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I'm 21 and hopeless

How do j get my life started?
Okay so I'm 21 and my whole life I feel hopeless because I'm trying to get my license and lije I finally passed my written and when I went for road test I failed but like I hate depending people for ride and would love to be Independent and since I have to push my date to may because that's when my sister will have time to take me out driving but I'm the type who wants to get things going and I've been just helping my parents place everyday no day offs and going home and being bored not able to go out to places I want to go like clubbing or seeing people -_- basically I feel useless and no life and I would appreciate if someone can help me not feel useless about my life -_-


  • Morning OceanMorning Ocean Sydney, AustraliaPosts: 156Member


    One thing I've learnt in life is that you can't depend on others. You have to rely on yourself to get yourself to places you want to be. I can understand how you desire for independence.

    However, another life lesson is that patience is required for many things. One thing at a time!

    You failed? Doesn't matter. Just wait till May or find someone else who can help you drive. You get back right behind that steering wheel and practice until you pass. You can do it! ^_^

  • xstarBURSTxstarBURST no. somewhere in a box.Posts: 4,729Member


    I'm lost.

    You feel hopeless because you failed your road test and that restricts you from going out?
    Honestly, I don't see what you have to feel hopeless about. I'm 22 going to be 23 in June. I have not completed my degree. All my friends are graduating. I am used to working and going to school. I some how manage to still have a social life and a boyfriend. I don't have a car. I also hate depending on getting rides from people but I still manage.
  • an6e7ican6e7ic Posts: 19Member


    Do you have to wait for your sister? Is she the only one available to teach you how to drive? What about your mom or dad? Have you also thought about hiring a professional driving instructor?

    Anyway, not getting your license is not going to be the end of the world. If you’re really desperate, then there’s always public transportation or riding a bike. Besides, it’s not always so bad to rely on your friends for a ride if it’s just to go and hang out with them anyway. All my friends and I have a car, but we always carpool when we go out, especially when we go clubbing. It’s no biggie…
  • itrayyaitrayya latchkey princess. California.Posts: 7,221Friend of Soompi


    one step at a time. we all can't just jump over all the hills we encounter in life.

    don't take the fail as a bad thing, just take it as another motivation.
    before you can take your driving test again, keep driving around the block, the neighborhood.
    keep practicing so that by May you will be ready and WILL pass the test.
    practice backing out, parking, turning, etc.

    21 is still young, you can still get many things done in your life.
    sometimes you might just have to tell your parents to give you some space. you need 'me' time too.
    you're not useless, you help your parents.

    if you want to get more things done, make a list of things to do.
    get one thing done in one day, that's a good start. even small things count.
    you're only useless if you let yourself be useless.
    cheer up : )
  • ecstaticstrangerecstaticstranger Posts: 111Member, New Member
    edited March 2012
    Keep trying for your license then! And I know that you help your parents out, no days off, but get a career? Work is pretty much a whole person's life.
    sorry that the person you once loved wholeheartedly is someone you now hate.Suga Shikao--Tsuki No Knife                                       i will.
    Thank you for your tenacious nature. Especially when I rarely speak my mind.
    "Please give me some more time; you’re someone I can love & the one I will love is you."
    June 7, 200810:17PM
  • IrysinonIrysinon Soompi Superstar Posts: 1,460Member


    edited March 2012
    You're 21.

    That's enough to make me wanna cry. Some day you're gonna look back and wonder what the big deal was. If you don't learn patience now, bigger obstacles in the future will be an Eiffel tower to surpass. Find alternatives and use your time wisely by occupying yourself with what can get you ahead if that's what you're aiming for. Practice driving with the time you have. Trying to be independent is great, but everyone should do things accordingly to their pace and not by comparing to others. We can't all be bragging right artists owning the world at 21. My god, what I would do to be that age again.

  • deadgiveawaydeadgiveaway Southern CaliforniaPosts: 535Member
    I know it sucks when other people have cars and get to go wherever they want while you have to find rides, but May isn't that far away. If you can, try to go driving with friends or relatives or maybe practice more with a driving instructor if that would help.

    Going clubbing or out with friends doesn't really constitute having a life, but I'm sure you could still make plans and get picked up. When some of my friends didn't have cars, I never minded driving them when we went out. If you feel bad, you could pay for their dinner or drinks sometime.

    Also, I hope you're working on some kind of schooling. Helping out at your parents' place is great and I'm sure you're gaining valuable experience, but it's worth investing some time into school. It'll keep you busy, hopefully give you a greater sense of purpose, and help get your life started.
  • she-smilesshe-smiles ♥♥♥ Posts: 3,929Member


    First world problem?

