Anyone here that moved out of their parent's place still have to follow their rules?

[Crunchyrunchy]

I know someone that doesn't live with her parents anymore but she still have to follow some of their rules. Like no boyfriend and what not. I was surprised she is still her parent's richard simmons even though she doesn't live with them anymore..

[raymondc27]

Isnt the point of living out is to ignore those rules?

[CamelKnight]

Depends on your age. If you went to school somewhere way off but you're still a minor, I'd understand the parents.

If you're an adult, living on your own and, very important, providing for yourself then you should definately tell your parents to mind their own business. You're a grown up, so own up.

[Crunchyrunchy]

7 hours ago, CamelKnight said:

Depends on your age. If you went to school somewhere way off but you're still a minor, I'd understand the parents.

If you're an adult, living on your own and, very important, providing for yourself then you should definately tell your parents to mind their own business. You're a grown up, so own up.

 

What do you mean went to school somewhere way off? Like a boarding school?

[CamelKnight]

18 hours ago, Crunchyrunchy said:

Like a boarding school?

For instance yes. Or a school that's like 50 miles off since you live in the jungle or something and going back and forth would take you hours a day. Otherwise, I wouldn't have a single clue why you would let your parents still control you when you've moved out.

Well, like I said, unless they paid for it and are financially supporting you. In that case, they just expanded their home to "your" home.  

[xstarBURST]

My boyfriend moved out. His mom and his dad split, and his mom became homeless and out of pity he took her in.

He's listening to HER rules when it's HIS place. He's 29 .... listening to his mom.. in his own home

[Guest knockblock]

6 hours ago, xstarBURST said:

He's listening to HER rules when it's HIS place. He's 29 .... listening to his mom.. in his own home

 

In his own home.....

A mother making the rules in her son's home.

[CamelKnight]

7 hours ago, xstarBURST said:

He's listening to HER rules when it's HIS place. He's 29 .... listening to his mom.. in his own home

Old habits die hard. He could set up boundaries or rules but she only needs to say "I'm still your mom!" and he's going to be quiet. What else is he going to do? Kick her out? It's an unfortunate situation and I do pitty the guy, but he's between a rock and a hard place and neither are comfortable.

At least he knows his mom is taken care of and I think that's what means most to him.

[NaughtyDog]

15 hours ago, xstarBURST said:

My boyfriend moved out. His mom and his dad split, and his mom became homeless and out of pity he took her in.

He's listening to HER rules when it's HIS place. He's 29 .... listening to his mom.. in his own home

His mom became homeless and he took her in out of pity? Are those your words or his? Because I'd like to think that most people would take in their parents in a heartbeat if they were in this situation.

I think you should try to be patient and sympathize a bit more with his situation. Yes he's 29, yes he's moved out, yes she's trying to control him, but she's his mother. She's the one that supported him throughout his whole life and now she needs to depend on her son during her time of need. Does it suck? Yes, but family is family and I think he's doing the right thing by taking her in and sucking it up for now. Like CamelKnight said, old habits die hard. Give her some slack for a while and support your boyfriend as much as you can.

[Guest severus]

 

On April 27, 2016 at 7:11 PM, xstarBURST said:

My boyfriend moved out. His mom and his dad split, and his mom became homeless and out of pity he took her in.

He's listening to HER rules when it's HIS place. He's 29 .... listening to his mom.. in his own home

 

On April 27, 2016 at 10:23 AM, NaughtyDog said:

His mom became homeless and he took her in out of pity? Are those your words or his? Because I'd like to think that most people would take in their parents in a heartbeat if they were in this situation.

I think you should try to be patient and sympathize a bit more with his situation. Yes he's 29, yes he's moved out, yes she's trying to control him, but she's his mother. She's the one that supported him throughout his whole life and now she needs to depend on her son during her time of need. Does it suck? Yes, but family is family and I think he's doing the right thing by taking her in and sucking it up for now. Like CamelKnight said, old habits die hard. Give her some slack for a while and support your boyfriend as much as you can.

 

I would be extremely wary of someone who doesn't at least do that for their mother... out of compassion, and not "pity" like its some good deed you do for an unfortunate stranger. 

------

OP, it's just on the individual to interpret a parent's so called rules... what can they really do except nag? 

[xstarBURST]

On 4/27/2016 at 9:23 AM, NaughtyDog said:

His mom became homeless and he took her in out of pity? Are those your words or his? Because I'd like to think that most people would take in their parents in a heartbeat if they were in this situation.

I think you should try to be patient and sympathize a bit more with his situation. Yes he's 29, yes he's moved out, yes she's trying to control him, but she's his mother. She's the one that supported him throughout his whole life and now she needs to depend on her son during her time of need. Does it suck? Yes, but family is family and I think he's doing the right thing by taking her in and sucking it up for now. Like CamelKnight said, old habits die hard. Give her some slack for a while and support your boyfriend as much as you can.

His words.

He suggested that she stays with him until she can find a rental unit,never happened.

[prettya]

It would be nice if xstarBURST's boy friend could post here.  Maybe the mom should be more humble as she obviously did not make some good decisions in life?   And maybe the bf should be more confident; he should know that not having boundaries in life doesn't mean you're a good person.

[CamelKnight]

20 hours ago, prettya said:

It would be nice if xstarBURST's boy friend could post here.  Maybe the mom should be more humble as she obviously did not make some good decisions in life?   And maybe the bf should be more confident; he should know that not having boundaries in life doesn't mean you're a good person.

Mom should be thankfull and I bet she is. However, she's most likely always been like this and it hasn't occured to her that the way she's treating her son right now isn't the best way to show her appreciation for his actions. She's just being mom. In her opinion, nothing changed since the olden days. Mom still takes care of her son, eventhough it's the other way around at the moment.

Smartest thing to do would be to make sure she gets her own place again, something to keep her mind of things and a way to make it through the day. Financially he could still support her, but she wouldn't be an interference in his life.

[Guest aok]

I haven't moved out but am supporting them and the rest of the family. Yet I'm not allowed to have fun, date, have friends, etc. I grew up having to follow my parents words and dreams but not mines even til now (close to being 30). I love my parents even if they don't love me but I think it's time I should find my own place and move out so to have a little more freedom to breathe.