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Girlfriend Threatening [Problem fading away - Page 4]

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Guest killjadeskye

LOL I was actually going to say "Good for you!" after reading your second last post, for being able to figure what went wrong with your girl. But then when I read that she STILLS expect some funding from you, I was like, "What??" Dude, it's so confusing.

But, my conclusion is that, ehem:

- She did say all those stuff about money just to get revenge or some sort. She's not as materialistic as she appeared to be, but she still needs money. However, since your mom is not is good condition, it's better if you stop transferring money into her account. Your MOM is much more important than you girl. Your mom is irreplaceable, but girls come and go. If she wants to dump you for a financially-stable (a.k.a rich) guys, then let her go. Tell her she's not worth your time. Oh, and don't forget to ask for your money back. EVERY single cent.

I do feel bad for your girl's situation, having a mom like that, and how she ended up as a babysitter. It really sucks. I understand, coz my BFF has 6 younger siblings to take care of.

Oh, and stop buying laptop for your girl. She obviously doesn't know how to take care of things, or how much its worth. Or rather ignorant. Neither one is good.

She needs to understand that even if you're in a relationship, you can still remain friends with other girl. But you should NEVER flirt, at least not that often...

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God you're dumb and weak.

You know what? If you're aware that she's using you and STILL do nothing, you deserve to be walked over and used.

She hasn't changed, can't believe any guy would want a girl like this.

This is absolutely ridiculous.

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I've read other posts but won't bother replying... They have good points though!

killjadeskye especially... I agree. :)

WOW i can't believe she's still expecting you to give her money.. seriously COD MW2 FTW.. i'm still stuck in the 19th century playing counter strike 1.6 ):

I still play the first COD MW too, with friends, just to relax once in a while hehe...

Oh don't worry, I'm also stuck with the classic game "Unreal Tournament" from the year 1999... haha!

In fact, I have created a popular clan there but I've let other leaders taking responsibilities for it... I'm still their founder though... :D

wow, so even after you talked through this with her, she's STILL expecting support!? Be careful...I wouldn't necessarily trust what she told you when you talked. She might be trying to make you feel bad so you don't break up with her, and then continue to support her. Be careful...

Exactly... I'm currently in a very cautious mode... So I'm very careful... I accepted my "mistakes" but I'm still cautious about what she does... I won't let her take anything from me until later (later when it clearly shows things seem fair)...

My words are awesome!

I like your words :P Thanks!

God you're dumb and weak.

You know what? If you're aware that she's using you and STILL do nothing, you deserve to be walked over and used.

She hasn't changed, can't believe any guy would want a girl like this.

This is absolutely ridiculous.

So it's very strong, macho and manly to dump girls ASAP when we feel they're using us eh?

I give it some time, I'm just being VERY cautious right now. I don't lend any penny anymore. Get her used to a huge moment without support.

I had the thoughts of seeing every girlfriends bad side before (now all ex) and I dumped them right away just from it without even wanting to hear them talk. You probably have no idea but I was known as a player for what I've done to girls in the past (dumping dumping and dumping after spotting mistakes from them)... That was strong wasn't it? Like wasabi up to their head! [HEADSHOT]!!!

Or is everything "weak" including your comment?

Over and out.

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Guest justanothergirl

Tell her to get her own job! A minimum wage job at KFC at her age is kind of............... wow. Tell her to work hard for her money, you obviously do for yours. You are not obliged to pay for her ANYTHING if you do it is because you sincerely want to..not because she is forcing you to. that's just ridiculous. She is using you for your money and if you're too blind to see that and stop giving her gifts/money then maybe you deserve to have this happening to you.

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So it's very strong, macho and manly to dump girls ASAP when we feel they're using us eh?

I give it some time, I'm just being VERY cautious right now. I don't lend any penny anymore. Get her used to a huge moment without support.

I had the thoughts of seeing every girlfriends bad side before (now all ex) and I dumped them right away just from it without even wanting to hear them talk. You probably have no idea but I was known as a player for what I've done to girls in the past (dumping dumping and dumping after spotting mistakes from them)... That was strong wasn't it? Like wasabi up to their head! [HEADSHOT]!!!

Or is everything "weak" including your comment?

Over and out.

I mean you're weak in the sense you know she's using you yet you don't do anything about it. Like you're still with her.

