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Go Seung Ji

[Drama 2018] My Mister, 나의 아저씨 - Best Drama at 2019 (55th) BaekSang Arts Awards

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2 minutes ago, akhenaten said:

I wonder if it ever occurred to those who complain about the age gap that there is a purpose to that. It was never intended to pander to the sexual fantasies of middle-aged men.  It was put there because it will make Park Dong Hoon’s moral dilemma about his relationship with Ji An all the more acute and his inner conflict all the more intense. He’s a morally upright man.  I’m sure when he first started helping out Ji An, he thought he was merely being kind to a girl who was little more than a child in age as far as he’s concerned.  The last thing he probably expected was to realize that Ji An was not a child but a woman.  And that she saw him as a man.  And that he would feel such a deep connection to her that she would matter so much to him, almost beyond rhyme or reason.  That probably  drove him up the wall, so to speak.

 

Yet throughout the drama, we can see how steadfast and determined he was to keep a certain distance between them.  You will never see him take advantage of Ji An, even avoiding any physical contact, regardless if the situation calls for it. Take for example how he ran away from her after they brought her grandmother to the living facility and how he made sure to sit somewhere where she won’t have any space to sit near him.  Then when she was crying at the morgue when her grandmother died, he took care to just hold her upper arms to help her up but he still made sure to hold her away from him. And when he finally found her in that shed at the dump, she was so broken and yet he never held herto comfort her, not even a mere touch of the hand.  He just watched her as she cried. And he refused to hug her the first time she asked.  He only allowed it when he knew it would be the last time they would see each other. Even then, you could see how stiffly he held himself, indicating the level of control he was exercising then.

 

So I don’t see how some people think there’s something wrong with their age gap in this drama. Honestly. :huh:

 

Exactly. And maybe why they got IU who looks even younger than her age coz she is so small. This drama was never meant to sexualize the relationship. It instead showed how circumstances and choices can slowly build a connection between 2 persons.

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50 minutes ago, kdramafanlsk said:

Thanks @tiger457_stv! Now I get that line, it got lost due to translation for me... What's ironic is by the end of ep 9 he has gotten irrevocably involved in JA's life. He got into a fist fight with Kwang Il.

 

What needs to be pointed out is that after getting info on JA DH chose to help her and confront her tormentor. The same way that JA after learning things about DH thru the bug, chose to help him. They both could have chosen otherwise. Exactly why DH forgave JA about that bug.:)commentaries on MA that put much emphasis on that bug as a breach of confidence have to view it from DH's perspective.

@kdramafanlsk  Many soompians have commented about Engineer Dong Hoon…. that he is very constant on how he see the world and act.   He analyzes before he acts (most of the time unless he gets angry and resort to fisty-cuff).   He sees clearly what is right and what is wrong.  He empathizes with people because he can see it from their viewpoint.  that is why he forgives Ji-an so quickly after finding out about her invasion of his privacy.  he understands why she did it,  and knowing well her character, realizing that like him, she is a victim,... a victim of her desperate poverty with responsibility toward grand-mother beyond anything that he could imagine.  He also realizes that she did not intent him any harm, and is grateful for being his shadow, hearing his thoughts, his anguish, cheering for him in his torments, his distress..... a good man who listens to those he cares about.

 

@kdramafanlsk also said quoting @akhenaten:  Exactly. And maybe why they got IU who looks even younger than her age coz she is so small. This drama was never meant to sexualize the relationship. It instead showed how circumstances and choices can slowly build a connection between 2 persons.

 

This reader says:  And that is why this relationship will last...because it is built on a solid foundation.  Like concrete, the longer one let it set, the stronger it becomes.

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On 5/28/2018 at 10:35 PM, akhenaten said:

Was re-watching the clip in Episode 16 when Dong Hoon was driving Ji An back from visiting her grandmother.  She was sitting at the back of the car and watching him drive.  She was focused on how one hand lightly held the steering wheel while the other was just resting on his thigh and she commented on how he was a totally different person when he drives, which I take to mean that he’s more confident and relaxed.  It drove home to me again that her awareness of him is so acute it’s almost preternatural.  

