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[Drama 2018] My Mister, 나의 아저씨 - Best Drama at 2019 (55th) BaekSang Arts Awards


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This scene still makes me tear up whenever I rewatch it. I hope IU, LSK and My Ajushhi team will win many deserving awards for this gem of a drama.          

Detailed analysis - Last scene   If Dong Hoon was still being the old Dong Hoon, he would just say "가 / Go on "   Before the time skip, every time DH and JA had to part ways, he al

Ep. 12 Text Preview (translated):   Dong-Hoon has an all-night conversation with Yoon-Hee, who knew everything.   He leaves early in the morning to play soccer, but during the game

  • 3 weeks later...

I saw LSK congratulating IU on Lee Hee Yeol's Sketchbook program. I'm glad @widala made a post about it because I would have had no clue how to share that clip. I was so hoping that LSK would come out to surprise IU and make a comment. I was very happy when I saw it.

 

Recently, on 'King of Mask Singer' the current king sang "Adult" in his battle to keep his position as king. The judges were in tears and the king retained the title by a score of 15-1. The song sounded so familiar and it took awhile for me to realize what song it was but soon I too was in tears remembering our dear masterpiece.

 

On a final note while watching a reality program and trying to figure out how the show came up with the ages of some of the contestants I realized that many in Korea use the Lunar Calendar to celebrate birthdays. Usually, the lunar birthday falls up to a month before the birthday using a traditional calendar. So, we might see the birthdate as June 5 but it might be celebrated sometime in May. The day will vary from year to year. I have several friends who celebrate their birthday in this fashion.

 

So, DH's son could have had a birthday sometime in the Spring/Summer before he left for the US. When JA and DH met again he could have had another birthday even before the date listed on any documents. So he could be 2 years older than when we first met him. Why am I still talking about this? It just struck me suddenly. I still want the time apart to have been as short as possible!

 

Hope all of you are doing well!

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My Mister is still a frequently discussed drama on Reddit although the moderators like to take down any new threads citing that the topics have been discussed previously. :unamused:

 

But anyway, here's a recent and rather long discussion for anyone still starved for anything My Ajusshi. :)  Read it 'coz it may not be around for long.

 

 

 

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I see "Bernie" everywhere these days but never thought he'd appear with our gang too. He actually looks kinda cute sulking at the end of the table while the four are making merry. At least Sang Ho tries to cheer him up a little. :lol:

 

 

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I started watching 'My Mister' early last year but stopped after only 10 minutes into the first episode as I thought it was just going to be a silly romance/corporate politics type story. Luckily, as I was trying to find something to watch, I saw that it was on Netflix and decided to give it another shot.  And I'm absolutely glad I did as it is one of the best dramas I have ever seen from any country, east or west.  Kudos to the entire production team, the actors and writers.   I watched it once not knowing really anything about the plot and watched it again right after, following along with the comments, posts and analysis from the Soompi forum.  I can see myself re-watching this drama every 4-5 years and getting something new from it every time. 

 

I rarely write reviews, blog posts or anything but loved this series so much, I wanted to share an epiphany I had about an aspect of the drama.  In Episode 8, which is about half way through the series, DH and JA are walking together and DH is explaining to JA the difference between an architect and a structural engineer, about how buildings need to be designed to be able to withstand external forces, and that it's the materials used that creates the internal structure to withstand those forces.  JA tells DH that he told her that her internal forces seemed strong and wanted to know what he meant by that, and he says probably because she didn't list any qualifications or expectations in her resume, and just listing running seemed stronger, like he was unconsciously agreeing with his monk friend that having and acquiring external 'stuff' wasn't everything.  This conversation is so poignant and the fact that it's happening right before everything starts crumbling around DH makes the writing a masterpiece. 

 

It parallels their exchange in the bar when they are discussing their view when knowing someone elses vulnerability, DH would choose to feign ignorance in case the other persons internal structure isn't strong enough to withstand the pressure, whereas JA sometimes feels like she would rather have it broadcast so everyone would know it.  This illustrates that DH is not truly aware of his internal forces, he believes that by controlling the external forces (image of him) that he can balance the forces.  But as his image starts to collapse around him, he clings to the one persons whose internal forces he can lean on which is JA, until he has had a chance to develop his own, which is why he needs her even though he can't admit it to others or himself.  JA herself has very strong internal forces but has shut herself off to the fact that the internal forces and external forces actually need to work together to balance themselves out.  Her walls are so strong and high that she has self-isolated herself in her own prison where her belief of herself as a bad person and a murderer is all she sees and is the only perspective of others that she allows in.  It is DH's generosity, humanity and trust that allows her to start to see that some external forces from outside can be beneficial to break through the internal structures of her self-imposed punishment.  Which is why DH's character and integrity are so important to JA, because if such a good person believes that she is a good person too, it just might be true. 

