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[Current Mainland Chinese Drama 2018] The Story of Ming Lan 庶女明兰传 / 知否?知否?应是绿肥红瘦

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12 minutes ago, dito said:

 

 

 

Well said. I think GTY even though he understood her personality, never realized ML's past has been a unforgiving teacher for her. The lessons she learned are deeply embedded in her psyche. 

 

ML after saying that then gave him the unspoken go ahead....which then lost the impact of the argument for me.

 

 

 

He knew about her mother , he knew about QH he obviously know's about the crappy father?

 

SO he does know the past of her pretty well yet expects to just have all the love, i also think its most likely been month's / a year since the wedding. 

 

Also what do you mean by saying ML gave QH the unspoken go ahead.

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Its cause and effect the reason he is acting this way because she keeps trying to push him into someone else arms of he will be upset.I thought he made it clear he does not want to be that type of guy at this point.

 

I mean does she not notice how much all of this upsets him?They get along so well its obvious she cares about him,they will get there I dont think it will take much.  

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Just now, dramaninja said:

Its cause and effect the reason he is acting this way because she keeps trying to push him into someone else arms of he will be upset.I thought he made it clear he does not want to be that type of guy at this point.

 

 

She has always dodge the concubines being gifted to them. She used every excused there is. Sooner or later it’ll be hard to dodge it. 

I don’t remember her pushing him or keep pushing him into someone else arms.

The only time that it seemed like it was when she agreed to have him spend the night with MN. But, you can see the hurt in her eyes. I can tell that she is willing to make this sacrifice because she knows how important his son is to him. If that doesn’t show she loves him than I don’t know the kind of love GTY is expecting from her. A love slave?

She was scrambling her brains trying to figure out how to get MN to talk the where abouts of the son. All GTY kept doing is having his temper go out of hand, and ML was the one coming up with all the plans and calming him down. 

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21 minutes ago, cherubstomato said:

She has always dodge the concubines being gifted to them. She used every excused there is. Sooner or later it’ll be hard to dodge it. 

I don’t remember her pushing him or keep pushing him into someone else arms.

The only time that it seemed like it was when she agreed to have him spend the night with MN. But, you can see the hurt in her eyes. I can tell that she is willing to make this sacrifice because she knows how important his son is to him. If that doesn’t show she loves him than I don’t know the kind of love GTY is expecting from her. A love slave?

She was scrambling her brains trying to figure out how to get MN to talk the where abouts of the son. All GTY kept doing is having his temper go out of hand, and ML was the one coming up with all the plans and calming him down. 

He might not see the hurt in ML eyes and her speech when suggesting GTY to spend the night with MN and that concubine, that's why he tests her. GTY doesn't want understanding love between man and woman but more selfish love from ML; like you belongs to me, only mine and no one else kind of love LOLOL

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5 minutes ago, cherubstomato said:

She has always dodge the concubines being gifted to them. She used every excused there is. Sooner or later it’ll be hard to dodge it. 

I don’t remember her pushing him or keep pushing him into someone else arms.

The only time that it seemed like it was when she agreed to have him spend the night with MN. But, you can see the hurt in her eyes. I can tell that she is willing to make this sacrifice because she knows how important his son is to him. If that doesn’t show she loves him than I don’t know the kind of love GTY is expecting from her. A love slave?

She was scrambling her brains trying to figure out how to get MN to talk the where abouts of the son. All GTY kept doing is having his temper go out of hand, and ML was the one coming up with all the plans and calming him down. 

He has every right to be angry about the entire situation he is in with the other woman is missing child and her.He  did not like the sort of plan  she came up with what husband would be happy about that?

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Just now, fancia said:

GTY doesn't want understanding love between man and woman but more selfish love from ML; like you belong to me, only mine and no one else kind of love LOLOL

Women who become like that will eventually become a hot mess.... :ph34r: MN cough MN.... 

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1 minute ago, dramaninja said:

He has every right to be angry about the entire situation he is in with the other woman is missing child and her.He  did not like the sort of plan  she came up with what husband would be happy about that?

She didn’t make that plan up... she only agreed to MN request so that they can get a lead on the son.

 

GTY has always been hot tempered, he wears his heart on his shoulders. And that caused him a lot of troubles in the past. He is lucky to have ML as his wife. She is more than his wife. She is someone who protects and guides him.

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Rolling my eyes at some people blaming ML for this.

 

She was forced into this marriage basically , GTY said he would give her a good life when so far its non stop scheming . GTY married her knowing her history yet expect's love this fast. His actions are annoying me more then ML , ML is not perfect but GTY knew this before marrying her he really does not have a right to get this angry.

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40 minutes ago, leeza77 said:

Well in the novel gty's character was not a romantic outgoing guy. 

 

Yeah, book gty is more vague and more proving with his action, but that’s not the thing with drama gty where he is more open with his feelings. I feel like ml has an invisible barrier regarding anything romantic, she’s not imperceptive,  she just automatically doesnt believe any romantic words that came out of gty. 

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1 minute ago, cherubstomato said:

She didn’t make that plan up... she only agreed to MN request so that they can get a lead on the son.

 

GTY has always been hot tempered, he wears his heart on his shoulders. And that caused him a lot of troubles in the past. He is lucky to have ML as his wife. She is more than his wife. She is someone who protects and guides him.

 

Exactly gty is being a bit pushy for my liking, when QH was being pushy and annoying he was called out but when its GTY people dont say anything really. 

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16 minutes ago, cherubstomato said:

Women who become like that will eventually become a hot mess.... :ph34r: MN cough MN.... 

MN love is extreme selfish love bordering to sickness like you're only mine and no one else can have you; I would rather kill you or your loved one than seeing you happy with someone else :crazy:

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39 minutes ago, ForgottenSoulx said:

 

He knew about her mother , he knew about QH he obviously know's about the crappy father?

 

SO he does know the past of her pretty well yet expects to just have all the love, i also think its most likely been month's / a year since the wedding. 

 

Also what do you mean by saying ML gave QH the unspoken go ahead.

 

After the polo match, in the temple scene in epi17 .....ML was trying to convince QH to stop his pursuit of her.....and listed this long list of things that are against them. Then when QH asked her if you have me in your heart....she didn't deny it. Which then gave QH the go ahead to pursue her even harder. I mean she was trying to stop him but at the last moment got suckered in by his promises and stayed silent....giving him the confirmation. Thats what I meant by her unspoken go ahead.

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3 minutes ago, fancia said:

MN love is extreme selfish love bordering to sickness like you're only mine and no one else can have you; I would rather kill you or your loved one than seeing you happy with someone else :crazy:

Same difference. 

I guess my view is that a woman should love herself first and foremost. Her family second, and her husband third. -_-

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In one of their conversation, GTY talks to ML about his different relationships with his father and stepmother. Basically, even though his relationship with his father was difficult, he was still able to freely express his emotion to father, his anger, his disappointment, because they're truly family. However, with his step mother, whether they were on good term or not, he's always been more careful, polite and reserved, maybe a little pretentious, because she's an outsider. His point is that right now, ML is treating him like an outsider, carefully choosing her words, polite in her action, reserved in her feelings and even a little pretentious sometimes, like when she answers "I believe you", when she actually not. Sucks for him that the obvious metaphor still somehow fly over her head :sweatingbullets: I get why she's like this, but I also get why he's pissed, I mean how many times does he have to tell her? She's  normally very smart, isn't she? Of course, it's frustrating to him that she's still genuinely not getting it =)))

 

His fear is that she's good to him because he's her guan ren, not her Er Lang. He's afraid that she would treat anyone who is her husband this dutifully, be it QH or HHW or him. So he wants her to love him because he's GTY, not because he happens to be her husband. He's not asking her to be jealous, he's asking for some signs that she has feelings for him. This is where his knowledge about her first love really hurt, as he has seen her love someone else before, willing to risk everything for that other guy before, her not willing to risk anything on him right now (or at least he thinks so) just emphasizes the difference.

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6 minutes ago, gleek49 said:

In one of their conversation, GTY talks to ML about his different relationships with his father and stepmother. Basically, even though his relationship with his father was difficult, he was still able to freely express his emotion to father, his anger, his disappointment, because they're truly family. However, with his step mother, whether they were on good term or not, he's always been more careful, polite and reserved, maybe a little pretentious, because she's an outsider. His point is that right now, ML is treating him like an outsider, carefully choosing her words, polite in her action, reserved in her feelings and even a little pretentious sometimes, like when she answers "I believe you", when she actually not. Sucks for him that the obvious metaphor still somehow fly over her head :sweatingbullets: I get why she's like this, but I also get why he's pissed, I mean how many times does he have to tell her? She's  normally very smart, isn't she? Of course, it's frustrating to him that she's still genuinely not getting it =)))

 

His fear is that she's good to him because he's her guan ren, not her Er Lang. He's afraid that she would treat anyone who is her husband this dutifully, be it QH or HHW or him. So he wants her to love him because he's GTY, not because he happens to be her husband. He's not asking her to be jealous, he's asking for some signs that she has feelings for him. This is where his knowledge about her first love really hurt, as he has seen her love someone else before, willing to risk everything for that other guy before, her not willing to risk anything on him right now (or at least he thinks so) just emphasizes the difference.

Agreed sis :thumbsup: you really nailed it.

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During various conversations between ML and Granny, Granny used to always say "As long as you understand, that's the most important."

In this case, I feel ML understands it better. 

 

ML may not love him the way he wants her to be. 

But it doesn't mean she doesn't love him the way she knows how.

The best she can. 

It's never easy to take a child her husband has with another woman as her own. 

She took Rong'er and treated her like her own. 

She was every step of the way with him in his search for Chang'er. 

She was his voice of reason when he loses his cool. 

She was there every step of the way for him.

She was protecting him and his reputation at every turn, with her every move. 

If someone tells me it's because it's her job and duty, she's doing one helluva fantastic job, above and beyond what's expected of any woman, really. 

 

It's not that she wants to push her to MN, 

It's not that she wanted to take the woman in. 

She knows how much he dotes on her, how much he protects her. 

She also knows how much everyone around them wants him dead, or down and out. 

She only wants to protect him the way she knows how. 

Her not taking in the woman might be what he wants right now, but that simply means more trouble for him when they just keeps coming non-stop. 

 

If he couldn't see the hurt in her eyes when he tries to make her feel jealous by saying he will stay with the new woman, clearly he's not paying attention enough. 

Having ML starting to be jealous and sad, in her mind, only gives him more trouble and worries. Why go there when it can be avoided?

If he can't see all that she's done, and he can't see her reactions with his actions, he clearly doesn't understand her very well...

 

He loved her because she's different from normal girls. 

Yet now he wants her to be like any other girl, fighting for his sole love and be jealous?

 

Talk is cheap. Anyone can tell him what he wants to hear. Action speaks louder than words. She said this to him when he last saved her. 

Yet, he can't seem to see it now...

 

 

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In my opinion, ML & GTY is a fated heaven made couple so no matter how hard the situation be, end of the day they will still end tog. Without realising both alr love each other, even tho ML didnt verbally confessed out loud yet her action her sacrifies to support GTY proof her love for him. Their r/ship will grow much more stronger once they had kids. Haha GTY shld work harder with ML making babies lol.

 

Anyway there are some men who like verbal lovey dovey, calling intimately can makes him more happier, I guess GTY is one of them, but on the other hand there are some women who find hard to voice out those intimate words as they felt embarass & shy. But all this can be overcome by more practice, just that the couple need to be more patience with him/her partner.

