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I'm currently dating someone for two years now and recently I have reconnected with my ex- in which I was so desperately heads over heels for.. I feel so bad because now all these old feelings are being brought up and I miss being with him. But- that doesn't mean I want to be with him. 
I love the dude I'm with and I feel horrible talking to my ex again with all these feelings blasting in the airbut I don't want to just push my ex away, he was a great friend of mine and he's apart of me that I never want to forget. 
Give me advice, I know it's wrong so don't tell me that part. I don't need anyone telling me I'm unfaithful or whatever-- I don't need that right now. 

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Guest hearthealer

Bluntly?
Cut off ties with your ex...specially if you end up missing the feeling of being with him, it's not fair to your current SO...does your current SO even know you and your ex have reconnected?

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I actually think that's ok, I think everyone should do what they gotta do, but the most important things are not to be stupid about it and to keep it moderated. Hope you're mature enough to control yourself, but otherwise enjoy those good feelings. If you can't do both of those, then I suggest the above ^.

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Well, put yourself in your boyfriend's shoes. How would you feel if your boyfriend was reconnecting with his ex gf and his feelings started coming up. I bet you'd feel pretty upset, right? I suggest you completely stop talking to your ex to respect your boyfriend or if you want to flirt and hit up an old flame then break up with your boyfriend first and then do it. Your current significant other does not deserve this.

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You're still in love with your ex.  You also care about your current boyfriend, but not enough to give up your feelings for your ex.  This is normal and happens a lot.  When your current boyfriend finds out, if he finds out, then chances are high that he would break up with you.  If that's what you want, then continue stirring up the old feelings and romance with your ex. The situation sounds pretty bad from every angle and you don't seem to have control over your feelings.  

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I can totally sympathize with you.

I'm married now but I still absolutely am head over heels for my first love who is in the Philippines at the moment. But the thing is, the first person you loved will always be just that. He's just a memory and you probably will never forget him, but the person you're with now will probably never forget you too. You already know what it's like to be hurt, so don't be selfish and let the one who loves you now be hurt because you want to be with your ex who probably doesn't really want you back.

There's a reason why it didn't work out in the first place.

So be smart and walk away completely from your ex because its not worth the pain of being hurt again.  

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Guest DELETETHISACCOUNT

Ask your s/o if he feels comfortable with you speaking with your ex again. I definitely suggest saying what you wrote here about not having feelings of getting back together, but he was a good friend. 
However, it seems that you are uncomfortable with the situation too. So, trust your gut instinct. As much as you miss him, it might just be one of those things that you have to suck it up and not talk to him anymore because you (and perhaps your partner) don't feel good about.

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Would you be okay with being JUST friends with your ex?You say all your feelings are coming back to you and yet you also like the guy you're with right now?That would mean you like them both...?It really depends on who you like more.It'd be unfair to the guy you're with right now if you continue talking to your ex behind his back, while having feelings for your ex.I honestly think you should get rid of one of them.And think about why you and your ex didn't work out.If you guys didn't work out before for something that is different now, like maybe you were too immature back then and now you're grown, maybe y'all still have a chance. But if it was something that is still present now, like y'all broke up because you didn't agree on something and you still don't, then you should not pursue a relationship w/ him further. The past will probably repeat itself.Who matters to you more, and ultimately, who will make you more happy? If your ex is coming back into your life to be your friend but you have different ideas, you really should drop him. No matter what, if you like the guy, you can't be friends w/ him. It'll only hurt you. Good luck! :)

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  • 4 months later...

Thanks guys for everything-- It's been a while since I haven't talked with him. It was a phase that I went through in which slowly faded away because we had nothing more than just memories. 
- thanks. 

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Guest lmtyhmily

Cut off tie with Ex. If you even think you love him, dump him. If you truly love him, reject ex.

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