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[Mainland Chinese Drama 2020] Find Yourself 下一站是幸福

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2 hours ago, mouse007 said:

I also noticed that FX keeps her physical interactions with Luming to a minimum and when he grabs her, she always either pulls away or expresses discomfort

When  luming was introducing her to meiling she pulled away when he tried to touch her waist

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2 hours ago, mouse007 said:

Can anyone translate what they're saying?

luming is buying a house for their future maybe. I am so excited. The big NO he is going to get

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1 hour ago, Songbae said:

luming is buying a house for their future maybe. I am so excited. The big NO he is going to get


Let us hope!!

 

so what is YS saying to FX? 

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Hello all, I am late to the camp but I really like this drama so far, it is a very realistic portrayal of choosing between love and compatibility thrown in with societal expectation, especially on women. I'm still at episode 15 (but been watching clips) because I feel anxious watching FX breaking up with YS and getting together with LM and wanted more episodes to unveil before I move on from the current lovey dovey period between the main leads. 

 

So there were many on Weibo who bashed FX for not holding on for YS, and succumbed easily to LM. But honestly, I understand her character arc though, how many of us can really stay unwavered dating a much younger man who is your subordinate and not yet considered successful while another more man who is socially accepted as a husband material pursues you relentlessly. I can completely relate to FX and feels what she is undergoing.

 

Just some thoughts:

 

1. YS and FX only wanted to show their best parts and did not actively sought to communicate and discuss how to take this forward. Both felt unsure of the relationship and that created a lot of tension and misunderstanding. FX always had a doomsday view of her relationship with YS and YS was just still too young. They will need to be more forthcoming in their relationship to really take this further. They need to be both lovers and best friends before this relationship can have a shot at being long term

 

2. I don't think her reason for getting together with LM is just to get YS to forget about her and not give up his whole life (studying abroad) to be with her. There were already problems in the relationship, both sides were not transparent, family expectations, society's comdemnation of a much older noona romance, her girlfriends advising her to try out with LM to start a relationship with marriage in sight, etc. I feel it is more of FX giving in to the pressures surrounding her and just let go of her ideals and how she wanted to live her life. She is probably thinking "oh dear, just shoot this and get on with life since that makes everyone happy (except herself)", which is a very realistic portrayal of everyday life and very relatable.

 

3. While Lu Ming was very funny with his antics and I loved his interactions with Min Min, I find myself unable to like him as a second lead. Just personally, the actor gives off this very "油腻 (perverted) and manipulative" vibe which would have kept me at bay from even being friends with him. I consider this both a blessing and a curse, it makes not liking the 2nd lead easier for me and probably lessens the dilemma for FX but if it was Wang Kai who had played this character, it would definitely be a different debate for FX and the audience in choosing between YS and LM!! :P

 

@mouse007 The preview for tonight:

 

FX: LM wanted to buy a house, so I just accompanied him to give some opinion, it has nothing to do with me at all! 

 

CX: Of course it has something to do with you. When a man brings his gf to look at houses, it is a huge hint of "I want you to be a part of my future" 

 

FX spits out coffee into YS cup

 

YS: That old fox (LM) is just digging holes for you to jump in to. You guys are just together for a few days, then he is already bringing you to see houses? He is slowly cornering you like a duck! 

 

FX: Who did you call a duck again? Even stuffing your mouth (by eating) can't stop you from talking so much 

 

YS: why are you being cross at me, if you are brave go be cross at him. 

 

FX: The problem is, I don't even know under what excuse should I be mad at him for. He just wanted my help and opinion in looking for a house

 

YS: How can you even be dating, why do you need an excuse to be angry at your boyfriend, you're just too nice. You look like you're smart, but in actual fact is just like foolish older sister who just graduated from university. 

 

At LM house:

 

Phone: How was it bringing FX to see house? 

 

LM: I don't think it was a good idea. She is very sensitive and thinks too much, I think we should take it slow. I feel like I messed up this time

 

Phone: Take it easy and stay cool

 

FX house

 

FX: Hey, knock it off!

 

CY: Don't tell me you guys are getting back together? 

 

FX: You wanna die??!!!

 

Then proceed to whacking and the family advising them to take their fight outside. I love this pair as siblings, such an accurate reflection of the love hate relationship between brothers and sisters!

