[Drama 2020] Once Again, 한번다녀왔습니다

[dramaninja]

Pretty sure they  are already missing each other already. A tragedy what they suffer though I dont think they property  talk or grieve 

 

The moms are a big poison  pill in their relationship

 

I think he told his mom off right here

 

[kiefshi1056]

 

I like next week preview now the story is getting more interesting, jealous GJ . I think Jaesuk was kickout by mom and will  stay with GJ. and the best part of the preview JaesuK and Dahee meet again, i hope they wont get drunk and ending up in a motel

 

[Marie Kay]

Am i the only one that find the way Da Hee and Yoon Jae Suk call out to each other when there drama is happening in their family so cute? 

[celebrianna]

18 hours ago, brooksmom said:

 

I didn't see much of Beautiful Life Beautiful Love, did the couple lose a child or miscarriage? It seems that the marriage breaks apart when this happens; VIP and I have a lover for example.

Spoiler

The husband was cheating with his secretary and the wife found out after he got into a serious car accident with the secretary. The husband’s mother forced the wife to divorce her comatose husband. When he woke up he found out that he was divorced and he wanted back his wife. In a messy situation like that, the husband and wife were very emotional. She was upset and felt betrayed by him and he was upset that she abandoned him. In any case, their marriage suffered tremendously from lack of communication. In the end he was able to win back his wife after walking through coals of fire.  However, the important thing I noticed about them is that they were very much affected by the divorce. It’s not like GJ and Na Hee who are so cold and somewhat indifferent to each other although they seem to have moments of sadness but that’s about it.

Gyu Jin’s conversation with Na Hee’s father confirmed what I have been saying all along. All he and Na Hee did was bicker. Like he said, they didn’t even laugh with each other or much of anything else but argue. Not once did they have a normal conversation with each other. I honestly think they’re not suited for each other. I don’t mind the writer convincing me otherwise but for now I don’t find them compatible. The doctor whom Na Hee sometimes converse with seem better able to put up with her prickly personality and I’m convinced Gyu Jin can date just about anybody because he doesn’t seem extra. 

[foreverempress]

Gyu Jin nags; that 's the very meaning of being extra! 

[celebrianna]

Even if GJ nags, it’s nothing near the level of his mother’s nagging. His mother’s nagging is what I would call “extra”. The very definition of “extra” means more than what’s considered usual for something.

[foreverempress]

n

[celebrianna]

Well then it just proves even more how much GJ and Na Hee are incompatible which is what I’ve been saying all along. Since his nagging means he consistently shows contempt for Na Hee, it’s not like this flaw in his personality will disappear.

[foreverempress]

44 minutes ago, celebrianna said:

Even if GJ nags, it’s nothing near the level of his mother’s nagging. His mother’s nagging is what I would call “extra”. The very definition of “extra” means more than what’s considered usual for something.

As a marriage and family therapist that works with couples 6 hours a day for the last 10 years, I can tell you that nagging is extra. And plenty of couples have divorced because of nagging which is also known as contempt. Nagging is more than extra, it is contemptuous ineffective communication.

This couple has to grieve their loss because these characteristics will follow them no matter how compatible their next relationship is. What they need is a good Gottman Marital Therapist to help them. Beyond that, the couple's past is not fleshed out enough to know whether they were in love or not. Both of them are stubbornly willful. What have they done to work on their marriage? Nothing! Being in love is not enough to sustain a marriage. Arguing and bickering should not end a marriage but couples use that to divorce instead of understanding what they are arguing about. GJ nor NH are not a "catch" for anyone until they learn Distress Tolerance. While there are people that are more compatible, "the one" is who you decide to be with to "death do us part, not until grief do us part" w/few exceptions. 

[celebrianna]

To me the fact that they didn’t fight for their marriage tells me that they didn’t value their marriage. I don’t care what kind of excuses they make, they just gave up without even trying to work it out. 

[foreverempress]

^^^^^^The writers should flesh out their past more^^^^^  Na Hee's brother's marriage as well.

[celebrianna]

To me Na Hee’s brother’s marriage breakdown is pretty much clear. He’s crazy for acting as a guarantor for people when both him and his wife are raising two kids. According to his ex, she forgive him several times in the past and he would still turn around and do the same thing...basically proving himself untrustworthy. She had enough and decided to get tough and divorced him.

[D27Gjk68]

14 minutes ago, celebrianna said:

To me the fact that they didn’t fight for their marriage tells me that they didn’t value their marriage. I don’t care what kind of excuses they make, they just gave up without even trying to work it out. 

 

This is where I'm most disappointed in the drama.  Right now there isn't one single character I care about so I'm not sure why to keep watching....

[foreverempress]

16 minutes ago, celebrianna said:

To me Na Hee’s brother’s marriage breakdown is pretty much clear. He’s crazy for acting as a guarantor for people when both him and his wife are raising two kids. According to his ex, she forgive him several times in the past and he would still turn around and do the same thing...basically proving himself untrustworthy. She had enough and decided to get tough and divorced him.

