[Drama 2018] The Third Charm, 제3의 매력

ktcjdrama · October 28, 2018

All very good and valid varying insights into the character of JY and YJ and their relationships... Gosh, even the initials of their names are the opposite of each other

I think I will hold off my comments until I watch everything. Holding off to watching until there are more episodes to marathon. I just couldn't stand waiting week by week to see what happen to them with their frustrating (at least to me) decisions. But I'm still on board to finish this unique drama.

bedifferent · October 28, 2018

On 10/22/2018 at 8:04 AM, rocat said:

SY and RW. Hmm...they feel like an old couple, advanced in their years and all too used to each other.

RW is a precocious child in an adult body, all-knowing, a bit smart-alecky and doesn't mince her words...or riddles sometimes. She's smart like her brother, but also confident and street-wise. I also like her cynicism/sarcasm. She has what I call a deep soul - she chooses who she reveals herself to, otherwise you'll see her as a bossy punk who bullies her brother.

Whereas, SY, in short, is an insecure teenager with raging hormones. Flashy, shallow and utters sweet nothings all too often without meaning them. He likes being worshipped and ditches partners callously. He seems to have it all but he really does not. I rather liked the part where he was whopped by RW and ended up in a crying mess. She seems to be the only one who can affect him like that thus far. He has some growing up to do, like his best friend.

Agree! RW's cynical outlook on love reflects her parents' relationship, where the dual female roles, in career and personal life, can be separated. She's not apologetic of her intellect and strong personality. Applaud all around when she said you don't have to be married to have children. Second brownie point also goes for RW when she admitted pure love is sacred, not the institution of marriage on paper. What I like about SY is his open mindedness. He's not tunneled vision where he values the person based on the character, not social status or financial background. He sided with Joon Young (stayed loyal and bestie throughout the years where he could have faked the relationship to his advantage for a few test points and grades) and likes RiWon for her personalities. He has decent people skills (minus the playboy raging hormones) and good morals where he's not afraid to display.

On 10/26/2018 at 3:26 PM, mouse007 said:

I think she does appreciate JY but she seems to still put her needs first.

On 10/27/2018 at 2:32 AM, triplem said:

JY lacks self worth and does not see himself the way we do. I really like him . Petty as he is and yes it can be suffocating, he is 110% devoted and is persistent in everything he does (look at how he never gave up on the radio) . Over time I have come to appreciate men like that. True they may not be as exciting and they can be naggy, but you will never feel insecure . I am certain that is one of the reasons that YJ loves him so. He makes her feel a million bucks. But as the walk along the fields have shown us , what they are both looking for right now in life is too different. Even though he is willing to make a compromise, she knows that in time to come he will be bitter about it. He in turn realises that he can't be that open , confident and cool person that he wish he could be . That is why it was eating him up ... ( I cannot help but fangirl over how SKJ is nailing the emotional scenes. This is my first time even though I have seen him in several dramas now). I think it has become such a burden on both that the best thing right now is for them to separate.

21 hours ago, mouse007 said:

To me, this drama asks questions like "what does it really mean to be compatible?", "is love enough to make a relationship work?", and "could a relationship that has the right ingredients survive even when the timing isn't perfect?"

JY and YJ, although completely different people, are compatible because they complement each other. We can see it that their differences have the potential to help each other grow and evolve.

And then there's the question of timing. I feel like at this point, the timing isn't perfect for them (just like the first time they met). YJ is still pursuing her dreams and doesn't seem ready to settle down unlike JY. I also think they still both have a lot to learn like how to communicate better and how much space to give the other person.

18 hours ago, mouse007 said:

It's nice to see JY go out into the world to find himself. This is a journey that will help him be okay with who he is and who he isn't so that he is more confident of himself. It will also help him realize what it is he really wants in life and not just planning his life around YJ.