 

This is also why I found the ending of the series amazing, because it holds true to the realistic fact that as long as they really 'needed' each other to heal themselves, they wouldn't really be happy.  They both needed to independently restructure their internal/external forces so that they could handle them from a place of wholeness.  We don't truly love from a place of need, but only from an abundance of love in our own hearts.

 

I could probably write an entire blog post but I'll leave it at that.  I really love this drama so much.

Edited by SweetMochi
slight context correction
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Whew! I finally made it to the end of this thread, having started back on page 180-something a few days ago. I've read every article you guys put up on the Give Me Slippers website (and commented a couple of times) and now found this forum, too. You all are stars, hanging in there and posting all the analyses, news, and rich details you've found! I'm late to the party; I started watching My Mister on April 8 on Netflix, finished it about a week later, and have re-watched it multiple times now. It's SOOO nice to find a group of people who take MM so seriously! :) Even though it's been three years since the discussion first started, it's great to see that this thread still continues. 

 

It's 3:20am here right now so must get to bed, but will try to write more soon!

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OK, I'm awake again :).

 

I just cannot get My Mister out of my system, and over the past couple of months with watches, re-watches, going over the superb content at Give Me Slippers, and thinking through the show, there have been a lot of thoughts building up that need to come out. My husband is utterly sick of hearing about MM (even though he enjoyed watching it)...so THANK YOU in advance for listening.

 

Here goes, in no particular order.

 

Differences between Netflix and TVN:

With the Netflix version, it seems we're missing out on a couple of things. First, in Episode 11 when Dong Hoon goes to visit GD at the temple, the song playing is not "El Condor Pasa" but one of the instrumental pieces from the soundtrack. Not a big deal, but there's so much meaning in "El Condor Pasa" that I wish they'd put that in. I'm assuming it was a copyright issue.

 

Also, in Episode 14, when DH is at the movie theater after learning about JA's wiretapping, we don't get to see the movie playing on the big screen :(. I'm not familiar with "Peppermint Candy" at all, BUT it's kind of jarring and disruptive to hear terrible screaming coming from the film and not be able to see it for context, ha.

 

Park Dong Hoon - an Enneagram 9 waking up from a deep sleep

After studying the Enneagram for the past few years, I think it's fascinating how DH fits the Enneagram 9's approach to life and how we get to watch him wake up from a deep sleep over the show's run.

 

Enneagram 9s usually feel they need to suppress their needs and desires in order to maintain peace, first in their families as they're growing up, and then later in life. It's said that they try really hard to maintain peace with other people. So they are patient, perceptive of other people, and steady and stable. I think of all the Enneagram numbers, the 9s are one of the kindest and one of the most likeable.

 

However, because they also want to maintain peace internally, they'll also disconnect, disengage, and withdraw if they're feeling overwhelmed by the demands of the world in a given moment. They're also not as ambitious as others, since it can be tiring to exert themselves to achieve and climb the ladder. They're Peacemakers, so in general they avoid conflict instead of addressing it head-on or asserting themselves. So they can start "merging" with other people, putting other people's needs and wants before their own. They end up reacting to people and situations because they want to please others.

 

BUT they can also be really stubborn and when they feel like a value or principle has been violated, they can hold their ground and start fighting. (I'm married to a 9 so I've seen all this play out :).) Enneagram 9s can hold a lot of anger and this can burst out, too, especially when other people violate said deeply-held values. Expressing this anger healthily, and learning to assert themselves in healthy ways to obtain what they need and want - while staying kind and perceptive to others - is part of their self-awareness and growth track.

 

I could see all of this in Dong Hoon.

 

With his family:

- Eomma said DH rarely expressed his needs or desires as he was growing up.

- He was the steady and stable brother, the straight man to SH's colorful emotions and KH's unhinged anger. He cared about their needs; one example was when he financially helped out with Sang Hoon's daughter's wedding.

- In Episode 4, he held Ki Hoon back from going to beat up the condo villa owner in Episode 4. He didn't want KH to make a scene.

- The condo villa owner pissed him off, though, because he humiliated SH in front of their eomma. So after he mustered up some courage by pondering a while, buying cigarettes, and throwing them away, he confronted the guy in an awesome showdown.

 

At Saman E and C:

- He was kind to his staff, but they also railed that he was overlooked and didn't stand up for himself (Episode 5).

- Also at work, he had been demoted from the Design Team to the Safety Team, and though it hurt him greatly he didn't question it.

- Half of the managing directors respected him and wanted to promote him, but they also ignored his protests of not wanting to advance.

- In Episode 10, when the managing directors met with him again about the possible promotion, he said, "I didn't want to engage in conflicts and compete, so I wanted to avoid this if possible. I'm going to face it. I want to do a good job." He was ready now. This was HUGE.

