always thought that if a guy likes you he would do anything to get close but he hasn't.

I have never talked to someone and revealed so much of my life before. I can't sleep so I'm thinking so much and idk what to do because I have told him I liked him 4 yrs ago and at the time they all thought I liked guy A and he didn't say anything. I'm scared if I say something now ill just get a rejection and broken friendship

[raymondc27]

nhplk19 said: I don't know what to do, I need advice please! Should I break up with my boyfriend?
He just likes to play too much. Recently he gets addicted to gambling, he promised me so many times before that after football season over, he would quit. But then this week, he start back gambling with basket ball games. He doesn't play a big amount, but still... and whenever he goes out playing with his friends ( all guys), he doesn't come home until the next morning. And he explained because he works night shift, if he goes home early, he still can't sleep, he's bored.I am recently out of town to help with my family's business, so I cannot be with him.I am very mad at him because he doesn't plan for our future or saving up money. I want to break up, but then I am too soft-hearted. We've been together 2 yrs and except for his bad habits, he is very nice to me, he never get mad at me, never yell or raise his voice at me. I can do whatever I want to. He doesn't look at any other girl. He doesn't buy me gifts though he just deposit money to our bank account. Whenever I get mad at him because of his bad habits, he told me he would quit, but he never do.Tell me, what should I do? Should I break up and wait for someone better? I work a lot and I don't go out so it's very hard for me to start another relationship, but if you tell me this situation is keeping going on for the rest of my life, I don't want to be with him.Help!!!

[raymondc27]

iwantwonbin said: how should I go about this- I met a guy through mutual friends a month ago, and he seems pretty awesome. Going to run into him soon again. I do want to try to get to know him better, but I don't know how...cos i don't want to seem weird. He's either really friendly or did take some interest at that time, but either way, i can at least make a good friend out of him if its nothing anyway, so any suggestions please.

[raymondc27]

chloe_addict said: Is this normal? 
I have a good guy friend who I can speak freely to but only if it's just the 2 of us. When we're at school and we run into each other with our other friends/classmates, I feel like he's a different person because he'll be "socially polite" towards me and not as genuine as when we hang out. Instead, he'll be talking to everyone else and hardly talks to me. Why is he like that? 

[Guest chloe_addict]

raymondc27 said:

[odaesan]

chloe_addict said: Is this normal? 
I have a good guy friend who I can speak freely to but only if it's just the 2 of us. When we're at school and we run into each other with our other friends/classmates, I feel like he's a different person because he'll be "socially polite" towards me and not as genuine as when we hang out. Instead, he'll be talking to everyone else and hardly talks to me. Why is he like that? 

[Guest chloe_addict]

odaesan said: It's called code-switching. It's more of the one that's not so linguistic. Environments trigger different actions like variation in speech.

He acts different based on social queues.

[odaesan]

The intimate one usually is the most accurate representation of a person.

[asdjasdkk]

ok so I have this LDR thing going on for the past months now, I only met him on the internet and we've been talking for how many months.. he's planning to visit me ( I'm in asia) and he's from U.S. BUT , he's expecting me to visit me HIM in U.S too when thing's go well when he'll visit me ... and I was like o_O. woah isn't guys supposed to be the ones visiting the girl and not the other way around?? =/....and I was kinda worried that when he'll visit me , we're going dutch too =/..so do you think this is worth trying for or should I just leave this kind of relationship?

[Guest dolcedor.]

asdjasdkk said: ok so I have this LDR thing going on for the past months now, I only met him on the internet and we've been talking for how many months.. he's planning to visit me ( I'm in asia) and he's from U.S. BUT , he's expecting me to visit me HIM in U.S too when thing's go well when he'll visit me ... and I was like o_O. woah isn't guys supposed to be the ones visiting the girl and not the other way around?? =/....and I was kinda worried that when he'll visit me , we're going dutch too =/..so do you think this is worth trying for or should I just leave this kind of relationship?

[raymondc27]

chloe_addict said: raymondc27 said:

[Guest dolcedor.]

chloe_addict said: raymondc27 said:

[Guest iwantwonbin]

raymondc27 said: iwantwonbin said: how should I go about this- I met a guy through mutual friends a month ago, and he seems pretty awesome. Going to run into him soon again. I do want to try to get to know him better, but I don't know how...cos i don't want to seem weird. He's either really friendly or did take some interest at that time, but either way, i can at least make a good friend out of him if its nothing anyway, so any suggestions please.

[raymondc27]

iwantwonbin said: raymondc27 said: iwantwonbin said: how should I go about this- I met a guy through mutual friends a month ago, and he seems pretty awesome. Going to run into him soon again. I do want to try to get to know him better, but I don't know how...cos i don't want to seem weird. He's either really friendly or did take some interest at that time, but either way, i can at least make a good friend out of him if its nothing anyway, so any suggestions please.

[Guest chloe_addict]

dolcedor. said:Is this the same guy who has a girlfriend but who's also emotionally close to you? If so, he might have feelings for you and doesn't want anyone to know he's unfaithful to his gf.

[Guest iwantwonbin]

raymondc27 said: iwantwonbin said: raymondc27 said: iwantwonbin said: how should I go about this- I met a guy through mutual friends a month ago, and he seems pretty awesome. Going to run into him soon again. I do want to try to get to know him better, but I don't know how...cos i don't want to seem weird. He's either really friendly or did take some interest at that time, but either way, i can at least make a good friend out of him if its nothing anyway, so any suggestions please.

[raymondc27]

iwantwonbin said: raymondc27 said: iwantwonbin said: raymondc27 said: iwantwonbin said: how should I go about this- I met a guy through mutual friends a month ago, and he seems pretty awesome. Going to run into him soon again. I do want to try to get to know him better, but I don't know how...cos i don't want to seem weird. He's either really friendly or did take some interest at that time, but either way, i can at least make a good friend out of him if its nothing anyway, so any suggestions please.

[odaesan]

dolcedor. said: chloe_addict said: raymondc27 said: