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I Don't Know How To Act Around The Guy I Like. I'm Too Nice And Boring. :(


Guest feeling.infinite

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Guest feeling.infinite

I have no idea how to flirt or play hard-to-get or anything either!
Hi Soompiers, I really need your help.

Alright so the guy that I like, I have no idea how to act around him. It sucks because I'm a really nice/shy girl so that's what he's used to me being like, and he acts nice and polite back to me to show respect I guess. But I don't like it because it's so boring! Ahh! And this makes me think, wow, am I this boring to him too? because I'm always too scared to make fun of him or flirt or anything.

I also have no idea how to flirt. D: I've sort of tried teasing him but then it gets awkward since we're not used to making fun of each other, and we're too used to simply being nice.

Also, from reading another thread about how girls don't like nice guys, it makes me wonder if it's true the other way around too. And if it is, ahhh! I feel like I'm so boring. :( And I also make myself too available and I always end up feeling rejected in the end.

How can I improve my situation? Can you guys please give me tips because I'm a huge noob at this stuff. What can I do to, uhh, "spice things up" if you will? I feel like I'm wayyyy too nice and boring and just a doormat to be walked over . :( Do you guys know any fun things I can say/do or how to flirt or just something to be more interesting?

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Guest Shikabane Hime

http://www.soompi.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=262196

Find a bad richard simmons. They'll spice your life up like no other! You'll be doing things you may regret, but who cares, live life to the fullest B)

With a bad richard simmons, they'll take control while you take the backseat. It's alright, cause they enjoy it.

Win-win situation. Screw the nice guy, leave them to die in the curb cause they failed to approach the game of love with proper stats allocation.

im having the same problem. i hope someone can give both of us advice!

I'll tell you why you're having the same dilemma.

i sorta agree on both ends. the bad boy leaves u wondering and wanting more.

but the nice guy is someone u can picture that stays by ur side & u feel fulfilled and satisfied

too bad u cant have both

This is why you're having a problem.

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Guest 한스 ㅋㅋ

He doesn't act nice and boring because you act that way. He IS boring, not your problem.

I think you're pretty confused. One second you said you like him and another second you said you're bored of him.

Think over it, do you like him or not? doubt it's gonna last long if you're already bored with him.

But if you still wanna try, then it's not hard.

Just..... just show interest. Show that you like him. Initiate conversations first.

if you're at school and in class together with him, maybe ask his friend where he is when he's away. (usually his friend would tell him that you asked)

I think even the dumbest guy would know that's a sign.....

Since you're shy, I'm sure you already know, but you follow him, not lead him.

and constantly try to make him think that "you need him"

like ask stuff about homework... ask help... But don't ask too much... otherwise he'll see you as a lazy girl.

Guys like it when girls ask for help :P I mean, they want to be someone who is the superior, so they will like it if you ask for help.

but like I said, don't ask for small lazy things.

basically just ask if you don't know how to do something. If it's your duty, you do it, don't tell him to.

uh too much writting, bottom point, if you want him to ask the question, then minimize his risk of you saying "no"

You won't say no probably, but he doesn't know that, he can only rely this on the signs you gave him.

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Guest Torento <3

http://www.soompi.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=262196

Find a bad richard simmons. They'll spice your life up like no other! You'll be doing things you may regret, but who cares, live life to the fullest B)

With a bad richard simmons, they'll take control while you take the backseat. It's alright, cause they enjoy it.

Win-win situation. Screw the nice guy, leave them to die in the curb cause they failed to approach the game of love with proper stats allocation.

Exactly! Like the majority of Soompi users here seem to want! They love being second-place to their 'bad-richard simmons' boyfriend.

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Just be weird. Weird is interesting. I'm really nice, but people like being around me because I'm honest and open, but random and weird. Try it... just say whats on your mind haha

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Guest Shikabane Hime

Exactly! Like the majority of Soompi users here seem to want! They love being second-place to their 'bad-richard simmons' boyfriend.

On the contrary, they wish to change him into the sweet gentleman he really is.

Unleash the beast from within!