 

As a woman. I found this scene charged with sexual tension. They are just so physically aware of each other and the way they shot the scene, the camera observing his body, was extremely intimate.

 

19 hours ago, chickfactor said:

To me, the "buy me new slippers" scene is basically a love confession. He is making it clear that he will not let her exit his life for convenience, and to him, that is huge. That's why she had that ZOMG look on her face, because she understood what it meant.

 

It's like Jae-Chul said, they are speaking in code to each other. The audience knows the code, because the writer-PD taught it to them. You can refuse to see it if you need absolute confirmation via traditional visuals (kissing, etc), and/or don't want to believe in this romance, which is fine. Everyone has that choice. But the code is there, and it's quite clear and consistent.

 

Slippers was the turning point for me as well when a light bulb went off in my head and I thought, OMG! It's a love story!

 

13 hours ago, maddymappo said:

She was protected by them The alpha dog (DH) had introduced her to the pack and so she was accepted, even grandma's funeral.

 

No to me the alpha dogs are Jae Chul and Sang Hoon! Dong Hoon is definitely a beta....

 

10 hours ago, sadiesmith said:

@ninaanin and @justamom, I am a Christian and saw no rudeness in your comments. The pastor has replied back and posted a question to you, @justamom. After you read it I dare you to show him the link to your fabulous fanfic. :lol:

 

HAHA. I just saw it. Thanks for the compliment. Can you share it instead? Don't want to sound too obsessed :ph34r:

 

BTW if you're reading my fic and left me a comment under a different name, drop me a PM! Always good to know who I'm talking to... :)


@h2ogirl loved all your thoughts and analysis in that post, carefully laid out just like an engineer, haha!You ladies and men, reading this thread is really like Film Criticism Theory 101. Everyone's comments have been so thoughtful and meticulous. I'm in awe!! 


What do you all think of setting up a My Ahjussi fan page, like the Secret Love Affair Soompi forum did after the show? I just feel like all these awesome threads and conversations should be archived!

 

http://pianoconversations.wordpress.com/

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26 minutes ago, justamom said:

HAHA. I just saw it. Thanks for the compliment. Can you share it instead? Don't want to sound too obsessed :ph34r:

 

BTW if you're reading my fic and left me a comment under a different name, drop me a PM! Always good to know who I'm talking to... :)

 

 

I would be happy to share your fic, but should I tell him that you wrote it and that's how you would see "the relationships pan out?" :D

 

Here it is again for those who missed it the first time:

https://www.blogpastor.net/2018/05/my-mistermy-ajusshi-a-reflection/

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We're approaching the two-week mark of life without DH & JA. 

 

Just wanna take a sec to say I LOVE Y'ALL. I can't possibly make it through this period without you guys. Big big shout out to @justamom @chickfactor @h2ogirl for your mad analytical skillz. Everytime I read your comments, I wanna shout: CHINGU, OMG OMG CHINGU, I FEEL THE SAME WAY! 

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29 minutes ago, akhenaten said:

I wonder if it ever occurred to those who complain about the age gap that there is a purpose to that. It was never intended to pander to the sexual fantasies of middle-aged men.  It was put there because it will make Park Dong Hoon’s moral dilemma about his relationship with Ji An all the more acute and his inner conflict all the more intense. He’s a morally upright man.  I’m sure when he first started helping out Ji An, he thought he was merely being kind to a girl who was little more than a child in age as far as he’s concerned.  The last thing he probably expected was to realize that Ji An was not a child but a woman.  And that she saw him as a man.  And that he would feel such a deep connection to her that she would matter so much to him, almost beyond rhyme or reason.  That probably  drove him up the wall, so to speak.

