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21 minutes ago, ktcjdrama said:

Really?? Do you mind sharing who they are? 

 

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It´s Jamie and Nikki they are a very famous interracial couple on youtube. And unfortunately there are children involved. 

 

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53 minutes ago, Sarang21 said:

It´s Jamie and Nikki they are a very famous interracial couple on youtube. And unfortunately there are children involved. 

 

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So sad... I don't watch them. Hopefully it's not going ugly as what we've seen lately. 

The one divorce that rather saddened me quite a while ago was Jon Kate Plus 8. -- yes, 8 is the number of children they have. 

 

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11 minutes ago, ktcjdrama said:

So sad... I don't watch them. Hopefully it's not going ugly as what we've seen lately. 

The one divorce that rather saddened me quite a while ago was Jon Kate Plus 8. -- yes, 8 is the number of children they have. 

 

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That´s the thing tho...they are vloggers but when it came to their separatation they kept it very classy. They basically uploaded a video with only text to inform their fans. They kept it short and simple, thanked their fans for their support and asked for some privacy. No nonsense of public fighting on social media. THAT´s how it should be done! 

 

8? that´s quite a lot. Children are always the one who suffers the most in such situation....I hope that it wasn´t an ugly divorce?

 

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7 minutes ago, Sarang21 said:

8? that´s quite a lot. Children are always the one who suffers the most in such situation....I hope that it wasn´t an ugly divorce?

There are sets of twins. They were all so cute. Loved watching them. I think the divorce was rather quiet too. Mom went on to continue with the show Kate Plus 8. But started exploring other things as well. Dad is a Korean descent, I think. I don't follow them anymore since they separated. 

 

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40 minutes ago, sushilicious said:

Question to all. Why is it so typical for the guy to be the one to blame?is it possible to have the girl as the instigator?

 

It's a common misconception that in a divorce the one who will suffers more is the female as a weaker gender (financially, physically and emotionally)so it's impossible for the female to instigates a divorce....Hell, yeah!!! :skull: Beside how a weak female can bully a big bad boy in a marriage life, isn't it?? :skull:

 

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add.

Marriage life is a complicated relationship between 2 people from different background. I usually don't take side, but one thing for sure whatever happens in the marriage life it should be keeps privately.....So many factors can contributes to a divorce because again human behaviors is complicated....But one thing for sure, no excuse for cheating.

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1 hour ago, sushilicious said:

Question to all. Why is it so typical for the guy to be the one to blame?is it possible to have the girl as the instigator?

PART 1:

so I want to answer this question in a slightly different way -- so basically the reason many think the guy is to blame is there is some historical bias in terms of divorce laws. so before divorce laws, basically the man would take another wife and kick the old one out. there was no money or settlement and the family suffered. now it is not like women didn't have affairs or find another husband but the number of women being stranded without financials was higher. so even after divorce laws came in, it was difficult to get a divorce. it didn't mean people stayed married. many separated and simply had a live in with someone else. this is what happened in history. the initial divorce laws were in favour of men and so women and children may lose in terms of financial settlements. so after lot of legal wrangle, the laws have changed within the last 50-100 years in many countries where the settlements are more fair. since it hasn't been that long, people are still aware of times when women and children didn't get their fair due and the guy married someone else and the previous children were left out of their inheritance.

 

the other factor is plain economics. so even though divorce was an option, it is only the last 100 years women have opted for it but that has happened only with financial freedom. before, women were dependent on the men and family for money and so would opt to stay in the marriage even if unhappy due to lack of financial options. more women joined the workforce during WII as many men went to fight. this changed the financial picture of many women. so after the war ended, there was a spike in divorces because these women found it hard to adjust to the men who came back but they also had the financial power to manage on their own. in fact, research indicates that financial stresses is one of the main reasons for divorce all over the world. after every recession, there is a spike in divorce. so only with money power and ability to work, women have opted for divorce. so again these changes have only happened within the last 50-100 years and so people are still aware of this.

