Is blood relations important?

[Guest P a p e r_C l i p]

I'm not very fond of my family either, I don't really consider any of my family members outside of my immediate important other than the ones i'm actually close to such as my younger cousins and grandparents. My relationships with my immediate family have pretty much only started to improve this past year when I got out of the house.

My mom always stresses the importance of family saying all those things like they're the only ones who will be there for me later, they're important cuz they're family, blahblah all that but personally I don't really believe in that. I get that it's true for some people but it just isn't for me. I wouldn't go as far as to say I hate any of my family members, but I don't have a lot of respect for most of them nor a real relationship, so no, I don't really think it's important.

Most of the people I would consider to be my family are people i'm not blood related to. I don't think a real family kind of relationship is formed just because you share the same blood.

[Guest W.W.me]

I felt the same way just like you now, and even If I don't think I was wrong, now I must say something. you know, sometime the boring sentense like your fathers lecturing, even If I hate that things, Is right. 

But I can imagine now you are not listen to the things like that I understand.

just cheer-up girl, you are young, and be a world wide!

[BEBE_AN]

yes, when it comes to your own family. by that i mean the family that you'll have when you get married and have kids. they'll be the only ones that's left. your siblings and friends will marry one day and maybe move away, and you will not be their priority. they will have their own family that they need to take care of. you can only depend on your kids to take care of you in the future. so treat your kids well because they will return the favor when you're old (hopefully).

[Guest savoir vivre]

more importance or less importance does not arise between the blood relation and affectional relation. this is the personal experience of my own life. one should give the importance to both of them as required. when I was younger and far too emotional I gave more importance to affectional relation than blood relation. But, as I grew older & more mature, I experienced one should lead his or her life balancing the relations, both blood and affectional because afterall it is LIFE.

[Guest .autumn.]

Yes. No matter how annoying my brother might be and my parents are wonderful and I would never pick anyone over them. Even my fiancé comes second to my family. And I can truly say I love you to them.

We argue we fight we show love and adoration when they are needed. My brother always has my back. My mums there to give me a hug when I'm stressed. My dad spoils me. Its not perfect but it's pretty damn close to it.

[Guest Dara-chan]

Wow, really tough question.

I've had several family members (some I was close to) do terrible things to me, so I can sympathize with you.

It isn't a problem if you are not exceptionally close to certain people in your family. All you need to remember is that they are family so you have to be respectful even if they're not. I just want to point out that showing respect and being good friends are two differen things though. You don't have to keep in close contact, just send them birthday and Christmas cards every year, and be polite to them when family meetings (funerals, weddings, reunions, etc.) come up.

Family is close becuase honestly your stuck with them for life (unless you go to court), so that's primarily what your dad and friends are getting at. 

It's better to try and build peaceful relations with your relations (ha, ha, love word puns ) than let the animosity continue. Your family may still be rude, but keeping on good terms by being the better person will help repress a lot of drama.

[Guest bombb_]

i think blood is thicker than water.

family should be the most important, imo.

but it does have conditions.

i.e. do they love you as much as you love them? is their mutual respect/love?

for me, i define "family" first and foremost as my immediate family--my parents+one aunt, siblings, pets.

everyone else...well, we're blood related but i don't really know them. i put them in a category just slightly higher than "friendly classmates/acquaintances" since it might be hurtful to my mom/dad to just put them in that category..haha.

thus, i think there are multiple versions of the word family and it all depends on how you define it.

and in regards to always choosing family above everything else, i share that view (but again, only with my immediate family).

my mom raised my siblings and i this way, and i'm glad she did...i quite like this view haha (is it weird to say that?).

so, if my sister and i come to like the same guy i would give it up. my sister would probably give him up as well.

i think this also goes for friends-you'd-just-about-consider-as-a-sister. if you both like one guy, you should give him up without a thought (and possibly she should as well).

i feel it's unfortunate when family doesn't have this sort of relationship. i feel as if anything is fixable, but it could come at a great cost/disadvantage to one party...

if it's a manageable cost, i'd say take the burden. family is really all you'll ever have.

i dont even think boyfriends/girlfriends should be in the same category as family...not until s/he's a husband/wife...but even then s/he will be slightly beneath my immediate family in importance/consideration.

i've been told i'm naiive and sheltered though, hence my views. but, i'd rather be a hermit than give up family for "love."