    May isn't that far away. But if you don't want to wait for your sister til then, my best advice for you is to just find someone else to teach you. I'm sure you can think of someone who is willing to help you now.
  • MyNameIs_LukaMyNameIs_Luka igbygrl Vegas BabyPosts: 2,048Member


    edited March 2012
    You're 21 and yet you have no sense when it comes to punctuations :huh:

    Although reading that mess of a paragraph alone gave me a headache, I gotta say girl their are worse things in life than not passing your driver's test.
    My Cyworld

    Formerly known as AngelBaby
  • .EpicLifeStyle.EpicLifeStyle Posts: 88Member


    dont you have any friends?
  • AziraphaleAziraphale STOP CAT ABUSE!! Posts: 7,287Member


    Are you sure you're 21? Not 12?
    eight, say you love me, masterpiece
    finito: fragments gesture transient flowers name goodbye  
  • AS1AND0LLAS1AND0LL Posts: 1,272Member


    You're 21, why not go out there rather than complaining about it. Sorry to sound a bit harsh but what's really stopping you? If you're in school joining clubs would be great to meet new people who share the same interests as you or if you're not, you probably have a group of friends who you hang out with.. go out with them, it's not like your parents are going to tie you down and tell you not to go. You're your own boss, do what you have to do, like others have said you are only 21, still young and there is still many more things for you to experience in life, it's definitely not the end of the road for you. Chin up, manage your time with work and going out, you'll be fine.
  • DFO-KingDFO-King Posts: 510Member


    Which part of the driving portion are you having trouble with? Did you get enough practice before actually taking the test? I'm a bit surprised you still use
    Hope for the best and prepare for the worst. 
  • NinsharkNinshark I like crabs Posts: 1,824Member


    don't worry man, I may not get into gradschool this year, we all have struggles.
  • Manyhx3Manyhx3 Wonderful <3 Wonderland ^_^Posts: 6,114Member


    I think I'll just skip the analyzing part because the others have already done that part.
    my suggestion is to practice until you feel confident enough to take the test. don't do it because you want to go clubbing, to places and not depend it on others. DO it for yourself and you only. you want it so you can be independent right? You can go places without taking the bus, walk or bicycle etc. you must want it so bad to succeed. That will be your motivation to overcome this period. then you will succeed.

    Failing your driving test is NOT the end of the world. There are many people before you, who have failed like 1-3 times because they just want it for the benefits of having the license. you're going to nail it next time you have the test. So get over it and good luck :)
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  • samgyubsalsamgyubsal Posts: 66Member
    Try alternative transportation until May..?
    I fail to see why this is a problem that falls to the point of "hopelessness" although it may be a bit inconvenient.
    For one, you're helping your parents, which, in my opinion, is a lot more useful than someone who is 21, bums off their parents, and does nothing but goes clubbing and hanging out with friends all day, wasting away their parents' hard earned money.
  • denise119denise119 Posts: 16Member
    Honey, like I always say if there is a WILL there is a WAY.

    Not to sound so frank but you are 21 right? Do you imply on relying on other people and your parents all your life? Cause if you do your not going to get too far. Life is what you make it so if there is something that your heart really wants you go far it, no matter what and don't stop. The most important thing to realize is that you want it more than you are afraid of it. I know you have the ability to make more of yourself, everyone does but it takes will. Also just because you failed your road test means nothing. Your just not a good driving but we all have flawless. Now go get it girl ;)
  • SunniRiseSunniRise Someone... feed me. Baker StreetPosts: 3,301Member


    edited April 2012
    MyNameIs_Luka wrote on 26 March 2012 - 10:46 AM:

    You're 21 and yet you have no sense when it comes to punctuations :huh:

    Although reading that mess of a paragraph alone gave me a headache, I gotta say girl their are worse things in life than not passing your driver's test.

    You misspelled "there". You are also missing a few commas in the sentence.

    Jokes, lessons and math aside; Learn to have patience and keep persevering. Your life does not end simply because of one thing you failed to do. However, if you do not keep working towards achieving the basic goals, you will not get anywhere. I think the first thing you have to do right now is come up with a list of things you need to accomplish. Focus on one goal first and when it's completed, go through to the next goal.

    Complaining won't get you anywhere. Doing something about the problem will get you as far as you wish to go.
    Feel free to follow. 
  • MyakoMyako Xoulone Posts: 361Member
    Hey leila4ever, if it makes you feel better, I'm older than you and I still don't have my license. :) Though, my problem is that I haven't tried yet, haha. I'm going to do it this year though. I promised myself!

    I think if you really do want your license, you have to work hard for it. Don't half Richard Simmons it and do take it seriously.

    Besides all that, I'm living alone, have a full time job, but I don't feel like I'm butting into people's lives when I actually do need a ride. The trick is finding an alternative way to do things. I live near a grocery store, so I can just walk to get those. I live near the train station, so I commute to work. Going to the clubs and spending money on expensive drinks isn't the only way to have a social life either. That's so high school and college.

    Just have patience, learn slowly, and take your time. No one is rushing you and if your friends are judging you because you don't have a licence, they are rude and you should take a better look at who you are friends with.
  • BrosephBroseph Posts: 365Member


    I have a license, but I choose not to drive because gas is so expensive. Instead I walk or ride my bike and take transit. I probably save close to $600 a month as a result, including parking fees, insurance, and maintenance. If you are having trouble passing the road test, it means that you need to practice your driving skills. Do you know what to do if you get into an accident? Have you considered the cost of driving under the influence and getting caught by the cops? If all you want is to get a license so you can go out at night and go clubbing, then it sounds like you're going to have a hard time in life adapting to its myriad challenges and difficulties.
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