Hello~~~ Been so busy, just watched both E9+10 back to back. Glad I did to appreciate the closure of this second chapter in their relationship, agreed as necessary and overdue. I'm totally loving the comments here @mouse007 @triplem @tali58 I just want to say you've said what I feel so beautifully

What's clearly shown here is how love can negatively prevent a person from spreading her or his wings. For Joon Young, his world is one comforting cocoon that his insecure self cannot and didn't want to leave. Young Jae came bursting onto his world as a teen and to me, he latched onto her subconsciously as his security blanket. The love that he built for them is one that he has hoped to shelter both. I think this is why he fought so hard for it is the one love he relies on to withstand everything. It's them against the world in his mind. This pure love the teen Joon Young, who became a cop, is willing to defend and protect. When it starts to break, the Joon Young, who is good at details, is confident he can find the problem to fix it as long as he persevered and not give up. As painful as it is (SJK is just heartbreakingly good), holding to the love for the sake of memories when both are walking at different speed is being selfish. I was glad to see Joon Young finally accepts that his insecurities can slow Young Jae's growth. Her career is starting to take off where opportunities will slowly divert her interest from him, whether it be time, projects, people... Ho Chul surely is just the beginning. It is not something that Young Jae can have complete control of. The heart that waver may not be for another man but for the dream and career that she wants at the moment. What I am sad for is actually Joon Young and the years that he lost while living for "them". I teared up happily while he drove away. Good for him. I have really felt for a long time that his lack of confidence has discounted his part in their relationship and most importantly, his chance to live life fully with fear and risks. As it is only with failures that he can appreciate success. I'm happy that he left into the unknown for himself, unplanned. I hope he finds new food flavors to enjoy, new joy and disappointments to experience, a new life that is less organized and a career freed from the expected. I love that he left. Period.

Young Jae.. I hope she feels less burdened by another person's love and devotion. Young Jae wants the chance to live selfishly for herself, for the career that she worked hard for. Yes, she may regret later but I like that she wants to do things on her own terms. Likewise with Soo Jae sacrificing to free his ex girlfriend so that she can move on to a better place without having to care for him. This need to survive and live on your own abilities is the confidence Young Jae wants to earn through failures. The next time they meet, they will be able to share their struggles and be stronger because they managed to overcome on their own.

9 hours ago, jbying7 said:

And YJ’s brother’s hairstyle...that “mop” on his head! I kept trying to reconcile the fact that YJ is an up-and-coming hairstylist and hair salon trainer and her brother went around with a “mop” on his head...sigh...but the show did address it slightly when YJ was cutting his bangs and wanted to fix his hairstyle and he resisted because it was part of him wanting to have some control of his life since his accident. So it was part of his healing process...? And YJ respected her brother’s wishes. And in Ep 9 when he went for the charity trip, his hairstyle was “neatened” in time for him to meet JR...hahaha

Last thought - in Ep 9, I cried at the part when YJ got bored while waiting and stepped outside for a while and JY just kept going at the radio and he was tearing...I love that scene. I see JY’s inner struggle, torn between his orderly, stickler-to-details, empathy-for-others self and yet he knew he needed to be present for YJ but he couldn’t drop what he started...

LOL, the hair., ohgod....Soo Jae's trying to mask his emotional and physical injuries in front of others through jokes and self-deprecating humor. Behind close doors, we see his struggles and pain... which to him is important to kept private as to not illicit too much burden on his loved one or pity by strangers. He insists on being independent yet doesn't shunt help by others. His hair is his way of accepting that no woman will ever find him attractive with the disability so why bother with outer appearance. Having gone through the break up, will Soo Jae accept that he is deserving of love the second time around? It's time he learns to share his life without guilt.

Soo Jae won me over in E10 when he quoted from The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Love is all about timing for everyone, y'all.

"In life, nothing can be too late or too early."

I absolutely love the radio scenes. Joon Young's insistence on fixing the radio after hearing the grandpa's comment that it's one useful thing he can do while Young Jae does her hair styling magic. It went back again to how much self worth JY has, his talent in this world pales in comparison to YJ's in his eyes. The radio channels all his hopes for their relationship. Despite how broken, can be fixed.

5 hours ago, tali58 said:

As you pointed out, and I think we all agreed on that, he built his entire world on her, and that's a heck of a burden to put on her shoulders.