- In multiple episodes, he started confronting Do Joon Young, after being resentful but passive around him. By the end, DH no longer waited for DJY to go down an elevator first, but stalked into the elevator and left DJY behind. He didn't need to maintain false peace with DJY any longer but was willing to hold him accountable to his actions with both Yoon Hee and Ji An.

- In Episode 13, during his final interview to become a director, DH engaged fully with all the questions and defended JA powerfully. He didn't care about keeping the peace with Director Yoon; he just wanted the truth to come out and wasn't willing to throw JA under the bus (which he kinda did in Episode 9 when he apologized to Team Three for "picking the wrong person").

- After the time skip, he had gotten what he needed and wanted from his professional life. He had resigned from Saman and had set up his own company with the staff he regarded so highly. He was back to doing what he loved, all aspects of structural engineering without all the politics and infighting of a big corporation. 

 

With Yoon Hee:

- This poor marriage. DH had disengaged and disconnected from YH a long time ago, partly due to her conversations about leaving the neighborhood and hating his friends. I imagine that in the beginning of their marriage, he really did want to please her and show her he loved her. However, leaving Hugye and his family would violate his sense of what family and duty meant to him, especially if his father had already passed away and his mom needed DH around. DH may have felt overwhelmed by these conflicting responsibilities (between YH and his family), but YH's constant talks with him would have shut him down.

- His anger obviously came out in Episode 11 and 12 when he punched the door and told her how the affair made him feel worthless.

 

With Ji An:

- In the early episodes, he was kind to JA, but he was always reacting to her and her demands for meals.

- However, when she tried to kiss him, this violated his vows as a married man, and he stopped her right away. He also rallied himself to confront her the next day at the office - but he was consumed with thoughts of it during his commute to work. Confronting her didn't come easily to him but he knew he had to do it.

- He conceded to his team that he had chosen the wrong person (as mentioned above) but then he was determined to find out the truth. He exerted himself and got himself to Choon-Dae's place where he learned about JA's past, and his values were so completely violated by Kwang-Il's actions toward JA that he went to confront KI.

- My heart was racing so fast when he told KI, "I'm warning you. I grew up with three brothers. We fought a lot. I was pretty darn good." (paraphrase). I'd thought passive DH was going to get beat up badly, but he was SO ready for this fight. He channeled his anger in a spectacular way.

- After this he went to Jung-Hee's bar and said, "It feels like every cell in my body was woken up from deep sleep." YESSSSS!!!

- When JA took away the slippers, he asserted himself and ran after her, demanding that she stay in his life and buy him a new pair of slippers. I don't think the old DH would've done this.

- And when JA ran away, DH tirelessly looked for her. He was completely engaged when it came to her, and exerted himself to find her, get her to the hospital, keep her out of jail, and get her to Jung Hee's bar where she would be safe. When it came to JA, DH was not a passive, disengaged man....at all. The words he said to her, too, in his veiled way of telling her how much she meant to him, were a profound expression of his heart.

- When they met after the time skip, for DH to initiate a handshake probably meant he wanted more, eh? :)

 

These are the examples I can think of for now, but of course there are many more. Over the course of the show we got to watch DH become more like his true core self, and wake up from his numbness. He is so attractive as a fully-engaged person - kind, fighting in healthy ways for those he loves, asserting himself to get his professional needs met, and expressing himself in both his hurt (for example, finally opening up to his brothers about the affair) and his care for others. But his core goodness and integrity never disappear - they just shine brighter for not being hidden anymore.

 

Sorry I can't include screencaps or GIFs; Netflix doesn't allow for them! If anyone knows how to do them from Netflix let me know.

 

I saw on Give Me Slippers that Ki Hoon is a mouthpiece for DH and I totally agree with that! I also noticed in my re-watches how Yu Ra is a mouthpiece for Ji An in uncannily precise ways. And in my re-watches I became absorbed by managing director Park Dong-Un and his role in the story. But this is getting long so...more later!

 

Edited by the_sweetroad
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I know not many are following this page anymore :(:), but I was curious if there were deleted scenes included in the DVD/ BluRay releases. Does anyone know if there were, and what they were like?

 

So during some re-watches Park Dong Un's role became increasingly noticeable and fascinating to me. @justamommany pages back said:

 

On 5/31/2018 at 5:10 AM, justamom said:

I thought Gwang Il represented the general audience, initially skeptical and mocking their relationship...but he came out of it transformed, just like us.

 

Totally agree with this! And if Kwang Il is the one who has an intimate look into DH and JA's relationship (like we do, but even more so, since he has access to all the recordings), Managing Director Park Dong Un is the one in the story who actually discovers the truth of everything that's been going on.  He has access to CCTV - he’s the only who consistently does - and he pieces together the truth for everyone in the story. He even gets his hands on DJY's phone records and passes them to DH. His access, power, and even mobility are at a level that no one else has, except perhaps the Chairman. He becomes a major playmaker in MM. Not only that, I realized after my last re-watch that PDU actually saves both DH and JA at different times: DH in the beginning of our story, and JA at the end.