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Guest another member

i'm exactly the same. i don't know, but around my friends and stuff, i am a pretty funny and generally social person, but around guys i like, i don't know, i just...transform or something. i hate it! and, i also have no idea how to flirt or anything. i think it has to do with a fear of rejection. sometimes i feel like i'm actually trying hard NOT to flirt with any guys. i just don't know how to handle this either. saying "hey, just be yourself" is one thing, but being able to do it is completely different.

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Guest Peace_Maker

Small simple things can show him that you like him like giving him a hug or something...or you always do the old-school love letter thingy xP...hahaha i think its cute xP

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Guest Shikabane Hime

i'm exactly the same. i don't know, but around my friends and stuff, i am a pretty funny and generally social person, but around guys i like, i don't know, i just...transform or something. i hate it! and, i also have no idea how to flirt or anything. i think it has to do with a fear of rejection. sometimes i feel like i'm actually trying hard NOT to flirt with any guys. i just don't know how to handle this either. saying "hey, just be yourself" is one thing, but being able to do it is completely different.

No excuses. Nice guys have to face that kind of crap as well, so I don't see why we should cut the girls some slack.

Find a bad richard simmons, he'll treat you the way you don't want to be treated B)

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Guest Torento <3

Small simple things can show him that you like him like giving him a hug or something...or you always do the old-school love letter thingy xP...hahaha i think its cute xP

I beg to differ.

I like direct confrontation, just tell them.

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Guest Peace_Maker

http://www.soompi.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=262196

Find a bad richard simmons. They'll spice your life up like no other! You'll be doing things you may regret, but who cares, live life to the fullest B)

With a bad richard simmons, they'll take control while you take the backseat. It's alright, cause they enjoy it.

Win-win situation. Screw the nice guy, leave them to die in the curb cause they failed to approach the game of love with proper stats allocation.

I'll tell you why you're having the same dilemma.

This is why you're having a problem.

Gahhh....Oh my god..i believe girls who go out with the bad-asses are dumb...it seems so much like they don't care that they're being treated like trash and all just to try and change the guy or make yourself have a bigger ego!??!?!!? wtf...the same goes the other way around...well don't be convinced that "bad-asses" aare the way to go...only those girls with already big egos like going out with them...yeah i know nice guys are boring and all..but they're always there for you...not all nice guys are as boring as a rock....well like i said before, just the simplest little flirt can be enough...a simple hug...a slight brush of the hands...eyou just need contact...don't be afraid or discouraged to keep on flirting...JUST DO IT!...

I beg to differ.

I like direct confrontation, just tell them.

well everyone has their own ways =P

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Guest another member

No excuses. Nice guys have to face that kind of crap as well, so I don't see why we should cut the girls some slack.

Find a bad richard simmons, he'll treat you the way you don't want to be treated B)

well i never said guys had to go easy on girls like me or anything like that. i just find it frustrating that for some reason, i can't be myself around guys i like. trust me, i've tried, it's just hard for me for some reason, and i'm sure the topic poster feels the same.

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Guest Torento <3

first off dont think about the fact that you like him and just treat him like any other person! lol

Yeah, I get what you mean.

Otherwise your judgment towards your actions around this person will be clouded and you could really screw up.

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Guest Shikabane Hime

well i never said guys had to go easy on girls like me or anything like that. i just find it frustrating that for some reason, i can't be myself around guys i like. trust me, i've tried, it's just hard for me for some reason, and i'm sure the topic poster feels the same.

-EDIT-

Anyways, it doesn't come naturally. If you can't do it, just rely on the guy to take the initiative. In this day and age, girls aren't expected to make the first move anyways, so take advantage of the situation.

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Guest kishycathiee

LOL, I need some advice too. I mean, he makes moves..

but I'm just standing there smiling like some kind of statue TT__TT

and I'm totally FROZEN.

All my friends say "Dang Cathy, why are you so stiff around him?"

oh & my conversations end up ankward.

..some of the Soompi-er's advices can be helpful though!

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Guest Shikabane Hime

If you know he's making moves and you like him, just ask him out.

Come on, what is the worst that could happen?

He's fooling around and says "lol j/k" and then she's heartbroken cause she summoned all that "courage" to say something that should be easily said.

Girls don't want to rejected cause it feels bad.

lol and it's supposedly different for guys, cause guys are "made for it."

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