She doesn't take you seriously. She threatens you. She hurts you intentionally. She OBVIOUSLY doesn't care about you. Yes I can tell you're in love with her, but is this love seriously worth what she's doing to you? She's screwing you over. My post up there sounded harsh, but that's cos I'm just so angered for you, and annoyed that you say she does this and that, yet at the end of the day, nothing is changing.

Her traits shouldn't be sth you should condone. A user, a girl with no conscience and obviously likes to toy with your emotions and manipulator doesn't deserve half amount of chances you're giving her.

Look back at your first post and see how many red flags it's bringing up. You don't deserve this kind of treatment. You obviously are a good guy, now you need to find sb that treats you right.

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Guest OneChance

Sorry but it seems like she's just using you for money.

She doesn't seem like she UNDERSTANDS you at all. <_<

You're already struggling and now she's putting you under more pressure to support her.

You've already got enough to handle.

Maybe you should have a serious talk with her.

Or I think you should stop supporting her at all.

She should be old enough to support herself by now!

I think you should either talk to her and let her know you CAN'T support her right now and she should get a job or something or you should just end it with her. You're meant to be happy in relationships and understanding of each other but it doesn't seem like you're happy with her actions and the things she says to you right now and she doesn't seem to understand your situation at all or even care.

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Guest -MeiMei ♡-

I think she needs to become more independent because she's depending on you to pay for everything. You're only her boyfriend! and she's already 22. You have to support your mum, because she's someone you can't replace. A girlfriend you can. I'm not saying dump her and get it over and done with but you gotta see that if she doesn't care about your situation when you truly care about hers, your relationship is a little ..lop-sided.

Even if she's just 'angry', 'stressed out' etc. it's not right for her to get into thinking that because you're her boyfriend you have to help her with every problem in her life, and especially if she threatens you with finding another man. Cheap threats - not good.

She's taking you for granted by doing this, but give her just a bit more time and check out the situation. You migth want to talk to her about your side and have her realize that your family needs you and that she's being really unreasonable about the whole situation. In my opinion, you should find someone who can treat you right if she doesn't understand and thinks everything is about her. What stands out the most is that it seems like she is using you for your money.

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Guest I_Love_Rice

1. 2 two are still young

2. she sounds so spoil

3. IT'S UR FAULT FOR SPOILING HER IN THE BEGINNING.

*** buying her a new laptop blah blah blah blah BAD

You should think about it, if she's like this now, she will be like that later on when marriage. Guys should always test out girls in the first place. Make instead of Buy. You should only waste money when you two are married.....

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Update:

I didn't even spend money for her birthday... She now believes I'm not bullcrapping (like how she was afraid I wanted to keep money just to go to a strip club or something that I don't do at all such as clubbing or whatever) but now she's more clean in her mind... She lets me do whatever I want with my money. She clearly sees now that I need to help mom and nowadays she's hoping for her to get better. She understands things how they should be. It seems like in the past days, she was going through a depression, with her periods and all the stress hardcore menopause style... But now she knows it was her worst mistake of her life and she kept apologizing... Good thing I gave her a chance... Through her understandings and her efforts recently, she is where she must be at age 22. She wasn't raised properly (and lost 2 years because of it) but her study is going very great too (she's so constant... 100% A+ ownage to the point her examples are set in her whole college). At that pace, she could become a doctor or lawyer or something... I kept cheering up in that... and nowadays she's back happy and cheers me up for my business too... It seems like it was all about finding something that would boost our moral lately while we were busy. We're still busy but we know how it works now... Things are fixed and I'm very glad and happy. My business plan is about expansion and I'm on my way to go to a positive future.

After many talks, problems are fading away more and more... We're back like a couple with good chemistry. Still loving each others so much.

Many people left at her job and even one person died. She's having more time and more works... and getting paid more...

Anyway, it's clear we prevent the same problem from coming back now... We both work hard on our plans.

And she learned and understood things more... So no more question about money...

Tell her to get her own job! A minimum wage job at KFC at her age is kind of............... wow. Tell her to work hard for her money, you obviously do for yours. You are not obliged to pay for her ANYTHING if you do it is because you sincerely want to..not because she is forcing you to. that's just ridiculous. She is using you for your money and if you're too blind to see that and stop giving her gifts/money then maybe you deserve to have this happening to you.

