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Atheists/agnostics: How do you conduct yourself around religious people?


Guest supertammie

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Guest supertammie

Hm . . .  Not sure if this is the right section for this, but I feel this section has the most thoughtful responses.

I was raised Catholic but stopped practicing years ago because I couldn't agree with a lot of things and have been happier since.  My problem is that almost everyone I know is Catholic and a good handful of these people are really REALLY religious.  I try to keep my agnosticism low-key because I want to avoid conflict (the same reason why I never bring up politics, etc); however, I find myself slipping up and offended people.

The other day I was at dinner with my boyfriend and his friends when I said "God damn it."  Apparently, I offended a good amount of people although they were courteous and didn't bring it up and just let it slide.  I feel really bad about it now because although I don't agree with their views, I'd still like to respect them.  I also cracked some Jehovah's witness jokes because one of the guys was wearing a suit.  "John, (the guy)  are you about to ask me if I have some time to talk about Jesus?" =/  John himself wasn't offended (he thought it was funny); but in retrospect, it was really tasteless on my behalf.

So, to sum it all up.  I'm apparently a really offensive agnostic.  Have any of you fellow agnostics/atheists come across similar situations?  What do you do?

Those of you that follow a religion, how do you respond in that circumstance?  What suggestions do you have for the agnostic/atheist?


Another subject, how do you respond to people who try to force a belief on you?  I've managed to avoid this most of the time; but the few times I haven't been able to, it ends up in an argument.

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Guest bona fide*

Some of your friends seem pretty sensitive to me. I mean, if you can't even voice your own opinions because your afraid that they may take it the wrong way then whats the point of the friendship? I wouldn't feel comfortable around people who would get mad at me just for being myself.
A few of my friends are religious. I'm not. I respect their views and they respect mine. We can talk and joke about topics like this without creating tension. It's not like we go out of our way to badmouth the other so there really shouldn't be any reason for us to get offended. None of the things you mentioned sound particular offensive to me - I think your friends just need to lighten up a bit. 

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Guest dolcedor.

I'm agnostic and I do crack religious jokes every now and then, but only around people I know are agnostic or atheist. If I'm around a decent sized group, I keep the religious jokes to myself. Especially if we're out in public, someone outside the group might overhear and I don't want anyone to get offended. Religion is just one of those subjects that are kind of taboo.

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Guest supertammie


Some of your friends seem pretty sensitive to me. I mean, if you can't even voice your own opinions because your afraid that they may take it the wrong way then whats the point of the friendship? I wouldn't feel comfortable around people who would get mad at me just for being myself.


A few of my friends are religious. I'm not. I respect their views and they respect mine. We can talk and joke about topics like this without creating tension. It's not like we go out of our way to badmouth the other so there really shouldn't be any reason for us to get offended. None of the things you mentioned sound particular offensive to me - I think your friends just need to lighten up a bit. 

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Guest supertammie

I'm agnostic and I do crack religious jokes every now and then, but only around people I

know

are agnostic or atheist. If I'm around a decent sized group, I keep the religious jokes to myself. Especially if we're out in public, someone outside the group might overhear and I don't want anyone to get offended. Religion is just one of those subjects that are kind of taboo.


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They're just like any other normal person. I act like me. When someone tries to force their belief on me, I kind of just take it and wish they'd go away. Hahaha. When someone takes the time to get to know what I personally believe or don't believe in though, I listen to what they have to say right back. In fact, I might even be more open to accepting some ideas. I'm not 100% atheist (more agnostic). And I don't appreciate it when people shove things down my throat so I don't do it either. And when people can return that gesture, we actually have quite a nice conversation.

about the joking though....yeah, I don't know any jokes so...xD I guess it's like a friend introducing you to someone who isn't of the same ethnicity of you and then they start cracking jokes about who they think you are. Yeah, I can imagine it being kind of offensive for the other person (especially if they don't know you all that well).

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Guest supertammie

They're just like any other normal person. I act like me. When someone tries to force their belief on me, I kind of just take it and wish they'd go away. Hahaha. When someone takes the time to get to know what I personally believe or don't believe in though, I listen to what they have to say right back. In fact, I might even be more open to accepting some ideas. I'm not 100% atheist. And I don't appreciate it when people shove things down my throat so I don't do it either. And when people can return that gesture, we actually have quite a nice conversation.



about the joking though....yeah, I don't know any jokes so...xD I guess it's like a friend introducing you to someone who isn't of the same ethnicity of you and then they start cracking jokes about who they

think

you are. Yeah, I can imagine it being kind of offensive for the other person (especially if they don't know you all that well).


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Guest hellokatie1618

I am an agnostic and I don't talk about religion with people. I feel it is a very personal thing. I grew up Buddhist, friends tried to convert me to Catholicism, Lutheranism, and etc. They respect the fact that I keep it private. I don't like to explain my personal beliefs because they ARE subjective when it comes to something like this. We do discuss how religious people should be more tolerant and repspectful toward one another but that is the extent of it.

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Guest rickertv2

I find many atheists/agnostics just as self-righteous and narrow-minded as many fundamentalist Christians/Jews/Muslims.
A lot of people don't realize that atheists/agnostics can be as just as fascistic as extremist religious people.
I grew up as an evangelical Christian and I have to say after all these years of learning of both sides of the debate that non-belief in God seem more irrational (for example, the idea that the universe just happen to align itself so harmoniously by pure random chance, lol).


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Guest supertammie

I am an agnostic and I don't talk about religion with people. I feel it is a very personal thing. I grew up Buddhist, friends tried to convert me to Catholicism, Lutheranism, and etc. They respect the fact that I keep it private. I don't like to explain my personal beliefs because they ARE subjective when it comes to something like this. We do discuss how religious people should be more tolerant and repspectful toward one another but that is the extent of it.