 

Yet throughout the drama, we can see how steadfast and determined he was to keep a certain distance between them.  You will never see him take advantage of Ji An, even avoiding any physical contact, regardless if the situation calls for it. Take for example how he ran away from her after they brought her grandmother to the living facility and how he made sure to sit somewhere where she won’t have any space to sit near him.  Then when she was crying at the morgue when her grandmother died, he took care to just hold her upper arms to help her up but he still made sure to hold her away from him. And when he finally found her in that shed at the dump, she was so broken and yet he never held herto comfort her, not even a mere touch of the hand.  He just watched her as she cried. And he refused to hug her the first time she asked.  He only allowed it when he knew it would be the last time they would see each other. Even then, you could see how stiffly he held himself, indicating the level of control he was exercising then.

 

So I don’t see how some people think there’s something wrong with their age gap in this drama. Honestly. :huh:

EXACTLY!! I feel like thats all Ive been saying. I just really agree with a lot of the different insights everyone has provided. DH has really held himself and stood by it, until the time where theyve had to part. Also a reason why I was so looking forward to this drama when I first heard about it. The plot sounded good and different, I wanted to see how they were going to make it work. 

Thats why it was also annoying when theyve decided to address controversies. I feel like that really has a chance to ruin the flow of a story. I remember My Introverted Boss, about two episodes in, there were people complaining about the lead female’s character. I liked the story but it just makes you wonder how it couldve gone had people not decided to complain about it otherwise. Their opinions, critics, really altered the story telling. Like, why not wait for the plot to develop first. 

 

 

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@chickfactor agreed with everything you said there especially re: Ji Seok being a plot device. I believe Yeon Hee's sister is in the US as well. That's how I believe their future pans out (and it's in my fic too, haha): Dong Hoon hangs around a bit, pretends to be a goose father to his friends with his wife and son in the US (it's supposed to be cool for upper class Korean males), then Ji An walks back to his life and BAM! Game over.

 

“When you had an affair with that guy, you passed a death sentence on me.” --> how on earth would any man be able to reconcile with his wife after experiencing this??? Pastor is this man Christ??

 

6 hours ago, kappy said:

"Adult man and a young woman"

Me:  How about "adult man and adult woman"?  She's younger, it is true, but she's also an adult already.

 

I checked with my Korean tutor and "grown man and young woman" is probably a better translation. The word in Hanja is 即成年 for those of you who read Chinese.

 

6 hours ago, kappy said:

- "...many pitiful situations...but DH treats only Ji An with too much deep empathy and his behavior (towards her) is excessive.  

Me:  Too much empathy?  Well, the more pitiable the situation, the more empathy it deserves, I think.  And what exactly was this "excessive behavior"?

 

 

I think her point was more there are many things to find pitiful/sympathise with in this show, but Dong Hoon's reactions towards Ji An go way beyond pity (like we all have been saying for pages and pages)

 

6 hours ago, ccl82 said:

She's a championlah. 

 

Yah lor :lol:

 

39 minutes ago, akhenaten said:

I wonder if it ever occurred to those who complain about the age gap that there is a purpose to that. It was never intended to pander to the sexual fantasies of middle-aged men.  It was put there because it will make Park Dong Hoon’s moral dilemma about his relationship with Ji An all the more acute and his inner conflict all the more intense. He’s a morally upright man.  I’m sure when he first started helping out Ji An, he thought he was merely being kind to a girl who was little more than a child in age as far as he’s concerned.  The last thing he probably expected was to realize that Ji An was not a child but a woman.  And that she saw him as a man.  And that he would feel such a deep connection to her that she would matter so much to him, almost beyond rhyme or reason.  That probably  drove him up the wall, so to speak.

 

THISS! YESS!!! I am just triple highlighting it because it's so important and that's why the age gap criticism falls flat.

 

Dong Hoon, the more you run, the more obvious you get....

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20 minutes ago, sadiesmith said:

I would be happy to share your fic, but should I tell him that you wrote it and that's how you would see "the relationships pan out?"