[Guest CaramelSweetie]

Siblings yes, cousins I've grown up with yes. But not those who are more like complete strangers to me. I have tons of cousins, aunts and uncles in China who I have met maybe once in my life time who can disappear from this earth, and I don't even care. There has to be a past I have shared with the person for me to connect that deeply.

[Guest writersblockcjhsu]

Family are who makes you feel good about yourself. .

Blood is thicker than water, but why choose blood when it makes you feel like crud?

I say you choose who's in your family. Screw the blood and water crud!!!

[Guest moehawk]

I'm the type of person that don't bond well with just anyone, even family. Honestly I can say I hate the majority of my relatives however my dad thinks I'm just going through a phase and always lecturing me how "blood is thicker than water" when it comes to relationships. He says that's all I'll have left when I'm older, which he's probably right. I however can not stand them though,literally I've had some die on me and I didn't care. A lot of them has treated with great disrespect, especially during the time I was extremely depressed. Those years of bs has made me not care for them at all. I talked to my friends about this and they agree with my father saying family is the most important but I can't believe it. I don't believe being related is as important compared to overall good relationships.

So my question is, is family really important just because you're related?

we are people first before we are friends, family, co-workers etc.  that being said a lot of my relatives don't like me... and i don't like a lot of them also.

[Guest adoredior]

Yes and no.

Like most people here I don't have a good relationship with most of my relative. I don't trust them with anything personal about myself because I know they will blab it to the whole world. Same goes with my siblings.

Just because they're catagorize under family it doesn't mean I should always put them first. But my parents I can tolerate. And even tho they annoy me with their endless lectures I know its because they genuinely care about me. And I know whatever happens they have my back. So for me it doesn't matter if I have a negative relationship with everyone as long as my relationships with my parents isn't ruined.

[Guest Dhari]

My mother is my rock, and my grandma just passed. They were the few people that I can say that truly meant the world to me. They have stayed beside me through everything, and although my relationship with my family is not close. I do not think that I could ever cut ties. My family is a gift, they care about me, and worry about me, and others are not fortunate to have that. So I feel blessed when I know they are still living.

[Guest kelliecube]

Not to me. All my 'family' wants from me is money.

[TVBuddy]

I LOVE MY FAMILY FOREVER AND ALWAYS! Each day with them is a blessing, thank god!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Guest JaruJaru]

I don't feel like blood is that important within a relationship, I call whoever has my back when I need them most my family. I've also had people in my family die and not shed a tear, but that was because they never respected me or really even talked to me. I do however have a few close cousins I've grown up with since I was 2 and I love them as much as I love my tight-knit group of friends.

[Guest ddcee]

For me, only my immediate family matters.I mean, my grandparents will always matter to me as well.However, I do have some strong bonds with my cousins/aunts/uncles, but a lot of them are stupid and I refuse to talk to them.. since all they care about is "money" and they sit there and criticize me for no reason. 
I could careless if they died as well, I wouldn't cry for them. I treat everyone equally, even with someone whom I share blood with. 

[elley]

For my I mmediate family they're important no matter happen, you will realized how they're important if you grew older...you will understand the things that you're parents lecturing you every morning, when i was young i was really annoying early in the morning my mom lecturing me what to do, what's not to do. I really hate go home after school here we are again, lecturing...before and after go sleep....so much reminding. When the time my mom died, I just realized how much i missed my mom early in the morning the noise, lecturing, everything. And now my dad is the one left, it's not to late to show my present how much i care, love which I never show it to my mom....No matter what happen immediate family come's first into my life. I never say that my both side family are perfect but atleast i just trying to be closed to them.

[Guest Ryuzaki101]

Only if your close with some of them. Of course you wouldn't even ask the question.

[Guest lulubeebows]

No, it's not. Blood isn't everything especially since they're not treating you well, but do realize, if they do really do acknowledge you as their family, they'll always have your back. You just won't see it through their stubbornness.

[Guest dot.1430279747]

No, family is not important just because you are related.  It's funny because just a few days ago I had a little rant about this exact topic.