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I'm agnostic but I don't really have religious conversations with anyone because most of the people I hang with are agnostic or atheist; even though I attend a Catholic university.
Hahaha.
The only person I have religious conversations with is my boyfriend and he is atheist so our views clash but we're both understanding and don't fight over it.
Making jokes, religious or not, is fun and funny.
Sometimes you can catch the most religious person off guard and they will laugh.
It really just depends on the person.

But if someone tried to force their beliefs on me, I would just ignore them and respond with: "Huh? What did you say? I was trying not to listen to some bull."
Maybe that is a bit harsh but that is how I feel on it.
Don't force something on me if I don't agree with it.

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Guest bona fide*

I was walking towards my house once and a guy (who I came across once before) pulled up next to me in his car to preach to me about why I should start believing in God. I was out there for like 10 minutes and to make matters worse, it was raining and I had no umbrella. So I just stood there and listened. Ugh, lol.
When it comes to strangers trying to force their religion on me, unless I can act like I'm really in a hurry to get somewhere, I have a hard time escaping the situation. I feel like if I start to explain my views, they might continue to force their's and I realllly don't want to get caught up in an hour long argument. 

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Guest 43829

Hm . . .  Not sure if this is the right section for this, but I feel this section has the most thoughtful responses.



I was raised Catholic but stopped practicing years ago because I couldn't agree with a lot of things and have been happier since.  My problem is that almost everyone I know is Catholic and a good handful of these people are really REALLY religious.  I try to keep my agnosticism low-key because I want to avoid conflict (the same reason why I never bring up politics, etc); however, I find myself slipping up and offended people.



The other day I was at dinner with my boyfriend and his friends when I said "God damn it."  Apparently, I offended a good amount of people although they were courteous and didn't bring it up and just let it slide.  I feel really bad about it now because although I don't agree with their views, I'd still like to respect them.  I also cracked some Jehovah's witness jokes because one of the guys was wearing a suit.  "John, (the guy)  are you about to ask me if I have some time to talk about Jesus?" =/  John himself wasn't offended (he thought it was funny); but in retrospect, it was really tasteless on my behalf.



So, to sum it all up.  I'm apparently a really offensive agnostic.  Have any of you fellow agnostics/atheists come across similar situations?  What do you do?



Those of you that follow a religion, how do you respond in that circumstance?  What suggestions do you have for the agnostic/atheist?




Another subject, how do you respond to people who try to force a belief on you?  I've managed to avoid this most of the time; but the few times I haven't been able to, it ends up in an argument.


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Guest SoulAce2

So, to sum it all up.  I'm apparently a really offensive agnostic.  Have any of you fellow agnostics/atheists come across similar situations?  What do you do?


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Guest MKHnic

I'm Christian, but probably more like you.. making jokes and stuff. I don't subscribe to the mainstream idea of Christianity so I've sometimes made jokes that people thought were inappropriate. I've had to stop myself rolling my eyes at some things Christians say- like friends of parents and that. I guess what is good and bad is that people make an assumption, so other christians assume I'm exactly like them and I can fake it enough to get through awkward situations where they ask too personal questions. So yeah depending on who it is I've learned to put on a mask so as to not cause any problems.

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Guest Boomx2Brian

The other day I was at dinner with my boyfriend and his friends when I said "God damn it."  Apparently, I offended a good amount of people although they were courteous and didn't bring it up and just let it slide.  I feel really bad about it now because although I don't agree with their views, I'd still like to respect them.  I also cracked some Jehovah's witness jokes because one of the guys was wearing a suit.  "John, (the guy)  are you about to ask me if I have some time to talk about Jesus?" =/  John himself wasn't offended (he thought it was funny); but in retrospect, it was really tasteless on my behalf.



So, to sum it all up.  I'm apparently a really offensive agnostic.  Have any of you fellow agnostics/atheists come across similar situations?  What do you do?



Those of you that follow a religion, how do you respond in that circumstance?  What suggestions do you have for the agnostic/atheist?




Another subject, how do you respond to people who try to force a belief on you?  I've managed to avoid this most of the time; but the few times I haven't been able to, it ends up in an argument.


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Guest blush

I'm agnostic (who believes in some Buddhist principles as a way of life rather than a religion). My closest friends are Jewish and Catholic and went to school with a boatload of Mormons. We crack jokes a lot about every religion because of how close we are, but I avoid that with the family because they don't understand that I mean no harm.

I don't really talk about religion whatsoever and try to avoid swearing and offense phrases like "God dammit" with non-close friends. All in all, basically avoiding talk of anything religious including jokes to play it safe. If religion does come up, I'm understanding and supportive of whatever they believe in and USUALLY they give me the same respect (the times where they didn't... well, let's just say they didnt make good friends anyway).

I've also had beliefs shoved down my throat before -- some of my religious classmates who find out I'm agnostic have literally tried to convert me by persuading me that whatever they believe is the best or I sin and need to be saved or whatever. TRUTHFULLY, I just nod and agree but think nothing of it. I'd rather not make an argument because they're rock solid on what they believe, and I'm pretty strong on my beliefs. -shrug-

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Guest dolcedor.

I'm agnostic and I do crack religious jokes every now and then, but only around people I

know

are agnostic or atheist. If I'm around a decent sized group, I keep the religious jokes to myself. Especially if we're out in public, someone outside the group might overhear and I don't want anyone to get offended. Religion is just one of those subjects that are kind of taboo.


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