He can't confidently love her like a man until he learns to be a man, love himself, figure out what he wants in life, and find himself. So the best thing, really, that she could do for him is break up with him, because he wouldn't have done it on his own. This will, hopefully, force him to grow up.

I think she knows that she'll miss him, but she's just exasperated and mentally tired of it all. She needs more, and they're not in the same place, in life or emotionally.

Yes, so agree. your post.

It pained me because I didn't know any better and I felt bad because I wasn't good enough for her.

The grateful, exciting, and loving moments.

I hope to become the tree that can withstand even the coldest gust of wind.

On cold winter days, I hope to become the sunlight.

On hot summer days, I hope to become the shade.

The age 27, that will never come back to us.

Good bye.

Spoiler

chickfactor · October 28, 2018

I don't think Young-Jae lacks commitment. The first time she broke up with Joon-Young, it really could not be helped. She was dealing with a huge and expected tragedy.

I'm glad that she had the courage to break up with him the 2nd time. She knew that it didn't feel right, so she did the hard part. The easy way out was to stay in this relationship. Joon-Young would have stayed with her forever, and would have done everything she asked. That didn't feel right for her, and good for her.

I don't think that he is all that immature or wrong for her. But for now, he is too passive. In the preview, I thought it was a conflict between her being a city-mouse and him being a country-mouse or something. But seeing the episode, the problem was when he said he doesn't care where he lives as long as he's with her. That is just too passive and he is too eager to please. He hasn't had a chance to "find himself" yet, and learn what he really wants out of life, for himself.

It's normal for most modern people to have more than one relationship in their lives. As people grow and mature, they can have multiple boy/girlfriends at different stages. For Joon-Young and Young-Jae, they are having multiple relationships, but always only with each other.

I think it's important, also, to point out how their first breakup was not through a natural course of events. Their relationship was only one-day-old when tragedy broke them up. Young-Jae had to suddenly shoulder a big burden, and Joon-Young had no idea what had happened. All he knew was that he was cruelly dumped after one day of dating a girl he really liked, and he never knew why. It's not Young-Jae's fault, but that doesn't change the fact that Joon-Young was deeply hurt, and didn't know why until 7 years later.

I don't think Ho-Chul did anything wrong. He is allowed to express his feelings and he was always respectful to both Young-Jae and Joon-Young. And it is up to Young-Jae to choose, even Joon-Young acknowledges this. And Young-Jae made her choice, which she expressed honestly and clearly. This is the most emotionally healthy love triangle that ever existed in K-Drama. Adults communicating clearly, and respecting each other's choices - the wonder!

Hurray for Soo-Jae. I loved how genuinely thrilled Joo-Ran was for him. They are really so sweet together. I will enjoy watching this happen, mostly because Soo-Jae is pure awesome.

And Joo-Ran has some great wisdom for Young-Jae, especially for someone who ~~has~~ had such a bad man-picker when it comes to her own love life.

Ri-Won and Sang-Hyun. Wow. And the Ohn parents. Amazing.

--

For fans of this drama, I really recommend Because This is My First Life if you haven't seen it already. Esom (Young-Jae) is in it, and it's one of the best K-dramas I have seen recently.

I also recommend Hogu's Love. (same PD as The 3rd Charm) The story features a strong woman and a passive man, who has a sassy sister who slays everyone around her with her smarts. Sound familiar, right? Heh. (also featuring the Ohn parents as a hilarious married couple)

thistle · October 28, 2018

2 hours ago, ktcjdrama said:

Holding off to watching until there are more episodes to marathon. I just couldn't stand waiting week by week to see what happen to them with their frustrating (at least to me) decisions. But I'm still on board to finish this unique drama.

That's me as well. I stopped after the first episode because watching the frustrations of a show like this would be more than I could bear while it is still airing. Once it is over and I know how things have gone, I will be able to watch. But only then.