 

Here it is again for those who missed it the first time:

https://www.blogpastor.net/2018/05/my-mistermy-ajusshi-a-reflection/

 

Nope :ph34r: Singapore is a small enough place (where your schoolmate's brother is your husband's soccer buddy and that sort of thing) and I'm trying not to leave too many online traces of my personal life though oh god what have I been saying here in the past two months :ph34r:

 

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2 hours ago, akhenaten said:

Personally, I never saw Yoon Hee as the “perfect criminal” wife that no one can sympathize with, because I honestly felt for her even if I don’t agree with what she did.  She’s not evil, but she was weak and selfish, an intelligent woman who made a huge mistake.  But I understood how lonely and neglected she must have felt in her marriage.

 

 


 

Quote

 

 When she told Dong Hoon about the times when she would ask him where he was and he would say he’s eating with his family, i.e. mother and brothers, I believe she was right to feel hurt because as his wife, she should have been part of that family.


 

 

 

Nobody stopped her to join him when he went to eat with his family, or to go t Jung-Hee's. DH must have known how she felt about going, about her distaste, hence why he stopped bring this to discussion. Slowly, he no longer told her about those things, which is not his fault. If she was the first to refuse or started treating those with hostility, that's her own fault. I'm pretty sure Yun-Hee was the first one to slowly detach herself from her in-laws and from the neighborhood. If she became passive and expected DH to take responsibility for her OWN detachment, that's her own fault. DH is not responsable for her own feelings, she is. If there is anything she felt was not viable, she should have brought it up and discuss it. Instead, she let rot more and more. I don't think it's fair make DH guilty for YH being a coward and ignorant woman.

Quote


 For example, Yoon Hee as the wife was expected to be less successful than her husband.

 

 

I never heard his mother complain about her job, but her attitude. The fact that she seemed so arrogant and never seemed to motivate DH, but not for her own ego, but for what he needed. At least to me, it looked like the mother was rather upset that YH was not so open to her husband as DH was to her, that DH was focused more on her than he should have been on himself.

Even when she left, the mother did not talk bad not so much about why she left, but the fact that it looked like YH abandoned DH when he needed his wife's support the most. Pretty sure the mother sensed the decay in her son, and she expected YH to give DH what her son gave his wife all these years.

Not trying to deny that Park mamma is not acting cold towards her daughter-in-law, but I don't think she ever dismissed people who have success. Look at YR or JH, they are both successful, yet they are humble, and the mother does treat them well. Maybe it's the fact that they are humble and do not expect her sons to be more that they are. The mother's attitude towards YR changed only when she asked too much from KH, when she tried to force him out of his way when he was not yet prepared to make the first step.

 

Quote

 She was expected to integrate herself into his family but there didn’t seem to be the same expectations with him.  At least, I’m basing this solely on what the drama had depicted about Yoon Hee and her marriage to Dong Hoon.

 

When you marry, you are expected to do certain things. C'mon, this is happening with modern couples too - when you enter a family, certain obligations arise. I'm not saying that DH is not a momma's boy sometimes and that he might be too attached to his family, but if what you wrote was right, then these would not be happening:

 

1. DH and YH would be living with his family, not in their own apartment.

2. Their son would not be living overseas, but studying nearby.

 

These are two major moves DH did for the sake of his wife, which in korean cultures are for some families unimaginable. And it's not like momma Park would not seriously object her grandson to be sent overseas. The fact that it happened, shows DH made some sacrifices too - he has to see his son via phone, just to comply to his wife's wish. Even more, he ALLOWS him to remain in the states, although he would WANT him to return. Talk about expectations, really now !

 

Quote


I’m not exactly sure why this author seemed to think that Park Dong Hoon was being shown as a perfect man.

 

 

To me he seemed an average man, nothing special.

 

Quote

And what’s this about the age gap again being an issue?  I thought we were against double standards here. 

 

Ironically, viewers have nothing against historical dramas, where a 15 yrs old bride marries a king in his 50s, or maybe even older. Or when noble men deflower Kisaengs that barely grew off their puberty.

But that's tradition...