 

so based on history, many assume that most women would never choose to leave a marriage and therefore, it is the man's fault and he did something so bad. have more thoughts but it is already long on.. will write more a bit later.

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so part II to your question @sushilicious:

 

like @Sarang21 was saying yesterday, what on earth is this argument that if you are a women, you should automatically support the woman? the truth is until we have the facts, we cannot be sure who is in the right or wrong or there is a right and wrong. in some relationships, both are clearly at fault. in some instances, cheating is merely a symptom but there were other issues. in others, cheating is the cause for the relationship breakdown. so basically there are all sorts of varied dynamics.

 

also, this is my personal take but it feels like an insult to assume that all men are bad. why? because we are born from a father, have brothers, relatives, friends, colleagues and even strangers who have showed themselves with honour. to assume automatically that men are etc etc etc is indirectly insulting all the good men there are around. it is forgetting that women can also be bad and vindictive and cruel and just as capable of devious acts. and yes, there are women who lie and accuse to get their way.

 

so when it comes to relationships breaking down, we need to hear everything before we decide someone is at fault. the truth is often more complicated and not that simple.

 

* no number

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13 hours ago, Sarang21 said:

I live in Germany and has never heard anything about him until now :joy:. What´s his name?

@Sarang21  His name is Gerhard Shroeder. Tried copying the link but can't-I'm pretty bad at computers. He's 73 years old I think. He met his 5th South Korean wife when he was working there and she was the translator. Now apparently her ex husband is trying to get him for adultery because it happened b4 the adultery laws changed. The SK wife claimed that she and her ex were already living apart for some time so she said it wasn't adultery.:phew: They were still legally married,Hello !That's why it made the news cos the ex wants her punished for committing adultery. You can google "ex German ambassador marries South Korean wife" and everything's there. 

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13 hours ago, sushilicious said:

Then do you have any sisters who have a family that have triple M?

No ler . I chose triple M cuz it’s the initials of my name , hubs & kiddo . Lol! Yes all start with M . :joy:

 

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8 hours ago, sushilicious said:

Question to all. Why is it so typical for the guy to be the one to blame?is it possible to have the girl as the instigator?

 

Let's discus this :)

 

Actually it's possible. I have seen some nasty girls but they get away with it. Maybe boys don't take those matter seriously like girls, it didn't become big deal or maybe those girls are good are setting shield. It's not men are bad or women are bad. Bad people exists in both genders.

 

I don't know how Western think on this. In most Asian countries, many women still have the mindset of portraying men as bad creatures. Some are so against every actions of the men. This maybe because of suppressing women in the history. Current society is changing, but there are people still trapped in those thinking. After all, men and women have different style of thinking and handling the problems. We just need to respect each other. Biasing and blaming gender won't solve the problem.

 

I love @Lmangla 's analysis.

 

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10 hours ago, sushilicious said:

 

Question to all. Why is it so typical for the guy to be the one to blame?is it possible to have the girl as the instigator?

 

Let's discus this :)

 

604-6042988_c-dinosaur-by-anime-chibi-dino-girl-hd.pnggiphy.gifdrogon.gif

 

After reading so many comments even here about these latest couples I think what was typical once isn't typical any longer and it's because society and for many their way of life and thinking has changed too.  Whether in reality or even fantasy the view and roles of men and women is constantly changing around us. Speaking from dinosaur land my being the girl on the left with glasses about a woman being an instigator not only is it possible in many cases it's probable.  For it goes both ways...

 

It's not so much about being Male or Female but about each persons choices, personalities and principles.  It's more about the truth it's about the where,why and when did the breakdown between them happen. The facts that we will never see or even know.  I'm not even sure if it's a matter of sides because all to often the blame shouldn't be looked at as one sided, it's often shared.  A mixture of so many things even excuses and for so many individual reasons as countless as the stars.  Even though so many are just lies covered up by the skin of desperation, hurt and revenge.  It's sad to think that two people who cared so much end up caring so little.

Maybe that's the saddest part of all witnessing a relationships rise and fall...

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