Crunchyrunchy
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Posts posted by Crunchyrunchy
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UnicornGummi said: Crunchyrunchy said: Why would it be offensive? I am a very humorous person. lol
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UnicornGummi said: Crunchyrunchy said: [hF9] said: Dude, grow some "apples"!it's not considered childish not to want your parents to see you.In fact, my parents are not "mean" but they are old-fashioned about the dating thing, like "finish college, get a work, then you can start dating". Therefore, i was always afraid of meeting my parents when i hang out with a "guy friend". Anyways, you just want to have fun, i guess if it's not fun enough for you, break it off. I'm sure you will do the girl a favour!
Crunchyrunchy said:UPON FURTHER REVIEW, I have decided that termination of this relationship should only be a final option. I am open to proper and logical resolutions. I am going to have a conversation with her and hopefully we will be able to negotiate a fair settlement, but as for now I will need a back up plan in cased she refuses to budge.
The main problem is that I don't really like hiding. I don't care if she never introduce me to her parents during the course of this "relationship" or if her parents see us. This is not my main priority as of now. I am simply trying to assuage the tension that this is causing for the both of us.
Now if I do have to hide every-time her parents get close then well.. That is a final resolution WHICH I AM CONSIDERING.
Now to address some of these obstacles:- She doesn't drive so her parents are usually her ride.
- We live in a city where public transportation are not widely available
I am open to more suggestions on what to do.
To eliminate the obvious though, I already stated that I am going to be negotiating with her. So yes, I will be going to talk with her about this problem soon when I see her.
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[hF9] said: Dude, grow some "apples"!it's not considered childish not to want your parents to see you.In fact, my parents are not "mean" but they are old-fashioned about the dating thing, like "finish college, get a work, then you can start dating". Therefore, i was always afraid of meeting my parents when i hang out with a "guy friend". Anyways, you just want to have fun, i guess if it's not fun enough for you, break it off. I'm sure you will do the girl a favour!
Crunchyrunchy said:UPON FURTHER REVIEW, I have decided that termination of this relationship should only be a final option. I am open to proper and logical resolutions. I am going to have a conversation with her and hopefully we will be able to negotiate a fair settlement, but as for now I will need a back up plan in cased she refuses to budge.
The main problem is that I don't really like hiding. I don't care if she never introduce me to her parents during the course of this "relationship" or if her parents see us. This is not my main priority as of now. I am simply trying to assuage the tension that this is causing for the both of us.
Now if I do have to hide every-time her parents get close then well.. That is a final resolution WHICH I AM CONSIDERING.
Now to address some of these obstacles:- She doesn't drive so her parents are usually her ride.
- We live in a city where public transportation are not widely available
I am open to more suggestions on what to do.
To eliminate the obvious though, I already stated that I am going to be negotiating with her. So yes, I will be going to talk with her about this problem soon when I see her.
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TheJVS said:
Crunchyrunchy
said:
TheJVSsaid:
Since she doesn't know how you're feeling perhaps its time to discuss this matter with her. Since she is the one who can solve this problem for you without having to go through a break up.
It's not exactly your fault that you don't seem to love her enough to look past this inconvenience. Maybe there are no reasons for you to do so at this point. If she's not willing to let her parents know whats actually going on in her life and you are really bothered by her actions... then it's probably not meant to be. Say your good byes. Lots of fishies in the seaaa~ -
TheJVS said: Since she doesn't know how you're feeling perhaps its time to discuss this matter with her. Since she is the one who can solve this problem for you without having to go through a break up.
It's not exactly your fault that you don't seem to love her enough to look past this inconvenience. Maybe there are no reasons for you to do so at this point. If she's not willing to let her parents know whats actually going on in her life and you are really bothered by her actions... then it's probably not meant to be. Say your good byes. Lots of fishies in the seaaa~ -
brokenmachine said: You should set up camp near her family home, get your binoculars out.
p.s. last time I checked, you guys weren't married and had no legal agreement. -
cutiek028 said: Every time I read your posts I get a little annoyed.
I just wish, and I think some other people here wish it too, you would ACKNOWLEDGE the fact that not every one in this world has parents that are understanding. And that you now SEE that and will be more UNDERSTANDING towards her. -
TheJVS said: Crunchyrunchy said: hishari said: Sometimes I just want to hide it from my parents because I don't want to have them ask unnecessary questions. We are just dating for fun, not getting married.