It's not the first time I've waited with a drama. Just for example, I did the same with Come and Hug Me. It was such a stellar show but I could not endure the stress while it was airing and I stopped after the second episode. I absolutely loved watching once it was completed--it was just so very, very good. I feel the same about Third Charm, and I believe that the wait will be worth it.

silvermine · October 28, 2018

I love how JTBC is bringing us all these amazing dramas which tackle so many different subjects. Or make what seems like another mundane love story in the beginning into something so special.

I think I started noticing JTBC from Misty days, or maybe even before with that travel drama set in France. And then there was my favourite drama of the year - Pretty Noona. And more recently - My Id is Gang nam Beauty etc. I have liked each and every one of them. And am hooked on Third Charm now.

The last 2 episodes of The Third Charm really tugged at the heartstrings, when our vulnerable hero started realising that things were not going well, and he could do nothing to stop it.

The whole drama has been so beautifully done, especially in the development of the lead characters.

JY has the most expressive eyes, and it’s almost painful to watch him cry. And I love YJ too, you can relate so beautifully to everything she is going through.

Another brilliant drama - well done JTBC!!

mouse007 · October 28, 2018

7 hours ago, tali58 said:

Lol. Men in love don't follow perfect etiquette. He can tell she's not getting what she needs from her boyfriend, and he sees JY's immature behavior. Her Nos to him aren't fully empathic, are they? She's always happy to see him. She also relaxes around him and acts confident with him. So he's getting mixed messages from her, which allow him to hope. She's also clearly attracted to him, which I can't blame her for, he cares for her, and he's there to listen to her when she's upset, so she's either intentionally or unintentionally keeping him around her, even while saying No. Can't blame the man for hoping and for wanting to be around her. He's not doing anything underhanded, or nasty, or mean, and is a good guy.

@tali58 that's exactly it, she's giving him mixed signals so it's giving him hope. She's saying no but she's also spending a lot of time with him and confiding in him. The problem is that JY is sensitive and tends to withdraw when he's upset so it prevents YJ from opening up to him about how she really feels about things. It doesn't help that when JY is upset, he ignores her calls and stays away from her which creates opportunities for doc to step in. Doc ends up being there for her and she ends up confiding in him and spending time with him instead.

What I didn't like about doc though was the scene where he tell JY that he liked YJ and went into that drinking match with him. I also didn't like that when JY found them having dinner together on her bday, he went outside while JY and YJ were talking and said, "I'm sorry but we having finished our dinner".. To me, those 2 actions are aggressive enough to make him a little underhanded. He didn't have to do those things but he did and that makes me question his intent. Did he tell JY he likes YJ to make him feel uneasy and insecure? Was it done to pose a challenge? Did he do it to make JY realize he could lose YJ if he didn't get his game together? Also, why did he come out of the restaurant to tell JY that he hadn't finished his dinner with YJ knowing full well that JY is already misunderstanding what the dinner meant and knowing that YJ had made the reservations for JY originally? I mean, she even kept checking her phone the entire time! So yah.. those 2 things make him shady to me.

I can honestly understand where JY's insecurities are coming from and I can't blame him for misunderstanding because it's not like YJ is setting clear boundaries at this point.

mouse007 · October 28, 2018

20 hours ago, tali58 said:

Yeah, the doctor is confident, but he's earned that confidence by hard work to become a very successful surgeon. He is aware of his good-looks, for sure, and knows how to be charming, but he's got nothing to gain by lying or "playing" YJ. He's attracted to her confidence as well as her beauty, which is something she's missing from JW.

I understand that some JY fans think the doctor should "just go away," but he's not the problem at all. What he is, is a direct and sharp contrast to JY and YJ sees it. The doctor listens, responds appropriately, and he's a problem solver. He's confident, so he's comfortably upportive of YJ's successes, and actually finds her even more special as she blooms. Also, when faced with his own heartbreak, he shows his vulnerability, but he's very mature about it, and even faces it openly, as when he told YJ why he wanted a "plus 1" for the wedding.

