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how can you tell when a guy flirts?

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Posted

ok im a single girl in her 20's and I can't tell when a guy is flirting with me or just being nice and starting a conversation?

I react by just talking a little and walking off. So I can't really tell if he was having small talk or if he was wanting me to talk more?

Im so lost, help please?

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Posted

Guys are never nice and just starting conversations for no reason.

The first thing you need to realise is that no man will ever show interest in you unless he wants to sleep with you. You will never have a man as a friend. So you can instantly assume any man who talks to you is interested/flirting.

However you must realise that 20 or 30 years of sexual harrasment training/conditioning to men has made it incredibly difficult to approach females. Even if we're interested we always have that fear that she will be sexually harrassed if we talk to her. It's really tough for guys to break down that conditioning. Add in a natural fear of rejection and it's amazing anyone is hooking up anymore.

So simply it for the guy. Be obvious that you like him. The more the better. Don't be coy or shy if you like a guy. Let him know. Then he can make his move and you live happily ever after. :wub:

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Posted

No guy randomly talks to a girl he doesn't know for no apparent reason, so if he does then it's a sign that you've caught his eye. The fact that he took the chance and courage to strike up a conversation with you means he probably wants to flirt with you.

Signs he's interested and flirting

- He almost always looks at you (or if he's the shy type he'll occasionally look down). If he starts looking in other directions and seems distracted, then he's losing interest in you.

- He's smiling at you a lot. If I'm talking to a girl I like, I can't help but feel happy lol.

- If he's the slightly more confident type, he'll try to initiate contact often, like grabbing your arm if he sees a tattoo, or feeling your hair to 'inspect a cool hairband' (coz hairbands are cool to guys yeah? Jokes, he just wants to touch you).

- If he laughs at your jokes, even if they're lame.

- If he agrees with almost everything you say.

- If he tries hard to keep the conversation flowing, then he's definitely interested, and is probably thinking "Damn, I'm boring her... I hope she finds *insert topic here* interesting..." At this point, if you're interested in him, help the poor guy out and contribute to the conversation ;)

- If it's not the first time he's randomly 'bumped into you' and randomly 'striking up a conversation' then he's definitely interested and flirting.

These aren't all the signs, but I reckon they're the most obvious ones we guys give out. Think of these signs as letters of the alphabet. One sign alone might not mean anything, but if you notice 3 or more then he's flirting and interested.

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Posted

I'm not a guy, but I think when he's shy around you then that pretty much means he likes you/have an interest in you. I don't think guys are any different from girls.....we pretty much have the same meanings...

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Posted

^ some guys are shy. Some guys are more outgoing with sb they like, it all depends on guy.

Anyway, they usually have this look in their eyes. If you see it, you'd know.

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Posted

I believe Converted has said it all~ 

If a guy keeps on asking questions after another (may it be about you or anything) just to keep your conversation is a sign that he is into you.

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Posted

No guy randomly talks to a girl he doesn't know for no apparent reason, so if he does then it's a sign that you've caught his eye. The fact that he took the chance and courage to strike up a conversation with you means he probably wants to flirt with you.

Signs he's interested and flirting

- He almost always looks at you (or if he's the shy type he'll occasionally look down). If he starts looking in other directions and seems distracted, then he's losing interest in you.

- He's smiling at you a lot. If I'm talking to a girl I like, I can't help but feel happy lol.

- If he's the slightly more confident type, he'll try to initiate contact often, like grabbing your arm if he sees a tattoo, or feeling your hair to 'inspect a cool hairband' (coz hairbands are cool to guys yeah? Jokes, he just wants to touch you).

- If he laughs at your jokes, even if they're lame.

- If he agrees with almost everything you say.

- If he tries hard to keep the conversation flowing, then he's definitely interested, and is probably thinking "Damn, I'm boring her... I hope she finds *insert topic here* interesting..." At this point, if you're interested in him, help the poor guy out and contribute to the conversation ;)

- If it's not the first time he's randomly 'bumped into you' and randomly 'striking up a conversation' then he's definitely interested and flirting.

These aren't all the signs, but I reckon they're the most obvious ones we guys give out. Think of these signs as letters of the alphabet. One sign alone might not mean anything, but if you notice 3 or more then he's flirting and interested.

Agree

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Posted

If a guy keeps on asking questions after another (may it be about you or anything) just to keep your conversation is a sign that he is into you.

Or, he's a very determined telemarketer.

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Posted

wow! I never even thought about it that way? Thanks u guys!

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Posted

Guys are never nice and just starting conversations for no reason.

The first thing you need to realise is that no man will ever show interest in you unless he wants to sleep with you. You will never have a man as a friend. So you can instantly assume any man who talks to you is interested/flirting.

However you must realise that 20 or 30 years of sexual harrasment training/conditioning to men has made it incredibly difficult to approach females. Even if we're interested we always have that fear that she will be sexually harrassed if we talk to her. It's really tough for guys to break down that conditioning. Add in a natural fear of rejection and it's amazing anyone is hooking up anymore.

So simply it for the guy. Be obvious that you like him. The more the better. Don't be coy or shy if you like a guy. Let him know. Then he can make his move and you live happily ever after. :wub:

i agree, especially with the conditioning thing

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Posted

Agree

ops, supposed to multiquote  what'd converted said!

 

Hmmmmmmmm I'm a girl, I do agree with most of yours, but, IDK, but lots of my guy friends did actions like touching hair, grab arms etc etc ! -___- And yes, nothing went on! HAHA! It's just a different case i supposed ! AHAHA

others like look at you/smiling at you etc etc, i think those are kind of true! :D

Sigh, guys! HAHAHA Hard to understand pft!

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Posted

i actually think that u can have a guy as a friend. i have a few really close guy friends and we get along really well. and i know that they're not interested in me coz they have their own girlfriends. i dont understand why a girl cant have a close guy friend... my first friend i remember making was a guy and i still talk to him now.

ive also been in this situation before and i can only think of 3 reasons as to why a guy would talk to a girl he's never met before( or similar)

1. he's interested in the girl

2.he genuinely wants to be friends

3. it was a dare(or similar) made by his friends.

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Posted

you actually cant tell, not unless he makes it obvious... im what you girls consider a "nice guy"....... sucks i know, nice guys always finish last anyways...

i tend to be nice to any girl, i also hangout/ initiate conversations with girls im not interested in at a romantic level, just cause im bored why not?

but if i really liked a girl, most often id pay for her food/movie (i sometimes do this to girls i dont like...) but definately with the trying to touch you business, such as pretending to care about ur hairclip... or grabbing the phone to slightly touch the girl's hands lol.

id say thats the only for sure thing if ur dealing with a "nice guy" lol. for every other guy, you can assume if he talks to you hes interested haha

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Posted

take a guess,

and trust your gut.

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Posted

take a guess,

and trust your gut.

Or:

Trust your groin, take the risk.  :sweatingbullets:

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Posted

Yeah im like 19, and i still cant tell if someones flirting... T_T

i just treat it as there just being really friendly and outgoinging and open minded!

so does it mean there flirting wiht you if they are pickking on you or teasing you?

or if i say stuff like "i wanna watch this movie" and they go "ohh ' lets watch it together, we should go to movies sometime" or something?

mellow.gif

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Posted

Yeah im like 19, and i still cant tell if someones flirting... T_T

i just treat it as there just being really friendly and outgoinging and open minded!

so does it mean there flirting wiht you if they are pickking on you or teasing you?

or if i say stuff like "i wanna watch this movie" and they go "ohh ' lets watch it together, we should go to movies sometime" or something?

*quoted image*

That should be a sign that they want to hang out/go on a date with you.. 

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