I admit I was "blind" at first, then got confused, but after thinking a lot (with some few advices gathered together here that I like), BOOM now things have been solved. We had a good talk and gave ourselves some space. The reason why I was "blind" was because I trusted her and wanted to support her when she had problems. I think it's normal when we're being KIND. Something that I thought could be occasional. Until I realized that it seemed that she wanted to rely too much on me no matter what, that's when I was here thinking what the heck is going on. So I splashed cold water on my face and I have splashed some on her face too and here we are now, not gonna let this kind of problem happen again. She has learned the right way now.

We all deserve problems somewhere but there's always something to do about it, always a solution for us to make our decisions. That's mine.

I mean you're weak in the sense you know she's using you yet you don't do anything about it. Like you're still with her.

She doesn't take you seriously. She threatens you. She hurts you intentionally. She OBVIOUSLY doesn't care about you. Yes I can tell you're in love with her, but is this love seriously worth what she's doing to you? She's screwing you over. My post up there sounded harsh, but that's cos I'm just so angered for you, and annoyed that you say she does this and that, yet at the end of the day, nothing is changing.

Her traits shouldn't be sth you should condone. A user, a girl with no conscience and obviously likes to toy with your emotions and manipulator doesn't deserve half amount of chances you're giving her.

Look back at your first post and see how many red flags it's bringing up. You don't deserve this kind of treatment. You obviously are a good guy, now you need to find sb that treats you right.

It's her first time being in a deep serious relation and this has been the biggest mistake from her so far. Now she knows what she shouldn't do in this love relation... and I'll be watching over that to make sure she won't bring that mistake back because I won't fall for it twice from the same person. But so far, she's going by herself through the right path full of positive news and she's becoming happier without any question of money. Looks like my recent act and talks have made some impact for both of us now happy.

Thanks "big sis" for caring by being angered for me, I appreciate it. Salutes`.

Sorry but it seems like she's just using you for money.

She doesn't seem like she UNDERSTANDS you at all. <_<

You're already struggling and now she's putting you under more pressure to support her.

You've already got enough to handle.

Maybe you should have a serious talk with her.

Or I think you should stop supporting her at all.

She should be old enough to support herself by now!

I think you should either talk to her and let her know you CAN'T support her right now and she should get a job or something or you should just end it with her. You're meant to be happy in relationships and understanding of each other but it doesn't seem like you're happy with her actions and the things she says to you right now and she doesn't seem to understand your situation at all or even care.

After things have been settled and this problem is fading away, what you wrote seemed right at the time... but nowadays it's going opposite of what you wrote which is great. So far so good... It took some time and I'm still looking at how long things will take while we're both on our way to "success" in life. I tried to gather every proof possible to convince her, I felt like a lawyer haha... Even stupid ones that worked, example, she made a quizz on her facebook and one of the question was "Who would she want to meet the most?"... and one option was "Her boyfriend"... But her real answer was "Her future self"... So I was like I'm not everything to her, so in this case, she has to stand strong on her own then... I was enough support occasionally. And I can't take her as "my everything" in this case. She's not first in priority for where my money will go now. Far from there.

And other blah blah...

Anyway she's where I want her to be now... and she's understanding my situations with mom and all... I didn't live with mom but now I do, in order to watch over her. Sometimes it's my bro living with mom and I just get back to my locations... I live in 3 different places in a way. My business made me so.

I think she needs to become more independent because she's depending on you to pay for everything. You're only her boyfriend! and she's already 22. You have to support your mum, because she's someone you can't replace. A girlfriend you can. I'm not saying dump her and get it over and done with but you gotta see that if she doesn't care about your situation when you truly care about hers, your relationship is a little ..lop-sided.

Even if she's just 'angry', 'stressed out' etc. it's not right for her to get into thinking that because you're her boyfriend you have to help her with every problem in her life, and especially if she threatens you with finding another man. Cheap threats - not good.

She's taking you for granted by doing this, but give her just a bit more time and check out the situation. You migth want to talk to her about your side and have her realize that your family needs you and that she's being really unreasonable about the whole situation. In my opinion, you should find someone who can treat you right if she doesn't understand and thinks everything is about her. What stands out the most is that it seems like she is using you for your money.

All those... now she wants me to think it was just a nightmare and she's getting better...

Thanks for the reply.