 

Let me break it down:

 

Park Dong Un's Access...To Everything


Our first glimpse of PDU is in Episode 1. Through Saman's CCTV, he sees that Director Yoon is trying to woo Director Jung. He's not even using CCTV to check on a security breach or event, he's just hanging out in the Security room and checking up on his fellow directors. Because he can see Director Yoon texting Director Jung, though, he becomes concerned for Dir Jung and sends him to the US for a month to keep him out of trouble. Dang.

 

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Screencaps taken from Viki


In Episode 2, Park Dong Un is again in the Security room, trying to unravel the mystery of the bribe that was accidentally sent to Dong Hoon. Thankfully, when the bribe is "found" in the trash and brought to the Security team, PDU is there. He orders the head of the Audit team to keep the find a secret, and later reveals to a very-relieved DH that the money was found. 

 

PDU also gets to read the email tip-off and learns that they tried to bribe the Managing Director (himself), not the General Manager (DH). He’s amazing in the Directors' meeting when he reveals that he knows what was in the email tip.

 

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His quick mind pieces everything together and he figures out that even though he was the target, Dir. Yoon and DJY also want to fire DH.

 

Soon after, in Episodes 3 and 4, PDU is demoted and has to move to Busan. But he checks out the CCTV in the Shine bar and sees that something fishy is going on:

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In Episode 5, Park Dong Un becomes a major player when he hands DJY's phone records to DH. The show never explains where he got them from, but it doesn't matter. He has them and he urges DH to dig up some dirt about DJY. This leads to a complete breaking open of DH's façade of a happy marriage.

 

Much later, in Episode 13, we see him with the detective at the police station. The detective shows him CCTV from the streets around Shine bar on the night of the incident:

Spoiler

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Then in Episode 14, he's in the investigator's room at the police station when they've caught Ki Bum.

Spoiler

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As this sequence unfolds, PDU learns that JA has been wiretapping DH's phone, which shatters the façade that there's a perfectly innocent, non-spying relationship between JA and DH. Poor DH!

 

As I said, he is the only one in MM with access to CCTV and behind-the-scenes happenings whenever and wherever he needs it, and his access to all of this information helps him find out the truth.

 

Park Dong Un's Power

 

Obviously PDU's position and power (and desire) are what enable him to gain access to the Saman CCTV room all the time. But he also has the power to move people around (like sending Dir. Jung to the US for a month) and influence the decision to put DH forward as a candidate in the search for a new Managing Director.

 

PDU also saves DH in the beginning of the show by revealing the truth about the bribe scheme and enabling DH to keep his job. If it weren't for PDU's standing with the Chairman and with the rest of the Directors, DH may have been done for.

 

Then toward the end of the show, PDU has the chance to save Ji An from jail by not pressing charges, and he graciously takes it. As powerful and as disgraced as he was, PDU could easily exact extensive revenge on JA and Ki Bum and make them pay for a long time. But he yields his power and allows the two young ones to keep going with their lives.

 

Also, Park Dong Un is the only one besides Chairman Jang who almost never wears a tie. The rest of the Saman directors always wear ties, but PDU is consistently shown in an open collar and suit coat. This costuming must have been deliberate by PD-nim to reinforce PDU's powerful standing over and above the others throughout the show. Interestingly, though, the only time we do see him wear a tie is in the directors' meeting where he's revealing the truth about the bribe (above). I guess when all the directors are together, they all have to wear ties :).

 

(As an aside, DH only wears ties once he becomes a Saman director. By the end of Episode 16, though, he’s his own CEO and he moves to the open-collar look himself.)

Spoiler

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Just had to squeeze in a shot of DH smiling.

 

Park Dong Un's Mobility

 

You'd think that if you were demoted and sent to Busan that you wouldn't see your colleagues very often. But throughout the show, after PDU has gone to Busan, we still see him meeting with the Chairman, going to job sites, and meeting with DH.

 

Spoiler

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I only noticed this during a re-watch (and not during the first watch), because I was thinking about DH and JA and how it seemed like her moving to Busan was like moving to the end of the world. Why did Busan seem so far away, and their parting feel so final? Yet PDU makes the distance seem like nothing, since he's always in touch with his people and has opportunities to see them. His mobility is a stark contrast to DH and JA's mobility.

 

MM is endlessly rich and fascinating because there's so much to delve into with even supporting characters. When I first watched the show, I just thought PDU was DH's supervisor and ally. Only after seeing him, repeatedly, in some of the same situations (intently staring at CCTV screens :) ) and seeing how authoritative he was, did I realize what a key role he played in the entire story. He's kind of the bomb.

 

 

Edited by the_sweetroad
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