On the other hand, JY is constantly and repeatedly sabotaging and weakening his and YJ's relationship. Even when he knows that he is, he still won't stop or change. He just mopes around, sulks, says petty things to her, questions her love and her loyalty (which, to me, is the worst because in effect he's questioning her integrity), demands unreasonable behavior from her, and acts insecure constantly. In his insecurity, he views YJ's successes as threats to their relationship. The appreciation he expresses and feels is superficial and only there until he feels threatened, which is almost immediately, since he doesn't feel worthy of her. As a result, he tries to control her blooming.

The beautiful things he does to show his love for YJ (taking her to the beach to de- stress, caring for her brother) keep her loving him. But those few manly moments get lost and almost erased by his childish behavior all the other times, like when he purposefully chose to pout and not call her for 4 days because of some imaginary wrongs that she committed only in his own mind.

@tali58 love reading your take on things! Sorry to cut your post but I just wanted to highlight some of the things you mentioned here. I agree, that the doc is a direct and sharp contrast to JY. This drama gave us doc which is supposed to make us see how he can be a better match for YJ and it gave us female cop for JY. I think that although on the surface, both doc and female cop would make more sense as a partner for YJ and JY, eventually we will be made to see why both wouldn't work. I, for one, am looking forward to seeing how this drama is going to do that. I sometimes feel like it's not fair to compare doc and JY in terms of maturity and confidence because doc has had a previous relationship (he was married before) and hence has had the opportunity to learn from that while JY is still learning and going through his first real relationship. Doc admits he had his own failings with regards to his wife and I'm sure that has had an effect on him which allows him to be more mature now. He is also confident in ways that JY isn't because doc has always been praised by his friends, he has a career that most people laud and is known to be attractive. JY, on the other hand, was a nerd and was never picked by the women on group dates. JY hasn't quite found himself yet.. he doesn't know where he fits. I'm sure this time apart will allow him to grow and come back better than ever. I hope that the third time around, we'll see a different JY who we can all see to be on par with doc.

14 hours ago, tali58 said:

I don't think she wrecked him. She just got tired of being doubted all the time and being made responsible for his happiness and dealing with his insecurities. She told him over and over that he's the only one she loves, but he kept doubting her, questioning her, constantly asking for reassurances and basically sabotaging everything. It's like dating a needy little kid. It's emotionally exhausting. So I don't blame her at all for not explaining herself anymore.

As you pointed out, and I think we all agreed on that, he built his entire world on her, and that's a heck of a burden to put on her shoulders.

He can't confidently love her like a man until he learns to be a man, love himself, figure out what he wants in life, and find himself. So the best thing, really, that she could do for him is break up with him, because he wouldn't have done it on his own. This will, hopefully, force him to grow up.

I think she knows that she'll miss him, but she's just exasperated and mentally tired of it all. She needs more, and they're not in the same place, in life or emotionally.

@tali58 I have been in a similar relationship before and I can tell you from personal experience that it really is emotionally exhausting. So I don't blame YJ for coming to this conclusion. I do think that now is not the right time for them.

dramaninja · October 28, 2018

He aint doubting her the is doubting the dude around her which he knows likes her so of course that will be a problem when he always around.So of course that will cause issues dude is not a friend after his confession that dynamic of that relationship change.

And yeah he was ALWAYS around her.Really what person will be happy about that situation?

chickfactor · October 29, 2018

I'm of the school of thought that there can always be temptation. If you are in a long-term relationship or marriage, at some point they will encounter attractive members of the opposite sex. (or same sex, if that is your persuasion)

They can't live your whole life avoiding meeting people on the chance that someone might like them. You can't lock up your partner or dress them up in a sack hoping that no one will ever be attracted to them.

If you have faith in your relationship with your partner, that should be enough. Cheating usually happens if something is fundamentally wrong with the relationship, if someone is not happy, if someone wants to leave. It's usually the symptom, not the disease of a failing relationship.

Pavla Osminskaya · October 29, 2018

Maybe we will see a baby?!? )))

misskym86 · October 29, 2018

Im still dwelling wether to watch this show or not.. since with my hectic life, im trying to avoid shows that extremely sad and depressing...