 

 

 

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34 minutes ago, akhenaten said:

The last thing he probably expected was to realize that Ji An was not a child but a woman.  And that she saw him as a man.  And that he would feel such a deep connection to her that she would matter so much to him, almost beyond rhyme or reason.  That probably  drove him up the wall, so to speak.

wow thank you so much for this, couldn't have said any more perfectly!

 

Also thanks to @chickfactor for translating the article and then your insight. I agree with you on it 100%. And I'd like to rant a little myself, because it kind of gave me a new perspective and more things that I pondered over. For a second there, the article and the points emphasized caught me off guard, making me think: "wait a minute, how come I didn't see all these things and it didn't bother me?" but soon enough I realized that the author exaggerated and overdramatized her article (I'll just refer to the author as a she), aimlessly blaming the drama for things it didn't actually contain. I'll just break my arguments into few parts, here it goes: 

 

1. The article author looks down on DH and JA's relationship and their feelings for each other. To perceive their relationship as an attempt of the drama writer to encourage old men in pursuing young girls is just a shallow way of thinking. DH has never shown interest toward JA in a dishonest way. In fact, he is drawn to JA in a very subconscious way. She is in no way first pitiful or young girl that has crossed paths with DH. What we have here is a classic example of soulmates. Platonic or romantic, DH and JA are soulmates, attracted and drawn together without no conscious reason. I fail to understand how the blog writer can see DH's comment about JA not wearing socks as something sexual. All I see is an innocent surprise at how someone could walk around dressed so coldly in the middle of the winter. It was never DH's intention to fall for JA, it just happened. He is instinctively interested in her, like how he chose JA's CV just by the word running. There are no physical and earthly desires. DH and JA's souls are drawn to each other. 

 

2. Sexism and Patriarchy. Again, the article author is unnecessarily reading in between the lines, seeing things that aren’t actually there. Makes me think that she wrote this review as a poor attempt at being a social justice warrior, hmph. I’ll just focus on SH’s teasing and how the journalist emphasizes it as an example of double standards. It seems to me that the blogger doesn’t have a sibling and has now idea about how sibling dynamics work. Siblings tease each other about everything and everyone and 99% of those jokes are harmless and unserious in nature. SH would never even assume that DH whose middle name is “moral”  could actually fall for young girl like JA while married and with a child. All SH wanted was to amuse himself and have fun, cue to his comment after DH coldly dismisses the teasing. As for the brothers being mad about YH's affair, their reaction is completely realistic. What kind of a sibling wouldn't be mad after hearing such news? The reaction would be 100% the same if DH was a woman and had sisters/brothers, it's just a natural response and has nothing to do with gender, hence with double standards as well. 

Contrary to the blogger, I don’t see any Patriarchal undertones in the drama. Where is it? Where did she see it? Does she see it in DH who has no problem with his wife being a successful lawyer, who never questions YH’s loyalty and does all the house chores? Again, she points out things that doesn’t exist in drama.

 

3. Collectivism. Here as well we have a dramatized speech about how DH is depended on his family and squad. Well, excuse the man for trying to look after his old mother and supporting brothers. All I saw was genuine and honest human relations, what’s bad in having people on whom you can depend and just spend a good time? Absolutely nothing. Life is hard as it is.  I come from an individualistic society where a place of a family, i.e. siblings and parents is very important. I respect DH for being such a devoted son and brother. Married doesn’t mean that your only family is your significant other and children, that’s just bull**it. How do you go on not caring about people with whom you grew up and raised you? The criticizing is absolutely unnecessary and lacks any substantial evidence.