1. 2 two are still young

2. she sounds so spoil

3. IT'S UR FAULT FOR SPOILING HER IN THE BEGINNING.

*** buying her a new laptop blah blah blah blah BAD

You should think about it, if she's like this now, she will be like that later on when marriage. Guys should always test out girls in the first place. Make instead of Buy. You should only waste money when you two are married.....

Hmmm do you need to yell at someone that it's his fault when it's clear that I WAS THE ONE SPILLING THE MILK!? Geeze... I would actually be proud to yell "I BROKE YOUR LEGS, IT'S MY FAULT, HELL YEAH!" after beating up a guy I hate to death. It's already ugly to yell fault this fault that in the first place when it's so obvious. Thanks for stating the obvious.

So, if a human is like this or like that right now, he/she will be like this or like that later on as well? Hmmm maybe I should bring you to my paramilitary training to change that thought... There's a lot of things to learn there about life and changes, even by yourself through survival mode... Philosophical stuff will pass through your mind... This is not even a matter of LOVE anymore when I'm talking about this. I know what LIFE is. I'd be mocking anyone who tries to go into survival mode against me if they think I know nothing about life. So many people grew up in societies where they use objects made by others, watch too many movies and dramas, etc... That's LIFE for them but once they are stuck in survival mode, limited to everything and being surrounded by deadly animals and insects, maybe we should think again if we don't believe in CHANGES in life, otherwise, die. Humans are all adapted to changes made around them and that's how they change something about themselves along the way too. That's what makes us special. So, you still think a person can't change from today until many years later? It might be true but HOW CAN WE CONFIRM IT?

A human is not a programmed robot without updates. At some point, there are things that can be changed, artificially or naturally. But of course it's best naturally. Having a high belief in something, high ambition, it can be helpful into making some POSITIVE CHANGES, EVOLUTION, UPGRADE, IMPROVEMENT. Why do you think I'm a team leader?! It's because I keep my hopes high and a lot of team went down compared to us. It's in fact an ultimate weapon. I only see a lot of "I give up quick" kind of people in here...

Sure LOVE is something else to me that I still gotta discover more from opposite gender. Quality over quantity, who cares how many ex I had in the past... But about life, don't even talk about it. Every humans ALWAYS learn about life, so this is why CHANGES are possible. Not only in love, but ALSO in family and friendship.

If you think you have learned EVERYTHING about life already to even tell me my girlfriend won't change like as if it's 100% confirmed, then tell me, where do we all go after life is over hmm?

That's right, you have your own belief, I have my own belief, we have our own opinions.

You don't believe she will change, I BELIEVE she will because she has learned so much from me and from her life... I have witnessed all that. So I'm willing to give some chance in this, and so far so good. She is ADAPTING. Thus, she's changing.

Humans don't always walk the same path and they don't always go through the same direction, pal.

Here's my metaphor, I'm driving this car with my girlfriend next to me and things are fine, if not, I'd kick her out of the car at full speed, how's that? So she could just do whatever on her own, go to whatever path and direction she wants. Well fortunately, things are fine and getting better.

Sorry but I admit I felt offended by that statement. It woke my nerves up. It's this overwhelming pride for LIFE in HUMANITY that I have. I'm not dating a dog or a robot.

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Guest sus

hmmm i didnt read ur whole post

cos i was too lazi~~

but i read a few lines

that u work to support ur gf

n u pay her rent if i read it rite

hmmm she should make her own money.. ur not needed to work a sec job to support her

that aint love

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Guest stegorawrus

Well I've read the updates, most of it anyway. First reaction was "holy crap, [usual responses from everyone]" and now with this latest update.. I just hope that if she did change, if she does it again... I think you'll get the same responses again if you ask.. But I kind of understand where she's coming from but in my own experience, there'll be a risk that she might do it again (the threats?tantrums), so watch out for that. All in all though, I am glad though that you are there supporting her in this calmed down moment.

Update:

. Good thing I gave her a chance... Through her understandings and her efforts recently, she is where she must be at age 22. She wasn't raised properly (and lost 2 years because of it) but her study is going very great too (she's so constant... 100% A+ ownage to the point her examples are set in her whole college).

^ To put my opinion out on that, there are some girls out there who don't grow up at all and luckily she's starting to realize this moment now.

So cheers to you and I hope the future will be good for the two of you.

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