 I still do not see that as a valid reason to divorce. Marriage is work. She knows his weakness, but fails to see hers. She holds grudges. So far, we are only seeing a one sided-story with him owning his errors, but us not being fully privy to hers. Her daughter said some things to her that is starting to show the cracks in her own personality and worldview. 

[dramaninja]

42 minutes ago, celebrianna said:

To me the fact that they didn’t fight for their marriage tells me that they didn’t value their marriage. I don’t care what kind of excuses they make, they just gave up without even trying to work it out. 

Nothing is ever that simple especially  marriage, they suffer a tragedy that long will make or break them, people handled grief in  widely different ways. 

[brooksmom]

I can understand what these mothers are going thru. Today is mother's day here and as usual only two of my four kids remembers me. The ones with the big important jobs are no where to be found.  It's a good thing I had four. haha.

 

I took a lot of time replying to

 

On 5/9/2020 at 11:12 AM, celebrianna said:

I’m glad the divorce is out in the open. I don’t think the writer did a good job of showing that Na Hee and Gyu Jin “love” each other. When they bicker, it’s basically followed by “whatever”. They weren’t invested in their relationship. Contrarily, as much as some people didn’t like the divorced couple in Beautiful Life Beautiful Love getting back together, at least that couple seemed more “affected” by their divorce and much more emotional. So it’s a good thing NH/GJ are finally going to live separately. Maybe if they fall in love again it will be more convincing this time.

 

but then I didn't want to get into a debate so I erased it.  But now I see that @celebrianna and @foreverempress have been playing volleyball here regarding this issue.  I have to say that I agree with both posters.  But in my case, I just don't like GJ. And I don't think he's any prize either. It took a lot for NaHee to finally give up and ask for a divorce. He gave her the attitude of, No see, No hear, No say. And I don't want to have a child with you anymore because it's too stressful on me.(why not talk it out)  He resented her.  And she became angry when he resented her. When she was tired from work, he purposely didn't give her a ride home. He made sure the elevator door closed on her. He purposely didn't tell her about meetings. When she was sick in bed with a fever, he didn't even check on her to see why she hadn't gotten out of bed or showed up to work. What is going on in his mind to do these things to somebody he is suppose to love dearly. These things are beyond bickering and nagging.  People have stayed in long marriages with a nagger in the house. One just tunes it out. 

 

So, at this point in time, I wish NaHee would tell Gyu Jin to take a hike forever and not look back. But she didn't do that, instead they were cordial in their goodbyes, wished each other well, and shook hands. Bravo!  I'm not sure if I like the new doctor either. He would catch her on the rebound.

 

To each his own opinion, I still like this drama and is my weekend drama. By the look of the preview for next week, looks like NaHee is moving on and GJ is starting to look back.

Edited May 11, 2020 by brooksmom
correction

[celebrianna]

@brooksmom, I actually think both Na Hee and GJ should stay divorced. I can see traits in both that I do not like. You explained all the things to dislike about GJ and I too don’t particularly like Na Hee’s “know it all” attitude. Even at work she doesn’t know how to cooperate with others and act insensitively when interfering with the other doctor’s cases. She’s a bit much to me and her siblings pointed it out too. So, definitely both of them are responsible for the failure in their marriage and at least they seem to be admitting that much. 

[foreverempress]

Time for me to be shallow again:  just need Ga Hee's potential love interest with his shirt off every episode!

[celebrianna]

The storylines that I’m most looking forward to is Young Dal and his younger sister and Da Hee and Jae Seok. Ok Ja’s storyline is also entertaining. 

[chickfactor]

Na-Hee the "know it all" - yes, she really is too much. I like characters who are smart and practical and don't care about pleasing others. But that doesn't mean one has to be completely thoughtless. What she said to her mother at the end is just rude, and I hope she really wakes up from being so full of herself.

 

Gyu-Jin - I'm glad he admitted that his mother is overbearing and that he flat-out dislikes her sometimes. I'm glad that he told her off. It devastated her, but it needed to be said. We see so many of these screechy, selfish MIL's in K-dramas and someone usually tells them off but it's usually not their own child. Confucian filial duty and all that. Sometimes they just need to be told and Gyu-Jin being the one to tell her really hit home. I do feel bad for her because becoming a young widow must have been terrible for her, but that doesn't mean she gets to be a jerk for the rest of her life.

 

Da-Hee and Jae-Seok - so cute. I cannot wait until they start dating. I also cannot wait until both families freak out when they find out.

 

Ga-Hee - is she really going to end up with the hot delivery boy (hidden chaebol)? If so, yay for her, but I still can't picture it for some reason.

 

Anyway, Joon-Sun (the brother) will get back together with his wife and Na-Hee and Gyu-Jin will work their way back to each other - hopefully after some major growth - and Da-Hee will end up with dentist bro. The show will end with a quadruple wedding which will make the father happy because he is a cheapskate and this will save him money. The end! Just kidding, I like this show, it's the perfect dose of weekend fun.