 

I guess, that’s everything I wanted to say about the article. For the second part of my post I’ll touch YH’s affair and the marriage. In no way can I justify her infidelity, she herself admitted that there were 1000 reasons to why she cheated but none of them were real. As some of you pointed out, YH is a very clever woman. All along, she knew well enough what she was doing. Indeed, she didn’t go and cheat on DH impulsively. It was a fully conscious decision. What I blame her in is how well she knows DH but chooses to stand aside and never tries to understand him, his intentions, never supports his decisions or pushes him to do better. YH decides to stand aside and watch DH wallow in self-pity, blaming everything on him. Granted, their marriage is a grey matter. YH isn’t the only suspect in their dysfunctional family, but she might as well attempted to somehow extend her helping her husband, I’m sure DH would gladly accept her support. But she remained cold and decided that she had nothing to do with his husband inner problems and let him separate his immediate family and wife. I have said many times and will say again, that it’s clear as a day that DH and YH never really functioned well as a husband and wife, what we saw in the drama is a result of years of falling apart. DH’s mom always worried about him. Why? Because he was never actually happy.

 

Oh geez I wrote so much, all the ideas just keep coming and I itch to write them and share it here.

 

BTW here’s another beautiful  oneshot, I’ve shared her work before as well, she’s very talented and just pictures JA and DH’s dynamics so well, show her some love http://eatalottransferstudent.tumblr.com/post/174353221842/youre-trembling-park-dong-hoon-had-said-as

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I know a lot of people will disagree with me, but I really dislike YunHee's character for having her happiness depending too much on the others., which rises the further question - why didn't she have any friends of her own, to spend time with? Even if she disliked her husband's, why didn't she have some people to share her time with. This makes her actually hypocritical - she judges the entourage of DH, yet she has none. Ok, it would be different if she actually had some friends, better than those who DH spends time with. But she doesn't, she just criticizes what she is not able to get. She blames others for what she lack the determination  to do, for her refusal to get out of her comfort zone. No matter how dull or passive DH became over the years, he actually, takes responsibility for his decisions and does not blame others for whatever happens to him, even if it's slow and in a passive way.

 

Also, what I disagree with other people - DH is in no way a selfless man, on he contrary, he is also very selfish. In order to maintain a connection with someone, he gives, but not freely - he must also feel that he receives back what he gives. That's why he hates DY, because he knows he never gets back from his what he wants.  He did not start to help Ji-An, not until she was the first one to help, to prove that the efforts he would invest in their connection would give him the feedback he expects.

He can't detach himself from materialism and become like his friend, linked to nothing on this world, because he knows he already gave too much to do that. Ironically, that's the source of his suffering  - not receiving back the amount he gives, which hurts his pride and ego.He feels worthless because he can't determine others to return like he gives, hence why he would rather die than to admit his wife won't give him the same amount he thinks he has given all this years. He would rather hold onto her than to let her go for someone that his pride doesn't consider worth.

Yet, this selfishness, masked under a humble attitude, is what makes him more interesting, my opinion. The fact that he learns that he is selfish and his wife is too, that all people are. I believe that's the reason why trusted and got closer to Ji-An: he recognized, unconsciously, in her, the attitude and the thoughts he tried to repress in himself. Once he learns he is selfish and there is not wrong with that, he is able to free himself of all the burdens.

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1 hour ago, ccl82 said:

We're approaching the two-week mark of life without DH & JA. 

 

Just wanna take a sec to say I LOVE Y'ALL. I can't possibly make it through this period without you guys. Big big shout out to @justamom @chickfactor @h2ogirl for your mad analytical skillz. Everytime I read your comments, I wanna shout: CHINGU, OMG OMG CHINGU, I FEEL THE SAME WAY! 

 

I am just going to second what @ccl82 said above and add @akhenaten, @kdramafanlsk, @tiger457_stv, @anipanch,

and many more that I can't list.  Many times I wanted to write something but before I could even finish gathering my thoughts someone already posted what I wanted to say and in a much better way.  You're all keeping me alive.  THANK YOU!!

 

 

 

 

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Still no pictures with IU, but here are a few of Lee Sun Kyun and some cast/crew members:

 

Shooting sites have become some kind of attraction?