 

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Thank you @nuttyz! I really appreciate you translating the preview! I checked this drama on a whim after seeing it on my Netflix recommendations but ended up really liking it. 
 

I agree, FX and YS weren’t being honest with each other and were trying so hard to put their best foot forward in fear of rocking the boat so to speak. I think they were both insecure for different reasons. FX was insecure bec of the age difference, was worried about how they were going to be perceived and felt that YS was still young and would tire of her eventually. This pressure compounded when he found out about YS planning to study abroad and then abandoning those plans bec of her. I actually understand how she feels bec I would feel the same way if I were in her shoes. Meiyin is right in that by YS deciding on his own not to go, made FX afraid that one day he’ll look back and regret the sacrifice he made for her bec his decision could derail his life. 
 

YS too was insecure because he felt that FX was ashamed of him and that he didn’t matter to her as much as she mattered to him. 
 

That’s why I think this break is healthy for both of them because it’s allowing them to get to know each other better and establish a true friendship first. They are also slowly learning to be more open with each other. 
 

I just hope FX and YS will get back together soon bec I don’t know how much more of Luming and FX I can take. 

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@mouse007,  from the preview, They r back for real, is it?  Didn't he resign from the job? I am only on ep.14.  :joy:OMG!!! They r cracking me up :joy: how YS is afraid of his hair pulling when he saw her do that to HCY. Hehe.   She spit into his cup ? 

She is more comfortable around him.  But she also takes things seriously when he acts matured with her.  I think in EP 10 when he told her to "forget it"  she misunderstood that he broke up with her.  She is so naive and inexperienced in love.                                             

 

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2 hours ago, mouse007 said:

 

I agree, FX and YS weren’t being honest with each other and were trying so hard to put their best foot forward in fear of rocking the boat so to speak. I think they were both insecure for different reasons. FX was insecure bec of the age difference, was worried about how they were going to be perceived and felt that YS was still young and would tire of her eventually. This pressure compounded when he found out about YS planning to study abroad and then abandoning those plans bec of her. I actually understand how she feels bec I would feel the same way if I were in her shoes. Meiyin is right in that by YS deciding on his own not to go, made FX afraid that one day he’ll look back and regret the sacrifice he made for her bec his decision could derail his life. 
 

YS too was insecure because he felt that FX was ashamed of him and that he didn’t matter to her as much as she mattered to him. 
 

That’s why I think this break is healthy for both of them because it’s allowing them to get to know each other better and establish a true friendship first. They are also slowly learning to be more open with each other. 
 

I just hope FX and YS will get back together soon bec I don’t know how much more of Luming and FX I can take. 

 

Very well said my Friend.:lol:

 

Everyone here already knows Lu Ming is more suitable for Fan Xing:  older, financially secure, with a well-established business.  It is just that we do not feel necessary to elaborate on it.  But, we object to the methods he uses :

 

- to manipulate Fan Xing.  To lead her on without giving a damn to her feelings.  It is so Disrespectful.  If this is what he can do when he wants a girl, I wonder what he will resort to when he does not love her anymore.  Initially I find him "funny" too.  But after some time, I get so annoyed with him

 

I do not find Yuan Song "childish".  He is more matured than Fan Xing in many ways.  Being left alone with his maternal grandparents, after his parents divorced, he has learnt to be independent.  The only Factors weighing against him are :

- His age. Being 10 years younger than Fan Xing, their relationship is not a norm

- Being younger,  he lacks experience to understand the insecurities of an older woman.  But he compensates for it with his patience, commitment, forgiving nature & a respect for her boundaries

 

Fan Xing feels insecure because she will grow older 10 years faster than Yuan Song.  When she is 60years, Yuan Song is only 50years still looking handsome.  At 22years now, Yuan Song has a great probability to have a change of heart, to yearn for a younger lover in times to come

And then of course we have the parental and societal pressures and expectations.

 

It will take a very Strong Lady to accept this kind of an "Older sister; Younger brother" relationship

 

This drama has taken a very clever Twist to the story.  Whether it is Facts or Fictions, we will always differ in our opinions.  Thus making it more stimulating to watch a drama with this Thread.  We can learn from the Drama.  We can learn from one another.