Making a mountain out of a mole hill, aren't we? -
Ninshark said: Crunchyrunchy said: It is just that I don't want any unnecessary drama.
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flysolo. said: When you go talk to her, you should let her know exactly how you feel about her if you have not done so already.From there, it is up to her to make the call.
That's the thing about this type of relationship, you are not in control
Perhaps you might want to stay away from this one, if she was really into you, she would not let her parents to get involved in your relationship. Maybe more information? From what you've wrote I'd stay away from this one -
iilysium said:
wrote:UPON FURTHER REVIEW, I have decided that termination of this relationship should only be a final option. I am open to proper and logical resolutions. I am going to have a conversation with her and hopefully we will be able to negotiate a fair settlement, but as for now I will need a back up plan in cased she refuses to budge.<br /><br />The main problem is that I don't really like hiding. I don't care if she never introduce me to her parents during the course of this "relationship" or if her parents see us. This is not my main priority as of now. I am simply trying to assuage the tension that this is causing for the both of us.<br />Now if I do have to hide every-time her parents get close then well.. That is a final resolution WHICH I AM CONSIDERING.<br /><br />Now to address some of these obstacles:<br /><br />She doesn't drive so her parents are usually her ride.We live in a city where public transportation are not widely availableI am open to more suggestions on what to do.To eliminate the obvious though, I already stated that I am going to be negotiating with her. So yes, I will be going to talk with her about this problem soon when I see her. -
hishari said: Some parents are just those really nasty, judgmental ones who seem to find a million things to criticize. She said her parents are "mean" so maybe they're one of those.
Why does she need to put in so much effort in defending you against questions like:who is he?what does he do?what college does/did he go to?what's his gpa?what's his major?is he a doctor/lawyer/engineer?does he have a phd?does he work? full time?what does he do for work?how much does he make a year?does he get benefits?how tall is he?where is his family from?is he close with his parents?does he respect his parents?ETC ETC. -
UPON FURTHER REVIEW, I have decided that termination of this relationship should only be a final option. I am open to proper and logical resolutions. I am going to have a conversation with her and hopefully we will be able to negotiate a fair settlement, but as for now I will need a back up plan in cased she refuses to budge.
The main problem is that I don't really like hiding. I don't care if she never introduce me to her parents during the course of this "relationship" or if her parents see us. This is not my main priority as of now. I am simply trying to assuage the tension that this is causing for the both of us.
Now if I do have to hide every-time her parents get close then well.. That is a final resolution WHICH I AM CONSIDERING.
Now to address some of these obstacles:- She doesn't drive so her parents are usually her ride.
- We live in a city where public transportation are not widely available
I am open to more suggestions on what to do.
To eliminate the obvious though, I already stated that I am going to be negotiating with her. So yes, I will be going to talk with her about this problem soon when I see her.
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brokenmachine said: Are you really into the terminator...
First time I heard someone use the 'terminate' when ending a romantic relationship. oh well, something new everyday.
And in response to the question, terminate it and save the girl future suffering. -
inxomnia said: I say break up with her. You clearly don't value the relationship enough to understand her concerns or try to communicate about it. It seems all you care about is how it would affect you and how volatile the break up would be. It just sounds like you're over the relationship at this point and frankly, I think she deserves better.
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hearthealer said:
You say both of you are adults, yet some of the things you say and the way you act IS really highschool-ish, you're dating her for fun? If that's the case, what she does shouldn't bother you that much....you don't know her family well because you've been dating for a fairly short period, don't judge, never judge if you're on the outside looking in....she's in the family, she knows the dynamics, just cause it inconveniences you is no reason to break up with a person...
If you're only dating her for "fun" why bother about "obstacles" in the future, deal with the obstacles when they DO arise in the future when you're no longer dating her for "fun" and start to get serious.
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iilysium said: ^ Lol I really don't get it. You say "salvage relationship" as if your relationship has gone to hell over this thing and it's a big obstacle... and then you say this obstacle is "one of the most trivial things" you see... yet you really seem to care that she's hiding you from her parents and it's obviously not a trivial problem to you if it's enough to consider ending your relationship for.
TBH though I don't see how it's really much of an obstacle, more like an inconvenience, since I'm pretty sure you're not going to run into her parents often in the city and it just requires a few minutes of being out of the scenario for a while in the off-chance that you happen to.
I can see it as an annoyance though that you have every right to end your relationship for but I've seen far bigger obstacles in relationships concerning parents, I don't really see how this honestly will stop a relationship from working from what I read in your description unless you find it that distressing to you I guess and the girl's not worth it.
