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RayAmbler7

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5 minutes ago, LSGLMH_88 said:

@USAFarmgirl it is HIS birthday.... I know... I am waiting for him to come back.

 

@triplem have you started to watch any C- Drama except K-Dramas??? I am so busy at some personal problem that i dont have time to watch anything..!!!

 

Winning getting extremely boring these days...I do not only want to win...

 

604

 

No time for c dramas! I’m peddling furiously to catch up on all my k dramas. I’m watching 7 at the moment! Dying :D

 

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@triplem ~ 7 dramas? omo, I can barely keep up with 1. hahahaha... hoping to finally catch up on some more of my dramas on my list.

 

@LSGLMH_88 ~ yea I know those feels when you barely have time for dramas. fighting!

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1 minute ago, Lmangla said:

@triplem ~ 7 dramas? omo, I can barely keep up with 1. hahahaha... hoping to finally catch up on some more of my dramas on my list.

 

@LSGLMH_88 ~ yea I know those feels when you barely have time for dramas. fighting!

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Yes, that's why in some ways all this world cup cancellations are a blessing in disguise...

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true @triplem; all these cancellations give you some time to catch up. am still behind on come hug me. hahahaha...

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6 minutes ago, Lmangla said:

604

true @triplem; all these cancellations give you some time to catch up. am still behind on come hug me. hahahaha...

I hope they up  the pace on C&HM...there's only so much staring that I can enjoy... :D

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@Lmangla @triplem the issue with me is not even world cup...this time we are not even watching world cup... first time ever...My father has been told that he has cancer in prostate... and somehow it has spread to bladder as well...  God knows yaar.. we are awaiting biopsy report..!! Now the thing is , His haemoglobin level is not bad (a little low ) - 12.2 ( range is 13 to 18) ... ESR level is 0(range is 0 to 22)... all the other reports are fine...!!! They say when cancer spreads Haemoglobin goes low and ESR goes high...!!!! I am so scared right now...!!!! and doctor has even started the treatment for cancer... cystoscopy is done... after medication he responded well... did not get any fever , allergy , vomitting etc... now he is getting hungry too... He was unable to eat before start of treatment..!!!! 

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614 :star:

 

@LSGLMH_88 I wish your father and family stay strong.. *hugssss.. 

btw have you seen Lee Minho updates? some of my friend posted on FB and OMG he is so handsome!! love him :heart:

 

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@LSGLMH_88 ~ am a little under the weather and so apologies, if this post is a little over the place. different families react to the situation differently.. so just sharing from my experience

Spoiler

for us, the biopsy report took two weeks. my family is faith driven and so we found it easier to accept the diagnosis. our belief is that we go whenever it is God's will and we have already been blessed in so many ways. our treatment approach was more palliative (meaning managing the condition as best as possible). my friend shared from her experience (her dad already had a partial paralysis from stroke when he got cancer) that one has to be realistic -- some cancers, we are simply buying time with treatment but there's no cure. so her approach was to look for treatment with least side effects. we are friends from childhood and very similar and so I got her view and very much agreed with her.

 

was very firm that we did not want chemo as my dad was quite weak. we were very blessed that God sent us good doctors who also thought like us. initially they suggested radiation but felt that wasn't a good fit either and finally hit upon target therapy which is just medicines. some of the side effects are like chemo but they are much more minimal. by God's grace, he is able to handle the medicines alright.

 

"live up to your name" had all sort of plot holes but it really was a Godsend - heo im says that "patients do their bit, doctors their part and the rest is up to heaven's will". it really reminded me to set realistic expectations of what we can expect from treatment. so thats how I encourage my dad -- to eat the food and medicines even if he doesn't like it because he has to do his part.

 

as caregivers, there is a lot of stress. for me, my faith has made things easier. I don't break my head about tomorrow because I have no idea what the future holds. if I think about tomorrow, I get extremely stressed and I can't handle today's problems. so I don't think about those things. only what needs to be done today and frankly that itself can very overwhelming. I told my dad that I have no intention of crying buckets and I will cry when it is time to cry but not now. so every day, we simply thank God for the blessings we receive and go on as regularly as possible.

 

my dad does worry about the things he hasn't completed but most of the time, he has accepted that God will take care of things and he needs to let go. I have also told him repeatedly his journey will be very different from my uncle who also had lung cancer -- a. they were in different stages on diagnosis (my dad is in stage 3 while my uncle was in stage 4)  b. my uncle opted for chemo while we didn't.

 

unfortunately, people don't really understand cancer and so they spout stuff from their experiences which can make things more confusing. so my suggestion would be understand that cancer is an umbrella of diseases and so their journey may not be the same as yours. people are going to tell you all sorts of things but be clear about the diagnosis, the limitations, the treatment options and your choices. running around like a mad chicken because someone said this is better or that is better will just break you down.

 

as caregivers, you really need to take care of yourself. eat well, sleep well, exercise and yes, relax with dramas. if you are not sane to handle the situation, who else is going to do it? there will be days when it is supremely overwhelming but take it one day at a time. that is all we can do. cheers

 

 

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@Lmangla i am also feeling little overwhelmed..

Spoiler

i understand that people react differently to Cancer differently... You chose medicine over chemotherapy... its all your choice and it turned out to be good...yes let’s wait for the report... i know i need to take care of other things as well... I am strong... your father has lungs cancer? I am so sorry to hear thaat... A hug for you <3 <3.. I also have deep faith on God... I am praying for his power that God give him the power to bear everything.. after all that’s all I can do... I know I need to accept things... when I started reading about it , I understood that Cancer is an umbrella and under that there are lots of other things..!!! also it depends on the body’s capacity..!!! Thanks for your words... Dramas will help me ...but I will wait till Biopsy Report... Thanks for your kind words... it really means a lot to me... !!! Thank you so much...!!!  I am gaining my strength gradually... your words made a lot difference... If something serious happens , we are planning to fly him to Apollo Chennai.

 

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@LSGLMH_88

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am glad that my words helped a bit. it is very difficult to wait for the biopsy report but all we can do is try and be relaxed as possible. my mom is a strong woman of faith but I also know that if I crumble, she will too. so we need to be strong for each other especially as my brother lives far away. whenever my dad gets worried and doesn't understand what the doctor or nurse says, I have to explain in a calm manner and then he is like "oh, I can handle this". otherwise, he starts to get anxious and eats our heads. so you need to keep yourself sane and steady for the family.

 

definitely helps when you understand that cancer is an umbrella and everyone's journey will be different. I was getting so annoyed and frustrated when people are like "did you take this test? this treatment, this hospital etc" and I was like "ummm, this is a different cancer?"... for lot of people, it can be very hurtful and very confusing when someone says "so and so had this type of cancer and they were cured etc" and you are wondering why that option isn't available etc.

 

so it is very important to get your brain switched on and remember that your family's journey will be different depending on his diagnosis, area of body and yes, his capacity for treatment. whatever choices you make, accept them and don't second guess even if others poke questions. you make the decisions as best as you can and rest is up to God's will. we can only do our part, doctor do theirs and rest is really up to Heaven's will.

 

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@LSGLMH_88

 

Spoiler

I’m not good at comforting but what Lmangla said is correct. Please keep yourself in check and don’t strain yourself too much when it gets hard don’t hesitate to rely on others we are also here for you. Hugsss

 

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@Lmangla

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I also have huge faith on God and I will handle whatever comes....rest is upto heaven... that’s true !! I will also stick to my decision whatever it takes... Thanks...

 

 

@aurora1205 Thank you

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