 

Ep 30 & 31 are quite dry.  There are some developments.  But otherwise quite dry. I look forward to eps 32 & 33

 

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Find Yourself is doing very well in the Prosperity Chart since Premier, it still in the Top 1

 

AI4AOfbohuHGM9W-Y8Kl5nfWDk2A8io0zdQD-n0T

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Hi everybody! So happy more people are sharing opinions. Even I am delurking ☺️.

What do you think is YS plan to get her back...being friends? How do you think they will get back together? From what I see she is not even considering her feelings, she is very closed off to both YS and LM (a man his age does not feel it?). YS got her in bed first and girlfriend after. LM is her boyfriend and can not even hold her hand. He is sabotaging himself; instead of building nice moments to be alone and get closer, he just shows off to friends, family etc. 

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7 hours ago, hush puppy said:

he compensates for it with his patience, commitment, forgiving nature & a respect for her boundaries


this is very true. Even though YS is inexperienced when it comes to the needs of older women, he is very patient and is also willing to learn and adjust. I love his relationship with Meiyin, even though she is his step mom, he respects her and listens to her. YS is also willing to recognize his faults and shortcomings and tries to be better for FX. 
 

6 hours ago, dramafana said:

Hi everybody! So happy more people are sharing opinions. Even I am delurking ☺️.

What do you think is YS plan to get her back...being friends? How do you think they will get back together? From what I see she is not even considering her feelings, she is very closed off to both YS and LM (a man his age does not feel it?). YS got her in bed first and girlfriend after. LM is her boyfriend and can not even hold her hand. He is sabotaging himself; instead of building nice moments to be alone and get closer, he just shows off to friends, family etc. 

 

In ep 29/30? When they go to that homestay for work and she sees him drawing in the courtyard and YS teases her and she responds by saying “only elementary school boys tease who they...” and YS just gives her the knowing look because FX was about to say “like”. So at this point I think FX knows that YS still likes her but she’s still holding herself back. 
 

If you recall the conversation in the stock room when FX asked YS if he would have told her about his dad had she asked and he says yes, I think that’s actually one of the problems with their relationship.  FX never asks when she should. And bec she doesn’t ask, she just ends up making assumptions to her and YS’ detriment. I wonder if there will come a point where she’ll just ask YS point blank if he still likes her. 
 

I think (and hope) that things will come to a head with Luming constantly pressuring her. I think that scene where they look at houses is the beginning of their end bec FX is increasingly becoming uncomfortable with how fast and controlling Luming is. 
 

@pad-hari I don’t know if they’ve gotten back together in that preview. It doesn’t look like it but let’s hope!!

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13 hours ago, mouse007 said:


Let us hope!!

 

so what is YS saying to FX? 

I don't know :D

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9 minutes ago, mouse007 said:


this is very true. Even though YS is inexperienced when it comes to the needs of older women, he is very patient and is also willing to learn and adjust. I love his relationship with Meiyin, even though she is his step mom, he respects her and listens to her. YS is also willing to recognize his faults and shortcomings and tries to be better for FX. 
 

 

In ep 29/30? When they go to that homestay for work and she sees him drawing in the courtyard and YS teases her and she responds by saying “only elementary school boys tease who they...” and YS just gives her the knowing look because FX was about to say “like”. So at this point I think FX knows that YS still likes her but she’s still holding herself back. 
 

If you recall the conversation in the stock room when FX asked YS if he would have told her about his dad had she asked and he says yes, I think that’s actually one of the problems with their relationship.  FX never asks when she should. And bec she doesn’t ask, she just ends up making assumptions to her and YS’ detriment. I wonder if there will come a point where she’ll just ask YS point blank if he still likes her. 
 

I think (and hope) that things will come to a head with Luming constantly pressuring her. I think that scene where they look at houses is the beginning of their end bec FX is increasingly becoming uncomfortable with how fast and controlling Luming is. 
 

@pad-hari I don’t know if they’ve gotten back together in that preview. It doesn’t look like it but let’s hope!!