Really, though, you should just bring it up to her about hiding you and the most she'll say is "no, I can't let my parents know" to which you say "then it can't work out" and she has a choice to accept it or not accept it.
And if you really want to make a relationship work, the goal isn't to counterattack her arguments...it's to listen to each other's arguments and come to a compromise/solution...relationships don't last long if the goal is to "win" lol. -
damyoungji said: Rather than making assumptions as to the reasons why she does not want her parents to know about you, why not ask her about it? It will save you your sanity from trying to figure something out about a person you are "dating for fun". Have you ever asked yourself why you are even concerned about what happened? If it is all about fun, you would not even think twice about why she does not want her parents to know about you. IMO, if it is really just for fun, you would be glad that you do not have to meet her parents (to avoid any threats or whatnot from her "mean" parents).
Her parents are probably strict when it comes to the guys she dates. Like most parents, they probably see most guys as not good enough for their daughter. Another possible reason is that she is also dating you just for fun and/or she believes it is too early in the relationship for you to meet her parents. After all, the two of you just started dating recently, so in most people's opinions, introducing the person they are seeing to the parents at an early dating stage is not really important.
In the end, it is up to you. If it annoys you that much, I guess you might as well end it soon, rather than lead her on. -
hishari said: Sometimes I just want to hide it from my parents because I don't want to have them ask unnecessary questions. We are just dating for fun, not getting married.
Making a mountain out of a mole hill, aren't we? -
iilysium said: Lol terminating a relationship just because she doesn't want you to run into her parents is kind of childish too/trivial.
Maybe her parents are strict and as she said, mean.
You ask, what kind of an adult has to hide their date.... Well I am an adult, I do not want to introduce any of my dates to them because I know they will not see him in a good way and be just rude to him on purpose and does not like the idea of me dating and will be realllyyyy annoying if they found out I was dating (He's no good! Did you see the way he dresses...blahblahblah...Azn guys are bad...)
Not to mention my mom is kind of mentally unstable and schizo, so even MORE reason not to introduce them because she will do things like find out his number/stalk him/call him to yell at him behind my back (which she has done before to my boss).
Granted she is an adult, and I am an adult too, but perhaps it saves both parties a lot of grief and is a lot more convenient if the relationship was hidden. Maybe she has good reasons not to tell her parents, not necessarily that she is embarrassed about being with you or anything. You say you don't want any unnecessary drama, maybe she's trying to prevent drama from her parents running into you. If you really have a problem with it, why don't you just talk it out and try to resolve it with her... -
yourface said: If you're just dating around for 'fun' why should you care whether she introduces you to her parents or not?
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Before I start explaining my problem I just want to know that me and the girl I am dating are in college. Our age put us in the adult range since we live in the U.S. She has a great personality (aside from some issues which I will explain below, and her looks are also pretty good.)
Alright to start off, I just started seeing this girl recently. Lets call her Kelly. Kelly and I met while in school, and have spent quite a lot of time together. This escalated to us hanging out outside of school. Everything was going fine when she suddenly saw her mom walking past a food place we usually hang out in. She told me that she preferred taht her mom didn't see me because .. A. Her parents don't know she is dating. B. Her parents are "mean"?
At first I was like WTF... I complied because since I was so confused, I didn't know what to do at the time. So I just listen to her. Now thinking back, I have to state some issues.
1. She is considered an adult by age so having to "hide" from her parents is extremely childish.
2. I am just dating around for "fun", but I have to admit, this is a major turn off.
3. I don't care that her parents are mean. I am dating her... Not them. If anything, I expect her to back me up.
What kind of adult has to hide their date from their parents? This isn't high school and I don't know if I want to continue with this relationship because of this issue. I will try talking to her and she is a pretty cool person by the way. It is just that I don't want any unnecessary drama. -
Whoa...You need to stand up for yourself.. Sugar daughter.
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I am Asian but I was born in the U.S. So I could only think in English.
When girls say that they want to have intelligent conversation.
in soompi hangout
Posted
Meany-chan said: Well, if you mean "girls" as in teenagers or younger, then I guess they mean no immature subjects. If you're talking about women, then I would take it as politics, things happening around the world, sharing opinions on issues that affect us. Whatever subject the woman is interested in. Like me, for example, I would like to discuss the process of storytelling, what symbolism could've been in a movie, etc.