 

So fast how the time flies, seems the drama soon will end. I really misses our sweet cute young ML.

 

Here BTS & cast interviews

 

 

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I think he is way too pushy because the timeline of the novel made more sense. Here he needs to give her time.

But gty is right to say his frustration because if she doesn’t know she can’t try to compromise. In a healthy relationship you need to know where the other stands. She needs to be more open and he needs to go slow. It’s also a clash of personalities.

i agree that his fear is that like she was the dutiful daughter of the sheng, she is now his dutiful wife. It’s also a matter of communication.

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1 hour ago, dramaninja said:

Its cause and effect the reason he is acting this way because she keeps trying to push him into someone else arms of he will be upset.I thought he made it clear he does not want to be that type of guy at this point.

 

I mean does she not notice how much all of this upsets him?They get along so well its obvious she cares about him,they will get there I dont think it will take much.  

To me, she’s showing what she said right at the beginning, that he overheard. He loves her now, but if she believes and acts like it will be like this forever, she will be hurt when he inevitably disappoints her. She’s only ever been disappointed by her father. In this time a main wife can be divorced for being jealous and not letting concubines in. She’s protecting herself it’s true. But she knows she will be crushed if she trusts him not to go elsewhere. Has he actually promised her not to take any yet? She’s see her father be lead around by a concubine her whole life. She’s seen her main mother be hurt by her father.  And even then he goes and visits his other concubines enough to conceive her and her brother. It’s just so rare for a man to only have one woman that it’s almost a perversity in that society. She’s protecting herself. It doesn’t help that he teases her about it. That he basically wants her to show him jealously (that she can’t fake like other women can because he sees through her). She’s trying to give him her honest and best self while still being a good main wife. I feel bad for her more than him. He has all the advantages and one day whenever he wants to he can have another woman. And another. And another. And he would be lauded for it. I can’t blame her for protecting her heart. It’s her entire life.

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8 minutes ago, gleek49 said:

In one of their conversation, GTY talks to ML about his different relationships with his father and stepmother. Basically, even though his relationship with his father was difficult, he was still able to freely express his emotion to father, his anger, his disappointment, because they're truly family. However, with his step mother, whether they were on good term or not, he's always been more careful, polite and reserved, maybe a little pretentious, because she's an outsider. His point is that right now, ML is treating him like an outsider, carefully choosing her words, polite in her action, reserved in her feelings and even a little pretentious sometimes, like when she answers "I believe you", when she actually not. Sucks for him that the obvious metaphor still somehow fly over her head :sweatingbullets: I get why she's like this, but I also get why he's pissed, I mean how many times does he have to tell her? She's  normally very smart, isn't she? Of course, it's frustrating to him that she's still genuinely not getting it =)))

 

His fear is that she's good to him because he's her guan ren, not her Er Lang. He's afraid that she would treat anyone who is her husband this dutifully, be it QH or HHW or him. So he wants her to love him because he's GTY, not because he happens to be her husband. He's not asking her to be jealous, he's asking for some signs that she has feelings for him. This is where his knowledge about her first love really hurt, as he has seen her love someone else before, willing to risk everything for that other guy before, her not willing to risk anything on him right now (or at least he thinks so) just emphasizes the difference.

Good point...

 

News flash to GTY though, ML didn’t marry him because she was in love with him. GTY is not one to talk when he wanted to marry Yanran for the sake of MN and would treat Yanran well as a husband should. How fair is that then? He needs to stop forcing his standards on ML like calling him Erlang. It’s obvious she is not used to that and is a bit shy. Like what Ml said before, don’t expect too much or you’ll have too much disappointment and you start to hold grudges. 

 

ML is slowly loving GTY in her own way. They should love each other in their own way. What matters most at end of the day is that they have each other. And not think about the what if’s. No wonder they will have a big fight just because ML talked to QH. 

 

I agree though that the best thing in a relationship is having the person you love, love you that same way as you love them... Not one loving too much and not one loving too little.

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