October 29, 2018

Sometimes two people can have the best of intentions can love each other deeply but just can't seem to find their way fully to each other. It's like getting so close but always missing the mark of a bullseye. Feeling as if something is off and instead of trusting their hearts they allow their lack of confidence in themselves and each other to create distance and that feeling of doubt.

Sometimes it's fear itself that robs relationships of contentment and fulfillment that was in fact always there.

AlexandraReid · October 30, 2018

bts

Pavla Osminskaya · October 31, 2018

October 31, 2018

Thanks for the video of the next phase @Pavla Osminskaya, I cannot wait for this third phase to begin ! The scenes were shot in Portugal (Lisbon ) & look gorgeous. BTS scenes. Looked like Our Joon Young is backpacking & Young Jae is successful .

After watching the last episode with sub, I was just Glad phase two was done with . It’s obvious JY loved her a lot more than she did . I have a feeling she’ll regret it . But what to do , she felt suffocated and the relationship became a burden; they were in different stations in life . But the writer will have to do a whole lot to convince me that things have changed & their fundamental differences can be reconciled.

chickfactor · October 31, 2018

2 hours ago, triplem said:

Thanks for the video of the next phase @Pavla Osminskaya, I cannot wait for this third phase to begin ! The scenes were shot in Portugal (Lisbon ) & look gorgeous. BTS scenes. Looked like Our Joon Young is backpacking & Young Jae is successful .

After watching the last episode with sub, I was just Glad phase two was done with . It’s obvious JY loved her a lot more than she did . I have a feeling she’ll regret it . But what to do , she felt suffocated and the relationship became a burden; they were in different stations in life . But the writer will have to do a whole lot to convince me that things have changed & their fundamental differences can be reconciled.

I can't wait either! Whoo!

The narration of the video says that this is his 32nd autumn and winter. So I guess their 1st meeting was their 20th spring? And the 2nd meeting with their 27th summer.

I just love it. I hug myself when I watch this.

This is the most I have ever liked Seo Kang-Joon. I never disliked him, but I think there was some controversy in the past that he was getting big roles when he didn't really deserve it. I just wrote it off as K-netizens overreacting, but I guess rumors like that do make you wonder, and it did keep me from warming up to him, maybe.

But he was super-good in "Are You Human, Too?" The show itself got boring near the end, and I don't really recommend it, but his dual-performance as a chaebol heir and a robot that looks identical to him is SO GOOD. They don't look different at all, but in every scene, you never doubt which character you're looking at. That should really put an end to any speculation about his acting skills.

And then this show. He is amazing in this show. It's a simple role, a boy in love - not some fancy high-concept sci-fi - and he is so adorable!

Love in Lisbon! See you all there this weekend!

dulcinea1 · October 31, 2018

This week it seems that instead of a preview, JTBC has posted a Behind The Scene. I suppose they don't want to show us too much. I'm so excited to discover where JY and YJ are after 5 years.

I believe maybe JY is a chef in Lisbon and YJ goes there because of her work (for a fashion show, for example) and they meet again. And a reason to JY return to Korea could be because of her sister (a new nephew/niece, a wedding...I'm a totally fan of his sister and his bestfriend ).

I can't wait for Friday and discover how the writers are going to surprise us!

bedifferent · October 31, 2018

1 hour ago, dulcinea1 said:

I believe maybe JY is a chef in Lisbon and YJ goes there because of her work (for a fashion show, for example) and they meet again. And a reason to JY return to Korea could be because of her sister (a new nephew/niece, a wedding...I'm a totally fan of his sister and his bestfriend ).

ahhaa, me too, JY should pursue what he is good at. Cooking. His travel should help him to open up to a new world with different people, beyond the small world at home. I love the color palette, gorgeous scenaries... I plan to visit Portugal next summer. Seeing Lisbon makes me want to be there sooner.

I love how carefree and stress free Joon Young looks. Good to see you back lol. Calling @Cecentre to watch next weekend

My first time watching SKJ, he is doing a wonderful job. Joon Young is an endearing character @triplem @chickfactor