 

Off Topic: Too bad we did not get to see something sweet like this from LSK's character:

Spoiler

 

 

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5 hours ago, anipanch said:

1. The article author looks down on DH and JA's relationship and their feelings for each other. To perceive their relationship as an attempt of the drama writer to encourage old men in pursuing young girls is just a shallow way of thinking. DH has never shown interest toward JA in a dishonest way. In fact, he is drawn to JA in a very subconscious way. She is in no way first pitiful or young girl that has crossed paths with DH. What we have here is a classic example of soulmates. Platonic or romantic, DH and JA are soulmates, attracted and drawn together without no conscious reason. I fail to understand how the blog writer can see DH's comment about JA not wearing socks as something sexual. All I see is an innocent surprise at how someone could walk around dressed so coldly in the middle of the winter. It was never DH's intention to fall for JA, it just happened. He is instinctively interested in her, like how he chose JA's CV just by the word running. There are no physical and earthly desires. DH and JA's souls are drawn to each other. 

 

Annyeong~! Love your post, as always. And I love y'all shippers X 1000000. #shippersunite  

 

Here's the reference to the "sexy" comment. The article writer wasn't being fair to DH, because it wasn't DH who thought it to be sexy. He was actually concerned about the being cold part.

ZqxIEVz.jpg

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5 minutes ago, h2ogirl said:

 

Annyeong~! Love your post, as always. And I love y'all shippers X 1000000. #shippersunite  

 

Here's the reference to the "sexy" comment. The article writer wasn't being fair to DH, because it wasn't DH who thought it to sexy. He was actually concerned about the being cold part.

 

You're right, it was completely misrepresented.  But that is the problem with so many people who found it hard to reconcile issues like this one.  They thought the drama is "glorifying" something when it's exactly the opposite.  The show is subverting tropes and misplaced expectations left and right.  You know those early preconceptions: old man's fantasy, dating violence, idea that DH is a perfect man, etc.  But it is too bad some people are still very conflicted.

 

A question, was this drama streamed legally in China?  If not, how did the Chinese watch it at the same time?

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1 hour ago, justamom said:

 

I checked with my Korean tutor and "grown man and young woman" is probably a better translation. The word in Hanja is 即成年 for those of you who read Chinese.

 

 

 

I think her point was more there are many things to find pitiful/sympathise with in this show, but Dong Hoon's reactions towards Ji An go way beyond pity (like we all have been saying for pages and pages)

 

 

Thanks for the clarification.  Stuff gets lost in translation, yes (though I, in no way, am saying I don't wholeheartedly appreciate and venerate the translator).  For the first comment, I guess my feelings against others' hang-up about the age disparity can't help but resurface every time I see this point brought up.

 

Re: the second, I understand a bit better her point.  It just seemed almost funny to see it worded as it is:  too much empathy and excessive behavior.  Would he have acted the way he did if it were someone else with the exact same crud going on in her life?  Someone less pretty, perhaps?  Maybe, maybe not.  Probably not?  The bond between DH and JA is undeniable, and as much I'd like to believe that he wouldn't have done the same for anyone else, I can't.  Though flawed, he's more than a decent man, and because of what was going on with her, he couldn't stand idly by.  I know it seems I'm simplifying their relationship and that it was much more than that.  

 

Hmm, I think I'm digressing.  Am I?  I'm thinking too deeply.  No, not deep enough.  lol!  See what this drama has done to us?

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1 hour ago, kappy said:

Re: the second, I understand a bit better her point.  It just seemed almost funny to see it worded as it is:  too much empathy and excessive behavior.  Would he have acted the way he did if it were someone else with the exact same crud going on in her life?  Someone less pretty, perhaps?  Maybe, maybe not.  Probably not?  The bond between DH and JA is undeniable, and as much I'd like to believe that he wouldn't have done the same for anyone else, I can't.  Though flawed, he's more than a decent man, and because of what was going on with her, he couldn't stand idly by.  I know it seems I'm simplifying their relationship and that it was much more than that

2

I for one feel like he wouldn't lol. I don't know if you believe in soulmates, telepathy and stuff but there are reasons we get attracted to some people, and then to some we don't. IMO dong hoon felt something when he first saw her, either be it her resume or the first time he saw her on the train while going back home. So it's an otherworldly, predestined connection. Something that was just meant to be. Probably universe was planning to bring them together lol. Either he would have chosen her or the other way around. 