I do agree. the breakup is necessary and also her dating the creepy dude is also necessary because when she ends it with the dude there will be no what ifs. The creepy dude can't say that there never dated because they did and she didn't feel anything towards him. One thing i dislike is show offs he keeps on showing her off to people  and putting words in her mouth. she needs to speak up because at this point it is exhausting. Her friend knows that the husband is cheating that is really sad because something similar happened to me. my bf cheated on me with someone that i know and my friends found out. I kind of knew about it but didn't want anyone to know but i ended it later on. IT was hard for me so i understand how she is feeling.

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@Songbae so far FX has been pressured by Luming in:

 

- he introduced her to his sister even though FX was uncomfortable. 
 

- he basically “broadcasted” to the world that she was his girlfriend right after she agreed to try dating him which led to him the treating her staff to a dinner that same evening. 

 

- he brought her to Tangtang’s bday party even though she said she didn’t want to go bec things were progressing so quickly and they had just agreed to give the relationship a try. 
 

- Luming keeps visiting FX house and parents and trying to really woo them. 
 

- From the preview, it looks like FX will feel pressured once again with the house-hunting. 

 

I am not even sure how much time has passed but it feels like all of the above happened in less than a week after she agreed to try dating him! 
 

And let’s not forget that when FX and YS were drinking together in ep 2, that she said she wanted to try just dating and wasn’t exactly keen on talking about marriage and kids right away. Imagine how she must be feeling now. 

 

I think that FX is starting to feel like her back is against the wall so I’m sure there will come a point where she’ll have enough and say something. 

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20 hours ago, usagi1997 said:

 

As much I love the actor I don't feel sorry his character has no chance. I find it funny how childish he is compared to YS. Who would you fall for? The one who always make feel you warm and who puts you at first or the big baby who needs a mom? :phew:

 

Dear Usagi1997,  May I ask, which actor are you referring to? I'm confused which is which.:blink:   At first reading, I thought you felt Yuan Song has no chance & that he is childish (eventhough you had the second sentence there. That is why I repeated my thoughts).

 

But on re-reading, I begin to understand that you meant otherwise. 

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32-33 raw out. Luming saw FX and YS both in episode 32 and 33 together and getting jealous. the preview @nuttyz posted starts FX and YS greet eachother outside and YS saying something. I think he said i heard you're getting married. the scene is really funny and leads to FX spitting out the coffee in YS cup :D . About FX and her brother fighting happens when YS is at her house. He offered to help with the dishes and they start bickering and play around. YS reaction to FX beating her brother is hillarious. Hopefully it's official by 34-35 with them getting together.

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Spoiler

From what i see in preview ep 34 she is quitting her job and YS is very upset BBC and is rejected again. How long are they gone torture us and YS??? I am getting tired...

What do you think will be the trigger for her to reconsider YS? 

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6 hours ago, dramafana said:
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From what i see in preview ep 34 she is quitting her job and YS is very upset BBC and is rejected again. How long are they gone torture us and YS??? I am getting tired...

What do you think will be the trigger for her to reconsider YS? 

what is BBC?

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8 hours ago, Lunkera said:

32-33 raw out. Luming saw FX and YS both in episode 32 and 33 together and getting jealous. the preview @nuttyz posted starts FX and YS greet eachother outside and YS saying something. I think he said i heard you're getting married. the scene is really funny and leads to FX spitting out the coffee in YS cup :D . About FX and her brother fighting happens when YS is at her house. He offered to help with the dishes and they start bickering and play around. YS reaction to FX beating her brother is hillarious. Hopefully it's official by 34-35 with them getting together.

 

That scene where they are holding coffee... YS tells FX he thought maybe she was pregnant and that’s why she ends up spitting her coffee in his cup. Then to make up for it, she takes him out for a meal where YS teases her saying that he thought maybe the baby was his :joy:

 

Luming happens to see them from afar and he’s bothered by it bec FX and YS are both laughing. 
 

It looks in tomorrow’s episode, he sees them walking and laughing together again. I’m actually glad about this bec now he knows what it feels like when someone else is having a good time with your girlfriend behind your back. 
 

I’m really liking the developing friendship between FX and YS. They’re slowly being more open and honest with each other and getting to know each other even better. I can see that this will be good for them in the future. I just hope they get back together soon bec this Luming thing is starting to drag and I just want more of YS and FX together. They’re so cute when they’re teasing each other and being all affectionate. 

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