 

1 hour ago, sadiesmith said:

You're right, it was completely misrepresented.  But that is the problem with so many people who found it hard to reconcile issues like this one.  They thought the drama is "glorifying" something when it's exactly the opposite.  The show is subverting tropes and misplaced expectations left and right.  You know those early preconceptions: old man's fantasy, dating violence, idea that DH is a perfect man, etc.  But it is too bad some people are still very conflicted.

 

Sadly these preconceptions are so severe that I think some people never even looked past half of the first episode and made comments like how IU is a beyond average actress, how an idol like her shouldn't be getting these roles and etc. I saw some comments like these on koala's website and the mind boggles. I wonder whether these people are simply hating on the actors or if they're just jealous that their favorites aren't getting these meaty roles. But anyway, I feel like most of the people who are so extreme with their reviews have their very biased observations about how marriages should work. Some on DB were even trying to stress that DH should work on their marriage even if Yoon Hee cheated and how DH is responsible for Yoon Hee cheating, his neglect and all. 

Similarly, this article's writer like some have said above is projecting her own vision of how marriages should be and relationships should be in this write-up and sadly generalizing about every 40 year old men. As if older men shouldn't have any shot at love, even if they are divorced or single lol. Not every 40 yr old man is perverted or has twisted mentality of having a young wife, [perversion doesn't start at a certain age I suppose lol]. so this common prejudice [which came almost on every site after the drama was announced] is quite tiresome. They are regarding these type of relationships already in a negative light, which makes me think that these people have been nurturing some really twisted mentality in their head. Not every age gap relationships have to be like that of Lolita, so it's sad that we tend to imagine the worse picture instead of thinking something beautiful, pure, positive. Anyway sorry for the long rant again haha.

@justamom I would love it if there was some my ahjussi fan page. I would be more comfortable with moving to someplace new since the drama is already over lol. 

Edited by Jillia
Please do not post consecutively, edit your previous post instead. Thanks! :)
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43 minutes ago, nearsea said:

Sadly these preconceptions are so severe that I think some people never even looked past half of the first episode and made comments like how IU is a beyond average actress, how an idol like her shouldn't be getting these roles and etc. I saw some comments like these on koala's website and the mind boggles. I wonder whether these people are simply hating on the actors or if they're just jealous that their favorites aren't getting these meaty roles. But anyway, I feel like most of the people who are so extreme with their reviews have their very biased observations about how marriages should work. Some on DB were even trying to stress that DH should work on their marriage even if Yoon Hee cheated and how DH is responsible for Yoon Hee cheating, his neglect and all. 

Similarly, this article's writer like some have said above is projecting her own vision of how marriages should be and relationships should be in this write-up and sadly generalizing about every 40 year old men. As if older men shouldn't have any shot at love, even if they are divorced or single lol. Not every 40 yr old man is perverted or has twisted mentality of having a young wife, [perversion doesn't start at a certain age I suppose lol]. so this common prejudice [which came almost on every site after the drama was announced] is quite tiresome. They are regarding these type of relationships already in a negative light, which makes me think that these people have been nurturing some really twisted mentality in their head. Not every age gap relationships have to be like that of Lolita, so it's sad that we tend to imagine the worse picture instead of thinking something beautiful, pure, positive. Anyway sorry for the long rant again haha.

@justamom I would love it if there was some my ahjussi fan page. I would be more comfortable with moving to someplace new since the drama is already over lol. 

 

After the initial doubt expressed everywhere this drama was first announced, it pleases me to no end that My Ajusshi ended up topping charts everywhere.  What a way to turn everything upside down.  Not only did the story go in direction nobody predicted, this surprising turn of events is itself a sweet revenge for its actors too: for IU to shut down criticism due to her idol image and "Lolita scandal", and for LSK who was the target of very nasty comments just because he was" old and ugly."  

 

But please don't move to a different place.  I like this catch-all space for all things My Ajusshi.

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